Ending 1200 Calorie Bashing: Respecting Your Peers
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Just look at this recent thread (and it's just one very very recent one; there are tons of others that are much more judgmental): http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/870685-i-feel-sorry-for-women.
That was the breaking point for me. I don't need someone to feel sorry for me.
I also read the other thread about "why 1200 calories won't work" and I don't recall anyone actually bashing on anything or refusing to acknowledge that it's reasonable in some cases where there are medical conditions or extremely small people.
I've never seen a post on this forum that said "no human being ever, under any circumstances, without exception, can eat 1200 calories a day for the long term and be healthy." And I bet that if anyone did say that they'd get plenty of responses correcting them, mostly from the people who you seem to think are bent on attacking you.
The fact that people disagree over things doesn't mean they are bashing each other, or you. But it seems like you are feeling singled out and personally insulted whenever someone says that eating 1200 isn't necessary to lose for most people, unless they specifically mention your name as an exception or something. Shrug.0 -
the bashing was in the title I feel sorry for women the calories they eat. all the 1200 calorie commenters you are welcome to add me also. I am also tired of the starvation mode crap ironcially the people who tell me tihs eat a big mac and french fries in the same breath.0
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This is a huge point that is almost always blown right over in the whole 1200 calorie "debate". I have a net goal of 1200 is VERY different than I eat 1200. I net 1200, I eat about 1800 (the same number I get through the roadmap or eat more to weigh less or anything else that "forces" inclusion of exercise calories). This isn't entirely relevant to the OP's situation, but I believe that a NET of 1200 is entirely appropriate for most of the people on it. If they NET 1200-which is very, very, very different than eating 1200.
This. I have no bones to pick with the 1200 crowd if they're doing this.
This is pretty much where I'm at as well. I'll admit that the forums have me posting snarky at times, but on the most part I try to be helpful. There are too many people that think MFP is telling them to eat 1200 calories flat, when really the site is telling them to NET 1200.0 -
People seem to forget about manors here. It's the idea that you don't have to deal with people IRL so who cares how mean I say it, Right? Thick skin is needed, because I don't think this will change any time soon.
Whatever culture you were raised in, the internet is not that culture. It is a different culture, its own culture, with its own rules, mores, norms, standards, etc. If you're going to go on the internet at large you just need to accept that there are other people on the internet who do not share your vision of what it's supposed to be or how you are supposed to communicate, and you have no power over those people, and the more you try to nag or complain the more they get off on it, so as you said you might as well learn when to ignore or brush people off. Especially in a place like this where it involves people you don't actually know and are unlikely to ever meet, so even the most horrible string of insults anyone could type out is still nothing more than just words on a screen and ultimately has only as much power over you as you choose to give it.
Any site can set its own standards to be more of a subculture but unless it is closely moderated you are still going to have rude people, snark, sarcasm, etc. If anyone finds it incredibly important to have a place to discuss things within their own set of standards they can just make their own forum. I own/operate a forum (not about weight loss or fitness) and it's a very civilized place, so I am not just saying that.0 -
Very well put...many here do not agree with the way i eat...frequently falling below 1200...no im not starving myself ....i subscribe to the philosophy if you are hungry eat , if you are not hungry dont...i listen to my body not my mind.
I can definitely appreciate your live and let live attitude0 -
I'll be honest and say that while your post is really important in that it's a great reminder that MFP is supposed to be a supportive community and not a bunch of attack dogs, I think there is a valuable reason behind why people discourage others from eating 1200 cal diets and refer people who do to IPOARM.
Not everyone has all of the issues you described - a lot of the people doing 1200 are not obese and do not have medical issues. You get to be the special snowflake. Not everyone can also afford to see dietitians or use a bod pod. Blanket advice is very useful and I would say that for 99% of people 1200 calories is too low. Metabolisms do vary, but that's why BMR uses an average and people are encouraged to play around with their numbers after giving eating more a try.
I'm also going to point out that saying "1200 calories is ok for me! It's ok for you too!" seems a bit irresponsable given that you are medically recommended to do so. I'm expecting swarms of "I do 1200 calories and I love it so everyone telling me to eat more should shut up" comments.
But yes. You are correct. Supportive community, blah blah. Play nice, blah blah.
