BOYS SUCK!
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And this^^ A lot of people so ready to condemn this guy for the smallest of transgressions, seriously a lot of trust issues relating to cheating...not saying this may not be the case, but a lot of you were so ready to say leave him with such little real information. All I can say is communication is the real issue here, about what she wants and what he wants.While it is not the best thing to do in a relationship to be out with the guys all night, I also don't think he's in the wrong. I know thats not the general consensus here but... he was (I'm assuming) like that when you met him. You would like him to change (not always a bad thing) but he's holding on to it.
I say ask him to come home after a certain time because you worry. Talk to him and ask him rather than tell him. If this thing is bothering you a LOT then I guess might be time to break up although since I personally have seen many bad relationship (hard drug users, women beater, good for nothing mooches, pimps etc) I'd say its a small thing to worry about.
Ask him to slowly decrease the amount of pot he's smoking since its not the best thing to do or maybe ask the friend to spend some time at your place but make sure the friend knows to leave home after a certain time.
ETA: The cheating accusations are downright disturbing and disgusting. I'm very glad that you don't think its cheating.0 -
They already have talked. She stated this is an ongoing argument. Red light, he may not be cheating and may just really want to joke illegal substances and hang out in a sausage fest all night, but their comes a time in a boys life when he must man up and give up his sausage for his ladies bed. She has obviously made it clear that his habits are not healthy, and for a long term relationship they are NOT, and he hasn't changed. rED FLAG. Imagine having a kid with this guy. Have fun raising the child on your own while he's getting high at a pals house.
As someone said. Ditch the boy, find a man. By the way she obviously knows he smokes he can't smoke at home???? Wtf?0 -
I was this person, you know, except I'm a chick.
My husband and I have completely separate sets of friends, and never the twain shall meet. :brokenheart: I like to party and his partying days are over. So I used to go out at night without him. OFTEN. I was never cheating, I was safe with my girlfriends usually at one of their houses. But he would get jealous, and we talked about it. We're stronger because of it.
If you really care about this guy and want/see a future with him, my best advice is to see if a compromise can be reached. This situation will only become worse if there is no communication. :flowerforyou:0 -
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He does. Getting high with his buddies.
OP, if it bothers you and and he won't stop, you have two choices, right? Accept it, or move on. You're probably not going to move on, so...he's going to go smoke up with his friends while you go to bed alone.
Sounds like a depressing scenario to me.
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This^0 -
i appreciate everyones comments, but to be honest nobody knows my relationship and I don't know anybody elses relationship.. We have a great relationship besides this and you may all think what you want but I know he is not cheating. He has changed ALOT since we first started dating.. He used to smoke way more and now he only does like once a month.. I literally got into the fight with him and came on here and typed out my feelings because i was upset.. of course i still am but you guys dont know our relationship and as much as everybody wants to assume hes cheating, there still are plenty of GOOD guys out there.. yes he is probably sitting at his friends house just playing music and possibly smoking not like other *kitten* who go out to bars and hit on every possible thing with 2 legs. but anyways.. really just wanted to vent quick and did not think people would say as much as they did..
yeah i dont understand all the HE IS CHEATING screamers. Give the guy a break not every man lies and cheats. I say if he only does it once a month or so give him his day or ask him if they can meet sooner. I also rage when my boyfriend rather stays up to play his stupid computer games then come to bed with me but hey what can you do. got to learn to live with it maybe make a set day and have a ladies night for you when he goes out :flowerforyou:
"what can you do?"
You can find a man who'd rather do you than play a video game..
Why not both?
I knew I liked you.0 -
i appreciate everyones comments, but to be honest nobody knows my relationship and I don't know anybody elses relationship.. We have a great relationship besides this and you may all think what you want but I know he is not cheating. He has changed ALOT since we first started dating.. He used to smoke way more and now he only does like once a month.. I literally got into the fight with him and came on here and typed out my feelings because i was upset.. of course i still am but you guys dont know our relationship and as much as everybody wants to assume hes cheating, there still are plenty of GOOD guys out there.. yes he is probably sitting at his friends house just playing music and possibly smoking not like other *kitten* who go out to bars and hit on every possible thing with 2 legs. but anyways.. really just wanted to vent quick and did not think people would say as much as they did..
yeah i dont understand all the HE IS CHEATING screamers. Give the guy a break not every man lies and cheats. I say if he only does it once a month or so give him his day or ask him if they can meet sooner. I also rage when my boyfriend rather stays up to play his stupid computer games then come to bed with me but hey what can you do. got to learn to live with it maybe make a set day and have a ladies night for you when he goes out :flowerforyou:
"what can you do?"
You can find a man who'd rather do you than play a video game..
Why not both?
I knew I liked you.
:smokin:0 -
i appreciate everyones comments, but to be honest nobody knows my relationship and I don't know anybody elses relationship.. We have a great relationship besides this and you may all think what you want but I know he is not cheating. He has changed ALOT since we first started dating.. He used to smoke way more and now he only does like once a month.. I literally got into the fight with him and came on here and typed out my feelings because i was upset.. of course i still am but you guys dont know our relationship and as much as everybody wants to assume hes cheating, there still are plenty of GOOD guys out there.. yes he is probably sitting at his friends house just playing music and possibly smoking not like other *kitten* who go out to bars and hit on every possible thing with 2 legs. but anyways.. really just wanted to vent quick and did not think people would say as much as they did..
yeah i dont understand all the HE IS CHEATING screamers. Give the guy a break not every man lies and cheats. I say if he only does it once a month or so give him his day or ask him if they can meet sooner. I also rage when my boyfriend rather stays up to play his stupid computer games then come to bed with me but hey what can you do. got to learn to live with it maybe make a set day and have a ladies night for you when he goes out :flowerforyou:
"what can you do?"
