Presentation on hot topic To Spank or Not To Spank
Replies
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I'm disappointed, I was expecting something entirely different.
This.0 -
To provide a serious answer..........
As a child, my mother would beat me, in the form of a spanking of course. The spanking was administered using a wide leather belt on a bare bottom. A number of times my father would pull her off of me. When my father wasn't around, use your imagination. My last "spanking" was at 15. At that point in my life I refused to give her the satisfaction of screaming or crying. I took the beating without making a sound.
I also endured numerous instances of slaps across the face.
This is NOT spanking.
I did spank my children using my bare hand. A spanking was for a serious offense. I would first let my child know that they were going to be spanked, and the reason for the spanking. Then a couple of swats on the rear........while clothed........ and that was it. The spanking was more for shock value than to inflict pain.
The last time my four got spanked, all at the same time, they each put a book in their pants which I discovered after the first swat. We all laughed, and that was it. No more spankings.
Should a child be spanked. Yes, I think there is a time when this is appropriate. Should a child be slaped across the face? Never!!.......... beaten.............NEVER!!!! Regarding punishment, regardless of the form, the child should be told why they are being punished.0 -
I was spanked.......
last weekend.
Link to the video....anyone want it?0 -
For those disappointed on the actual topic of this thread, you need to go to Fetlife.com0
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I did spank my children using my bare hand. A spanking was for a serious offense. I would first let my child know that they were going to be spanked, and the reason for the spanking. Then a couple of swats on the rear........while clothed........ and that was it. The spanking was more for shock value than to inflict pain.
The last time my four got spanked, all at the same time, they each put a book in their pants which I discovered after the first swat. We all laughed, and that was it. No more spankings.
Should a child be spanked. Yes, I think there is a time when this is appropriate. Should a child be slaped across the face? Never!!.......... beaten.............NEVER!!!! Regarding punishment, regardless of the form, the child should be told why they are being punished.
Seriously, though, I'm all about this ^^^0 -
For those disappointed on the actual topic of this thread, you need to go to Fetlife.com
Oh I think enough people here belong to both. For some there's no difference between the two.0 -
For those disappointed on the actual topic of this thread, you need to go to Fetlife.com
Oh I think enough people here belong to both. For some there's no difference between the two.
That's probably true Brett, but at least on Fetlife it's censor-free!0 -
For those disappointed on the actual topic of this thread, you need to go to Fetlife.com
Oh I think enough people here belong to both. For some there's no difference between the two.
That's probably true Brett, but at least on Fetlife it's censor-free!
yes but fetlife isn't work friendly....0 -
Was spanked as a kid, but have never spanked my own. From my own experience, I figured out that if I was afraid to get hit, others would too and started using it on my brothers to try to get my way. With my daughter, time outs and speaking with a tone that's "angry" has seemed to work well and we end up communicating better.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
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Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
For those disappointed on the actual topic of this thread, you need to go to Fetlife.com
Oh I think enough people here belong to both. For some there's no difference between the two.
That's probably true Brett, but at least on Fetlife it's censor-free!
yes but fetlife isn't work friendly....
True, but that's what my smartphone is for0 -
I never once spanked either of my two boys. However, that was probably because my wife was against it. Philosophically, I believe that spanking -- on the bottom -- is much less traumatic than other forms of punishment, that generally, intentionally or not, involve shaming or play on the emotions or psyche. A spanking is simple and direct. It gets the message across -- and I think kids need limits and direction -- and it is over right away. Then you and the child can move on.
I agree that too often people spank when they are angry, and/or get carried away, and obviously I do not support that. But, if it were me in the kids shoes, I would rather get a quick spanking and get it over with, than get berated with hurtful words, or to have something I wanted taken away.0 -
I was spanked as a child, punished, grounded, you name it. I will do the same to my Son.0
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I'm disappointed, I was expecting something entirely different.
:drinker: Me too.0 -
I would always try taking away a privaledge first. If they are naughty would be no tv for the night or no popsicles or desert after supper for the night. But if it was something where they could physically cause themself harm like they try to run out in a busy parking lot or street or something then I will give them a spanking and tell them its not ok to do that. But that is the only time would ever give them a spanking. Only when it is something that could cause physical harm to them or someone else. If they are just acting up or being a bit bratty would just take away a privaledge instead.0
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My Son gets crib time or time in his playpen when he gets out of hand.
The other day I caught him trying to sit on our dachshund, again!0 -
I'm disappointed, I was expecting something entirely different.
This.
It never occurred to me when I clicked on the topic that you'd be talking about children.0 -
I do not feel that mild forms of corporal punishment are child abuse.0
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I did spank my children using my bare hand. A spanking was for a serious offense. I would first let my child know that they were going to be spanked, and the reason for the spanking. Then a couple of swats on the rear........while clothed........ and that was it. The spanking was more for shock value than to inflict pain.
The last time my four got spanked, all at the same time, they each put a book in their pants which I discovered after the first swat. We all laughed, and that was it. No more spankings.
Should a child be spanked. Yes, I think there is a time when this is appropriate. Should a child be slaped across the face? Never!!.......... beaten.............NEVER!!!! Regarding punishment, regardless of the form, the child should be told why they are being punished.
Seriously, though, I'm all about this ^^^
So am I... I was spanked too. My mother did swat me accross the face if I mouthed off and I TOTALLY deserved it! I still wish she would come up here (she's 5'2 and I'm 5'7) and smack me in the mouth for being such a mouthly b*tch sometimes... an I'm 30 years old!
