Food Police And Nasty Hurtful Comments
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Are you sure there isn't something in the water where you live? That is some crazy behavior.
This!! That is bats**t cray cray
My thoughts exactly.0 -
In what city do you live? Remind me not to move there! WOW0
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I agree with everyone else. I'm not sure you are surrounding yourself with the correct people - although some of it isn't your choice. If all that is going on at work, talk to human resources. There are laws against hostile work places and that sure sounds hostile to me.
When I was little, I was terrified of dogs. My mom and dad explained that when you were afraid, dogs could sense it, Seems like rude people are the same way. I cannot imagine saying things like this to anyone at all. I might be able to excuse the mooing concertgoer as a drunk idiot, but I would never excuse the behavior that your co-workers and neighbors are exhibiting and I would encourage you to seek out new people to associate with.
For me, I've always found the best response to any type of rudeness to be something like the following. First put on my sweetest smile, then say without a trace of sarcasm or rudeness, but just in the form of a polite lady (warning: this might take some practice. LOL!):
"Thanks so much for your concern. My mom always taught me that polite manners and a good character were beyond reproach. I'm so glad I've been able to make her proud." I deliver that in a gentle tone and sometimes add an arm pat. This never fails to shut a grown adult up if for no other reason than they have no idea what to say when their rudeness has been pointed out so politely. That gives me a chance to say, "I hope your day gets only better from here!" and make my escape.0 -
Wow... not sure if I would have been as nice and walked away
Just smile and know you're on the right journey... it's not a 'diet' you need to follow, it's a lifestyle. Keep remembering that! Chin up
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Those people are idiots... Don't let dumb, sad, rude people bring you down!
If anything, turn it into motivation to kick *kitten* for yourself!0 -
Are these people perfect? I doubt it. They make these comments because they are insecure about themselves and it makes them feel better.
I had a friend once a few years ago. He was always pointing out my weight, how fat I was, etc. At his birthday party he told me not so eat so much and even stared at me while I ate a piece of his birthday cake. He kept telling me to go to the gym. This was back when I was 140 lbs at 5'8".. a very average weight. Of course this bugs me and still does especially when I am 40 lbs heavier than that now. Needless to say we aren't friends anymore. Tell these people to shove it. I wish I did and I regret every opportunity I had that I didn't take to punch this guy in the face. LOL.0 -
Sorry to hear that people are treating you like that... Honestly people need to mind their own business a lot more... not just with food comments, but just life in general... People feel like it is their personal responsibility to tell people what to eat, what to wear, how to raise their kids, will correct EVERY grammatical mistake someone else makes.
I feel like people that think it their personal responsibility to tell other people how to live, unsolicited, clearly do not lead full enough lives themselves, so decide to pick apart what everyone else does.
Take solace in the fact that on the whole, you probably live a much happier life than they do.0 -
I have also been a victim of bullying, both as a child and teenager and sadly, as an adult. It got so bad for me that I tried to take my own life over it. Here are some words of wisdom someone showed me, "If someone treats you like **** just remember that there is something wrong with them, not you. Normal people don't go around destroying other human beings" Good luck on your journey, you are a beautiful person and you don't need anyone to validate you :flowerforyou:0
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I know what you mean, I'm surrounded by people like that. You're right they hurt so much. You think you've changed and nothing will bother you, then BOOM! floored by a moron. Try not to let them get to you, they're clearly idiots.I always think if you can't say anything nice, then don't bother!0
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That is crazy behavior I have never seen people act like that or to tell a stranger what they should or should not be eating. People really need to practice if you have nothing nice to say then keep your mouth shut.0
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Are you sure there isn't something in the water where you live? That is some crazy behavior.
This....I cant believe these stories are real.
I've seen people actually hang out of car windows and moo or bark at overweight people. Disgusting behavior and never an excuse to behave like that. I'm sure it has everything to do with their upbringing.
I've never had anyone comment on what I'm eating but since I lost a lot of weight, I've noticed that my friends and family pay a lot more attention to what I'm eating, or more likely, what I'm NOT eating I think that is actually to my advantage now because it makes me hope that I'm setting a good example for them.
Gina0 -
Hi....You're giving them to much time in your head.....0
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You have a lot more reserve than I do. I would have gone off on them. How dare they! Do they know at all what goes into losing weight? I eat pizza, cupcakes, etc...but I moderate! Next time some one does that to you stop, look at them in the eye and say, "It is good to know why there are bullies in our schools. I see now where it comes from." I bet they stop.0
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Wow, totally unacceptable. I don't encounter that very often and when I do, it's usually my mother. I distinctly remember around 8th or 9th grade (we're going back 25 years people, so it left a dent) that my mother at lunchtime on a weekend suggested that perhaps I should only eat 1/2 a sandwich for lunch. I was about 10 lbs overweight and I truly think it was about that time that I developed the mentality, "well, if I'm fat already why not keep eating". It's served me well - now I have 80 lbs to lose. I think people don't even realize how much words can hurt, though how much the right words can make such a difference. I'm sorry you had to experience those things, but I hope you are finding great support from your MFP community!0
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When I was younger, I was shy and insecure, which resulted in being picked on and bullied. As an adult, I've gotten to a point where I don't really give a *kitten* what other people think of me, so I don't really take notice of what other people are saying about me, but in the rare instance where someone has said something rude that really pisses me off, I find that calling them out on it is immediately gratifying. People like that are bullies, and aren't used to being challenged or put in their place, so usually calling them out on their rudeness is enough to shut them up. On occasion, you'll find the particularly belligerent one who's looking for a fight, but they're far and few between.
My suggestion is, ignore the random stranger and their snark, but definitely call out people you must interact with, like people at work, acquaintances from your neighborhood, etc… Standing up to them and calling them out on the carpet may not only prevent them from saying things in the future, but will hopefully give you a sense of empowerent.
edited for spelling.0 -
Where do you live? Skinnymeanieville? This is horrible!!!0
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The best revenge in life is success. Use it as motivation to attain your goals."In the end, what matters isn't how long we've lived, but how fully we've lived...the good we've done, the friends we've made, the love we shared along the way."--Emrick the Petalar
"We're all leaves passing in the wind, here and then gone. But while we're here, we live to the fullest!"--Lion-O0 -
The best revenge in life is success. Use it as motivation to attain your goals.
^^this
Agreed. Now, when I feel stares or hear whispers, I just think to myself, "I've lost 52 pounds, jerk. Think whatever you want." It's very empowering. I don't feel nervous going out in public anymore.
That's just awesome. Good for you!0 -
Insulting, rude, hateful... I could go on...comments are all about the person delivering them, not about you. Others have given some excellent advice about what you could say to these ignorant people. But I am more concerned about how you have internalized the pain and kept it for years. This is not good for your mental health. Find a way to let it go. Maybe write down every single comment and have a little ceremonial fire to burn them up...they will turn to ashes and smoke which is all they are in the first place. Not worth your consideration at all. Know that you have the power over this situation.
Personally I have never encountered this rude behavior. I think a silent glare would be all I could manage. Hugs, Ani0 -
The best revenge in life is success. Use it as motivation to attain your goals."In the end, what matters isn't how long we've lived, but how fully we've lived...the good we've done, the friends we've made, the love we shared along the way."--Emrick the Petalar
"We're all leaves passing in the wind, here and then gone. But while we're here, we live to the fullest!"--Lion-O
this must be from the reboot. In the original ThunderCats Lion-O was sort of a douche bag.0
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