I approached my gym crush .....

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Replies

  • trojanbb
    trojanbb Posts: 1,297 Member
    Thank you guys for all the great advice!!!! BTW who takes 4 hours to reply back unless your with someone and that someone is with you 24-7!!:huh:

    someone not interested or losing interest. or he is busy. But sounds like losing interest, for whatever reason (he really has an ex, a gf, or just not that interested)
  • JustJennie1
    JustJennie1 Posts: 3,749 Member
    Thank you guys for all the great advice!!!! BTW who takes 4 hours to reply back unless your with someone and that someone is with you 24-7!!:huh:

    Sometimes me. And all the time my husband and not because we're together 24/7. He has a crappy phone and doesn't get any messages. I don't always hear my phone go off until hours later.

    NOT that I'm offering him excuses but like vtmoon asked: How was he on your first date?
  • esmeralda44
    esmeralda44 Posts: 62 Member
    also since he was that honest with you, he is in a break up phase. But it does sound like they are living together still or have one of those on and off relationships but he is ready to exit.

    Was he shy on the date or was letting loose?

    On our date he was nervous and he is naturally shy.
  • esmeralda44
    esmeralda44 Posts: 62 Member
    Honestly something happended on Sunday night....He when out for St. Patty's day. Becuase even Sunday he would reply maybe the most within 5 min. Maybe around 8:30 I send him a message and asked him if he wanted to hang out. He said he was already out with his "ex-roomate" if he would of known earlier. Then I didn't hear from him until monday evening.
  • vtmoon
    vtmoon Posts: 3,436 Member
    also since he was that honest with you, he is in a break up phase. But it does sound like they are living together still or have one of those on and off relationships but he is ready to exit.

    Was he shy on the date or was letting loose?

    On our date he was nervous and he is naturally shy.

    nervous as in sweating from trying to talk to you and leave a good impression nervous, or nervous of being seen as in he jumped when the waitress dropped a plate?
  • vtmoon
    vtmoon Posts: 3,436 Member
    I say play it cool, and slow/cut communication until next time in the GYM even a shy guy would be smart enough to explain.
  • nolachick
    nolachick Posts: 3,278 Member
    I say play it cool, and slow/cut communication until next time in the GYM even a shy guy would be smart enough to explain.

    agree. play it cool, distance yourself til he sorts thru his drama. i'm not saying wait for anything, but just see him at the gym and work out if u want but don't let it go past that.
  • breeshabebe
    breeshabebe Posts: 580
    Honestly something happended on Sunday night....He when out for St. Patty's day. Becuase even Sunday he would reply maybe the most within 5 min. Maybe around 8:30 I send him a message and asked him if he wanted to hang out. He said he was already out with his "ex-roomate" if he would of known earlier. Then I didn't hear from him until monday evening.

    Ex- roomate or ex- girlfriend or both?
  • horses7777
    horses7777 Posts: 165
    bump
  • kwilliams386
    kwilliams386 Posts: 156 Member
    The only reason you're giving this clown so many chances is because he's hot. That speaks volumes. Find another guy who actually isn't a d-bag. It just isn't that tough.

    You might be up to something here....lol

    This is the single biggest problem with every single woman. You all have this laundry list of traits you think make up a decent guy but at every turn you'll throw all of those out the window like for some guy just because of the way he looks regardless of how bad he treats you.

    Every single woman? Are you single? I have "thrown that list away" for men who were nothing close to hot, but came off as great guys. I am the queen of "give him a chance, he is a nice guy." Fuk it, Ilost my list. Anyone can treat you like *kitten*, they don't have top be hot to do so. The best guy I ever dated WAS the hottest guy I ever dated. That is because he was good to me. Ugly people just use that as an excuse for not getting laid. I say, get over the nice-guy syndrome and stop being a d!ck to women then maybe your grass will look a little greener.

    to OP: text him, whatever. Don't make him a priority. 1, when you find out he is an *kitten*, you will feel stupid. 2, If he wants you, he will find a way to be with you. Simple as that. Don't let life stop for one gym rat, there are plenty of great men out there ( hot or not) looking to make a great girl very happy. Men know a good woman when they see them. If they want you, they will stop at nothing to have you. If he doesn't, it just isn't meant to be.
  • nolachick
    nolachick Posts: 3,278 Member
    The only reason you're giving this clown so many chances is because he's hot. That speaks volumes. Find another guy who actually isn't a d-bag. It just isn't that tough.

