Feeling Insecure at the Gym

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  • elprincipito
    elprincipito Posts: 1,200 Member
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    tip number 1:
    no one cares how you look. They might stare at you like they might stare at anyone else.
  • emandrews1988
    emandrews1988 Posts: 4 Member
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    Don't feel that way, I just joined a gym a few weeks ago and there are larger people there who could put my to shame while beside me on the elliptical, and I have no problem going for 30 mins straight :) And also, since I am new to the gym I feel the same way you do, like I am sticking out and all these "fit" people are looking at me funny, but I'm starting to think it may all be in my head since realistically I look no different then them.

    Anyways just give it time, after a few weeks you will be very comfortable in the gym and won't think about it. You may be feeling weird since it's all so new. Get some headphones and drown everyone out :)
  • kimad
    kimad Posts: 3,010 Member
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    I know how you feel, I really do.

    You also have to consider that some of those people who look liked 'God' started where you did as well. I have come along way and sometimes I wish more people would know that.

    Another thought, is your gym have a female only section? that may help. It took me awhile to feel comfortable in the co-ed and even then I only do classes at this gym and have to walk past the men lol

    ETA: I also agree just to worry about yourself and getting healthy. If someone is staring at you, they are weird. I don't sit at the gym staring at someone unless they are texting on a machine I want and not using it lol
  • nitrogen_widget
    nitrogen_widget Posts: 92 Member
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    I felt the same way when I first started lifting.
    And I was working out at home!
  • bluecrayonz
    bluecrayonz Posts: 459 Member
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    Whenever I see a "big" person at a gym, male or female, (and there are plenty) I always have major respect for them, since I know how hard that can be. Without a doubt they are the bravest in the place.

    If I see them there often, then I know they are the strongest, toughest most focused, most dedicated person in the place.

    So there!

    (ps: they probably are not looking at you as much as you think they are. Observe, they may be giving everyone a glance who walks through he door. additionally, a good percentage of those "perfect bodies" were likely to be overweight at some point and were in the same boat you are.

    Do not let this cause you to deviate from your goals. You're stronger than this.

    i feel the same way. When a really heavy person is working at it just as hard as all the regular sized people at the gym i'm like "wwow that's strength"
  • _LA_
    _LA_ Posts: 111
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    That's funny - I started at Planet Fitness a couple of days ago, and I was reading all the signage about being a 'judgment free zone' and all that, and I thought back to all of the gyms I've belonged to over the years - and how I never even notice the other people there unless they are using a machine I'm waiting for - so if there WAS anyone looking funny at me, I never noticed. I think most people are in their own worlds, though I suppose people-watching types must go to the gym, too. I downloaded Pandora onto my new smartphone and started a Gwen Stefani station, then added Shakira, and I plug in my earbuds and I'm in the zone. So I have to second the person who advised getting lost in some music while you're working out there :)
  • lveh8lve
    lveh8lve Posts: 162 Member
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    Honestly no one really pays attention at my gym to anything. If someone is staring it's normally because they are just focusing. Normally I'm too focused on my workout to really care about anyone else (as long as they aren't in my way) or what they are doing. Sometimes I do look at the male eye candy though. Or I will watch for form to improve myself. Today I was doing pushups with the exercise ball (can't do regular YET) and a guy said to me "Great effort". It really meant alot to me!
  • JoeHomoski
    JoeHomoski Posts: 10 Member
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    I was nervous about going to the gym I had paid for for 4 years also...Planet Fitness. Everyone either keeps to themselves or encourages and is quick to show you how to use the equipment. Congrats for walking in, and thanks for saying what I think a lot of us have felt.
  • cgullmom
    cgullmom Posts: 4 Member
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    I felt the same way when I started going over a year ago. I stuck it out, with the help of a couple of gym buddies and am glad I did. It was funny, how I would see the same people every day and only a couple of them would speak to me, giving me encouragement to keep up the good work. Then once I started losing weight and others could tell, those same people that I saw daily, who never spoke to me, were coming up to me asking if I had lost weight and how good I looked. I speak to all, but the ones I talk to are the ones who saw me when I was "invisible" and 70+ pounds heavier! Keep up the good work...it will pay off in the end!
  • sarahrbraun
    sarahrbraun Posts: 2,261 Member
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    I went to the gym the other day, for the first time in my entire life, with the mindset of getting fit and healthy. With almost 100 lbs to lose to get in a healthy BMI, I'm a pretty big girl. But when I got to the gym, I felt super self conscious! There were literally NO overweight people in there...everyone had a body like a God and were easing through their workouts. They gave me weird looks and I became super self aware of my every movement. I felt like everyone was looking at my red, sweaty face, listening to me being out of breath.

    So today, I went out and bought some nice work out clothes and a sportsbra (desperately needed) in the hopes that looking more like a gym rat will help me feel like I fit in.

    Any tips on feeling more comfortable while trying to work out around others?

    *P.S. I can't change gyms at the moment, I have a free membership to this gym and cannot afford a different one.

    try not to worry about it. Learn to laugh at yourself a little.( by learn to laugh, I mean poke a little fun at yourself. I crack jokes about my height or being *old*--especially when talking to the trainer who is 15 years younger and 10 inches taller than I am)

    I was morbidly obese when I started at the Y in February last year. I saw all these pretty people in there, and felt similar to the way you feel right now. I started taking my kindle with me and reading a book while I sweated buckets walking on the treadmill. Every once in a while someone would say something--like the day the trainer smiled and cracked a (good natured) joke as I was dripping sweat

    Then after about 4 months or so of going in there, something happened. This huge muscled black guy approached me to tell me that he had noticed how often I was in, and that I was doing a great job. Then 2 older ladies I helped with the treadmills told me THEY had noticed ( from the pool area they were usually in ) how dedicated I had been ...then the trainer and the fitness monitor commented on how regular I was. Every time I got down about not thinking I had been making much progress, someone would come up and tell me how they noticed me working HARD on the machines. I thought I was going to cry the day a lady who is recovering from a STROKE walked by smiling and commented to the trainer " she's doing real good and making awesome progress, isn't she?"

