Ending 1200 Calorie Bashing: Respecting Your Peers
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Nope, great resources and shared information can do people a favor. Bashing has no benefits at all. We can do one without the other.I am not a fan of any kind of bashing!
We all do things our own way for OUR reasons!!!
I respect others food / exercise / life choices, and I expect the same respect back!!!
Cheers!!!
When I first started out I had no idea what I was doing, and no one told me how to. The main reason people attack certain diets and plans is because they have been there and they have failed. Sure it works for a while but people have seen results better and longer with doing things a certain way - the right way. if someone on my FL is under 1000 cal for the day i ask them about bmr, tdee, and things like that. Most of the time they dont know, and for people who think they know and post in the forums about and love to spread the idea that 1200 is a magic number and it worked for them, most people wont read it how its presented and think "ok itll work for me because lady spent 45 dollars to get her calories checked in a bubble machine and a whole barrage of doctors said it was ok for her so i can do it without any knowledge of how its done". so those people will fall of the wagon, gain weight right back, and be miserable.
All the "bashing" is doing people a favor.0 -
Most immediately jump to 1200 calories, because they believe they will reach their goal faster. I can understand doing such a thing out of ignorance. However, that won't last long.
The "everyone is different" mantra is getting quite old. No, everyone is not different. You can't defy the laws of thermodynamics. 1200 calorie diets coupled with an exercise program should not be "prescribed" to anyone. I don't care how big and or how much weight you need to lose. Weight loss is not a short term solution, it's a long term endeavor.
Agree 100%
I love when Men in particular have advice for women on weight loss . It's so cute
Hate to ruin what might by my only opportunity to be "cute," but why can't men advise women on weight loss?
Weight loss between the sexes is a teeny bit different . I've been on MFP since August , logging , measuring and working hard 5 times a week . My Fiancé who thinks chicken parm subs are a healthy lunch because chicken is in the name , doesn't work out , and wakes up at 3 am and eats donuts recently lost 10 pounds due to work stress . Granted he ate a few less cookies that week . My Father also recently lost 30 pounds by cutting out Bacon ! And before you ask he was having it everyday with breakfast . My Mother who eats salad everyday told me she might just kill him . That's the difference0 -
I'm glad you smiled. I think your comparison of 'adults using this website' to 'children attending school' much funnier, and I thank you for the laugh.
Seriously, though, if you don't like it, you can pick other websites. It's admirable that you want to alter the discourse and make everyone's thoughts and behavior more suited to you, but I'm afraid that won't happen. I know, I know, that's not positivity and optimism.
It's honesty.That's hilarious. And when kids are bullied in school--they should switch schools? And when people are discriminated against for disabilities, sexuality, etc...they should just go self-marginalize as well. Wow. No, I'm investing in positivity here. I'm hoping to help the way which we address people, in general, in threads. This is exactly why it isn't a thread relevant to one particular group. It's a call for more respect for one another and that's something that is only going to help and not hurt. People who are losing weight are, understandably, sensitive about their diets and being addressed with negativity instead of constructive and kind criticism can be incredibly discouraging and alienating.Perhaps you would be more comfortable on a different website?0 -
I love when Men in particular have advice for women on weight loss . It's so cute
Yeah, that's hilarious Who do they think are?
And those male OB/GYN Consultants as well giving women advice in hospitals. How dare they!0 -
There are haters everywhere.0
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Great post0
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How does telling someone that their caloric intake might give them problems cause them to feel shame?When you tell someone outright that their caloric intake is wrong or bad and you cause shame, you make them feel like they have to defend themselves and that's just cruel.
Who attaches their value as a human being to whether or not a website's calculator can accurately guess their own caloric needs?0 -
I love when Men in particular have advice for women on weight loss . It's so cute
Yeah, that's hilarious Who do they think are?
And those male OB/GYN Consultants as well giving women advice in hospitals. How dare they!
A doctor is a little different than a snarky dude on the Internet0 -
Most immediately jump to 1200 calories, because they believe they will reach their goal faster. I can understand doing such a thing out of ignorance. However, that won't last long.
The "everyone is different" mantra is getting quite old. No, everyone is not different. You can't defy the laws of thermodynamics. 1200 calorie diets coupled with an exercise program should not be "prescribed" to anyone. I don't care how big and or how much weight you need to lose. Weight loss is not a short term solution, it's a long term endeavor.
Agree 100%
I love when Men in particular have advice for women on weight loss . It's so cute
Hate to ruin what might by my only opportunity to be "cute," but why can't men advise women on weight loss?