    You might be up to something here....lol

    This is the single biggest problem with every single woman. You all have this laundry list of traits you think make up a decent guy but at every turn you'll throw all of those out the window like for some guy just because of the way he looks regardless of how bad he treats you.

    Every single woman? Are you single? I have "thrown that list away" for men who were nothing close to hot, but came off as great guys. I am the queen of "give him a chance, he is a nice guy." Fuk it, Ilost my list. Anyone can treat you like *kitten*, they don't have top be hot to do so. The best guy I ever dated WAS the hottest guy I ever dated. That is because he was good to me. Ugly people just use that as an excuse for not getting laid. I say, get over the nice-guy syndrome and stop being a d!ck to women then maybe your grass will look a little greener.

    to OP: text him, whatever. Don't make him a priority. 1, when you find out he is an *kitten*, you will feel stupid. 2, If he wants you, he will find a way to be with you. Simple as that. Don't let life stop for one gym rat, there are plenty of great men out there ( hot or not) looking to make a great girl very happy. Men know a good woman when they see them. If they want you, they will stop at nothing to have you. If he doesn't, it just isn't meant to be.

    ^^ AGREED!!! on both counts.
  • JustJennie1
    JustJennie1 Posts: 3,749 Member
    also since he was that honest with you, he is in a break up phase. But it does sound like they are living together still or have one of those on and off relationships but he is ready to exit.

    Was he shy on the date or was letting loose?

    On our date he was nervous and he is naturally shy.

    nervous as in sweating from trying to talk to you and leave a good impression nervous, or nervous of being seen as in he jumped when the waitress dropped a plate?

    ^^ This.

    And ex what? Or WHO?

    I say just keep it friendly and at a distance for now. You honestly don't know what's going on. When I met my husband he was married but "going through a divorce". I wasn't sure if he said that just to get in my pants or if it was actually true. Turns out it was actually true so while I wouldn't 100% dismiss this guy off the cuff for his lack of responses to your texts and not knowing if the ex is an ex I'd be cautious and possibly try to find out as much about him as you can before you get emotionally involved.
  • bluefox9er
    bluefox9er Posts: 2,917 Member
    For a few months now I have been crushing on a extremely gorgeous/hot guy at my gym. I am very serious about my workouts and so is he, I always have my earphones on and so does he. I am a very outgoing woman but not at the gym, I don't socialize at the gym. I try not to make eye contact with guys at my gym because I don't like to be hit on (I already feel vulnerable lifting weights around men). Over a month ago or so he approached me earphones off, and asked if I was done with the bench I was previously using, and I frozed up so I shook my head yes. I was already leaving I was putting on my sweater, I didn't take off my ear phones, and walked away. As I am walking to my car I felt horrible because I felt that it was rude but I think is that I feel shy around him. Fast forward two weeks ago, I am sitting on a leg raise machine and he asked if he could use the machine next to me, this time I took off my earphones and asked him if I could use it after he was done. After he was done he cleaned the bench and I said thank you, but he didn't hear me because of his earphones, and of course did not even turn back. I am not the person that stares but I caught him staring at me and as soon as I sense him looking at my he looks away. He never talks to anyone but seems very confident (the way he carries himself). Okay so so cutting to the point I approached him yesterday by the water fountain and told him thanx for cleaning up the bench and that I told him thank you but he didn't hear me. He said not to worry he is used to people not having gym etiquette...yes he talked to me for less than 3 min and the good thing is that he smiled but I was nervous as hell. I aslo asked him for help with raising a bench and after I told him thanx he just left. Then he left to a different side of the gym and I continued with my workout. He didn't ask for my name, nor it was nice to meet you, maybe I miss read all the signs, or maybe he has someone in his life. :frown:


    maybe..* just maybe*..he dosn't go to the gym to be picked up or pick up women and treats his workouts seriously??

