What did the volcano say to the other volcano?

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  • AserehtNerual
    AserehtNerual Posts: 5 Member
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    Sammy the snail trudged every day to work and back. Every day, as they passed Sammy by, Robert Rabbit would exclaim, "Outta the way, slug!" Gregory Grasshopper would sneer, "Can't you go faster?!" and Tommy Turtle would laugh, "Man, you're so slow!" It saddened Sammy to be ridiculed daily, so he saved every penny he could to buy a sleek and stylish car. He was so proud of his car he emblazened it with an "S" for Sammy so everyone would know it was him driving so fast. Now when he passes them they all just exclaim, "Wow! Look at that "S" car go!"
  • Maidofmer
    Maidofmer Posts: 908 Member
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    blonde jokes

    what do you call a dead blonde behind the couch?
    Last years hide n seek winner

    How do you make a wind tunnel?
    have a group of blondes stand shoulder to shoulder in a breeze

    How do you drown a blonde?
    Tell her there's a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool

    One day, there was a blonde driving a car at 90 MPH. She gets pulled over by a blonde cop. The cops asks to see her license and registration. She starts digging in her purse, stops, and asks the cop, "What does it look like?" The cop says, "You're license is a small rectangle with your picture on it." She nods and looks again. She finds her compact mirror, opens it and sees her reflection. She hands it to the cop. The cop looks at her and says, "Oh I didn't know you were a cop too!"

    There's a blonde, a red head, and a brunette sitting at the doctors office. The red head comes out saying "The doctor told me i'm having a girl!" The brunette comes out saying, "The doctor told me I'm having a boy!" The blonde comes out crying, "I'm not having puppies."
  • AserehtNerual
    AserehtNerual Posts: 5 Member
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    Two cannibals are eating. One looks at the other and asks, "Does this clown taste funny to you?"
  • mgobluetx12
    mgobluetx12 Posts: 1,326 Member
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    What goes ha ha ha thump?

    A man laughing his head off.
  • jojo1410
    jojo1410 Posts: 151
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    Did you hear about the zoo with only one dog?
    It was a ****zu!
  • SeaRunner26
    SeaRunner26 Posts: 5,143 Member
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    What lies at the bottom of the ocean and trembles? A nervous wreck.
  • ChelseaYepThatsMe
    ChelseaYepThatsMe Posts: 457
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    Redneck dictionary word : Tudor House. "i live in a tudor house. Has a door on the front and one on the back"
  • Rosa1213
    Rosa1213 Posts: 456 Member
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    Science joke:

    Silver and Gold are at a bar, drinking. Silver goes to the bathroom, and while he's gone, Gold sits in Silver's seat and starts drinking Silver's drink. So when Silver comes back, he exclaims: "Hey, You! Get out of my seat!" and Gold replies: "Hey... Gee, calm down.."


    (To those not so familiar with the periodic table, the symbol for Gold is "AU" and the symbol for Silver is "AG". Thus "AG"="Hey, Gee", and "AU"="Hey You".)
  • Doodlewhopper
    Doodlewhopper Posts: 1,018 Member
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    Science joke:

    Silver and Gold are at a bar, drinking. Silver goes to the bathroom, and while he's gone, Gold sits in Silver's seat and starts drinking Silver's drink. So when Silver comes back, he exclaims: "Hey, You! Get out of my seat!" and Gold replies: "Hey... Gee, calm down.."


    (To those not so familiar with the periodic table, the symbol for Gold is "AU" and the symbol for Silver is "AG". Thus "AG"="Hey, Gee", and "AU"="Hey You".)

    You gotta be a Maggie. LOL
  • weldergirl15
    weldergirl15 Posts: 103 Member
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    Pete and repeat were on a boat, pete fell off who was left.....

    Why did Mickey go to space.....to visit Pluto

    What do you call cheese that isn't yours.....nacho cheese
  • Mrder37
    Mrder37 Posts: 904
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    A man comes out his front door and nearly stands on a snail yuk he says picks up the slug and throws it over the roof of his house , 3 months later he's on his way to work he opens the front door and the slug says what the **** did you do that for.
  • AZDewd223
    AZDewd223 Posts: 21
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    The volcano said, "My favorite color is LAVAnder..."

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