Wanting to be physically attacted.....

135

Replies

  • BrklynTico
    BrklynTico Posts: 143
    Been saying this for years. No one looks across a bar and says, "Damn! I bet he/she can start one hell of a conversation."

    It all starts with physical attraction. If it ends there, then it's a problem.
  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
    So I'm married to a man 25 years older then me.. and with age the metabolism slows and age wrinkles appear and you might even lose hair. I think my hubby is the most handsome man on this planet and I find him attractive in every aspect. However according to you since my hubby is the age he is and doesn't have the body of a young fit thing, I dont have the whole package... mind telling me what I'm missing then??
    if YOU find him physically attractive then isn't that exactly what the OP would call the whole package? if you found him unattractive would you be married to him?
  • Cp731
    Cp731 Posts: 3,195 Member
    You can't make a cake with flour alone. And you can make one without flour, but it tastes a helluva lot better with it.

    an even more betterest with frosting
  • lostdogg
    lostdogg Posts: 450 Member
    You can't make a cake with flour alone. And you can make one without flour, but it tastes a helluva lot better with it.

    an even more betterest with frosting

    And betterestest with ice cream on the side
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  • JenCatwalk
    JenCatwalk Posts: 285 Member
    So I'm married to a man 25 years older then me.. and with age the metabolism slows and age wrinkles appear and you might even lose hair. I think my hubby is the most handsome man on this planet and I find him attractive in every aspect. However according to you since my hubby is the age he is and doesn't have the body of a young fit thing, I dont have the whole package... mind telling me what I'm missing then??
    if YOU find him physically attractive then isn't that exactly what the OP would call the whole package? if you found him unattractive would you be married to him?

    Of course I have the whole package.. I was just clearing up some possible misunderstanding that having someone who might not have the most physically attractice body means you dont have the whole package. Because there's so much more to love then physical appearance.
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  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
    Oh. Physically "attracted." I honestly read this as physically "attacked" and thought this was going to be a juicy one. Never mind.
  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
    So I'm married to a man 25 years older then me.. and with age the metabolism slows and age wrinkles appear and you might even lose hair. I think my hubby is the most handsome man on this planet and I find him attractive in every aspect. However according to you since my hubby is the age he is and doesn't have the body of a young fit thing, I dont have the whole package... mind telling me what I'm missing then??
    if YOU find him physically attractive then isn't that exactly what the OP would call the whole package? if you found him unattractive would you be married to him?

    Of course I have the whole package.. I was just clearing up some possible misunderstanding that having someone who might not have the most physically attractice body means you dont have the whole package. Because there's so much more to love then physical appearance.
    to you he is the most handsome man on the planet though... that's how she wants to feel.
    all of us have a different idea of what makes a person physically attractive. me? a guy could have what some might consider disfiguring facial scars, but i find them attractive. that doesn't make me any more or less shallow than anyone else. one person's unattractive is another person's handsome.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    loving all the catty judgements on the OP for being honest.
    if attraction wasn't an issue then we'd all be bi.

    People are bi because they are attracted to both genders, not because attraction doesn't matter. Bi people still have preferences and won't just have sex with anyone.
  • Cp731
    Cp731 Posts: 3,195 Member
    You can't make a cake with flour alone. And you can make one without flour, but it tastes a helluva lot better with it.

    an even more betterest with frosting

    And betterestest with ice cream on the side

    drizzle...

    ETA. remember, no one expects me to do anything, if Im not interested I just walk away from the flirting or the advance. I figure those are the men too that have the most confidence, because I surely don't see that behavior coming from most younger, more better looking men. I very rarely get hit on by anyone my age.
  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
    loving all the catty judgements on the OP for being honest.
    if attraction wasn't an issue then we'd all be bi.

    People are bi because they are attracted to both genders, not because attraction doesn't matter. Bi people still have preferences and won't just have sex with anyone.
    obvious post is obvious.
    i know why i'm bi. because i can find people of both genders attractive.
    and if physical attraction wasn't an issue, then everyone would be dating bi, because what their inability to find one gender attractive wouldn't matter.
    but, ooo, i still have preferences? how shallow!
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    loving all the catty judgements on the OP for being honest.
    if attraction wasn't an issue then we'd all be bi.

