getting over a relationship
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grieve your loss
take time to heal
focus on your own happiness
open your mind and heart to allowing someone new in
live life every day seeking love all around you and new love will come to you
never give up on believing in yourself and love
enjoy life and joy will surround you0 -
Go to the gym... hit the weights
That's the best remedy I had so far.... you finish it feeling stronger and the best part is, at night, you can sleep like a baby :flowerforyou: 0 -
Time, girls nights out, delete all ways of contact, delete all old text and emails. Focus on yourself :-)0
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Enjoy being single! Think of the time you will have to do WHATEVER you want. It is the one time in your life when you can totally focus on YOU. go explore your city, plan a trip, take up a new sport or hobby. Have fun!!0
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Work out like a beast. When you find yourself getting depressed, get off your *kitten*, go to the gym or for a bike ride.0
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give yourself one day to have a really good cry. Let it all out and then set a goal and go for it!0
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Definitely this. It helped me a lot after I did this, I would try to get him out of my life, give in and go through months of the same bs and general mind ****ing he put me through. After i cut him out completely it was still hard but i managed. Just keep yourself busy and surround yourself in friends and family (positive people) and find someone who can be "your person" the kind of person you can call at any time when you need a talk, good luck with getting over itDelete them off facebook, delete their phone number, delete their photos from your phone.
I could not move on until I did this. Any time he contacted me, it brought me back to square one. Trust me, cut him out.
Also i find exercise is a great lift for your mood
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Definitely agree with deleting them from your social networks and phone, you need a clean break and seeing them is just a reminder of everything you had felt, when your really over them and you feel like you want to be friends you can always contact them again. I'd say pick up a hobby, keep busy and really get into your exercise. Maybe start writing in a journal before you go to bed write down everything you are feeling, that way you are getting it all out in a good way. Good luck :flowerforyou:0
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Keep busy and definitely obtain a few "new" friends
j/k
Just focus on yourself and have fun in the process take it as a time to celebrate 0 -
Delete them off facebook, delete their phone number, delete their photos from your phone.
I could not move on until I did this. Any time he contacted me, it brought me back to square one. Trust me, cut him out.
Also i find exercise is a great lift for your mood
All of this.0 -
Get :drinker: and hook up with a good friend.0
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time.0
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Sex....0
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Two words. "Revenge diet." Although I don't think of it as dieting anymore, just a healthy lifestyle. Refocus on you. Be good to yourself. Cardio works better than therapy and is cheaper.0
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cliché #101023359: the best way to get over a man is to get under a new one.0
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Me personally, I would not delete their photo and destroy any photos of that person - that is history of your life (a part that is hurtful now) but down the road, it gives you the opportunity to look back on your life and see how far you have come. By all means store the photos away until such time, that is a part of your life that cannot be erased. Delete from Facebook, of course.,Delete them off facebook, delete their phone number, delete their photos from your phone.
Also i find exercise is a great lift for your mood
I agree with this, after my breakup I deleted him from Facebook but I still have the pictures (although I don't look at them pining away or anything, lol). I also see that as history & would hate to delete them now & regret it later. And yes, work out whenever you feel down about it, it's better in the long run than binging on something that's bad for you!0 -
Get a workout routine and stick to it. i commited to my excercise after my breakup and it got me in the best shape of my life, and gave me something to focus on besides my ex.0
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AWESOME. I love a good break up story.
Mine - I lost almost 20kg and met the love of my life who I've been with for the past 2 years. Also had the satisfaction of having my ex (who was a massive see-you-next-tuesday) begrudingly tell me that I was "looking really good" and ask me out again. Not ashamed to say that rejecting him was all too sweet!
Awesome!!0 -
Rules for breakups as per Moi:
- don't speak to the person for a minimum of 30 days following the break up. If you find the urge to call them, call a friend and talk it out. Delete number, facebook, MFP, email, etc to make sure NO CONTACT is to be had - ESPECIALLY NO DRUNK DIALING! If they call you don't answer and have a friend check the message and have them delete it so you don't hear their voice.
- get out of the house. go out with friends, keep busy, work out more, make new friends - whatever you do, keep busy!
- make yourself happy. if there is anything you couldn't or wouldn't dare do while you were in the relationship - do it now... you now can! exp. my ex hated the fact that I was always approached for photoshoots - so, I decided I was going to go and be in the Toronto Sun as their "Sunshine girl" after he and I broke up
- Never blame yourself... whatever you do, don't start to think too much and think of how you could have prevented the break up - that doesn't help YOU
- "It's called a Breakup Because It's Broken" - great book! Read it
- Invest in YOU... remember, the only person that takes care of you is YOU
- I always had an animal to help me cope with breakups... I walked my dog constantly and she got a ton of exercise at the time which helped her and me get out of the house and keep busy
I have more, but that should do for now.
