Tips for Gym Newbies

BUMP these are hilarious.

I'm not a newbie to the gym but i see a lot of posts on here having to do with people on their phones. I for one use my phone to look up and log my workouts on the bodybuilding.com website since i'm doing Jamie Easons plan. If i didn't have my phone i'd have to print out everything and walk around with a clip board and a pen... no thanks. I'll stick with my phone

Don't hog all of the dumbells and weights in the gym. Put back your weights.

The first day is usually the hardest, so don't give up! It gets easier the more you do it. Just like with the biggest loser contestants.

If I am using the squat rack, pull up station whatever..don't ask me how many more sets I have..when I;m done i'm done..

if you want to work in thats cool, just ask

Why should I not ask how many more sets? If you have one more (and you're using the only power rack in the gym), I'd wait. If you have 5 more, I'd do something else.

Please be quiet in the steam room. Although there is no sign on the door that says "no talking", please don't use it to gossip with your friends extremely loudly. It is a great space to wind down after a grueling workout.

If you feel the need to puff on a cancer stick before you come to the gym, please do so BEFORE you put your workout attire on/BEFORE you get in the car to come to the gym. I cannot stand working out next to someone who smells like a friggin ash tray. Smelling stale cigarettes when I'm trying to do anything that requires lifting heavy makes me want to vomit all over you.

1) Remember why you're there - to workout. Keep your mind focused on that and less on texting your friend, checking in on Facebook, holding a conversation, or flirting with Joe Steroids over there.

2) Remember that other people are there to workout, too. Instead of occupying the only ab machine in the gym for all 120 sets of 12 reps you plan on doing, how about limiting your use to 3 sets per occupation and let someone else get their sets in between yours?

3) If you, ma'am, think I might be creeping you, I probably am. I need motivation just like everyone else.

4) Before you judge me for my potbelly and graying goatee, remember that even Joe Steroids over there was a spaghetti-armed shrimp at one point. It didn't take me a week to get this

5) Wipe down the machines when you are done. Use a paper towel, alcohol wipe, or your own towel - I don't care what you use - just do it.

6) If you bring your kids to the gym (my gym is at the Y), please don't let them occupy machines that other people need to use just because you want to keep them busy. If they are legitimately using them, that's another story.

7) If you see me doing weird stretches in the corner before I workout, it's because I am allergic to bodily injury. I stretch to warm up and prevent injury. I still do PT stretches that I did in the Army. It served me well for my 9-year Army career and I walked away with zero damage from PT. Not everyone does things the way you do them and that's okay.

8) If you need to fill up your 6 gallon water bottle, please go to an empty workout room or seldom-used bubbler to do it. Your bottle just sapped all the cold water out of the bubbler reservoir and I am now drinking what has the same temp as fresh pee.

9) If the people obviously half-assing their workouts bug you, don't fret - they'll be gone by the end of next month.

10) I feel it bears repeating that you don't have to follow people as they walk to their cars so you can park as close to the front door as possible. You are there for fitness. Walking from the far edge of the parking lot counts.

Thanks so much for this topic! I've never been to a gym (save the college fitness center about 11 years ago). I can assume I know proper weight room protocols (stay out of the way, put things back where they belong, etc) but to hear it from people with experience really helps. The gym completely intimidates me...and the weight area scares me sh*tless. I don't have a membership yet, but I'm hoping after my roommate gets a job transfer we can get a membership to our workplace fitness center. I'm terrified of working out in front of others so it really helps to hear that people really don't care about my fat, sweaty, out-of-shape self.

I use my phone at the gym cause I have a weight lifting app on there. Not bothered if people think Im texting....I say, mind your own business

Good thread with good tips. I agree that long and loud conversations on the phone are a no no but fiddling with your phone is okay. I use mine to log reps and weights.

Please please please wipe down the benches and/or machines when you are done with them, even if you don't think you were sweating.

AMEN!!!!! I always clean and also carry around a pack of Clorox wipes just because I've seen people do some nasty stuff... like wiping the machine after they blew their nose and wiped the sweat with the same towel.... and since I am not sure how many people have done this to the machine I am about to use, I just use my Clorox wipes every time just in case...