How to Handle Unwanted Attention

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  • Illona88
    Illona88 Posts: 903 Member
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    I'm a writer so I do a lot of work at coffee shops, museums, venue lobbies etc.

    whats the point of being a writer if you can't be a writer in a public space so people will know you are a writer?

    I work in public spaces, because that's where the tables are. I don't have a desk or table at home.

    curious. so you expect privacy in public spaces?

    Not so much privacy, just not random men wrapping their arms around me while I'm writing.
  • Illona88
    Illona88 Posts: 903 Member
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    I'm a writer so I do a lot of work at coffee shops, museums, venue lobbies etc.

    whats the point of being a writer if you can't be a writer in a public space so people will know you are a writer?

    I work in public spaces, because that's where the tables are. I don't have a desk or table at home.

    :huh:

    Wait...you don't have a desk or table at home? Uhhhh, maybe invest in one? Or go old school and use the bed...if you don't have one of those either, the floor works wonders.

    I live in London, I don't have a desk or table because there is no space for one. And sitting on the bed only works for so long until your back starts to really hurt.

    I never said I have problems with working in museums etc. They're lovely places to work. It's just that occasionally you have to deal with people who just won't take a "no" when they ask you for your number.

    Why are so many people attacking me for where I work?
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
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    I'm a writer so I do a lot of work at coffee shops, museums, venue lobbies etc.

    whats the point of being a writer if you can't be a writer in a public space so people will know you are a writer?

    I work in public spaces, because that's where the tables are. I don't have a desk or table at home.

    curious. so you expect privacy in public spaces?

    Not so much privacy, just not random men wrapping their arms around me while I'm writing.

    Ummmm lol. Maybe you should video all this and make a sexual harassment video for each of the places you frequent. Sounds like the establishments and the town/city you live in could be #1 for sexual harassment.
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
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    I'm a writer so I do a lot of work at coffee shops, museums, venue lobbies etc.

    whats the point of being a writer if you can't be a writer in a public space so people will know you are a writer?

    I work in public spaces, because that's where the tables are. I don't have a desk or table at home.

    :huh:

    Wait...you don't have a desk or table at home? Uhhhh, maybe invest in one? Or go old school and use the bed...if you don't have one of those either, the floor works wonders.

    I live in London, I don't have a desk or table because there is no space for one. And sitting on the bed only works for so long until your back starts to really hurt.

    I never said I have problems with working in museums etc. They're lovely places to work. It's just that occasionally you have to deal with people who just won't take a "no" when they ask you for your number.

    Why are so many people attacking me for where I work?

    I was making helpful suggestions. I don't use a table either. I use my lap...with my laptop and work/write for hours just fine. This includes graphic creations, etc.
  • Cp731
    Cp731 Posts: 3,195 Member
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    I think some people confuse the polite wink and a smile of a perfect stranger with an aggressive sexual advance. Throw in a little delusion and ego and BAM, we have a problem Houston! Call Human Resources!

    Yeah, I think the same thing when women complain about "creepers" hitting on them at the grocery store. What that usually means is that some guy who wasn't super attractive said "Hi, how are you?" when he walked past. You know if it was a hot guy, the story would've been much different.
    HAhahahaha^^^^^^^^^^^^^

    On a rolllll!!!
  • Mmmmona
    Mmmmona Posts: 328 Member
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    tell them your gay
  • EllenKay63
    EllenKay63 Posts: 516 Member
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    So what you've done in the past isn't working anymore. Telling them straight out isn't working. I would continue to start with the "Thank you. I'm happily married" walk off and if they harass you then say "Look I don't want any trouble. Leave me alone. If they still won't leave you alone. Ask "Do I have to get a cop?" A look them straight in one eye. You'll have to look determined. You have to I MEAN IT look.
  • pnut456
    pnut456 Posts: 67 Member
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    Where do you live?
    I get NO attention.
    I need to move.

    Ditto kickrocks.gif

    ^^ This :ohwell:
  • diadojikohei
    diadojikohei Posts: 732 Member
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    I get a lot of attention at work, all the time. I have young men dropping by my shop and chatting for up to two hours at a time. I also have older men who come in and talk to me for hours. All ages, all backgrounds.

    I suppose it's because I run a gaming shop and for some of my customers I'm the only female who can't run away when they talk to them!!!

    Lol!
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
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    I'm a writer so I do a lot of work at coffee shops, museums, venue lobbies etc.

    whats the point of being a writer if you can't be a writer in a public space so people will know you are a writer?

    I work in public spaces, because that's where the tables are. I don't have a desk or table at home.

    curious. so you expect privacy in public spaces?

    Not so much privacy, just not random men wrapping their arms around me while I'm writing.

    i guess that makes sense. i remember my friends and i talking to a couple of british girls on a beach in Mallorca. they loved us because we just made small talk. they said that british guys will go up to a group of girls and just ask who is single and then just talk to those girls.

    'merica!!
  • JohnnyCashMoney
    JohnnyCashMoney Posts: 142
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    So...ummm...how YOU doing?

    That's just comedy right there.
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,012 Member
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    tell them your gay

    That's likely to get her more attention from guys. Heck if she said that up front I might have been interested.......
  • JohnnyCashMoney
    JohnnyCashMoney Posts: 142
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    Sometimes a throat punch is the only option. Apply ample force. They'll get the point. ; )

    Nice...
  • Jackson4590
    Jackson4590 Posts: 145 Member
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    solution: don't talk to men.

    in a man's mind talking = flirting.
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
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    solution: don't talk to men.

    in a man's mind talking = flirting.

    No.
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
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    solution: don't talk to men.

    in a man's mind talking = flirting.

    thanks for generalizing all of us. i appreciate it.
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
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    solution: don't talk to men.

    in a man's mind talking = flirting.

    I've seen this work the other way around far more often. Hum, maybe different people have different perspectives? Naw, couldn't be . . .
  • JustAboutDelicious_wechanged
    JustAboutDelicious_wechanged Posts: 2,487 Member
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    tell them your gay

    That's likely to get her more attention from guys. Heck if she said that up front I might have been interested.......

    Jac - I'm gay, come over and meet me and my GF.
  • JessieJanie
    JessieJanie Posts: 428
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    Start digging for gold

    either end will do


    I just died, reading that. You win.

    I'm sure that would get somebody to quit hitting on you.
  • be_dazzled
    be_dazzled Posts: 353 Member
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    Just smile sweetly and walk away

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