Absolutely livid at husband!

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  • Danni1585
    Danni1585 Posts: 250 Member
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    Stay on the diet, if he comments tell him he lacks the understanding that you have from MFP, dont get mad get healthy XX
  • dmpizza
    dmpizza Posts: 3,321 Member
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    Sorry for your situation. He sounds like a tool.

    All I can say is, keep up the good work, as long as you understand when the hunger is " fake".
  • Lalasharni
    Lalasharni Posts: 353 Member
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    I assume your hubby doesnt have a weight problem then? If if he does, maybe he resents your commitment - let me know.
    You are losing weight for yourself, not for anyone else. If you feel that you need to eat late, then eat late. I understand the effects of certain medications - my husband is a diabetic and his medication gives him (sometimes VERY unpleasant) gas. We make light of it - whilst I reach for the gas-mask LOL
    Humor aside, I think your partner is threatened by your attempts to make your body fitter, healthier and dare I say it (more attractive).
    Its hard when you dont have a supportive partner and you are right to be livid. I suggest you show him the comments that you are building up here. If you cant tell him to zip it and support you, then we will!! You can add me as a friend if you want a little extra support on your side! XXXXXXXX
  • stephd5238
    stephd5238 Posts: 16 Member
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    Prove him wrong!

    This!! I love this!!
  • skinnyinnotime
    skinnyinnotime Posts: 4,141 Member
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    It's hardly bullying. Tbh a pack of crisps isn't going to fill you up on so few calories you should be eating more nutritional food. It's upto you whether you give up or carry on, don't use your husband as an excuse.
  • BossReyes
    BossReyes Posts: 117 Member
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    Even though it might have sounded bad, you should focus on the quality of your food. It's ok to have a "good" meal every once in a while but you'll start to notice as losing weight goes on that you're going to feel amazing when you eat a lot healthier.


    Edit
    skinnyinnotime, why do you post at the same time with the same message? Gosh, making me look late to the party! ;) lol
  • fiberartist219
    fiberartist219 Posts: 1,865 Member
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    Tell him that

    A) you didn't ask for advice

    and

    B) you saved up the calories for it.

    I'm sure he does want to help. You can't blame the fact that you didn't eat on him though. You chose not to eat the chips because you were embarrassed about it. He can say whatever he wants, but at the end of the day, you are the one that chooses when, how, and what to feed yourself. You're an adult, and you do not need his permission or approval to select food and eat it.
  • gogoyubarino
    gogoyubarino Posts: 104 Member
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    Your husband made a stupid comment- people do that at times and you have to learn to live with it.
    Your medication makes you hungry at night but you are adding another layer of issues to the problem by linking emotions to your food consumption.

    It sounds as if you have thought about it with respect to saving calories and things. Just carry on with it and learn to deal with the negative emotions that will come your way when someone makes a comment.


    Oh .. and low fat crisps? What kind of rubbish is that? Eat something healthy instead.
  • seamatt
    seamatt Posts: 199 Member
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    Wow some of the stuff about emotional abuse posted is extreme.


    Personally I think they best way to have proceeded would have been to have talked. What you should have said in my humble opinion is the following........

    "I knew I wanted to have some of these 'diet' crisps tonight, so have worked extra hard today to ensure that I had enough calories left to have this treat and still remain under my calorie goal' #Take crisps off shelf and eat them

    "Wow that was nice, and I am still under my goal for today, great! Don't know if they were really worth the amount of calories they cost as I still feel hungry, but hey I am still under my goal and live and learn"

    "Fancy watching a film?".........and so on
  • skinnyinnotime
    skinnyinnotime Posts: 4,141 Member
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    Even though it might have sounded bad, you should focus on the quality of your food. It's ok to have a "good" meal every once in a while but you'll start to notice as losing weight goes on that you're going to feel amazing when you eat a lot healthier.