If people dont' want to spank their kids, all the power to them. I on the other hand, don't have kids - yet. My parents raised my brother and I and spanked us when we were out of line and I was definitely out of line beating up my brother as a kid and swearing at a young age. If I didn't listen, my parents would put me in my room for a 'time out'. When I decided to steal gum balls, my dad made me go back into the store and apologize and I got a slap on the hand when we got home and another 'time out'. My parents were very reasonable with me, but, when I deserved it (and I DID), I got what I deserved!0 -
*kitten* is about to get real frucked up in this b!tch.0
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Oh, I see. Some people are feigning disappointment that the topic has nothing to do with spanking as a form of derivation of sexual pleasure. They were hoping to let others see how "naughty" they are. How droll.0
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Oh, I see. Some people are feigning disappointment that the topic had to do with spanking as a form of derivation of sexual pleasure. They were hoping to let others see how "naughty" they are. How droll.
I do say, good sir! What a perfectly plebeian post we have found ourselves in!0 -
Personally I think spanking introduces fear and hostility. I prefer to stick to grounding, sitting in the corner for 5 minutes or losing privileges like having toys in the room, tv time and being able to eat anywhere other than the kitchen table.
I think consequences work much better than spanking, but that certainly is just me.0 -
Oh, I see. Some people are feigning disappointment that the topic had to do with spanking as a form of derivation of sexual pleasure. They were hoping to let others see how "naughty" they are. How droll.0
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Oh, I see. Some people are feigning disappointment that the topic had to do with spanking as a form of derivation of sexual pleasure. They were hoping to let others see how "naughty" they are. How droll.
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Yes, I think it is important to spank your child, but you must do it right and in love. Starting at one years old or so. You have a paddle such as a wooden spoon, do not use your hand. At that young of an age, a soft smack on the behind only, increasing it just a little as the child gets older, no marks should be left, so don't spank to hard, just enought to get your point acrossed and only a few swats, two per say. Prior to spanking your child, you should talk to your child and explain, asking did you do something wrong? Have the child say what it was. Tell the child that they have to have a spanking. Make sure they understand totally before going thru with it. Then after the swat, give you child a hug and tell them you love them and ask again, do you know why I had to spank you? Hug them again. When you use your hand, its personal so try to have one object to use and only on the bottom. I think spankings should stop by puberty. then its time to take things away for a short time such as cell phones, ipods, i pads etc.. One last thing, don't ever spank in anger, walk away first then once you are calm then do the correction. Never spank in anger. And no, spankings shouldn't have anything to do with race. Not every punishment should end in a spanking, sometime a talking too helps or a time out. Really should depend on the crime. Always do punish kids in love and not anger. No need to cuss at them either. Kind words work best.0
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I believe I'm living proof that spanking works. I had a very healthy respect and fear for my Father at a young age because I knew the consequences of acting out. As for my Mother, she NEVER spanked us and when I was with her I was a holy terror. My parents are divorced (since I was 4) and it was like night and day when I was at my mom's versus dad's. At dad's I knew how to behave myself and be respectful to people and play without being a terror. At my mom's I would be a complete brat and get in fights with my brother all the time.
ETA: My father didn't just haul off and whip me. It was planned and was an entire experience. First it was, "Go to your room." Then I had time to sit there and stew over what I had done and what the punishment was going to be (and usually time for me to put on about three pairs of sweatpants). Then he would come in with his paddle (yes, wooden paddle) and talk to me for a few minutes about what I did and why it was wrong and why I was being punished for it. So, what I'm saying is I believe there is a right and wrong way to spank because I have seen parents just haul off and whack their kids and the kids just laugh in their face. This isn't the way to spank a child.
But I honestly believe the key to any good punishment is consistency. If you don't consistently spank or follow through with threats then don't expect the child to behave.0 -
I'm disappointed, I was expecting something entirely different.
Same. LOL No for the kids, yes for me!
In all honestly, I just prefer to use other methods for my kids. They are very well behaved and respectful all without the threat of spanking.0 -
How do you feel about spanking your child?Do you feel that it's an apropriate punishment in this day and age?At what age do you feel the child should move on to other type of punishment?Do you feel that race plays a part in spanking?Do you think the rate/importance of spanking has gone down in the present generation as compared to the older generations?Do you feel that children's behavior now days has changed as a result of parents being scared to spank their child?Were you spanked as a child and do not spank your own kids and why/why not?
It is important to note that many people do not properly distinguish between spanking and child abuse. Smacking a child across the face, for example, is not discipline. It is an abusive behavior, usually done in anger and out of frustration. Swatting a child on the butt, with a proper explanation of why it is being done, is discipline that will not physically cause the child any harm but will send the message that his or her behavior is disappointing and carries consequences.
Are there better ways to get that message across? In a very, very small percentage of children (those who are mentally and emotionally evolved well beyond their peers), I would say that conversation alone could communicate this. But in an overwhelming majority of children, words alone do not mean anything when it comes to discipline. There has to be action to reinforce the message, and it needs to be something that children are afraid of, not merely something they will dislike, such as taking away their phone or video game. That is not to say a child needs to be afraid of his/her parents (I would never suggest that) but, instead, they should be afraid of the consequences of screwing up. I was never afraid of my parents. I always knew that they loved me and that spanking me was very difficult for them (my dad cried every time he had to do it). What I hated about being spanked was that it made it very clear that I had disappointed my parents with my behavior. That is the lesson kids need to learn.0 -
Oh :blushing:0
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