    People are bi because they are attracted to both genders, not because attraction doesn't matter. Bi people still have preferences and won't just have sex with anyone.
    obvious post is obvious.
    i know why i'm bi. because i can find people of both genders attractive.
    and if physical attraction wasn't an issue, then everyone would be dating bi, because what their inability to find one gender attractive wouldn't matter.
    but, ooo, i still have preferences? how shallow!

    I'm bi also.

    I'm not sure if you are responding to me, or just in general. I don't think you are shallow. I have preferences also.
  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
    loving all the catty judgements on the OP for being honest.
    if attraction wasn't an issue then we'd all be bi.

    People are bi because they are attracted to both genders, not because attraction doesn't matter. Bi people still have preferences and won't just have sex with anyone.
    obvious post is obvious.
    i know why i'm bi. because i can find people of both genders attractive.
    and if physical attraction wasn't an issue, then everyone would be dating bi, because what their inability to find one gender attractive wouldn't matter.
    but, ooo, i still have preferences? how shallow!

    I'm bi also.

    I'm not sure if you are responding to me, or just in general. I don't think you are shallow. I have preferences also.
    i am responding to the amount of absurd in this thread.

    ps. how you doin?
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    loving all the catty judgements on the OP for being honest.
    if attraction wasn't an issue then we'd all be bi.

    People are bi because they are attracted to both genders, not because attraction doesn't matter. Bi people still have preferences and won't just have sex with anyone.
    obvious post is obvious.
    i know why i'm bi. because i can find people of both genders attractive.
    and if physical attraction wasn't an issue, then everyone would be dating bi, because what their inability to find one gender attractive wouldn't matter.
    but, ooo, i still have preferences? how shallow!

    I'm bi also.

    I'm not sure if you are responding to me, or just in general. I don't think you are shallow. I have preferences also.
    i am responding to the amount of absurd in this thread.

    ps. how you doin?

    :wink:
  • ksavy
    ksavy Posts: 271 Member
    You can't make a cake with flour alone. And you can make one without flour, but it tastes a helluva lot better with it.

    an even more betterest with frosting

    And betterestest with ice cream on the side

    drizzle...

    ETA. remember, no one expects me to do anything, if Im not interested I just walk away from the flirting or the advance. I figure those are the men too that have the most confidence, because I surely don't see that behavior coming from most younger, more better looking men. I very rarely get hit on by anyone my age.

    I rarely get hit on by anyone my age, or even older than me for that matter. I seem to attract the 21-22 year old guys. I don't really get it.
  • BeachGingerOnTheRocks
    BeachGingerOnTheRocks Posts: 3,927 Member
    OP, did someone get offended that you weren't attracted to him and call you shallow? Sorry if that happened. If you like younger, that is your prerogative.

    We are all attracted to what we're attracted to. You shouldn't apologize for it.
  • chinalavy
    chinalavy Posts: 104
    I love looking at men who are physically attractive, however man with average looks with a great sense of humor and the ability to make me feel safe, secure, confident and attractive would be extremely sexy to me. That is the total package for me.
    So true!
  • iorahkwano
    iorahkwano Posts: 709 Member
    Next, I think your quote would make a good T-shirt: "I am NOT going to let some guy I find physically unattractive put his penis in me." It's fun and practical.

    On a serious note, dating someone you aren't physically attracted to is kind of a waste of time for both people. Anyone telling you differently is either insecure about their personal level of attractiveness or trying to rationalize why they married their partner. (Yes, I sometimes enjoy throwing fuel on the fire.)

    I enjoyed this^

    I think a lot of people misunderstood this thread and turned it into a "black and white" issue as opposed to one with a gray area. Looks vs. Personality, and let's shame everyone who defends "looks." I don 't think the OP said looks solely mattered, mattered most or overpower other traits. That was everyone else's assumptions. Not sure why they chose to focus on that point.

    I think the need for physical attraction probably depends person by person, just the way some people are picky and some aren't. I know some people who can date someone they're not attracted to and after a couple months "will learn" to find them attractive. Other people need the physical attraction upfront or else it's difficult for them to connect. This doesn't mean looks matter most to them, just that it helps.

