Women with curly/kinky hair... anyone sick of it?

I've been relaxer free for 3+ years and it's been a journey lol My hair is a wild mix between 3 different cultures and at times I can't stand it.
I'm either at work (i'm a nurse) or I'm at the gym so my hair is usually up. Which means I have to use a TON of gel/products to slick it back. I get compliments but unfortunately I always have to hold myself back from saying "well ya, I can't stand it". I feel like the only people who compliment me on my hair are my older patients who have perms lol
I workout, eat right to look the best I can be... but then I don't do anything fun to my hair.
I spend at least 2x on products vs what I would spend on when I would always be in the salon.

I wear it down and straighten it once in a blue moon... but it's not the same...
I haven't been to the salon in a long time.... ever since I've been natural

Anyone in my shoes?

I want to get a relaxer and do something wild to my hair... BUT I don't want to regret it.
( I bought a curl softener kit but I'm scared to use it) I'm rambling on but someone has got to feel my pain

Replies

sagefitnessfanatic

YES! Welcome to my world. The positive - My hair is soooo much healthier in it's natural state - thicker, longer. I only straighten it once in awhile (hubby loves straight hair smh LOL). But bc I'm a gym rat, it reverts back to curly as soon as I break any type of sweat LOL So, I just "werk" the curly styles and when my body needs a 3 day+ rest/recovery, I straighten it : ) BTW, love your curly hair! You're beautiful!

SweetTeaAndCutoffs

I have curly hair that's slowly started to relax a little over the years. I use a combo of several different things, but nothing has made a huge difference. I had to comment because I think you are stunningly beautiful!!! You hair looks so good in your profile picture!!!

PhoenixJR

I love my curls. You can love your curls too, you just have to take care of them and unfortunately most hair advice is geared towards striaght hair.

1. Go buy a sulfate/silicone/paraben free shampoo and conditioner - I personally use Devacurl No-poo and conditioner. Sulfates are way too harsh for curls and silicone dries it out, both of these things are found in a lot of shampoos and conditioners and frizz products. Parabens are just gross.

2. DO NOT BRUSH YOUR HAIR. Especially when it is dry. brushing pulls out the curls and separates them, resulting in frizz. I run my fingers through my hair while it is wet and saturated with conditioner to get any tangles out. Then I put gel in it (silicone free), blowdry it with a diffuser (that weird attachment that kind of makes your hairdryer look like a raygun) and put a drop of almond oil at the ends. Then I do not touch it. Oh also don't towel dry it, keep it as sopping wet as possible and kind of squeeze the excess water out with your hands when you scrunch the gel into it. Then gently dry it with the diffuser.

I hope this helps.

MorgueBabe

I HIGHLY recommend reading http://www.amazon.com/Curly-Girl-Handbook-Michele-Bender/dp/076115678X and to STOP using ANY shampoo, and switch to JUST conditioners.

Also check out - http://www.naturallycurly.com/CurlyGirlChallenge

geerunz

I too have curly hair. I only shampoo about once every six-weeks. That helps witht the dry, frizziness. I rinse and just condition. Usually I do every other day and the of days pull it up. I've used a ton of different products. The best thing I've found is a good stylist. she cuts my hair dry and she too has beautiful curls. she has a web site "live curly, live free" with tips and stuff. Also there is a book called Curly Girl with lots of tips.

Your hair does look beautiful! Embrace it, there are tons of girls who want what you got

zaftiggirl

I 'wash' with a baking soda solution and 'rinse' with apple cider vinegar, and then top it off with a light leave-in conditioner - my hair has never been healthier! That way, when I *do* straighten it... it looks fantastic

French braids and head scarves are my best friend right now, and then I've gotten creative with bobby pins to work on some easy up-dos.

flatbellybella

I too have curly hair. I only shampoo about once every six-weeks. That helps witht the dry, frizziness. I rinse and just condition. Usually I do every other day and the of days pull it up. I've used a ton of different products. The best thing I've found is a good stylist. she cuts my hair dry and she too has beautiful curls. she has a web site "live curly, live free" with tips and stuff. Also there is a book called Curly Girl with lots of tips.