    Or maybe you were not his type??
  • JustJennie1
    JustJennie1 Posts: 3,749 Member
    For a few months now I have been crushing on a extremely gorgeous/hot guy at my gym. I am very serious about my workouts and so is he, I always have my earphones on and so does he. I am a very outgoing woman but not at the gym, I don't socialize at the gym. I try not to make eye contact with guys at my gym because I don't like to be hit on (I already feel vulnerable lifting weights around men). Over a month ago or so he approached me earphones off, and asked if I was done with the bench I was previously using, and I frozed up so I shook my head yes. I was already leaving I was putting on my sweater, I didn't take off my ear phones, and walked away. As I am walking to my car I felt horrible because I felt that it was rude but I think is that I feel shy around him. Fast forward two weeks ago, I am sitting on a leg raise machine and he asked if he could use the machine next to me, this time I took off my earphones and asked him if I could use it after he was done. After he was done he cleaned the bench and I said thank you, but he didn't hear me because of his earphones, and of course did not even turn back. I am not the person that stares but I caught him staring at me and as soon as I sense him looking at my he looks away. He never talks to anyone but seems very confident (the way he carries himself). Okay so so cutting to the point I approached him yesterday by the water fountain and told him thanx for cleaning up the bench and that I told him thank you but he didn't hear me. He said not to worry he is used to people not having gym etiquette...yes he talked to me for less than 3 min and the good thing is that he smiled but I was nervous as hell. I aslo asked him for help with raising a bench and after I told him thanx he just left. Then he left to a different side of the gym and I continued with my workout. He didn't ask for my name, nor it was nice to meet you, maybe I miss read all the signs, or maybe he has someone in his life. :frown:


    maybe..* just maybe*..he dosn't go to the gym to be picked up or pick up women and treats his workouts seriously??

    Or maybe you were not his type??

    Did you read all the pages? They exchanged numbers. Went out on a date. Turns out he has an "ex" or a non ex. Not sure which.
  • kwilliams386
    kwilliams386 Posts: 156 Member
    For a few months now I have been crushing on a extremely gorgeous/hot guy at my gym. I am very serious about my workouts and so is he, I always have my earphones on and so does he. I am a very outgoing woman but not at the gym, I don't socialize at the gym. I try not to make eye contact with guys at my gym because I don't like to be hit on (I already feel vulnerable lifting weights around men). Over a month ago or so he approached me earphones off, and asked if I was done with the bench I was previously using, and I frozed up so I shook my head yes. I was already leaving I was putting on my sweater, I didn't take off my ear phones, and walked away. As I am walking to my car I felt horrible because I felt that it was rude but I think is that I feel shy around him. Fast forward two weeks ago, I am sitting on a leg raise machine and he asked if he could use the machine next to me, this time I took off my earphones and asked him if I could use it after he was done. After he was done he cleaned the bench and I said thank you, but he didn't hear me because of his earphones, and of course did not even turn back. I am not the person that stares but I caught him staring at me and as soon as I sense him looking at my he looks away. He never talks to anyone but seems very confident (the way he carries himself). Okay so so cutting to the point I approached him yesterday by the water fountain and told him thanx for cleaning up the bench and that I told him thank you but he didn't hear me. He said not to worry he is used to people not having gym etiquette...yes he talked to me for less than 3 min and the good thing is that he smiled but I was nervous as hell. I aslo asked him for help with raising a bench and after I told him thanx he just left. Then he left to a different side of the gym and I continued with my workout. He didn't ask for my name, nor it was nice to meet you, maybe I miss read all the signs, or maybe he has someone in his life. :frown:


    maybe..* just maybe*..he dosn't go to the gym to be picked up or pick up women and treats his workouts seriously??

    Or maybe you were not his type??

    Did you read all the pages? They exchanged numbers. Went out on a date. Turns out he has an "ex" or a non ex. Not sure which.

    previously on "I approached my crush..."


    Tune in next week when..
  • Cr01502
    Cr01502 Posts: 3,614 Member
    He said he was dealing with some bs so that he wanted to take care of it first.

    Me: I really appreciate the honesty and I don't want to cause problems. I won't text you anymore...and I am sorry for any problems I might of caused.

    Him: No you don't have to stop texting me its not like that we are not together anymore.

    Me: Well I guess one can't never have too many friends, right (always trying to be nice :( )

    Him: Yes and maybe later more

    Player:mad:

    Totally!

    Either that or he found out that their entire relationship is being picked apart by strangers on the internet . . . . .

    Because if I found out that I was dating a girl that was turning a couple of dates into a romance novel I'd head for the hills too.
  • esmeralda44
    esmeralda44 Posts: 62 Member
    He said he was dealing with some bs so that he wanted to take care of it first.

    Me: I really appreciate the honesty and I don't want to cause problems. I won't text you anymore...and I am sorry for any problems I might of caused.

    Him: No you don't have to stop texting me its not like that we are not together anymore.

    Me: Well I guess one can't never have too many friends, right (always trying to be nice :( )

    Him: Yes and maybe later more

    Player:mad:

    Totally!

    Either that or he found out that their entire relationship is being picked apart by strangers on the internet . . . . .

    Because if I found out that I was dating a girl that was turning a couple of dates into a romance novel I'd head for the hills too.