    I find I need to be at least a little physically attracted. If not, and I force myself to try, it really feels fake. Like I'm putting on a fake show for them and I just lose motivation for the entire thing. But what one finds "physically attractive" doesn't mean "perfect." In fact, my friend thinks every guy I like is gross & I think all the guys she likes look like girls so it 's all relative in the end :)

    Personality has ruined good looking men, for me. And personality as helped average looking men!
  • msladydove
    msladydove Posts: 33 Member
    At my age of 51, I dont think a penis is going to help me lose weight..... lol ... Seriously though, If I was married, it wouldnt be any of anyones business what my hubbies penis looked like.
  • Call me crazy but I often find myself attracted to guys that arent my "normal type" or dont rate a perfect 10. Ive learned in life that looks are not everything. I mean... if you are so repulsive that I cant even look at you, then thats one thing.. HAHA. But in my list of things I am looking for in my prince charming.. good looks doesnt top the list. If someone is there for me when I need them, is someone I can trust and feel safe with, and someone that genuinely cares about ME.. that is what I find attractive. Oh.. and someone that can make me laugh. =-)
  • Personality has ruined good looking men, for me. And personality as helped average looking men!


    YESSSSSS!!! VERY TRUE for me too!!!!
  • eric_sg61
    eric_sg61 Posts: 2,925 Member
    Lol@ the amount of times the word 'package' is used ITT
  • southerndream24
    southerndream24 Posts: 303 Member
    Nothing wrong with wanting what you want. I'm pretty sure my list of non-negotiables is full of things a lot of people would find shallow. At the end of the day I know what works for me and they don't. It's about me being happy and if someone has a negative opinion about it they can go kick rocks.

    In my city there are some HOT 40-something year old men walking around. Totally have been on a couple dates with some and I'm 27. Do what works for you.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    You can't make a cake with flour alone. And you can make one without flour, but it tastes a helluva lot better with it.

    no actually flourless cake tastes pretty good.
  • lauraleighsm
    lauraleighsm Posts: 167
    You know, when you're not stuck on looks, you find that people become attractive because of their traits. It's the little things-the way they laugh or small mannerisms or the way they treat you. That's what matters to me. I grow into my attraction, just like I grow into attachment or love.

    It's not called "wanting the whole package". It's called not being shallow.

    Exactly!
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    Well from experience ..i kinda hate all the perfect/hot women their personality makes them look like snails in my eyes i would only have a good times with them an that's it nothing more ..maybe not all of them have bad personality but all the good looking women that i have been with were all ugly from the inside ...so i would Date/marry an average or less women with a good personality ..but that's just me .

    yeah but how often are you really gonna look at their inside? what are you an OB/GYN? A radiologist?

    Also unsure how being perfect/hot also makes them slow and leaving gooey trails, but yeah, carry on. You should write a dating book. And when you do you can tell how when you have a good times with them you can explain how hating all the perfect/hot women should NOT translate into them having a bad personality towards you. Cause just in case you didn't know perfect/hot women are equally as capable of detecting when they are being hated as the most ugly women in the world are. Mostly because they are NOT snails and thus still have eyes and can see the eyes of hatred staring back at them. That is unless you are trying to distract them with your wallet, huge clock, or "shiny".
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    Oh ffs.
  • pghtrader
    pghtrader Posts: 44 Member
    That is unless you are trying to distract them with your wallet, huge clock, or "shiny".

    Got something you might like right here:
    http://thebigclockstore.com/product-category/huge-clocks/


    Here are a few of their most popular/favorites:
    Milano Chunky
    Galway Black Clock
    Salt and Pepper Clock (in case you like them a little older)
    Simply White Clock
    French Tower Clock (surely they're just bragging)

    (Sorry I just... couldn't .... resist.)
  • Pixi_Rex
    Pixi_Rex Posts: 1,676 Member
    I can see how you should be selective...

    You know you seem like the whole package, a real catch.
    You can't even spell attracted.

    If you didn't have TFMG I would totally ask you to marry me right now lol