Asians trying to lose weight

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  • Hope you women aren't losing too much weight, guys actually like a bit of meat

    Oh come on, it's always about what guys think! >.>
    We just want to be beautiful.
  • RekindledRose
    RekindledRose Posts: 523 Member
    Quotes from moms:

    "You so pretty if you not so fat!"
    "How come you never eat? Kid in Africa starving!"
    "Just hold in your stomach and it get smaller."
    "Eat fruit and rice in the morning, stop at noon like Buddah. Then you not fat."
    "If you no eat all that food she feel you insult her." (at a dinner party)
    "One your leg bigger than two my leg!"
    "Oh, so-and-so's daughter so pretty. So skinny. Why you so fat?"
    "Did you see so-and-so? She fat now! Almost as big as you!"

    *sigh*
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
    I'm Japanese-Irish-English-Philipino and 5'1. My goal is to get to 19-20% body fat...maybe that will put me around 110-130lbs. Maybe more because I do plan on building up my muscle, not just slim down. Surprisingly, it's never really bother me about the Asian stereotype and even thinking about it now, I still won't let it influence me. I want to be happy with me based on what I've accomplished etc..not because I fit a stereotype.
  • Poorgirls_Diet
    Poorgirls_Diet Posts: 528 Member
    My husband is asian and every time I visited his country I used to get it all the time! They are people that don't mince their words they say it like it is.As we were going out of his auntys house one day instead of saying goodbye,she said lose some weight and slammed the door in my face! So although I am not asian myself I can feel for yas! I have full intentions though of going back to meet that woman and watch her mouth drip to the floor
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
    My husband is asian and every time I visited his country I used to get it all the time! They are people that don't mince their words they say it like it is.As we were going out of his auntys house one day instead of saying goodbye,she said lose some weight and slammed the door in my face! So although I am not asian myself I can feel for yas! I have full intentions though of going back to meet that woman and watch her mouth drip to the floor

    Ummmm.....I think you should be a little more specific than just saying Asians say it as it is. People in Japan aren't typically as blunt. Some are..because people are individuals...but the culture encourages more of a polite push.
  • MucGay
    MucGay Posts: 38 Member
    Another Asian (Chinese) here!
    Read thru the posts and thought I was the only one that suffered the "Fat One" in the group.

    Always been a "fey mui / fat girl" since young and this past Oct. 2012, I just decided to "see" how I would look like if I was skinny.
    Of course all thru the years, at night lying in bed, I will make up my mind and say: "Tomorrow, I need to start." Then hunger takes over in the morning and that little prep talk was totally forgotten.

    My highest weight: 225lbs @ 5'6'' - omg, I was like a freak show when I went back to China, and I wasn't even at my heaviest then (maybe like 190-ish lbs then). Literally everyone in the street was looking at me. They didn't need to speak but just from the expressions on their faces is already enough to let me know what they are thinking. Some have disgust on their faces, some have that weird smile of "I can't believe it!"...some even forces their children riding in the back of the bike to look at me, since I was such a "freak show". I didn't want to go out anymore and if I did/need to go out, I want to go out at night.

    Of course, my families/friends are very critical. My grandmother actually make a gesture behind my back saying how fat I was. My uncle would rolled his eyes and said american kids/me got so fat cause of all the "cheese and hamburgers" we've been consuming (yes, its true, but no need to roll your eyes ya know?!) My female friend told me I was a great catch but because I was fat, that's why I'm single still, especially among Asian men, "cause they rather have a skinny plain-faced girl than a fat girl with a pretty face."
    I think I am numb to all these mockery but still hurts @ the first sting....just the pain doesn't linger as long.

    My current weight now is: 178lbs, working towards 135-140lb, but this time the real reason I'm sticking to it is because I really want to and NOT because all those words and disgusted gestures. Take it day by day.....cause we have our whole lives ahead of us to get to our healthy self! (^_^)
  • geekyjock76
    geekyjock76 Posts: 2,720 Member
    I bought some clothes from Japan (XL shirts (US L) and jeans. Despite getting measurements that were close to what I wear here, the shirts are too tight about the arms, chest, back and shoulders and pants were too tight about the thighs and butt. I plan to live there someday and will likely have to go to a specialty shop since I want to return to 185 lbs at 7% body fat.

    I sympathize for many Asians (both male and especially females) since there seems to be a idolization of thinness which may be ideal there but is not okay with me. Several of my Asian male and female friends who lift get told they are too big by their Asian friends and family despite being considered average sized here. The good thing is, if I find a hot, athletic buff Japanese girl, I'll have a great chance at dating her.
  • AngelsFan91106
    AngelsFan91106 Posts: 111 Member
    Several of my Asian male and female friends who lift get told they are too big by their Asian friends and family despite being considered average sized here. The good thing is, if I find a hot, athletic buff Japanese girl, I'll have a great chance at dating her.

