Why did you let yourself go?...

I just didn't care enough about myself. Yep, this is it. I think we take care of everyone but ourselves. I also had parents who made me feel like I didnt matter.

For most people weight gain is gradual. Some people might not realize they have gained weight until stepping on a scale for the first time in years.

Of course this is more plausible for someone who has gained 10 pounds than for someone who has gained 100+

Health is so much more than just a number. We should all be monitoring other areas of out health/fitness as well.

I built a layer of insulation around myself, literally and figuratively. Now that I'm comfortable with who I am, I no longer need that insulation. I'm shedding it a pound at a time.

There are a few factors. I lost weight in my early 20's and looked great. Then I got pregnant and really bounced back well and looked great by his first birthday. Then I slowly gained about 10-15 pounds back in a few years after and got pregnant with my second.

The second pregnancy... I used the excuse of being pregnant to eat fast food...eat all the sweets I wanted etc. so I gained about 25-30 pounds. And ever since he was born a couple years ago..I never lost the weight. I just kept my habit of eating fast food and eating sweets.

boyfriend wanted me fat
stress
started emotional eating
stopped dieting/starving
stopped exercising
luv food eating contests

Denial then once I realized how much I gained(pair of shorts that were too big before were now too small) I thought "maybe I'm supposed to be fat" but that was just my dumb excuse to keep on eating.

depression and lazy, and after giving it more thought I come from a generation where our parents hammered to clean our plates no matter if we were full or not. Grew up on high starch food. We have come a long way on healthier foods since the 50's.

Two very (naturally don't work at it at all) skinny sisters - Realizing I was never going to look like them so I might as well be a complete slob. Terrible thought process

Then in middle school I was raped and I didnt want to feel attractive anymore because of it. Terrible thought process again

I don't dwell on either, they both got me HERE and HERE is a great place to be.

My family has been pretty heavy as far back as I can remember, but only because we've all had an eating problem. My mom was sooo skinny before having her 2nd child (she lost all the weight after me ^_^ xD) but she started to put on the weight after that.... and my dad started putting on the weight after he got out of the Coast Guard. We would eat 2-3 servings of food per person a meal, and we all have sweet teeth. So I've always struggled with my weight, but at least back before my 20's I was the smallest of my family of 5 (even though I was the oldest sibling, and the 2nd tallest)

The first time I moved, I moved to the city and quickly lost weight. I wasn't eating as much, I was constantly on the move, and just generally being a bit healthier. But then I moved back home and sank back into my old habits, and put on a bit of weight again.

Then I moved out to my boyfriends' with his Grandma... I felt like a total stranger most of the time, rarely left my room, and even more rarely left the house except for work. I also finally got my license and started driving places instead of having to walk.

The last straw was a fairly difficult pregnancy, where I lost almost 20lbs from constant throwing up, and then had to gain it all back, plus more >_< Afterwards, I was put on bed rest... and just decided that was the last straw, apparently I was not meant to be skinny.

But now, I have a son who refuses to stop moving, and I want to keep up with him. I want to be healthy and teach him to be healthy. and I want to feel desirable again, my fiance loves me for who i am, heavy or not, but I want to love myself too... and I can't. Plus... my little sister and I are close in weight now... and I want to at least still be able to claim skinniest of us all xDD

TL;DR: Always been heavier, moved, and stopped getting out as much as before, then had a baby.

I ask myself the same question regularly, and I'm still not sure if I have an answer I'm happy with. It's a very deep question.

Sometimes I tell myself it's because I had kids, but 50kgs is a lot of "baby weight" to be carrying four years later, and truth be told, I gained 10kgs with the first, and stayed the same with the 2nd, so I gained in between and after.

Sometimes I tell myself that I got comfortable, and stopped caring so much because I wasn't putting myself out there (in the dating world) anymore. I've gained the majority of my weight in the nearly 5 years I've been married, so it's plausible.

Sometimes I blame it on the depression. I got depressed after a miscarriage in 2010, which got worse after I suffered another miscarriage. I ate for comfort, hoping that I'd stop feeling empty.

Sometimes I dismiss it because everyone in my family (on both sides) is overweight or obese, so it's "in my genetic code" to end up built like the rest of them.

Mostly, I think maybe it is a mix of all of the above, thrown in with some serious self esteem issues and a hormonal imbalance that makes it easy to gain and 10x harder to lose. I figured, why try to run against the tide, when it's easier to just go with the flow. I'm lazy, I'm unmotivated, and I really didn't care enough to try to put the effort in. I use food as a crutch. I eat when I'm sad, angry, tired, bored, happy, and just because I can. I think you really need to want it to take the leap to start, and I've never been sure that I actually want it enough.

Because our society allows mothers to use pregnancy and having children as a valid excuse to get fat and stay that way. Pure and simple. I used my children as an excuse to not work out.

I love this!!

When I complain about my weight people say, 'you have had 2 kids' but I know deep down that the weight is there because i have eaten too much and moved to little for the last few years!

I dint even know what is in style now! That is how long its been since i went shopping. Ive been hiding behind my glasses and ponytail/bun for YEARS!

I avoid the camera too..... It is jarring sometimes to see myself how i am instead of how i was before...in my head im still not soo fat

Because drinking was my priority. I did not realize I was letting myself go until I got sober. I did not realize what horrible things I was doing to my body. I loved drinking and I did it a few nights a week. I never intended to drink the whole bottle of wine, just a glass, but before you knew it, I justified drinking the whole thing, then a few beers after that.

So then bad food choices are made, which we justify as okay because I was never going to drink like that again. Of course exercise on a consistent basis was out of the question. And the cycle continued and it was okay, after all, I was only hurting me.

One day I woke up and realized it was not okay for anyone else to hurt me, why was it okay for me to hurt me?

I stopped drinking and started making one change in my life at a time. After I started getting better with the food, I added in a little bit of exercise, 2 miles a day, then 3, then 5 then I started running.

<<<<< 5 years and 35 weeks later, (actually 34 weeks because I took this pic last week) this is what is happening.

Physically: I wasn't paying attention to how much I was eating and how little I was moving and the ever loving freshman 15 *cough* 30 *cough*. Psychologically: When I was smaller it put me into a lot of awkward situations that I wasn't ready to deal with, maybe wasn't equiped to deal with. It was easier to blend in being bigger. I went from a size 2 to a size 18 in six years.