Weight loss between the sexes is a teeny bit different . I've been on MFP since August , logging , measuring and working hard 5 times a week . My Fiancé who thinks chicken parm subs are a healthy lunch because chicken is in the name , doesn't work out , and wakes up at 3 am and eats donuts recently lost 10 pounds due to work stress . Granted he ate a few less cookies that week . My Father also recently lost 30 pounds by cutting out Bacon ! And before you ask he was having it everyday with breakfast . My Mother who eats salad everyday told me she might just kill him . That's the difference
Unless your father was eating an almost heroic amount of bacon on a regular basis, he did not lose 30 lbs by eliminating it. If your mother needs a good excuse to kill your father, she needs to look elsewhere.
The laws of thermodynamics apply with no regard to sex. Men have an edge in losing weight due to a naturally higher lean body mass, but that's pretty much the end of it. The elements necessary to lose weight are the same for everyone.0 -
I love when Men in particular have advice for women on weight loss . It's so cute
Yeah, that's hilarious Who do they think are?
And those male OB/GYN Consultants as well giving women advice in hospitals. How dare they!
A doctor is a little different than a snarky dude on the Internet
I hope you were referring to me. "Snarky dude" is a title I have long striven for. :bigsmile:0 -
I love when Men in particular have advice for women on weight loss . It's so cute
Yeah, that's hilarious Who do they think are?
And those male OB/GYN Consultants as well giving women advice in hospitals. How dare they!
A doctor is a little different than a snarky dude on the Internet
Knowledge is gender neutral.0 -
How does telling someone that their caloric intake might give them problems cause them to feel shame?When you tell someone outright that their caloric intake is wrong or bad and you cause shame, you make them feel like they have to defend themselves and that's just cruel.
Who attaches their value as a human being to whether or not a website's calculator can accurately guess their own caloric needs?
My only question would be is there a line?
Ok we're not supposed to say anything to people eating 1200 calories about their intake being too low. We have to assume they might have a medical condition, but never ask about that medical condition.
Well what about 800 calories a day? 500?
At what point can we tell someone, "You probably need to eat more."
I know the answer. Never. What everyone is doing is right for them, even when they ask why it isn't working. Everyone is special and the slightest criticism, no matter how constructive, is an attack and bullying.
You all worry about the perceived tone of people's posts. I'm going to continue seeking out good info and getting results. That's what matters to me.0 -
I am not a fan of any kind of bashing!
We all do things our own way for OUR reasons!!!
I respect others food / exercise / life choices, and I expect the same respect back!!!
Cheers!!!
When I first started out I had no idea what I was doing, and no one told me how to. The main reason people attack certain diets and plans is because they have been there and they have failed. Sure it works for a while but people have seen results better and longer with doing things a certain way - the right way. if someone on my FL is under 1000 cal for the day i ask them about bmr, tdee, and things like that. Most of the time they dont know, and for people who think they know and post in the forums about and love to spread the idea that 1200 is a magic number and it worked for them, most people wont read it how its presented and think "ok itll work for me because lady spent 45 dollars to get her calories checked in a bubble machine and a whole barrage of doctors said it was ok for her so i can do it without any knowledge of how its done". so those people will fall of the wagon, gain weight right back, and be miserable.
All the "bashing" is doing people a favor.
If you only check my profile and diary you would SEE that I am one of those people who eats a LOT!!! I am on the other side of the "fence" big fan of eating to lose weight!!! 1600 - 2000 cals a day - and I am female 5 foot "tall"
But again to make a point - people have to do things on their own time, BASHING does not help, leading by example does!!!!0 -
How does telling someone that their caloric intake might give them problems cause them to feel shame?When you tell someone outright that their caloric intake is wrong or bad and you cause shame, you make them feel like they have to defend themselves and that's just cruel.
Who attaches their value as a human being to whether or not a website's calculator can accurately guess their own caloric needs?
My only question would be is there a line?
Ok we're not supposed to say anything to people eating 1200 calories about their intake being too low. We have to assume they might have a medical condition, but never ask about that medical condition.
Well what about 800 calories a day? 500?
At what point can we tell someone, "You probably need to eat more."
I know the answer. Never. What everyone is doing is right for them, even when they ask why it isn't working. Everyone is special and the slightest criticism, no matter how constructive, is an attack and bullying.
You all worry about the perceived tone of people's posts. I'm going to continue seeking out good info and getting results. That's what matters to me.
I really already addressed this. It's not about not offering advice. I never said don't express concern. I only hope that we can not make people feel wrong or bad or like failures. You can most certainly always say "How did you arrive at 1200? Some calculations can be off" or "this is how net calories work..." You can even say, "Wow 500 calories [or whatever] seems so low to me and I think you should seek medical consult (if you haven't already) for such an extreme deficit. "Here is a link to IPOARM and if you haven't checked it out already it might help and it might explain [insert issue] that you're having." All of these meet the goals of educating without being negative and without prying.0 -
Most immediately jump to 1200 calories, because they believe they will reach their goal faster. I can understand doing such a thing out of ignorance. However, that won't last long.