    Whoa buddy, just because an above-95lbs Asian girl has been unfairly told she is fat her entire life, and you happen to disagree with the assessment, does NOT immediately make you Prince Charming to her.
  • im half chinese. My mother (Chinese) was never critical of my body, in fact she was always force feeding me. I did get comments from her Chinese friends though, which really shocked me at first
  • My husband is Asian. I am always trying to get him to eat better. He would eat rice and meat only at every meal...if he could!! We were talking about how much we weighed one night. Naturally, since I am trying to lose weight. He said that he is right at 175, as always. I said no way....you are 190. He doesn't work out or eat well, ya know? He got mad and said, I'll prove it to you, right now!! We walk into the bathroom and he steps on the scale...189!! He went "no way!!" I got a little laugh out of it, only because he is so stubborn:)

    He talked to his mom on the phone after Christmas. I could hear her saying she liked the Christmas card we sent (with a picture of all of us) and she said "you have gained weight!" To which he said "I know, mom" and she kept on til he changed the subject. I felt bad for him.
    So, I guess the guys are just as susceptible to relatives comments when they gain weight.
  • I'm so happy I found this forum! I always felt like such a black sheep because of my chubbiness and even shorter-than-average height, even for an Asian -_- (I'm 4 feet 10 and 126 pounds. Was 140 in November at my heaviest.) It feels great to know that I'm not the only one that feels like this.

    My family immigrated to Canada very early on and they never acted very Asian in the first place so they never really bothered me too much about my weight. My paternal relatives in Korea went a step further: they might comment a little about it from time to time but never in a mean way. I found out from my mom that one of my older male cousins had actually told her that he was worried about my weight but it didn't bother me at all because I could tell he genuinely cared about how I would do in society (even though being overweight is very normal here in Canada, not that he knew that.)

    Then... I felt pretty depressed when I went to China last year and my maternal relatives would comment about my weight in a "joking" way (which totally felt more like bullying to me). It was also totally depressing to see all these beautiful, thin girls around me in China and Korea who could fit into pretty much any clothes at the stores. Many Korean stores that sell inexpensive clothes don't allow you to try anything on and that made me super cautious about what to buy. I also felt extremely self-conscious when talking to the shop keepers, wondering if they thought that I would be too fat to fit into any of their clothes.

    Strangely enough, I ended up wishing my family DID try to talk to me more about my weight. I think the reason why many Asians living in Asian countries stay thin is because there is so much pressure to look that way. It's not that I want my parents to give me so much unhelpful pressure by all means, but it became so easy for me to let go that it would have been nice if they pushed me a bit more when I was young to make healthy eating choices. My paternal relatives gave me just the right amount of push, yet in a way that made me feel like they actually care about my well-being. It's too bad that I didn't ever see them often enough.

    Anyway, I'm more determined than ever to lose enough weight now! I really want to be able to surprise my paternal relatives when they see the new, healthy me (my mean maternal relatives don't deserve that right LOL) because I know they'll be happy FOR me and super proud OF me. I'm going back to Korea this summer and I'm determined to be fit enough to not be self-conscious about shopping or standing out! (Sorry for the wall of text...)
  • BowaBowa
    BowaBowa Posts: 162
    My husband is asian and every time I visited his country I used to get it all the time! They are people that don't mince their words they say it like it is.As we were going out of his auntys house one day instead of saying goodbye,she said lose some weight and slammed the door in my face! So although I am not asian myself I can feel for yas! I have full intentions though of going back to meet that woman and watch her mouth drip to the floor

    I can relate =] Chinese Cantonese here. When I was overweight a 2 years ago, my uncles/aunties had no mercy for me. Now, getting shredded and 60lbs later. I saw one of my aunties for the first time in 18months, she almost fainted and said i'm too skinny now -_-
  • asaxygirl
    asaxygirl Posts: 3 Member
    Another Asian here... Half Japanese, half German. I grew up in Japan with all my cousins. I had curly hair and was fat with big feet! Common nicknames were debu (chubby), daikon ashi (radish legs), and dekka ashi (huge feet). Does a number on a growing girl's psyche. Well, I am chubby now and though I will never be the slender, petite, Japanese woman like my mother, her sisters, and my cousins... I can be fit and short! :)
  • Oh now I feel compelled to reply.

    I hate it when I have traumatic flashbacks to when I lived in Asia. I distinctly recall an experience of a man who jokingly asked if I was related to Buddha because he thought I looked like Buddha--fat happy face, fat round body. Ironically, the speaker looked more like Buddha than I did.

    I am glad I live in America. Even if lots of people still incorrectly think Asians are "genetically thin." ::typed while eating late night snack::

    I struggle with my weight mainly because others do.
  • bloodraynegatito
    bloodraynegatito Posts: 14 Member
    i'm not Asian but i'm 5'4 and trying to lose pregnancy weight and currently 131 but my adopted family are so fat and see me and say..oh you used to be soo skinny.
  • panda2727
    panda2727 Posts: 22 Member
    This forum is great I feel ya sistas! I've never been skinny in comparison to the people that live in the motherland when I was younger. Now it's even worse when age hits and you lose your metabolism. I used to probably be considered chubby in their eyes now I am probably considered obese.

