"the talk"

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24

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  • thatsillyshana
    thatsillyshana Posts: 141
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    How will I explain sex to my child?

    HBO

    That how my bf learned.....:indifferent:
  • christabel6
    christabel6 Posts: 173 Member
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    My mum gave me The Talk about periods because I had seen the adverts in women's magazines and had no idea what they were for. We had lessons in school and she also bought me a book.

    I'm glad she told me - a friend whose parents didn't tell her about periods thought she was bleeding to death when they started. Plus, you don't learn about contraception from porn.
  • meeper123
    meeper123 Posts: 3,347 Member
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    I got my time of the month at 7 my mom was completly unprepared not her fault who would think to explain all that to a 7 year old so when it happened i thought i was injured and went crying to my teacher she was shocked and took me to the nurse who gave me a very scientific explanation. It worked well and let my mom still be able to teach me the emotional side. I think i will teach my kids early to avoid this kind of crisis a very simple brief explanation.
  • thatsillyshana
    thatsillyshana Posts: 141
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    I plan on integrating it into normal conversation throughout my child's life. For example, teaching the child the proper names for anatomy, the differences between boys and girls, etc. when they are old enough to talk/point these things out. As my child becomes curious about sex/babies, I plan on telling them the truth and answering all questions honestly. There isn't anything inherently shameful about sex and children are naturally curious, so I don't see what's wrong with giving them a full explanation (without overloading them with specifics). I plan on explaining what sex is to my children before they're exposed to it through school & other mediums.

    May sound extreme to some, but I think age-appropriate sex education should start when the kid is able to understand basic concepts and should be a conversation that continues indefinitely.

    I love it! Especially proper names!
  • bronx1101
    bronx1101 Posts: 48
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    My daughter is 11 and finishing up 5th grade next week. When she came home from school a few months ago asking me what "it" is because she heard about it from other less sheltered (and probably less supervised) kids, I told her the truth. So, recently when the school sent out consent forms to educate the girls on their bodies and what not, she told them no thanks and that she had a mom who could handle it when the time came. I agreed with her.
  • dogo187
    dogo187 Posts: 376
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    u must be watching Dr Phil too... :)
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
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    My mom tried when I was 11. I was embarrassed but she wasn't.
    I already knew it all from friends mostly, and was still at the age that sex and everything related was completely gross, and I sure didn't want to dissect it with my mom. lol

    So I told her I knew and escaped. lol
  • jess7386
    jess7386 Posts: 477 Member
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    I plan on integrating it into normal conversation throughout my child's life. For example, teaching the child the proper names for anatomy, the differences between boys and girls, etc. when they are old enough to talk/point these things out. As my child becomes curious about sex/babies, I plan on telling them the truth and answering all questions honestly. There isn't anything inherently shameful about sex and children are naturally curious, so I don't see what's wrong with giving them a full explanation (without overloading them with specifics). I plan on explaining what sex is to my children before they're exposed to it through school & other mediums.

    May sound extreme to some, but I think age-appropriate sex education should start when the kid is able to understand basic concepts and should be a conversation that continues indefinitely.

    I love it! Especially proper names!

    Thank you. The proper names comes from my sister referring to her vagina as a "front bum" at the age of 13. No. Lie.
  • thatsillyshana
    thatsillyshana Posts: 141
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    My mum gave me The Talk about periods because I had seen the adverts in women's magazines and had no idea what they were for. We had lessons in school and she also bought me a book.

    I'm glad she told me - a friend whose parents didn't tell her about periods thought she was bleeding to death when they started. Plus, you don't learn about contraception from porn.


    That friend sounds like my cousin. I thought she kept sitting in ketchup! It took me years to figure out what happened!
  • thatsillyshana
    thatsillyshana Posts: 141
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    I plan on integrating it into normal conversation throughout my child's life. For example, teaching the child the proper names for anatomy, the differences between boys and girls, etc. when they are old enough to talk/point these things out. As my child becomes curious about sex/babies, I plan on telling them the truth and answering all questions honestly. There isn't anything inherently shameful about sex and children are naturally curious, so I don't see what's wrong with giving them a full explanation (without overloading them with specifics). I plan on explaining what sex is to my children before they're exposed to it through school & other mediums.

    May sound extreme to some, but I think age-appropriate sex education should start when the kid is able to understand basic concepts and should be a conversation that continues indefinitely.

    I love it! Especially proper names!

    Thank you. The proper names comes from my sister referring to her vagina as a "front bum" at the age of 13. No. Lie.


    ahahahaaaa! its better than vajayjay, hoo-haa, lady bits, or whatever else they call it.
  • kdsp2911
    kdsp2911 Posts: 170 Member
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    My mom had the talk with me. I kept giggling every time she said Penis.

