We are pleased to announce that on March 4, 2025, an updated Rich Text Editor will be introduced in the MyFitnessPal Community. To learn more about the upcoming changes, please click here. We look forward to sharing this new feature with you!

worst pick up lines ever!

1235

Replies

  • Freyja2023
    Freyja2023 Posts: 158 Member
    Heaven must be crying since it has lost one of its prettiest angles.

    Of course not toooo bad if he hadn't just asked me if I had any spare change to spare
  • Fozzi43
    Fozzi43 Posts: 2,984 Member
    I can see something beautiful in your eyes...

    whoops that's just my reflection.


    Actually that's an awesome pick up line that always works.

    I can believe that coming from you.
  • wendyhutchesonwasden
    wendyhutchesonwasden Posts: 140 Member
    "Nice shoes, wanna f*#$?"

    "Do you like bagels or toast?"...."Why?"...."So I can know what to make you for breakfast in the morning."

    "Do you like eggs?"..."Yeah."...."Do you like them fertilized?"

    "You look like my future ex-wife."
  • stunningalmond
    stunningalmond Posts: 275 Member
    Haha!!! These are hilarious!!

    I've had a guy tell me, "If you were homework I'd be doing you on my desk right now."

    And one time in a bar some dude came up to me and told me I was the sweetest thing ever and licked my face. :sick:
  • Now yall be ready to just melt like puddy this one

    I may not be Fred flinstone but I can make your bedrock


    I may not be Barney Rubble but I can make your p**sy crumble
  • teamdj1
    teamdj1 Posts: 265 Member
    Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn you were just checking out my package.
  • lizlkbg
    lizlkbg Posts: 566
    When I was a young mom with a toddler: "Hey mother, want another?"

    WTF?!?!?!?

    PS - I totally said yes
    PPS - j/k
  • teamdj1
    teamdj1 Posts: 265 Member
    My magic watch tell's me that you don't have any underwear on.....Oh you do? My watch must be 15 minutes fast.
  • I like to do basic math so lets add me and you, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply
  • SamanthaClarexo
    SamanthaClarexo Posts: 353 Member
    "Feel my shirt.... know what that's made of?..... Boyfriend material".


    Christ.....
  • teamdj1
    teamdj1 Posts: 265 Member
    Are you google? Because you have everything that i am looking for.
  • damn girl you have the body of an angel...its just a shame you face is from hell
  • Seoul11
    Seoul11 Posts: 138 Member
    In junior high, a guy walked up to me in a mall and handed me a sugar packet and says, "I think you dropped this, it has your name on it."
    :laugh: :huh: :yawn: :noway:

    This happened to a friend of mine at a restaurant... but I guess there must not have been sugar on the table because what he handed to my friend was a packet of Sweet 'n' Low. Still kinda worked since she was under 4'11".

    Not sure if this even counts as a pick up line but the worst thing I had said to me in a bar was, "If you don't come home with me tonight, I'm going to have to go home alone and j*** *ff to Japanese porn."

    First, that's my problem... how?
    Second, I didn't want you before... but now that you've implied that you routinely pleasure yourself to Japanese adult films, I don't know how I'll keep my hands off you long enough to make it back to your place!
  • WickedZoey
    WickedZoey Posts: 401 Member
    Had a dude say that he wished he was my tampon once.... that was pretty bad.
  • TheLuSir
    TheLuSir Posts: 1,674 Member
    When I was a young mom with a toddler: "Hey mother, want another?"

    WTF?!?!?!?

    PS - I totally said yes
    PPS - j/k

    ^This.
  • TheLuSir
    TheLuSir Posts: 1,674 Member
    Had a dude say that he wished he was my tampon once.... that was pretty bad.

    A bloody fool, I say!
  • gerard54
    gerard54 Posts: 1,107 Member
    im not the best looking guy in here but im the only one talking to you haha...
  • Bigbill810
    Bigbill810 Posts: 117
    I have size 18EE (USA) feet. At least 4 times, I have had girls use this line:


    "So, is it true what they say about guys with big feet?"


    Followed by a cheesy grin, because even they know that was bad, lol.
  • lizlkbg
    lizlkbg Posts: 566
    I have size 18EE (USA) feet. At least 4 times, I have had girls use this line:


    "So, is it true what they say about guys with big feet?"


    Followed by a cheesy grin, because even they know that was bad, lol.

    And, ummmm...is it?
  • teamdj1
    teamdj1 Posts: 265 Member
    You had me at "What the F--- you doing in my closet?"
  • kmorg22
    kmorg22 Posts: 180
    damn girl you have the body of an angel...its just a shame you face is from hell

    lmao!!!!!! :drinker:
  • My3Sons1051
    My3Sons1051 Posts: 356 Member
    Had a guy once tell me "I'm hung like a horse.......a seahorse."
    I spit my drink all over him, lol.
  • foxro
    foxro Posts: 793 Member
    Maybe if you eat some of that makeup you'll be pretty inside too !!
  • Girl, are you retarded? Because you look special.
  • 75kp
    75kp Posts: 1
    If you have sex with me, the next hour ( give or take 59 minutes ) will be the best hour of your life ;)
  • samdondero
    samdondero Posts: 47 Member
    roses are red,
    violets are blue,
    i like spaghetti.
    lets f**k.
  • brandon0523
    brandon0523 Posts: 516
    How much does a polar bear weigh


    Enough to break the ice. Hi my names brandon
  • samdondero
    samdondero Posts: 47 Member
    do u work at subway? cuz youre giving me a foot long.
  • brandon0523
    brandon0523 Posts: 516
    You got freckles i got freckles we got.something in common lets fk
  • samdondero
    samdondero Posts: 47 Member
    damn u and ur freckle jokes!!!

    did u just fart? cuz ur blowing me away.
This discussion has been closed.