Your hair does look beautiful! Embrace it, there are tons of girls who want what you got

once every 6 weeks? what???
what about when you sweat at the gym? I always leave the gym soaked. I couldn't imagine not washing my hair

Beckboo0912

Ok! I'm in your shoes, well ok, my hair is just curly however I was takling to Jessie (my hair gilr about it) and she told me about this thermal relaxer but it doesn't get rid of the curly, it just tames the frizz. I don't mind my curly hair if it does what I want. Anyway, it's like 75 around me to do it and it last for 6 months, you use way less product. So it sound expensive but my sister did it in January and has only bought one can of mouse and a pump of hair serum and she can go days without washing washing it, if that makes any sense and it won't be crazy

Tamicejl

Be very careful with the apple cider vinager... that will strip your hair ..... and don't do it that often if you choose to .... cause it will make the hair weak.

cuterbee

I'd happily trade my baby fine hair that won't even hold a perm. *sigh*

Mimoki

check out curlynikki.com and her book "better than good hair" . I used to relax my hair now I've been natural for a few years. I don't have to gel or put too much product in my hair at all. I just put a bit of morrocan oil and it falls nice and big curls. Just research and experiment, trust me you will find what works best for your hair even though it looks awesome in your prfile pic lol!

MinnieInMaine

Technically I've been going natural with my hair for a long time but just recently started growing my bangs out. For years - I'm talking 20 or more - I would straighten my bangs with a round brush or curling iron and leave the rest curly. It was tough to part from the routine and start wearing my hair differently but after almost 2 months, I've fully embraced the change and can't wait until my bangs are fully grown so I can pull it all back.

One product I like for taming fly-aways is Redken's rough paste #12. You just need a little bit and it goes a long way. Tames the frizzies and has enough hold to keep the curls in check without a ton of other junk.

I haven't done a treatment in a while but I also really love Queen Helene's cholesterol. It's gross but it work so well!

zaftiggirl

Be very careful with the apple cider vinager... that will strip your hair ..... and don't do it that often if you choose to .... cause it will make the hair weak.

I only use a tablespoon diluted in a cup of water once a week, and it only strips your hair of dye if you've got colored hair.

jesusfreek14

The only way I wear my really curly hair is straight kinked or halfway pulled up... and yes I can get sick of it......

MorgueBabe

I too have curly hair. I only shampoo about once every six-weeks. That helps witht the dry, frizziness. I rinse and just condition. Usually I do every other day and the of days pull it up. I've used a ton of different products. The best thing I've found is a good stylist. she cuts my hair dry and she too has beautiful curls. she has a web site "live curly, live free" with tips and stuff. Also there is a book called Curly Girl with lots of tips.

Your hair does look beautiful! Embrace it, there are tons of girls who want what you got

once every 6 weeks? what???
what about when you sweat at the gym? I always leave the gym soaked. I couldn't imagine not washing my hair

You'd be surprised. I don't use shampoo often. http://youngblacknappyllc.wordpress.com/2012/09/16/cowash-natural-hair/ You really don't need it. Just an example; google how to CO wash/

Tinamac1

I have kinky curly hair and I love it! The bigger it is the more I love it! I didn't always love it tho I used to keep it cut short and iron it out everyday but I decided to go all natural about 2 and a half years ago and I'm so happy with my choice. The good thing about hair is you can change it up as much as you want. cut it, iron it, relax it whatever because it will always grow back kinky and curly! I do understand getting a bit bored with curly hair though, there are not to many hair styles we can have. You can have long curls, short curls, layer it or let it go and that's about it. Maybe play with the way you put it up?

TheMrsFitnessGeek

I am Dominican so I feel your pain. My hair was much curlier 3 years ago then I did the Brazilian Blowout

HATE IT! I want my crazy curly fro back. It is getting there but be careful what experimenting you do with your hair. Btw- I wash my hair daily unless it's straight then I wash it every 4-5 days. It's too cold to have it wet every morning but I do love my curly hair. Embrace the fact that YOU MS. have the best of both worlds

Nessiechickie

I have not had my hair down in its natural curly state
but my hair is very easy to straighten which I do a lot.
I love my hair can have it both ways

Mimoki

I too have curly hair. I only shampoo about once every six-weeks. That helps witht the dry, frizziness. I rinse and just condition. Usually I do every other day and the of days pull it up. I've used a ton of different products. The best thing I've found is a good stylist. she cuts my hair dry and she too has beautiful curls. she has a web site "live curly, live free" with tips and stuff. Also there is a book called Curly Girl with lots of tips.