    People don't get to me but I do. I don't feel good about myself anymore. With age and my job I've gained about 50-60lbs.
    It's really hard losing it considering I never used to have to go on any diets or exercise. It's a constant struggle!
  • sayorinaka
    sayorinaka Posts: 2 Member
    Hey=) I totally know what you mean with the whole "skinny asian" stereotype. I was 128lbs as a 5'2.5" asian girl in highschool. And now im around 103lbs and in college. I still have my parents trying to get me to lose weight. Its so hard, especially since all my asian friends are smaller than me (or maybe they wear their weight differently. Since I tend to hold my weight in my thighs). I cant say I lost the 25lbs in a healthy manner exaxtly. But it did take me like 2yrs to lose the weight and keep it off. I also exercised a lot. Like 4-6 times a week when on school break. I have to say I am happier at my lower weight. But its hard with my parents being so health crazy and weight focused. In short I think I mainly cut carbs out of my diet. And drank more liquids. But thats just my two cents=) hope everyone looses however much weight they want to! Peace=D
  • Omg I totally can relate! My Asian friends are all so tiny and I remember one of my friends being asked how much she weighed (she's a little taller than 5'3") and she was like "Oh, 95lbs" as if it were normal! Even though I'm not overweight, I'd still like to lose weight just because I do think I'm a bit flabby/chubby in general. My mom used to comment every single day about how fat I was, and it made me lose my self-esteem for quite a little bit. Right now I think losing weight not only will make me a little more confident on the outside, but it'll also help me feel better about myself.
  • filipina trying to lose weight here.. I think the stereotype goes hand in hand with the fact many asians have smaller frames.. I dunno though.. I just know I don't like being an overweight asian. lol. :)
  • quellybelly
    quellybelly Posts: 827 Member
    Filipina checking in! I was never really overweight, but I'm not "Asian skinny" either. Once I walked into an Asian clothing store in our city's Chinatown. I saw a top I liked and went to ask one of the super slim Asian sales ladies if I could try it on. She eyed me up and down and told me that I wouldn't fit in any clothes in their store :(
  • How did I just come across this thread? I can completely relate to this!

    I've always had a very different body type than all my friends. For starters, I love food and I love to indulge. I'm Korean man, we have amazing food and limitations and portion control aren't really my thing. So I was the fat one in the group. Also, I'm 5'9 which makes me abnormally tall for an Asian girl. Most of my friends are standard 5'4 and shorter. If you need a visual on how I looked next to all my friends, imagine a whale next to a school of small fishes. Because that's exactly what I looked like.

    Growing up, I've always been told how fat I was by my parents, grandparents, parent's friends, etc etc etc. It still happens to this day because my body shape is not exactly the ideal Asian girl body stereotype. I'm pear shaped, my weight goes straight to my *kitten* and hip. I have a small upper body and that's the only thing that somewhat resembles the Asian girl body stereotype. I will never have that stick thin body and I'm fine with it haha as long as I'm healthy, mabruk!

    I never tried to change my body when I was fat (well fatter than current weight). You know, we Asians tend to have strict parents. One wrong move and you "dishonah our famry". So I guess my rebellious teenage self found escape in food. So when someone told me I was fat, my mindset was "WELL LEMME SHOW YOU HOW FAT I CAN BE MOTHER****ER NOM NOM NOM". Yep, wild rebellious teen right hurrr. But the more I ate, the less clothes fit, the stranger I looked next to my friends, and the unhappier I became. So I decided to loose weight. I think being Asian, you're expected to fulfill this stereotypical childlike body because that's what's considered beautiful. For some reason, realistic body types is omitted from the Asian perception of beauty. But I think ignoring that stereotype and just focusing on health and fitness is the way to go. Sorry for the long *kitten* post, I'm on winter break man. I'm bored.
  • As a former overweight Asian kid, I want to add my two cents to this old thread:

    The pressure to be thin can be very intense in an Asian family. One of the reasons that even brought me to this website is because of the constant body scrutiny parents and relatives have put on me through the years. My parents tightly abide by the idea of "family unit mentality" and "saving face in public." If your grades and body are not in tip-top shape, your mediocrity drags the entire family down. My grades were always good, but because I was overweight, I knew I was being talked about by relatives and family friends as the lesser sibling (in comparison to my athletic brother). It's very common for fellow Asian parents to gossip about their children's weight in public (and the comments certainly get meaner behind backs).

    Although I'm slender now, my parents still talk about how to improve my figure. The trauma of being berated about my appearance runs deep. Personally, I no longer have qualms about this since the struggle to overcome my weight has taught me significant life lessons. Sometimes I really appreciate the pressure, but it's hard to distinguish when the advice is for my own health benefit or for more artificial reasons.
  • I'm so happy that I'm not the only one. Growing up I was obese but now after a year... I'm 123 at 5'5 ...it's still kind of big since my sister is 5'8 at like 108lbs but I can never be like her with a thigh gap...she's trying to gain weight...but I was always told that I was fat. My mom was ashamed of taking me out bc her friends would see me and be in so much shock...now I have abs amd crap they said I'm to buff....there is never a good medium...the happy point is that my waist is smaller and firmer than most asians
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