Absolutely livid at husband!

My husband says dumb things. He doesn't have the same problems I do and he is actually trying to gain weight right now. I had a frank conversation with him and told him I don't think he understands how hard it is for me and the best way he can support me is to not say anything. I have found myself sneaking food because I don't want him to see me, but that is not right. I think we are at an understanding now. Hopefully you can talk to your husband and he will understand.

You have already lost 3 lbs -- WAY TO GO!!! So please don't quit. Perhaps you could use a little bit of sarcasm on him. "You know, I have lost 3 lbs. How many have you lost?" And then keep on going, to prove him wrong.

Oh wait, I see you just posted a note saying he apologized & offered you a peace offering. Although chocolate probably wasn't the best choice, it's a start.

The next time he sounds critical, perhaps you could give him some good suggestions of how he can best help you. You might also want to explain how you're doing your diet. He may be unaware that you eat most of your calories in the evening.

I'm sure your husband wants you to meet your goal but he is going around it the wrong way. Let him know that in order for you to be successful you need his support. When your on a diet and you have a partner, they need to be your cheer leader. Maybe he doesn't know that you are counting calories and there are so many calories you need to consume in a day. Sit down with him and show him your plan, maybe once you explain it to him he will be a better support.
If that doesn't work then do what CherokeeBabe said.......just kidding.....communication is key, sit down and explain your process to your husband...Hope this helps and keep up the good work your doing great.....

My long term partner was a little suspicious of my plan at first. I didn't feel like going into a lengthy explanation of my plan and goals, because I know things will change as I progress. I'm making a huge life change. I don't need to be a size 0 but I do need to be healthy. So I went to the store, bought healthy items, bought vegetables and fruits. He curiously came along and questioned choices. I answered.
Two days later he came home with a crate of vegetables (not even all the 'right' kind) and a juicer saying "Honey, I have your solution!" I thanked him since, once he bought the appropriate vegetables and fruits, it will be a great way to add more servings of fruit and vegetables to our diet. BUT I'm not interested in some fad diet of drinking only juice for several weeks. I want to learn how to live healthy every day while still enabling myself to enjoy life -so far, so good-
Then a few days after that, I joined a gym. I was tired of the bickering about what equipment to get at home and where to put it. (Keep in mind, he's never been on a diet or worked out to work out). I put my foot down, said "this is for me" and joined a wonderful gym just down the road. That seemed to irritate the hell out of him. Suddenly he was all, "You're wasting money, you won't go, blah blah." I turned my head, flashed him my 'your five seconds away from death' look and said evenly, "Do NOT turn into your mother right now..."
His mother has quite the history of questioning every purchase or thing he has done. She always assumes failure. Well, my comment took him back and really forced him to think about what he had said. The next day, he was a completely different man. He wanted to know real information about my gym and my plan. And, when I come home he asks, "Are you doing the gym tonight? What should I make for dinner?" He's now my supportive partner and joining the journey. :flowerforyou:
(I also promised I'd walk around in the nude more often when I had my self-esteem back, that motivates a man pretty well too) :laugh:

Lesson of this long story: Sometimes the guy is a jerk (I almost married one ages ago) and sometimes they just don't realize the extent of what they're doing. Sometimes you have to take a calming breath, give them something to think about and hope they realize. But throughout it all, remind yourself that this is for YOU! YOU CAN DO IT, YOU WILL GET THERE, YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR LIFE.

Set yourself mini-goals along the way and as you achieve each of those, you'll start to feel more motivated and more powerful. Hell, make yourself a chart if you need one. And, when you need to vent or need extra support, we're all here too.

Just remember, you are doing this for YOU! no one else. SO you feel healthy, and better about yourself. Don't let anyone take that from you. My bf is pretty similar but I know he is really just trying to help me and I can be difficult when I want something. They think that if you have any type of snack, you are falling off your course. We know that is not always true. I have to point out the nutrition on the back and explain to him sometimes and then he realizes, Oh I see! and now lays off. He only gets on me if I eat bad things now... but will say... don't do it! don't do it! in a funny way. It doesn't make me mad anymore. He needs to find a way to say things so you don't get offended, and WHEN to say them most importantly. Don't give up!

I am a guy and I am from MARS! We are not real bright most of the time. Cuff him up side of the head. He will thank you for it later

I understand exactly what your going through. I would be eating cereal and my father would be pointing at the bowl and saying to much to much. It it truly is to much then why have I lost 36 LBS since September 1st.

You don't need your husband's approval before you eat something.

Perfectly stated. Ignore him COMPLETELY when he mentions anything about your eating. If it fits into you goals, go ahead and have it. YOU know what fits and what doesn't better than he does, so disregard his "help".

Side note, instead of reaching for low cal crisps as a snack, grab a handful of carrots and hummus, or a banana or an apple. That would be even less calories that those crisps, and would almost guaranteed keep you full longer.

You did put the crisps down and not eat them didn't you?

So... it worked.

If you have calories left to spare, you can simply say that it's within your allowance for today.

One of the weird things about telling people that we're trying to lose weight is that it somehow instantly turns them into an expert. They judge every single thing we put into our mouths, and look at every bite rather than a whole day or week or the results we're getting.

And men tend to be suppportive in a different way than women (although women can be godawful mean about this kind of thing as well). Take a breath, and keep going.