"the talk"

thatsillyshana
thatsillyshana Posts: 141
in Chit-Chat
For all the parents out there, how did you explain sex to your children? Or for all of the future parents/parents of young children, how will you talk to your kids?

My mom gave me a pamphlet and told me public school would teach me (it didn't) so now I'm trying to learn how to bring up sex without being embarrassed.
«13

Replies

  • kaylaandthestarcatcher
    kaylaandthestarcatcher Posts: 836
    My mom had a book. It was awkward.

    There's no way to do it that isn't awkward.

    I say, just ignore it and let the internet do the teaching.

    It's a good thing I'm never having children.
  • Brianna72994
    Brianna72994 Posts: 887
    My mom never really explained anything to me. When I started asking questions, she gave me a book, complete with pictures.

    I'd probably do the same. Less awkward! Plus they learn all that stuff in health class anyway
  • boothekm
    boothekm Posts: 60 Member
    My parents never had "the talk" with me. I learned through friends and school....and I think I turned out just fine. :happy: But in today's society, it's probably better to discuss it, however awkward it may be.
  • thatsillyshana
    thatsillyshana Posts: 141
    My mom had a book. It was awkward.

    There's no way to do it that isn't awkward.

    I say, just ignore it and let the internet do the teaching.

    It's a good thing I'm never having children.

    OMG, my mom had a book too, but it was useless!
  • PlayerHatinDogooder
    PlayerHatinDogooder Posts: 1,018 Member
    My dad just got me an escort.
  • pinkledoodledoo
    pinkledoodledoo Posts: 290 Member
    I went to public school and learned about it all there ... starting in like 4th grade. I probably knew more about it than my mom did!
  • MassiveDelta
    MassiveDelta Posts: 3,271 Member
    Basically: Insert Flap A into SLot B repeatedly until Flap A pukes a little
  • pseudomuffin
    pseudomuffin Posts: 1,058 Member
    My mom tried to give me the talk when I was 13 and I had already had free reign of the Internet for six years... That was a short conversation.
  • michellechawner
    michellechawner Posts: 892
    My mom had the talk with me. I kept giggling every time she said Penis.

    But public school taught me the rest. Since I started my menstruation at a very early age, I learned quicker than my other friends (I was 12).
  • Keiras_Mom
    Keiras_Mom Posts: 844 Member
    I figure if my daughter's old enough to ask about, she's old enough to know about it in an age-appropriate way. We've had several talks over the last few years, each of them building on the last, and when she's expressed an interest to learn. Most recently, she typed in "s-e-x" on the computer and was mortified that she ended up on an illicit site. She's 8! She asked me to fix it, so then we had another talk. At this point, she's more interested in "seeing" the anatomy, because talking about it just hasn't answered her questions. So I went and got her 4 different books geared toward girls her age. They have pictures and illustrations, as well as advice on how to deal with the changing body, what happens during puberty, how babies are made, on and on.

    I asked if she wanted us to read them together, or if she wanted to read them herself and then ask me questions. She opted to read them herself, and she has since asked for a little bit of clarification, but told me they were really helpful. I'm blessed that she feels she can come to me, and that she trusts me enough to give her the truth. I try not to make it a big deal.
  • Morninglory81
    Morninglory81 Posts: 1,190 Member
    My mother was very direct and I think she enjoyed the fact that it was so awkward. She felt if you have to talk about it with your mom she is at least one image that pops into your head when you are considering things. It worked for me I was scarred till I was19. My brothers had it so much worse than me and my mom thought it was funny!
  • KevinLamb77
    KevinLamb77 Posts: 87
    No Talk, I just watched Porn......
    I'm just straight up honest with my kids....if they ask I answer, if I see something that they need to know I tell them.
  • livingfortheone
    livingfortheone Posts: 273 Member
    This is kind of easy... kids are naturally curious. They'll open up a window to this conversation by asking where they came from, or where babies come from.
    Give them just the information that they need... in order to ask more questions.
    This helps you know what part they are understanding and not understanding.
    Never give them too much information and don't talk over their head.
    You want to foster openness in that discussion.
    And for goodness sake, don't get embarrassed... you had this kid somehow... were you embarrassed when you conceived?
  • capnrus789
    capnrus789 Posts: 2,736 Member
    I think a trip to the zoo in springtime is all it will take.
  • jess7386
    jess7386 Posts: 477 Member
    I plan on integrating it into normal conversation throughout my child's life. For example, teaching the child the proper names for anatomy, the differences between boys and girls, etc. when they are old enough to talk/point these things out. As my child becomes curious about sex/babies, I plan on telling them the truth and answering all questions honestly. There isn't anything inherently shameful about sex and children are naturally curious, so I don't see what's wrong with giving them a full explanation (without overloading them with specifics). I plan on explaining what sex is to my children before they're exposed to it through school & other mediums.