^ This. OP, sounds like what you are doing is good for you. It would not be good for me or many others. We are each different and we must each find what works for each of us as individuals. Good luck with your journey.0 -
Bump0
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I loved your post. I started at 1200 recommended by my Doctor but at the same time he said it, he also told me to find what works for me. I've been on a long hiatus from the site but eat around 1400-2000 depending on what I did that day. My metabolism is pretty high, but somedays I'm just not hungry.
And I must say, I don't give a damn if people have been jerks since the Internet was created. This site is about being on a journey and finding exactly what works for you. Constructive criticism is fine but the *kitten* remarks have got to go. That's not appealing to someone who just joined the site and is looking through the threads.
It's not about having thick skin, trust I've had a crap life, my skin can't get thicker, it just pisses me off when I see people being blatantly rude, it makes others not want to take your advice, even if it's right.
It's all about your tone.0 -
There will be the "you are lying" crowd, the "you can't count" crowd, and the very soapboxy "snowflake" crowd.
What's a "snowflake" crowd?
A blizzard.0 -
Great post! I, too, am insulin resistant and am on a low carb diet as a result and I hate it when people talk about how "it doesn't work". I haven't been attacked yet, but I could definitely understand how that would make me feel.0
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There will be the "you are lying" crowd, the "you can't count" crowd, and the very soapboxy "snowflake" crowd.
What's a "snowflake" crowd?
A blizzard.
:laugh:0 -
I loved your post. I started at 1200 recommended by my Doctor but at the same time he said it, he also told me to find what works for me. I've been on a long hiatus from the site but eat around 1400-2000 depending on what I did that day. My metabolism is pretty high, but somedays I'm just not hungry.
And I must say, I don't give a damn if people have been jerks since the Internet was created. This site is about being on a journey and finding exactly what works for you. Constructive criticism is fine but the *kitten* remarks have got to go. That's not appealing to someone who just joined the site and is looking through the threads.
It's not about having thick skin, trust I've had a crap life, my skin can't get thicker, it just pisses me off when I see people being blatantly rude, it makes others not want to take your advice, even if it's right.
It's all about your tone.
This this this this0 -
Thank you for posting this, Natalie. We are not all the same! That's for sure. I know my metabolism. And if I don't stay closer to the 1200-1300 end of things, I don't lose weight. That's just how it is. You just have to do what works for you & not let those know-it-all types at the forum bring you down. Great post!0
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You go girl-you said it all. We have to respect our differences. I am 5ft1inches tall and my maintenance level is 1500 calories.I run or walk every day yet if I eat 1200cals every day I lose only .8 lbs per week!!. For someone weighing 300lbs this is a starvation diet. For me, this is normal..This is an extremely slow weight loss for me so I get discouraged easily.
I only need to lose 10-15 lbs but at this calorie level it seems impossible.
Any suggestions from short people?0 -
I love how you can tell so many people comment when it's so obvious they skimmed over the original post and didn't get the main points.0
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the bashing was in the title I feel sorry for women the calories they eat. all the 1200 calorie commenters you are welcome to add me also. I am also tired of the starvation mode crap ironcially the people who tell me tihs eat a big mac and french fries in the same breath.
Thanks; exactly! I don't know how anyone would miss the explicit judgement being passed there.0 -
I am loving the positive feedback. We are all here for a reason. This site has helped me so much. Yet I have some friends who have tried and it didn't work for them. We are all different and unique individuals. Keep doing what your doing and be proud. I love what you had to say.0
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Very well written. Thank you for putting the time in to share this with everyone.0
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And I must say, I don't give a damn if people have been jerks since the Internet was created.This site is about being on a journey and finding exactly what works for you. Constructive criticism is fine but the *kitten* remarks have got to go. That's not appealing to someone who just joined the site and is looking through the threads.
You're welcome to argue with me about whether or not it's right, but I really don't care because it is neither right or wrong. It is simply true.I don't know how anyone would miss the explicit judgement being passed there.0 -
This is a great post. I often read the boards and am usually disgusted by the behaviour I see. Often 1200 is enough and I definitely am not starving. I don't know why people feel the need to be rude to others. Must reflect on their personal lives outside these boards.0
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