Unhappy at goal weight?

Funny you post this. I was thinking about this the other day. People post how they have 40lbs to lose or whatever. I was thinking, "How do you know?"

I set my "goal" just to give MFP something to work with but I didn't know if losing what I lost will be what I want to see - turns out it wasn't in the end and is irrelevant.

Something else related: would you prefer to be twice as healthy but twice as fat or half as healthy but half your weight? :-D

I am sure that everyone judges themselves at any weight. I think it is even harder for people that are overweight and then loose weight. We still look at ourselves as being the "big girl" and no matter people tell us, we still see something else in the mirror.
We are our own worst critic, but we have to remember to love ourselves because this is the only body we have!!!!

Not that I'm anywhere near my goal yet, but I am currently almost 40lbs from my HW, and have been 25 lbs thinner than I am now, and even at that weight (175lbs-- 65lbs from HW), I didn't LIKE my body any more than I did at my HW. I have this fear that even when I hit GW, I'm going to be disappointed in the shape and proportions of my body. My hips are too wide, my calves have always been trunks, stretch marks and "pooch" from pregnancy that won't budge are all staring at me. This fear grips me and almost makes me want to say, "why bother?" If a 65 lb weight loss didn't help my perception of my body, is another 65 going to make me happy?
Has anyone else experienced this? Anyone get to (or close to) goal and still find that weight hasn't impacted their feelings about their body?

Last spring I was 5 pounds from goal weight. I still didn't feel great about myself and found fault in my body, even though others kept telling me how great I looked. I think for me, it's a self esteem issue, because I've struggled with my self esteem my whole life, while I didn't always struggle with weight. Even when I get to goal weight, I know that I need to change how I think about myself.

I'm in the same boat as you. I still have about 100 pounds to go till my "goal weight" which is somewhere between 150 and 130 but I worry too that after a majority of my life spent overweight and 2 kids I won't have the tiny little sexy body I want, or I think I want. When things like this start creeping in one me, the "why bother?" "Is it worth it?" type thinking, I remind myself that I'm not only doing this to LOOK better but also to FEEL better. And, to me, that is worth more than what I look like at the end. I will be able to run with my kids, be around for my kids, and just generally feel better and stronger. Plus, even if I don't look smokin' in a bikini I heard they were going out of style and there are PLENTY of other tiny clothes I'll be able to rock!

Try not to set your expectations so high. The number of people in this world who are 100% completely and unequivocally happy with their body is about....zero. I've seen people with flat stomachs, perfect arms, etc all talk about their future plans and goals for improvement. Nothing wrong with it - the desire to improve oneself is generally THE defining motivation for their work. Keep it up. If you've got 130lbs total to lose, at the very least you are going to make monstrous improvements in body composition AND in your health. Yeah, loose skin sucks but dying of a heart attack when you're 45 sucks worse. There are no downsides to losing weight like that.

Not that I'm anywhere near my goal yet, but I am currently almost 40lbs from my HW, and have been 25 lbs thinner than I am now, and even at that weight (175lbs-- 65lbs from HW), I didn't LIKE my body any more than I did at my HW. I have this fear that even when I hit GW, I'm going to be disappointed in the shape and proportions of my body. My hips are too wide, my calves have always been trunks, stretch marks and "pooch" from pregnancy that won't budge are all staring at me. This fear grips me and almost makes me want to say, "why bother?" If a 65 lb weight loss didn't help my perception of my body, is another 65 going to make me happy?
Has anyone else experienced this? Anyone get to (or close to) goal and still find that weight hasn't impacted their feelings about their body?

I don't get posts like this. Why don't you just gain all your weight back?

I bet you weren't happy there either. There is nothing we can say or do that will change your body type. The issue isn't your "WEIGHT" people are always chasing a number on a scale. That scale means nothing. You're really chasing a look, not a number. I am pretty sure you would want a nicer physique last time you where lower on your weight. That is done by "RESHAPING" your body, you need resistance training.

