Because I really need to talk!

He will treat you just the same or worse even when you are skinny. Run for the hills!

I guess it's all about perception. From my point of view, what I think is really ugly, is his inability to see what's beautiful and special about you just the way you are, his inability to encourage you and be supportive of you in your efforts and his insensitivity to your feelings. That's more how I would define 'ugly'. And, I find it hard to see how any of those inabilities could help with forming even a short term healthy relationship.

...I've come to the conclusion that he don't want to be in a relationship with me because I'm ugly...

No, he doesn't want to be in a relationship with you because he is a worthless piece of crap who deserves to be castrated and walk the streets in shame.

You are beautiful, if you lived near me I would treat you like a queen, guys like that don't deserve to be with anyone let alone someone as pretty as you are.

I had an abusive boyfriend like that - it made me feel constantly upset, on edge, like I was worthless - and I kept going back like stockholm syndrome.
It took 1 year and 8 months for me to actually realise how stupid I'd been to put up with that. It wasn't until my mum got diagnosed with a progressive and terminal illness and he reacted in an 'oh well :ohwell:' way that I realised how poisonous he really was.

When you do break up with him - you will have mad regret and hate, but don't let that change you forever - just learn and promise yourself that you will NEVER let anyone treat you like that again.

You will also want to go back to him when you leave him for the first week or two. Ignore those feelings, get through them and tell a friend. I promise once you see the light you will emerge as a majestic swan ready to crush the haters.

:flowerforyou:

#1 The first weight you should lose is the guy. Telling you "you're kinda ugly" or "you're fat" is not an indication of anything other than a desire to control. If he doesn't want the relationship to be serious, and is asking other women out, it's not really a relationship, anyway. And you deserve much better.

#2 YOU ARE NOT UGLY. Just from looking at your profile picture, I can say that you are a very pretty young woman.

#3 From your picture, you aren't fat. You may feel like you want to lose some, and that's okay, as long as you are doing it to feel better, not to snag some guy. And, even if you have a few pounds to lose (I can't say either way, no idea about your height/weight) YOUR WEIGHT DOES NOT DEFINE YOU, OR YOUR WORTH.

I'm glad you're getting in to see someone. I hope they can help you see the positives in you. I hope that you can learn to talk to yourself nicely and not let anyone else drag you down.

Perfectly said!!

Everybody here has already told you what to do, and I hope you're ready and strong enough to do it. But I want to tell you something that others did not say: there MIGHT NOT be a man out there for you. We all need to learn to live with ourselves first, and then if the right guy comes along, great; but if he doesn't, we need to build our own happy lives. I have been single for 15 years and I've never been happier in my life. I don't date, because the situation where I live severely limits chances for a woman of my age, but I'm okay with that because I have an income, a good life, and I am happy. You can be too, and I hope you soon will be.

Are you serious!? You are beautiful! Funny thing is..........I feel the same way you feel about yourself is how I feel about myself. Sometimes we can not see our own beauty.....

Just remember--we have nothing to gain by lying to you on here, so believe us when we say he is so self centered that he can't see how beautiful you are. It sounds to me like he is trying to bring you down to feel like he may feel.

You have to take care of YOU. Emotionally and physically! Dumping this guy will be the best thing for you. It's better to do it sooner than later when things get more complicated and he shoots you down so much more that you feel you can't leave your relationship. It's never going to get easier than it will be today. Show him that not only are you beautiful, you're brave and strong enough to walk out on someone who could treat you that way.

Good luck!

The guy is a jerk. This has nothing to do with you. He's a jerk and he's manipulating you and using you.

Dump him. Plain & simple.

Yep.

Furthermore stop relying on men to dictate how pretty/fat/thin/ugly you are.

Have confidence and yourself.

Hi!

I've been using myfitnesspal for a while now, and sometimes I come here and read some posts to get useful info or motivation although I never post (I don't know I didn't feel I have something useful to say). But today I really really need to talk here's the situation:
I feel depress and so ugly, even when I'm trying to eat healthy and exercise I feel is just not enough. I'm in a "relationship" right now and I think is driving me crazy (I'm going to the psychologist next week, so you can imagine how I feel) because according to him, he loves me and wants to be with me but he doesn't want to be in a serious relationship. But I've seeing him writing to some girls (really beautiful girls) asking her out and telling her stuff like he is looking for a real relationship. And I've come to the conclusion that he don't want to be in a relationship with me because I'm ugly, he even sometimes tell me that 'I'm fat' or that 'I look kind of ugly'.
I know how stupid this sound, but I feel horrible this is broken me badly. And lately I'm thinking he's right, guys aren't that interested on me and the few guys who are I don't like him back.
And this feel is affecting my work life, my social life, everything. I just have this feeling that I would ended up alone because I'm not skinny enough!!! and I hate it, I truly hate it.

If your profile pic is of you you have no problems in the looks department I assure you. And I honestly am not one of those people who go around saying nice things to make people feel better. I'm usually terribly sarcastic by nature.

I know plenty of 'ugly and fat' people inside and out who have no problem with getting guys. So that problem does not have to relate to looks. Once you see some terrible people with partners, those thoughts should leave you lol.

My heart goes out to you. I've been called ugly my whole life. I was beat up for it when I was a kid and I have scars on my face to prove it. I found a bf that made me think differently...life went on and eventually I was with someone for 2 years and it was the same situation. After those 2 long years of feeling completely unattractive he told me I was a beautiful person that he cared about and wanted the best for me but he wasn't sexually attracted to me. It cut me, deep. I really loved his family as well so that was also hard. I found pictures of girls (including ex's) in lingerie on his computer. I'm pretty sure he was cheating on me near the end with his current gf which is a long story. It's definitely left a war wound and confirmed what I thought my whole life. And I can't say I've found anyone since that made me feel attractive. I half blame that on me. It's hard to come off as sexy when you don't feel it, and that's half the game.

My advice is leave him, feel terrible. Eventually feel better because flirting with guys can be fun and therapeutic

um you're very pretty and he's a loser. never let a man tell you you aren't attractive.

^^this! If your man doesnt think you're the sexiest thing he can put his arms around, then kick him outta your life! You WILL find someone who adores you.

I have freckles, stretch marks, flab and a flat butt, but my hubby lets me know he adores me, flat butt n all. Dont put up with it, if he treats you bad now, he will never treat you better once you're 'skinny'..