    May sound extreme to some, but I think age-appropriate sex education should start when the kid is able to understand basic concepts and should be a conversation that continues indefinitely.
  • MudRunLvr
    MudRunLvr Posts: 226 Member
    I let my daughter know it's not an option.
  • thatsillyshana
    thatsillyshana Posts: 141
    I figure if my daughter's old enough to ask about, she's old enough to know about it in an age-appropriate way. We've had several talks over the last few years, each of them building on the last, and when she's expressed an interest to learn. Most recently, she typed in "s-e-x" on the computer and was mortified that she ended up on an illicit site. She's 8! She asked me to fix it, so then we had another talk. At this point, she's more interested in "seeing" the anatomy, because talking about it just hasn't answered her questions. So I went and got her 4 different books geared toward girls her age. They have pictures and illustrations, as well as advice on how to deal with the changing body, what happens during puberty, how babies are made, on and on.

    I asked if she wanted us to read them together, or if she wanted to read them herself and then ask me questions. She opted to read them herself, and she has since asked for a little bit of clarification, but told me they were really helpful. I'm blessed that she feels she can come to me, and that she trusts me enough to give her the truth. I try not to make it a big deal.

    I wish my mom was that open! <3
  • Mr_Bad_Example
    Mr_Bad_Example Posts: 2,403 Member
    How will I explain sex to my child?

    HBO
  • jess7386
    jess7386 Posts: 477 Member
    I figure if my daughter's old enough to ask about, she's old enough to know about it in an age-appropriate way. We've had several talks over the last few years, each of them building on the last, and when she's expressed an interest to learn. Most recently, she typed in "s-e-x" on the computer and was mortified that she ended up on an illicit site. She's 8! She asked me to fix it, so then we had another talk. At this point, she's more interested in "seeing" the anatomy, because talking about it just hasn't answered her questions. So I went and got her 4 different books geared toward girls her age. They have pictures and illustrations, as well as advice on how to deal with the changing body, what happens during puberty, how babies are made, on and on.

    I asked if she wanted us to read them together, or if she wanted to read them herself and then ask me questions. She opted to read them herself, and she has since asked for a little bit of clarification, but told me they were really helpful. I'm blessed that she feels she can come to me, and that she trusts me enough to give her the truth. I try not to make it a big deal.

    you sound like a great mother! :)
  • JT_Taylor_99
    JT_Taylor_99 Posts: 72
    Basically: Insert Flap A into SLot B repeatedly until Flap A pukes a little


    This is the best explaination ever!!!!!
  • thatsillyshana
    thatsillyshana Posts: 141
    How will I explain sex to my child?

    HBO

    That how my bf learned.....:indifferent:
  • christabel6
    christabel6 Posts: 173 Member
    My mum gave me The Talk about periods because I had seen the adverts in women's magazines and had no idea what they were for. We had lessons in school and she also bought me a book.