    :laugh: :bigsmile: :wink:
  • esmeralda44
    esmeralda44 Posts: 62 Member
    For a few months now I have been crushing on a extremely gorgeous/hot guy at my gym. I am very serious about my workouts and so is he, I always have my earphones on and so does he. I am a very outgoing woman but not at the gym, I don't socialize at the gym. I try not to make eye contact with guys at my gym because I don't like to be hit on (I already feel vulnerable lifting weights around men). Over a month ago or so he approached me earphones off, and asked if I was done with the bench I was previously using, and I frozed up so I shook my head yes. I was already leaving I was putting on my sweater, I didn't take off my ear phones, and walked away. As I am walking to my car I felt horrible because I felt that it was rude but I think is that I feel shy around him. Fast forward two weeks ago, I am sitting on a leg raise machine and he asked if he could use the machine next to me, this time I took off my earphones and asked him if I could use it after he was done. After he was done he cleaned the bench and I said thank you, but he didn't hear me because of his earphones, and of course did not even turn back. I am not the person that stares but I caught him staring at me and as soon as I sense him looking at my he looks away. He never talks to anyone but seems very confident (the way he carries himself). Okay so so cutting to the point I approached him yesterday by the water fountain and told him thanx for cleaning up the bench and that I told him thank you but he didn't hear me. He said not to worry he is used to people not having gym etiquette...yes he talked to me for less than 3 min and the good thing is that he smiled but I was nervous as hell. I aslo asked him for help with raising a bench and after I told him thanx he just left. Then he left to a different side of the gym and I continued with my workout. He didn't ask for my name, nor it was nice to meet you, maybe I miss read all the signs, or maybe he has someone in his life. :frown:


    maybe..* just maybe*..he dosn't go to the gym to be picked up or pick up women and treats his workouts seriously??

    Or maybe you were not his type??

    Did you read all the pages? They exchanged numbers. Went out on a date. Turns out he has an "ex" or a non ex. Not sure which.

    previously on "I approached my crush..."


    Tune in next week when..

    lol
  • aprmay
    aprmay Posts: 216 Member
    *quote"
    previously on "I approached my crush..."


    Tune in next week when..
    "quote"

    Oh this is getting good. :D
  • lintino
    lintino Posts: 526 Member
    bump
  • theshow4jsu
    theshow4jsu Posts: 380 Member
    I hate Twilight
  • esmeralda44
    esmeralda44 Posts: 62 Member
    Ok so Saturday he send a message about looking him up on facebook...so I did and I checked out his pics yesterday.
    Today he updated his status as "in a relationship" I guess he is back with the EX
  • vtmoon
    vtmoon Posts: 3,436 Member
    Ok so Saturday he send a message about looking him up on facebook...so I did and I checked out his pics yesterday.
    Today he updated his status as "in a relationship" I guess he is back with the EX

    yup she gave him some to get him back when she learned there is potential competition, poor guy those on and off relationships aretaxing.
  • Mummyadams
    Mummyadams Posts: 1,125 Member
    I say let it go - smile sweetly at him at the gym but look elsewhere.
  • AnnaMolly17
    AnnaMolly17 Posts: 91 Member
    Sounds to me like he's a little indecisive; he's halfway out the door with his current relationship, yet his interested in you but doesn't know if it's worth the investment (which you totally are!).

    Girl, take my advice. Tomorrow is Thursday. Put on your hottest spandex, and go in there and show him what he's missing.

    Good luck!!
  • Reinventing_Me
    Reinventing_Me Posts: 1,053 Member
    Ok so Saturday he send a message about looking him up on facebook...so I did and I checked out his pics yesterday.
    Today he updated his status as "in a relationship" I guess he is back with the EX

    She probably never was an EX.
  • Reinventing_Me
    Reinventing_Me Posts: 1,053 Member
    Ok so Saturday he send a message about looking him up on facebook...so I did and I checked out his pics yesterday.
    Today he updated his status as "in a relationship" I guess he is back with the EX

    yup she gave him some to get him back when she learned there is potential competition, poor guy those on and off relationships aretaxing.

    I doubt the girlfriend knows anything about the OP. Therefore, OP could not be competition.
  • Reinventing_Me
    Reinventing_Me Posts: 1,053 Member
    I say let it go - smile sweetly at him at the gym but look elsewhere.

    Exactly! Look elsewhere. Tell him to lose your number. As long as he has it (and you reply to his texts), he has an opening.
  • ihateroses
    ihateroses Posts: 893 Member
    The more I read the more I'm convinced that none of this ever happened :yawn:
  • kbelky
    kbelky Posts: 1 Member
    Who cares
This discussion has been closed.