She's not complaining, just asking if others feel the same way as she does. As a person who's experienced this, I can completely relate to how she feels. You don't relate to it, and that's ok, but you don't need to belittle someone for asking for support. And, no, it doesn't make me personally want to gain the weight back. It makes me want to get not only physically healthy, but emotionally healthy so I change how I perceive my body.:flowerforyou:

I've lost 30. I'm not impressed so far. I'll just have to see what it looks like the nearer I get to goal. Good luck! *HUGS*

My goal was to get about 10 pounds away from what I thought was my goal and figure out what my real goal was. My real goal had nothing to do with that the scale says and everything to do with how I feel, and what I want to look like that is perfectly reasonable for my body. I'm 5'3" so I'm never going to have the legs of a 6' tall model, but I can be strong and lean. My goal became to move faster, be stronger, live happier, and eat cheeseburgers once a week.

P.S. And to the OP, no I have not felt any more confident about my body and how it looks at 135 (lowest weight) than 235 (highest weight). So, find confidence through using your body instead of looking at it.

I know how you feel...I am about 13 pounds from my goal and I still do not like the way I look naked. I look good in clothing now, but when I look at myself nude, I still have all of the same wobbly bits and cellulite, I am just a smaller version of that. That being said, instead of letting it get me down, I'm now going to focus mainly on weights and building muscle because I think that is the way to really firm up those areas. I hope to see the results I want, and I hope you do too!

Also, we're always going to find flaws in ourselves. Try to focus on the good and on all of your accomplishments. Tell yourself every day one thing you LIKE about yourself (whether it's a body part or a character trait)

Before and after pictures help!

I know I won't be thrilled with myself at my goal, but I will be healthier and much better off than before I started.

Like was already mentioned...no one looks in the mirror and loves what they see...ok narcissus did...lol...but regular people all have flaws.

My problem is that when I was heavier, I thought I looked pretty good for a fat person. Now I think I look bad for a normal person. Ugh. I'm working on it...along with everything else. You can do it too!

Hello All! Go ahead and laugh if you like....I was watching the start of the newest Biggest Loser season this week, and though I disagree with MANY things about this "reality" (HA!) show, this week really put a label (for me) on the weight loss journey, or really what I call a healthy lifestyle journey. Basically, they were talking about the first week contestants are on the ranch, they not only have to endure physical 'giants' of pushing themselves and the pain from muscle overload. They are also faced with the emotional and psychological 'giants' that have kept them making the health choices they have made all their lives. These contestants are forced to face their 'giants' in a fire and brimstone fashion (for our viewing pleasure?!) We normal people at home, walking this health journey without the benefits (and negatives) of the BL ranch - are not forced to face our 'giants'. We have to CHOOSE to do so. Not an easy choice to make. Not an easy thing to do, especially when most of feel like we are suffering physically via denial of eating, and possibly pushing ourselves to exercise.

So, I agree with the others that said self-esteem is important. Ask yourself "WHY am I doing this?" Write down your answers. Then take an honest look at your answers. Which ones might fall into the category of 'materialistic', e.g. look good to others, sexy body, look good in a bikini, etc. (I am not saying these are negative. In and of themselves, they are not.) Which ones might fall into the "spiritual" category, e.g. I want to feel good about myself, I want to improve my health so I have energy and as long a life possible to be with my spouse, children, family. Recognize which things you wrote down are the ones with the most control over your health journey decisions. How much control do these items have? Do you need outside help dealing with some of them, to reduce their control? Maybe some outside counseling is what you need to go along with your eating and exercise plan - to help you find balance in your life overall. Some may not need counseling at all, some may need it for a short time in order to learn some new tools, others may need it more long-term as a main support on their health journey. There is NO SHAME in seeking counseling for yourself. Rather it is a sign of strength, to do so - realizing something(s) may be controlling you in an unhealthy way, and taking steps to break those chains.

Lastly, for me, my health journey is a faith aspect to the spiritual side of my journey. Do you practice any religion? Try returning your focus to your religious faith as you walk your health journey. I am a Christian, and practice Catholicism. My faith practices are KEY elements in the success of my health journey.

Thank you for your courage to share what you are going through. you reached out for outside help! Way to go! Hopefully you are finding support for yourself. You have also gifted others, experiencing the same issues, with support for themselves, through your sharing here. God Bless!