Embarrassing injuries.

I broke my arm when I was 5 - falling on a pillow. Try having your mom explain that to the ER nurse who happens to be my aunt... and my aunt was laughing. To this day, I still get asked "so how did you break your arm since you fell on a pillow?" (Note - i landed with all my weight on top of my arm...)

When I was a teen I broke 3 toes running into a dining room chair. They were purple and blue for DAYS.

Then in college when studying for pre-nursing school finals (I ended up changing my major anyways) I cracked a bone in my foot while going down the stairs... I twisted it funny and the side of my foot was blue and yellow for about a week. I couldn't wear my boots to work, so they put me on dispatch for about 3 weeks because I couldn't be in the field without shoes (I was an EMT). The minute I tried to put shoes on I would SCREAM in pain.

And this was NOT me, but a kid I went to high school with was playing with his friends and they lived next door to each other and were hopping fences goofing off when he jumped over the fence and landed in a bush awkwardly and he tore his *kitten*. It needed like 3 stitches if I remember. I figured after that he's never jump a fence again without seeing what was on the other side...

When I was substantially larger, I slipped off my shoe (1 inch heel) and broke my foot.

My husband was fixing his parents' roof, crouched down and impaled his high upper thigh on a lightning rod (lucky miss).

I was having a little bit of rough sex and my (now ex) boyfriend ripped me a little.... level 1, 2 stitches and butt pillow.... yowch

the most embarrassing part was telling the er doc why....

Wondering how many FR you will receive asking if he's seeing anyone yet...

Tried shaving the hair off my toes the other day in the shower, and the razor slipped. I somehow managed to slice off a bit of my pinky toe. Worked out in sandals and a band-aid that day.

Not really an injury but how about cramps (muscle cramps) while doing the deed. Cramps bad enough that things have to come to a screeching halt.

This was over 10 years ago. I was out of college but still living in a college town. Some friends and I decided to have a night out on the town and I offered to be the DD for the night. Made our rounds at the bars and then decided to go to an after party at a friends house. As we were getting ready to leave, I was walking out the front door to the porch steps and saw a friend I had not seen in AGES. I got so excited that I started bounding down the porch stairs and somehow missed the last two stairs entirely. Remember the 2 stairs part.

Now I'm clumsy and fall a lot anyway and have a tendency to sprain/twist my ankles (I've always said I inherited my grandpa's weak ankles), so I thought this was just another twisted ankle and I'd be fine by morning. I had to call around to find someone to come pick up me and all of my drunk friends since I drove a stick and couldn't press down on the clutch lol. Everyone got home safely and I went to bed.

The next morning I woke up having pretty much forgotten the injury I sustained from the night before. That is until I tried to stand up to go to the restroom. I put weight on my leg and screamed and fell to the floor. Had to call my dad and my brother to come and get me and take me to the ER to get an xray. Find out that I had broken my leg/ankle in three places. Actually split my fibula bone and was told that it required surgery. The surgeon told me that I had to go on bed rest for a month to get the swelling to go down so that he could perform the surgery. Apparently if I had gone right after it had happened he would have performed emergency surgery before the swelling set in. But by that point my leg was so swollen he was afraid he wouldn't be able to sew me back together lol. Oh and nobody in the ER would believe that I was sober when this happened. I was asked multiple times by ER people if I had been drinking.

I now have 11 screws and a large plate in my leg from falling down 2 stairs while completely sober. My family still teases me about it.

I had a year and a half of physical therapy before I was able to walk "normally" again. I have no ankle to speak of on my left leg. I can feel the screws inside my leg (I still gag when I have to shave over the area where the plate is). My leg aches when the weather changes and sometimes the screws feel like they get a little out of place and I have sharp pains and trouble walking. I've thought about having the screws and plate removed but can't stomach the idea of another surgery like the last one!

Needless to say I am much more careful these days when going down the stairs. :-)

two years ago, I was having a little bit of rough sex and my (now ex) boyfriend ripped me a little.... level 1, 2 stitches and butt pillow.... yowch

the most embarrassing part was telling the er doc why....

You win.

Ouch,Agree WINNER!

I tried photobombing one of my friends by jumping (literally) into his video, but landed in a pothole and rolled my ankle so badly I let out a bloodcurdling scream that was caught on his tape. We were in a public place and I had to be carried out.

Two years later during the Insanity warmup, I rolled the same fcuking ankle. It didn't break either time and now it's just ugly and huge.

I was about 13 when I was at a restaurant and saw a rat behind the toilet. Zipped up fast... too fast and ran out the door with my hands covering my unmentionables screaming like a little girl. I'm just glad everything still works.

I had a vasectomy, the Doc told me to take a week off , no heavy lifting, blah,blah,blah

I played a Hockey tournament 5 days afterwards, the moring after the tournament
I woke up to one regular sized testicle and one the size of an orange. Telling the FEMALE ER doc was very interesting/embarrassing

I was using resistance bands to do arm curls. I wanted to up the resistance so I thought I'd give myself less band and pull harder. At some point, the band snapped and I punched myself in the head.

lmao!

I was moving a twin box spring in too much of a hurry, stepped off of a curb and, yes, broke my foot.....I wasn't convinced it was more than just a bad sprain until I could no longer put on my shoe and my foot was the color of a nasty black eye.....

When I was younger, my mom and I were going grocery shopping together. I stepped out of the car and the door began closing before I could stop it. My entire right hand was stuck in the locked door so there was absolutely nothing I could do. My mom assumed I was right behind her and hadn't noticed until she was already a few cars over and heard me begin screaming for her. Of course, she then had to simultaneously quiet me and fish the keys out of her purse to unlock the door (and we all KNOW how most moms' purses are a bottomless pit). I stood there sobbing uncontrollably until she could pry my fingers from the inside of the door. It was utterly humiliating at the time (and painful too)!

When I was five I climbed on a huge empty metal container (we grew fruit for sale and it's meant to go on a tractor or truck). I fell in and broke my arm.

I sprained my ankle on a school trip at age 16 when we were locked inside the room for too long. I didn't know how high the window was and jumped out. I landed right at the kids who were hiding and smoking behind the building. They ran away screaming into the woods.

There was that little episode I had with the French courtesan, 23 pounds of strawberry jam, a tricycle and a pair of dice. But it is such a common tale I don't want to bore you with the details.

Oh yea that................I hate when that happens.