    I'm glad she told me - a friend whose parents didn't tell her about periods thought she was bleeding to death when they started. Plus, you don't learn about contraception from porn.
  • meeper123
    meeper123 Posts: 3,347 Member
    I got my time of the month at 7 my mom was completly unprepared not her fault who would think to explain all that to a 7 year old so when it happened i thought i was injured and went crying to my teacher she was shocked and took me to the nurse who gave me a very scientific explanation. It worked well and let my mom still be able to teach me the emotional side. I think i will teach my kids early to avoid this kind of crisis a very simple brief explanation.
  • thatsillyshana
    thatsillyshana Posts: 141
    I plan on integrating it into normal conversation throughout my child's life. For example, teaching the child the proper names for anatomy, the differences between boys and girls, etc. when they are old enough to talk/point these things out. As my child becomes curious about sex/babies, I plan on telling them the truth and answering all questions honestly. There isn't anything inherently shameful about sex and children are naturally curious, so I don't see what's wrong with giving them a full explanation (without overloading them with specifics). I plan on explaining what sex is to my children before they're exposed to it through school & other mediums.

    May sound extreme to some, but I think age-appropriate sex education should start when the kid is able to understand basic concepts and should be a conversation that continues indefinitely.

    I love it! Especially proper names!
  • bronx1101
    bronx1101 Posts: 48
    My daughter is 11 and finishing up 5th grade next week. When she came home from school a few months ago asking me what "it" is because she heard about it from other less sheltered (and probably less supervised) kids, I told her the truth. So, recently when the school sent out consent forms to educate the girls on their bodies and what not, she told them no thanks and that she had a mom who could handle it when the time came. I agreed with her.
  • dogo187
    dogo187 Posts: 376
    u must be watching Dr Phil too... :)
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
    My mom tried when I was 11. I was embarrassed but she wasn't.
    I already knew it all from friends mostly, and was still at the age that sex and everything related was completely gross, and I sure didn't want to dissect it with my mom. lol

    So I told her I knew and escaped. lol
  • jess7386
    jess7386 Posts: 477 Member
    I plan on integrating it into normal conversation throughout my child's life. For example, teaching the child the proper names for anatomy, the differences between boys and girls, etc. when they are old enough to talk/point these things out. As my child becomes curious about sex/babies, I plan on telling them the truth and answering all questions honestly. There isn't anything inherently shameful about sex and children are naturally curious, so I don't see what's wrong with giving them a full explanation (without overloading them with specifics). I plan on explaining what sex is to my children before they're exposed to it through school & other mediums.

    May sound extreme to some, but I think age-appropriate sex education should start when the kid is able to understand basic concepts and should be a conversation that continues indefinitely.

    I love it! Especially proper names!

    Thank you. The proper names comes from my sister referring to her vagina as a "front bum" at the age of 13. No. Lie.
  • thatsillyshana
    thatsillyshana Posts: 141
    My mum gave me The Talk about periods because I had seen the adverts in women's magazines and had no idea what they were for. We had lessons in school and she also bought me a book.

    I'm glad she told me - a friend whose parents didn't tell her about periods thought she was bleeding to death when they started. Plus, you don't learn about contraception from porn.


    That friend sounds like my cousin. I thought she kept sitting in ketchup! It took me years to figure out what happened!
  • thatsillyshana
    thatsillyshana Posts: 141
    I plan on integrating it into normal conversation throughout my child's life. For example, teaching the child the proper names for anatomy, the differences between boys and girls, etc. when they are old enough to talk/point these things out. As my child becomes curious about sex/babies, I plan on telling them the truth and answering all questions honestly. There isn't anything inherently shameful about sex and children are naturally curious, so I don't see what's wrong with giving them a full explanation (without overloading them with specifics). I plan on explaining what sex is to my children before they're exposed to it through school & other mediums.

    May sound extreme to some, but I think age-appropriate sex education should start when the kid is able to understand basic concepts and should be a conversation that continues indefinitely.

    I love it! Especially proper names!

    Thank you. The proper names comes from my sister referring to her vagina as a "front bum" at the age of 13. No. Lie.


    ahahahaaaa! its better than vajayjay, hoo-haa, lady bits, or whatever else they call it.

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