Your hair does look beautiful! Embrace it, there are tons of girls who want what you got

once every 6 weeks? what???
what about when you sweat at the gym? I always leave the gym soaked. I couldn't imagine not washing my hair

You'd be surprised. I don't use shampoo often. http://youngblacknappyllc.wordpress.com/2012/09/16/cowash-natural-hair/ You really don't need it. Just an example; google how to CO wash/

Im aCO wash gal as well.

charc16

I have really curly hair - I never straighten it (ok, maybe once a year) and I use Ouidad products. They are expensive ($60 for gel, $50 for conditioner, I use a cheap grocery store shampoo), but it is the only thing that I have found that doesn't make me desperately hate my hair. I didn't discover it until I have 20 or so, and before that I would shower and just put my hair into a giant bun on the top of my head. Now I love wearing my hair down and I get all sorts of compliments.

Sometimes strangers ask if they can touch my hair, which is weird though...

spirytwynd

I am rocking the bald look. What hair I have is going grey or going away, so it is easier to simply shave it off. Be happy you have hair and enjoy it. I bet there are some curly styles you could enjoy. :-) Have fun with it. Life is a lot like stud poker, you play with the cards you are dealt.

alisonsouth

My daughter is mixed race and she has the same problem! I discovered the leave in conditioners by 'mixed chicks'..and they are a god send! i also use it on her hair as a styling serum (just run a small amount through her hair once dried).They have a ton of products,but this one worked well for her

I hope you find what you are looking for

x http://www.mixedchicks.net/ <--- try their link xxx

tyrantduck

ugh my hair is just a thick tangled MESS. i constantly keep it back in as tight of a ponytail as i can put it up in and have to slick it down with 1-2 tablespoons worth of super hold gel on top and pop in at least six strong hair clips near the base of the ponytail, otherwise i look like i just got done sticking a fork in a toaster. i HATE IT. i've had my hair thermally relaxed once and some locks have retained a bit of it, but the rest is...yuck. when wet it also comes down to the top of my butt so straightening it with nothing but my chi flat iron would take hours... and no matter how good it looks when i pull it back, the second i start sweating from exercising or doing physical labor at work, POOF. it's awful. i can't afford to get it relaxed again so i just kind of deal with it.

Cr01502

Only this one.

dym123

I wish I could have that cool curly look that I see other women have, but for some reason my hair goes flat at the top and flares out at ends as it dries. I look like Rosanne Rosanna Dana (and if you're to young to know this reference...google it)

edited to add: during the summer I do wear it natural, but end up putting it in a ponytail

geekyjock76

The kinkier the better, I say.

katy_trail

I love my hair. I don't really know what to do with it, since it's shorter than I'm used to, but it's wavy without me spending any money or time on it, and if I wanted it to be straighter, it is just by growing it out and or brushing it. I do want to try going red though :smokin:

spike90

SOOOOO sick of having curly hair all of my life. Had it straightened once and it looked horrible (looked like a giant "A")!!!!! I wish I didn't have to cake it in moose to keep it from frizzing all up and don't even think about taking a nap cause it will end up all tangled up and just plain bad!!!

Reinventing_Me

I'm also a curly girl and have been for 6+ years now. Although I don't straighten or color it, my hair is not thriving like it once was because I've been neglecting it. When stretched, it used to come close to my elbow. Wearing it down, bunning it, and twists caused massive tangles. Over the past few months, I've trimmed it back quite a bit, sometimes an inch at a time. I used to want to keep my length and see how long it would grow, but now, all I want to do is cut it to a length that is more functional and less tangly. I especially want to cut the back really short and maybe even taper it at the neck because that's the part that tangles the most.

ETA: My profile pic is from Spring 2007. This length was really easy to care for and what I might cut it back to.

SoViLicious

Under all this European silky weave my hair is in it's natural state.