The "everyone is different" mantra is getting quite old. No, everyone is not different. You can't defy the laws of thermodynamics. 1200 calorie diets coupled with an exercise program should not be "prescribed" to anyone. I don't care how big and or how much weight you need to lose. Weight loss is not a short term solution, it's a long term endeavor.
Agree 100%
I love when Men in particular have advice for women on weight loss . It's so cute
Hate to ruin what might by my only opportunity to be "cute," but why can't men advise women on weight loss?
Weight loss between the sexes is a teeny bit different . I've been on MFP since August , logging , measuring and working hard 5 times a week . My Fiancé who thinks chicken parm subs are a healthy lunch because chicken is in the name , doesn't work out , and wakes up at 3 am and eats donuts recently lost 10 pounds due to work stress . Granted he ate a few less cookies that week . My Father also recently lost 30 pounds by cutting out Bacon ! And before you ask he was having it everyday with breakfast . My Mother who eats salad everyday told me she might just kill him . That's the difference
Unless your father was eating an almost heroic amount of bacon on a regular basis, he did not lose 30 lbs by eliminating it. If your mother needs a good excuse to kill your father, she needs to look elsewhere.
The laws of thermodynamics apply with no regard to sex. Men have an edge in losing weight due to a naturally higher lean body mass, but that's pretty much the end of it. The elements necessary to lose weight are the same for everyone.
I don't know what the hell he was doing . He's retired
.. My point is men lose weight much easier than women . Often on this site people like to quote absolutes and I'm sorry there is quite a bit of grey . Years of dieting , hormones all have an effect on weight loss .
You weren't the snarky guy !0 -
I really already addressed this. It's not about not offering advice. I never said don't express concern. I only hope that we can not make people feel wrong or bad or like failures. You can most certainly always say "How did you arrive at 1200? Some calculations can be off" or "this is how net calories work..." You can even say, "Wow 500 calories [or whatever] seems so low to me and I think you should seek medical consult (if you haven't already) for such an extreme deficit. "Here is a link to IPOARM and if you haven't checked it out already it might help and it might explain [insert issue] that you're having." All of these meet the goals of educating without being negative and without prying.
I don't think I'll ever be able to offer advice in a manner you find acceptable. I think you will always find fault in what someone says about diet or exercise. It's not the information that matters to you, but the way you perceive their tone. While criticizing people who come off as "experts" you have set yourself up as the grand expert on how everyone should behave and speak to one another. Not my cup of tea. So I'm bowing out now and setting you on ignore. Good luck to you on your efforts.0 -
Really well written!0
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You weren't the snarky guy !
Crap. There goes my day.0 -
Really well written!
I agree. And the responses (from the OP).0 -
'It's actually NOT easy to be snarky and judgmental. I think most of us who roll our eyes at these "I'm different! I swear it! I will die if I eat more than 8 calories per day!" posts would truly LOVE to be able to discuss healthy food and fitness techniques with the new members of the site.
The problem is that most of the people who come here claiming to be looking for advice are really only looking for confirmation of their pre-existing misconceptions about weight-loss. And when you tell them they are wrong, they immediately get defensive. Any attempt to dissuade them from bowing before the systematic starvation throne is viewed as being mean, snarky, and judgmental.The people here who say "Eat more," "lift heavy weights," "stop doing 100 hours of cardio a week," etc., are people who have been there and done that and have learned from experience what is SUSTAINABLE and what only works for about six weeks.
Then there is the inevitable "my doctor told me to do this, so you must not know what you're talking about" nonsense. Allow me to clue you in: most doctors don't know their *kitten* from their carotid arteries when it comes to losing weight. They tell you to eat 1000 calories per day because they don't KNOW what else to tell you. They spend their careers wiping noses, writing prescriptions for antibiotics, and passing people off to specialists. Experience has taught them that telling you to starve yourself will cause you to drop a lot of weight in a short amount of time, thus convincing you of their brilliance ... before you inevitably crash and burn, blame yourself, and settle on the fact that losing weight is simply not possible for you because you don't have the requisite willpower or discipline. And if you could think for yourself, you might have realized at some point along the way that maybe your doctor was wrong.
If you don't want to take my word for it, that's actually a good sign because you absolutely SHOULD be doing real, independent research. Spend some time educating yourself rather than taking your doctor's advice as gospel.
I think I love you.
YES YES YES!
THIS 100%.
Even when people give polite advice, if it goes against the mindset the OP has decided on (not the OP of this thread, but the OP who would ask for advice, for example) then you still can somehow upset someone....people don't like to be told that they are/may be wrong. I also quite enjoy that responses that question or challenge the OP but are polite = "I've already said this but You clearly missed the point" but responses that agree agree = "Thanks! Glad someone gets it.". No, mostly everyone "gets it"...it's just that not everyone thinks the same way and everyone needs to be a bit thoughtful that this is the INTERNET. Don't let someone's words...simple typed out letters on your screen...somehow break you.0
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