OH and if you're a woman (sorry I didn't check), the book called "Better single than sorry" Jen Schefft - I will NEVER regret buying that book and having read it over and over again until it finally sunk into my brain.
GOOD LUCK!
P.S. I don't agree with this method, but I've also been told "To get over one man is to get underneath another."0 -
Time and space is what did it for me. And keeping myself busy with work, school, and the gym. We also lived together so the move definitely took up a lot of my energy/time for the first little while.
Depending on how much time and energy you had invested into the relationship can have a huge impact on how long it takes to get over it. For me, it took a good couple of months after we went our separate ways until I was able to look at him and not feel sad. The breakup was amicable but after 5 years together, it's hard to let something like that go easily. You don't just lose a partner but a friend too.
I'm thankful to say that we are back to being friends again and we're definitely better off that way. I took the time I needed to be single and get to know myself again, and am happy to say that I'm with someone who is awesome and much more compatible
So, long story short, what you do to get over your relationship is going to be based on what you enjoy doing and what you can put all of you energy and time into. Mine was a combination of school, work, and working out. Let yours be what you need it to be and you'll find yourself over them in no time 0 -
get out there and exercise!! look for a new women's workout class. join a hiking group on the weekends. join a recreational softball or soccer league (great place to meat new people). sign up for a few personal training sessions. just make appointments/commitments that are hard to break. focus on making yourself better and before you know it you will be feeling awesome!
this is the perfect time to make a change now that you are single. no one to get in the way or complain you're spending too much time at the gym. do what makes you happy!0 -
I have recently got out of an abusive both mentally and physically marriage. The day the police arrested him for leaving me for near dead was the day I started to move on. For the past three months though I have been living with the memories of the abuse and all of the horrible names that he used to call me. I have had to get counselling to get me through but I have done it, now his horrible names that he called me is spurring me. I agree though to get rid of everything. I had a huge bonfire one evening and that was me taking control of my life again. Now I am happier than I was 6 years ago when I first met him and no-one will ever control me like that again but it will take time to go into a new relationship to trust someone new. I don't agree with what some people are saying about just going out and getting laid, no matter how many people you sleep with it still doesn't hide the hurt and pain you will go through and why hurt someone else too? Anyways good luck to you there is a light after the tunnel0
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workout and spend time with friends. best thing in my opinion. Exercise releases dopamine and endorphins, which make you feel good and it helps make ya look good too having a couple friends around to chat when you need to is always nice.
Good luck!0 -
I hate when I go to answer on a post.. everyone has the same answer. Lol jk!
But yes...
Time is all you need.
And you need to cut off all contact.0 -
TIme. It gets easier and you'll be over it before you know it. I like to think back to all the 'losses' I've had and marvel how ok with them I am now, even though at the time I was devastated.0
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You know... all the old cliches:
"Things happen for a reason."
"When one door closes, another one opens."
"It's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."
Seriously though, whatever the reason for the break-up, if you think about it long enough, I'm sure you will realize that you are better off. Get out and do some things with friends. Take up a new hobby. Take on some task that you have been putting off. Focus your energy on you.0 -
soooo any know the best way to get over a relationship that doesn't include excessive food and booze?!?!? i need all the help i can get - totally amicable but somehow it still hurts???
I'm in the same boat as you. My 3 1/2 year relationship ended last week and it's been really hard. Not amicably because he did me really wrong - so I'm struggling with not being very angry at him. So I'm working on letting the anger go so I can just focus on myself and heal.
It will be very hard, but you will just wake up one day and decide you are ready to go about your business. Give yourself time to grieve the loss of your relationship, it's OK to be sad. Find things to do that make you happy and try to stay busy. It will take time.0 -
ugh, I wish I could move on...so I just beg him to stay....I'm weak.0
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I set myself a goal of completing a 10k - never done anything like that before. Every day when I got home from work I would hit the pavements taking my hue and frustration out on them. By the time I got back, cooled down and had dinner it was almost bed time,so no time to sit thinking about what we would have done if he had been there. Also I was so physically tired that I slept better. Didn't solve everything but kept me busy and away from the booze.0
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Focus on something that makes YOU feel better. For me, that has been focusing on my workouts and goals. Instead of worrying over the relationship, put all of that energy into your workouts. It's like that saying, "Worrying is like a rocking chair. You can rock all day long, but you never go anywhere." Find something that leads you somewhere you want to be!!!0
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