    Edit
    skinnyinnotime, why do you post at the same time with the same message? Gosh, making me look late to the party! ;) lol
    Lol it's usually me that posts too slow!
  • morf13
    morf13 Posts: 151 Member
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    It's a fine lone between being supportive and being a drag to somebody that is on a diet.
  • LisaAvasNana
    LisaAvasNana Posts: 82 Member
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    Your doing this for YOU. I am an emotional eater so when my hubby starts acting up I have learned to ignore him. Walk away and take the crisps with you. I tell him I love him but he is not helping me any. Tell him how you want him to help you either by do you really want to eat that, is that something that you should have,or by not saying anything at all it's your choice. I told my hubby that I was serious about losing weight, I finally sign up for this site after a year of debating, and so here I am and really excited. I'm not going to let him sabotage me. The day before I started (I told him I'm starting tomorrow) he made tapioca pudding. HOMEMADE! My favorite. I had a small bowl and that was that. Now he is watching his calories and I shouldn't have any worries.

    Good Luck. We are on this journey together.
    Lisa
  • WeighingAround
    WeighingAround Posts: 3 Member
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    maybe you should let him read this article (about things not to say to people on a diet):

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/08/09/worst-things-to-say-lose-weight_n_1757815.html#slide=1350913

    ...and remind him that you want to be your own diet police and don't need any extra monitoring and you are more than well aware of what you are eating!

    I can relate to this situation very well - sometimes the other person really doesn't realize what they are saying really isn't helping....

    good luck and remember to do what YOU think is best - the results will show! :)
  • irishblonde2011
    irishblonde2011 Posts: 618 Member
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    Hey

    Aw sorry your upset hun,big hugs!!!
    I don't really think it is bullying as you call it. Maybe he just said the wrong thing at the wrong time.
    I say the wrong stuff on a good day ;)
    Make it about you & not what about others think or say..
    Good luck on your journey x
  • dansls1
    dansls1 Posts: 309 Member
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    Does he know what your plan is for calories and how you are saving them for the evening? This sounds an aweful lot like a communication issue, not bullying.
  • Hendrix7
    Hendrix7 Posts: 1,903 Member
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    I think you, and most of the posters in the thread, are over reacting.

    This is not 'emotional abuse'
  • Purple_Night
    Purple_Night Posts: 16 Member
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    He sounds jealous, is he overweight and doing nothing about his weight?
  • zombie_porno
    zombie_porno Posts: 199 Member
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    Why are the forums always full of people making excuses for crappy people by saying "he was probably trying to help"? The INTENT does not matter one bit. The result is that he said something stupid & petty & it caused pain. He is accountable for his actions & words, regardless of how he meant them. Just like the OP is responsible for allowing him to take away her joy & motivation.

    OP, you are stronger than his petty BS. Stay strong, prove him wrong, & learn to honestly tell him when he's being a bully. You're on the right track. Don't let his stupid words ruin that! xo
  • lambchoplewis
    lambchoplewis Posts: 797
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    He is jealous - prove him wrong. I know it is hard to ignore but... it would be great to do this for a couple of months and lose weight. I started my weight loss 9 months ago when I was sick of listening to girlfriends talk about cleanses, diet plans with pills and a lot of cost. I decided not to say anything and just do it. I did not see some of these women for a few months and voila - I had lost some weight and they did not.

    Fortunately, my hubby supports me but the proof will stop yours!!
  • sunlover89
    sunlover89 Posts: 436 Member
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    It's hardly bullying. Tbh a pack of crisps isn't going to fill you up on so few calories you should be eating more nutritional food. It's upto you whether you give up or carry on, don't use your husband as an excuse.

    ^^ this. "Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent" - Eleanor Roosevelt.

    Toughen up, there are always going to be unhelpful people out there making snide comments, it's your choice whether they affect you or not. It was your choice to go to bed hungry and mope about it. I personally ask my partner to say stuff like that, helps me keep on track! Ditch the low cal crisps with NO helpful nutrition, have some fruit and veggies instead!

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