I'm just going to come out and say it

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135

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  • peacefulsong
    peacefulsong Posts: 223 Member
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    And this is why I have 0 friends on purpose. Friggin' high school all over again. No thanks.

    Same here, pretty much. I have two friends, both of whom I know from other forums about other interests. One will often go days without logging in, the other logs every day. I had three friends, but one unfriended me. As far as I can tell it was because I don't have an open diary. She asked why, I explained my reasoning, and a few days later she was gone. Heh. None of this affects me. I don't really get why it bothers anyone so much if someone else does things differently, or doesn't log every single day, or whatever. To each their own, I suppose.
  • ihateroses
    ihateroses Posts: 893 Member
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    Wow....you actually have time to go through your friends list every 3 days?


    I just came back to MFP after a pretty hectic month, happy to see my MFP friends spared me :p
  • SoViLicious
    SoViLicious Posts: 2,633 Member
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    I get "Delete Happy" at times. Ask anyone I've deleted.
  • Serenstar75
    Serenstar75 Posts: 258 Member
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    My FMS took a HUGE bad turn and I stopped logging, stopped trying to keep track as I was so foggy and exhausted. What I did, however, was check in without logging. People on my friends list kept me motivated to do this once I was better. I'm doing better. I'm logging daily. I don't delete people for that. I know this is a hard journey. I know there are pitfalls. They aren't taking up my space or bothering me at all to NOT be there. They know I'm here for them, too, when they're able to come back.
  • Anna800
    Anna800 Posts: 637 Member
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    I forgive 3 days, all my vacations are international and maybe I'll find a computer to get on once a week to email. I delete people who haven't been on in a month.
  • Bubbl3s25
    Bubbl3s25 Posts: 210
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    I have been on MFP since May last year but only logged on to the computer last week and found the forums. I have a couple of friends at to stage and am happy to comment on their posts but not on everyone. One of the things I was looking for in friends was other people to bounce ideas off, ask opinions and perhaps sneak a few recipes.
    I often go camping and with no Internet it is often hard to log in. I would hate to think I had been deleted after three days
  • NRSPAM
    NRSPAM Posts: 961 Member
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    I don't get why you would unfriend someone just because someone isn't logging for a short time. Some people go places where there are no computers. Some people take a break from logging, it doesn't mean that they quit. You can always add more friends for more support.
  • Crankstr
    Crankstr Posts: 3,958 Member
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    And this is why I have 0 friends on purpose. Friggin' high school all over again. No thanks.

    tumblr_mhhpw0074B1s29y53o1_250.gif
  • xFamousLastWordsx
    xFamousLastWordsx Posts: 301 Member
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    And this is why I have 0 friends on purpose. Friggin' high school all over again. No thanks.

    ^this.
  • hockeywife91
    hockeywife91 Posts: 31 Member
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    I think 3 days is harsh as well. I've been on here steadily for the past month, but I haven't logged every day. It's only been until recently that I have been able to log daily. In my case, I have had gastric band surgery, and therefore, I am not able to eat the "normal" amount of calories a typical person would eat. Plus, I'm still in the recovery stages and my diet is extremely strict, which means I'm not able to eat the same types of foods right now. So I guess I would be unfriended by some on that basis alone. I haven't unfriended anyone, and I don't plan to. I try to be supportive and non-judgmental of my friends, regardless of what they choose. If anyone wants to add me, please feel free to do so.
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
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    Not sure how some's progress derails you. I have a few friends that have lost significant amounts of weigh that were gone for weeks due to family issues, vacations, work, ect. They havent given up just had not been able to log on, but to each his/her own.
  • Aidina
    Aidina Posts: 7 Member
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    I am the same way other then I dont delete them . I just wait and see lol..but I sure wish I had more motivation from this site..Im a yo yo dieter and I just cant seem to stay to one thing . Sometimes it takes me about three days to log in but I have a very busy day,Job kids etc. But sometimes I get discouraged . I have no support just myself..I have no friends here so I have to talk myself into it as far as workouts and dieting . So please feel free to add me or anyone for that matter..
  • LikeNoOneElse84
    LikeNoOneElse84 Posts: 475 Member
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    I'm going to agree with everyone else that 3 days is too strict. People may not have the ability to log due to vacations, illness, death, or various other reasons but are otherwise still doing well with living a healthy lifestyle. I only kick people to the curb if its been weeks and they haven't logged in or haven't given an explanation ahead of time as to why they will be gone for such an extended period of time.
  • Phaedra2014
    Phaedra2014 Posts: 1,254 Member
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    I love it when new people add me as a friend. It feels great to lose weight with other members of the MFP community.

    But the first time I see the "so and so has been inactive for three days" thing, I unfriend them. It's not because I don't want to be supportive, or because I think less of them. But I really want to stay committed to this, and the more people I see who have been away for a week or even a month, the harder it is to convince myself that I should take the effort to track everything, every day.

    So if you add me, wonderful! But please don't be offended if I unfriend you if you go on hiatus.

    Seriously? That much of a control freak? How does your MFP friends' commitment have the power to influence yours? If you feel you must control what people on your online friend list (you don't even know them personally) do in their lives then losing weight is the least of your issues.

    Stay focused on your goals and let the world turn as it pleases.
  • Dreamerlove
    Dreamerlove Posts: 441 Member
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    mmmmk. :/ We shouldnt be friends on MFP then. You're going to be sad when you go one Vacation or something and now everyone unfriends you. I'll stick to my understanding kind friends.
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
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    You have every right to delete anyone you want. It is your friend list, and you are here for yourself - not them. Having said that, I rarely delete people, but I also rarely send or accept friend requests.
  • rosiereally2
    rosiereally2 Posts: 539 Member
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    Three days?? Wow. How supportive.
  • Erica_theRedhead
    Erica_theRedhead Posts: 724 Member
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    I don't un-friend or deny a friend request from anyone. I'm in this for me. If people on here are active and motivating, I'll give them the same consideration. If they fall off the wagon or aren't active, it doesn't bother me. They may always come back, and I can be there if they want support.
  • ColoradoLes
    ColoradoLes Posts: 13
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    So if I go on a 5-day backpack trip and have zero cell phone coverage and don't log in, even though I may be burning 3,000 calories a day, you're going to (hypothetically) dump me?

    This is why I don't have 'friends' like you. Good riddance.
  • LdyPsych
    LdyPsych Posts: 79 Member
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    I only do it if it's been weeks not 3 days. What if the went on vacation and were out of cell range?
    I also unfriend if their ideas about eating are super duperly different than mine. If we clash that much, there won't be any support from either side, just bickering. I also unfriend if I find out you eat way to few calories.

    I have to agree and disagree ....3 days is pretty stringent criteria IMHO. My mother has been very ill recently and I feel sure if she were in real need It would require enough time and attention that there would be time for little else. What about a very sick child? What about on vacation or a cruise, .... do you know what the rates are to use the computer or cell phone roaming on a ship or in a foreign country? I am not paying several hundred dollars to connect to MFP in such a case to upload my eating log. Maybe it's an issue of being at a different stage in life, but I can think of many reasons that I could end up missing 3 days (and I have hardly had a cheat day or missed a workout day in 15 months, I am really dedicated). I am pretty new here and would like some new friends, but am not sure that I would want anyone who would defriend me after only 3 days or 7 or 20. And, don't think it is up to me to monitor anyone's eating and fitness other than my own. A friend isn't a coach or a mommy or a critical spouse (again, in my opinion) - friendliness is all I want and all I offer. If someone wants that kind of "friend" then I am fine if they add me :heart:

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