    But public school taught me the rest. Since I started my menstruation at a very early age, I learned quicker than my other friends (I was 12).

    A VERY early age is 9...yes... thank you Mother Nature for that gift.
  • ExploreLoveRide
    ExploreLoveRide Posts: 17
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    My mom had a book that she skimmed through with me. Unfortunately, she was uncomfortable, and it showed, so I didn't learn much. I didn't think I was able to ask her anything. Instead, I ended up learning about everything through reading books and then in my Sex Ed classes at school (they started around fourth grade for me).

    As for myself and my future kid(s), like many of the other people who've posted, I hope to be more open about it (I feel it's necessary, as sex is becoming a huge part of pop culture), and I want to present the information in such a way that makes me open and approachable for the child/children.
  • jacklis
    jacklis Posts: 280 Member
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    Two teenage boys, started talking openly with them about everything and anything they asked as soon as they were able. Used proper names for everything, never criticized them for anything they asked, never laughed at anything they asked.
    We talk about masterbation at the dinner table, if that's what they wanna talk about, I give them straight answers and don't care what they ask about as long as they keep talking to me and my husband about what's on their minds.

    edited to say: If they get gross and graphic at the dinner table I ask if we can talk when I am done eating... :sick:
  • abbyrae1
    abbyrae1 Posts: 265 Member
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    No matter how you do it, it will probably be awkward. My mom took me to a class for Moms and Daughters; I think I was like 8 years old...I was embarrassed but it was a good way for me to learn about puberty and sex in a safe environment that was informative (it was at a local hospital, free class I think). As I got older, I became more comfortable with talking to her about things; she and I never felt like sex was a taboo topic of conversation.... I think if you establish open communication with your kids they will be more likely to talk to you about things they might have questions about. My mom was always realistic about things with me too; she said obviously I want you to wait until you get married but if you have questions let me know; protect yourself, etc. this made it easier to talk to her about things.
  • sullus
    sullus Posts: 2,839 Member
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    I've got 2 boys. "The talk" was:

    Close your door.
    Flush your tissues.
    Let mom continue to live in the world in her head where HER boys don't do this.

    But in all seriousness - one time my eldest asked me "so what makes the white stuff come out?" I started into an explanation of nerve endings, pleasure receptors, emotional factors, all leading up tot he moment of ..

    he says "no no no. which muscle pushes it out?"

    Ohhhhhh!! an easy question!! Ok so there's this series of sphincters ...
  • thatsillyshana
    thatsillyshana Posts: 141
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    u must be watching Dr Phil too... :)

    I wish I was watching it! I'm taking a human sexuality course and I feel a little peeved that everyone knows what they're talking about, but I know very little because talking about sex was pretty much banned from my house.
  • Flab2fitfi
    Flab2fitfi Posts: 1,349 Member
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    I'm just open with my kids and give them appropriate information for their age when they ask questions. I also have quite a few books laying around the house about where babies come from - aimed at different age groups which they like to read. i dont think there is a ny difference talking about sex then any other subject -its natural and important part of life. we also talk about how sex is special and relationships being important etc.

    Sometimes if I'm watching something on TV about relationships I'll ask my teenager if he has anything he wants to know and we have had good chats about relationships etc.
  • sweetpea03b
    sweetpea03b Posts: 1,124 Member
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    Wow. I don't look forward to this at all... probably because my parents sucked at teaching me this stuff. My mom gave me a book that talked about the feelings and blah blah blah but I was REALLY confused about what exactly sex was... I think I ended up looking it up online or something. I think the book idea is a good source of information if it actually INFORMS.

    But, openly talking about sex was never an option in my house. My parents stopped talking to me when I moved in with my boyfriend when I was 21. So.. yeah. I think just being open and talking about it will avoid a lot of issues in the future. Obviously you don't want to hand your kid a box of condoms and say "have fun" but making them feel embarrassed or ashamed of it only makes things worse and lead to unprepared, early sex having (IMHO).

    Good luck!
  • KristysLosing
    KristysLosing Posts: 683
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    My mom read me the book she had gotten at school when she was my age. She later bought a couple of books which are wonderful and I hope to share them with my kids when they get a little older. It will probably be a little awkward regardless...but maybe if you keep your cool and act like it's not so awkward, maybe that will promote a relaxed atmosphere? Maybe, maybe not. But it's worth a try! They were called something like "What's happening to my body?" and "Where did I come from?"
  • jessmart83
    jessmart83 Posts: 283 Member
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    Unfortunately I have already had to have a G rated sex talk with my 5 year old. Her friend who is 6 was having Barbie and Ken have sex. So naturally my daughter came home wanting to know what sex was. Plan on having another one in a few years, at least she kind of knows what it is now. But told her it is something she probably shouldnt openly discuss in Kinder.

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