    After 11 months now, I kinda feel like the Y is my family. I know a few people by name, I nag the old guy who is supposed to be on oxygen but doesn't like to wear it, and he picks on me back. The front desk guy calls me by name. The trainer and fitness monitor chat with me, check my form without my asking, and joke with me.
  • Jillian130
    Jillian130 Posts: 174 Member
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    Don't pay any mind to those around you. They are all there for the same reason to be healthy and get fit. Don't forget they all started at some point too, and likely some were at the same starting point as you. We are all our biggest critics and we all tend to make more out of a situation than it really is. I have found that people have a lot of respect for those that come into a gym with a lot of weight to lose. It shows that you are ready to take back control of your life, and that your there to get healthy. Most of the people are there to workout, not socialize. So go ahead and focus on your workout, not on the people around you. And above all, enjoy it and be proud of yourself. You deserve to be healthy!
  • rgohm
    rgohm Posts: 294 Member
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    I have about 120 lbs to lose and I feel shy when I go to the gym. I just put on my ipod and listen to my workout music and get "into" the zone. I am sure it only feels like people are staring at you, I figure even if they are staring at me, I am there for myself not for them. I am the only one who can make myself healthy and going to the gym is part of that journey. Just try to focus on yourself and enjoy the workouts. Good Luck!!
  • aalpass
    aalpass Posts: 124 Member
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    I have 2 tshirts one says "I'm in shape... round is a shape" and another one that says "Work in Progress" I wear those when I'm feeling particularly insecure.

    I LOVE this!! haha
  • syrklc
    syrklc Posts: 172 Member
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    I went to the gym the other day, for the first time in my entire life, with the mindset of getting fit and healthy. With almost 100 lbs to lose to get in a healthy BMI, I'm a pretty big girl. But when I got to the gym, I felt super self conscious! There were literally NO overweight people in there...everyone had a body like a God and were easing through their workouts. They gave me weird looks and I became super self aware of my every movement. I felt like everyone was looking at my red, sweaty face, listening to me being out of breath.

    So today, I went out and bought some nice work out clothes and a sportsbra (desperately needed) in the hopes that looking more like a gym rat will help me feel like I fit in.

    Any tips on feeling more comfortable while trying to work out around others?

    *P.S. I can't change gyms at the moment, I have a free membership to this gym and cannot afford a different one.

    That is so rude and sorry you had that experience. Not all gyms are that way. Maybe take a friend with you and maybe you will be more comfortable.
  • jerbear1962
    jerbear1962 Posts: 1,157 Member
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    I know it's hard to go into the gym full of god like creatures and feel out of place. I'm much bigger too, I know that I will one day look like them and know I will embrace anyone new that comes in. I right now just go do what I need to do and sweat with my red face. Do what you need to do. Do it well...Good luck and keep us informed.
  • Iceman420
    Iceman420 Posts: 195
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    I went to the gym the other day, for the first time in my entire life, with the mindset of getting fit and healthy. With almost 100 lbs to lose to get in a healthy BMI, I'm a pretty big girl. But when I got to the gym, I felt super self conscious! There were literally NO overweight people in there...everyone had a body like a God and were easing through their workouts.

    I feel your pain. There are only a few big people in my gym, and I am the biggest guy there. The other 95% are in perfect shape. Thankfully they are respectful. As others have said, focus on yourself. Everyone in that gym should be glad you are trying to get in shape. That is why gym's exist in the first place!
  • slepygrl
    slepygrl Posts: 249 Member
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    I don't think people really care what you look like at the gym. What people do care about is if you are using the equipment correctly. Are you just sitting on a popular piece, that pisses people off!
    Remember this feeling. In a few months you will look like everyone else. And when you see a new person who may resemble what you used to look like walks in the gym. Make them feel welcome.
  • storytelinor
    storytelinor Posts: 245 Member
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    I've been looked at funny by at least one person in every gym I've ever attended, and my overly-critical brain inflates that to, like, ten people! (and they were probably looking at me funny because I'm super short and always walk everywhere like I'm on a mission to save the world!)

    But here's what I do: smile. Smile at someone you think is judging you. Smile to someone who looks sad, or frustrated with their own progress. And for god's sake, smile to yourself while doing your workout! Aside from all the scientific proof that just the act of smiling makes you a healthier person, you should be smiling because you are doing amazing things with your body and your life.
  • ximills
    ximills Posts: 37 Member
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    I feel insecure to, but for different reasons. I really don't like the thread on here that is all about judging people at the gym. Pay attention to what you're doing, meeting your goals, feeling good and having fun!
  • MinisterTom
    MinisterTom Posts: 108 Member
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    Just focus on yourself, forget everyone else in the gym, remember why you are there, and that it is highly likely that at least a few of them were once where you are now.

    ^^This
    Forget about what anyone thinks, you are not there for them, you are there for yourself. I felt the same way at 350 pounds. It only lasted a couple times.

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