You can find a man who'd rather do you than play a video game..
Or woman0 -
Every night? Or once in a while? if it's every night...I can see how that'd be annoying. If it's once in a while, you should let him have that freedom.0
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He sounds immature...maybe its time to trade in the "boy" for a MAN? :laugh:0
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You can defend him all you want, but please see the BIG RED FLAG and move on! Three years is enough time to waste!0
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Stop dating boys and upgrade to a man. Just saying :-)
^^^^This :bigsmile:0 -
What dude does that? Lol
When my woman says we're going to bed, I'm in bed before she gets up off the couch, naked and tenting the covers. Lol.
I'd say it's weird. He's not necessarily cheating, but he has priorities higher than you, and in this case, I'd say, long term, it's going to be a problem.
Definitely this!!! "The right man will love about you all the things thre wrong man was intimidated by." Take it from experience, you don't even realize all the concessions YOU'RE making for HIM, and he doesn't give a damn. Dropkick this loser.0 -
why does everybody think hes cheating. he MIGHT be cheating. probably hes hitting the bong and playing battlefield 3 like my brother does. every day of his fricken life.
ladies, some times the ones you catch, arn't keepers, and as much as you try, you cant make them into the guy you want them to be.
^^This! Obviously smoking pot is more important to him than his family, and unfortunately - you. If you knew he was a pothead when you started dating you can't really use it against him now. Either you change together, or grow apart. You have to ask yourself if you want to spend the rest of your life with someone who prefers getting high than spending quality time with you.0 -
Only if you ask nicely.0
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lol i know it sounds like he may be cheating but i know hes not.. he goes there to smoke pot sometimes and it bothers the hell outta me.
I believe you. He's not cheating, unless, MaryJane is the other woman. LOL
He's just having a bromance with some bud. You should go join them. Hang out and watch their shenanigans. Could be fun. If he doesn't let you go, then maybe, he is cheating.0 -
i appreciate everyones comments, but to be honest nobody knows my relationship and I don't know anybody elses relationship.. We have a great relationship besides this and you may all think what you want but I know he is not cheating. He has changed ALOT since we first started dating.. He used to smoke way more and now he only does like once a month.. I literally got into the fight with him and came on here and typed out my feelings because i was upset.. of course i still am but you guys dont know our relationship and as much as everybody wants to assume hes cheating, there still are plenty of GOOD guys out there.. yes he is probably sitting at his friends house just playing music and possibly smoking not like other *kitten* who go out to bars and hit on every possible thing with 2 legs. but anyways.. really just wanted to vent quick and did not think people would say as much as they did..
Did you not think that you would get responses when you posted this? You should know better than to post something and not expect a variety of responses and opinions.0 -
Stop dating boys and upgrade to a man. Just saying :-)
:drinker:
Yep. This one isn't worth the 3 years you've given him. Move on.0 -
Stop dating boys and upgrade to a man. Just saying :-)
Listen to this guy ^^ true
Seems that your relationship is not right ..You know it and he may too !0 -
Start smoking pot.0
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That's a red flag the size of Road Island, with dynamite strapped to the flag post.
IMO
Randomness but in Rhode Island there is a traditional food called dynamites. LOL Just thought I'd throw out that little fun fact!
OP: Ive been with mine for about 2.5 years and mine does things purposely to get me going like whistling or making certain noises or stupid kindergarten stuff that send me flying over the handle and usually results in my yelling my head off to get him to get the point that it pisses me off to the nth extent. I feel your pain!0 -
It's obviously not a good thing.
Something similar happened to me with my last girlfriend, actually. Let's just say that it didn't end well (less pot, more other guy, however).0 -
What dude does that? Lol
When my woman says we're going to bed, I'm in bed before she gets up off the couch, naked and tenting the covers. Lol.
I'd say it's weird. He's not necessarily cheating, but he has priorities higher than you, and in this case, I'd say, long term, it's going to be a problem.
This is my husband (except he locks up the house first). We always go to bed together, we lay there for a little bit and just really connect (verbally or otherwise :laugh: )0 -
Stop dating boys and upgrade to a man. Just saying :-)
^ this0 -
Next time, try dating a man.0
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Only if you ask nicely.
Pretty please.0 -
I just have to vent for a second and I am wondering if anybody feels the same.. I've been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years now and I love him very much but he does things that piss me off or drive me crazy and I can't take it! We live together and instead of coming to bed at night he goes over to his friends house.. It just bothers me like crazy! And thats not even all of it =[ Just feeling frustrated!
Serious question: how often do you initiate sex? I guarantee if you tell him "I'm horny, so I wouldn't disappear after dinner if I were you," that dude ain't going anywhere.
Otherwise, move out. Find other things to do with your time when he's not around. He will mysteriously start making more of an effort. He knows you're at home in bed waiting for whenever is convenient for him, and this is why he's at his friend's house.0 -
Give him this:
Being single is fun when you're still young and hot. Take advantage.0 -
He sounds immature...maybe its time to trade in the "boy" for a MAN? :laugh:
A guy wants to stay out and he's immature? I think you're looking for a spineless doormat rather than a man.0 -
Drop that zero and get with a hero....yep, I took it there
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Stop dating boys and upgrade to a man. Just saying :-)
best advice0
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