What did they mean by this? Can't stop crying

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  • sweetchildomine
    sweetchildomine Posts: 872 Member
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    Why do you care what 2 random people shouted from a van? Move on

    this!

    It's great that you have the confidence to not care what anyone says, but not all of us are at that point yet. Words CAN hurt if it's something that you're sensitive about. Some people, like myself, who have lost weight, still have a self esteem complex. Even though I've lost the weight, sometimes I fear that it's not good enough. If someone yelled something out the window at me that I interpreted as saying I was too fat, I would be upset too.

    God, some people have no empathy at all.

    To the OP, I don't think they were saying you're fat. I think they were referring to your lady bits. lol In my opinion, you have nothing to worry about because you are FAR from fat but I COMPLETELY understand how you feel because I'm going through the same thing myself. It takes awhile for your brain to realize that you're not still overweight. Even if those guys DID mean it like that, they were just jerks who like to be mean to random people for entertainment, just like the people on here that have basically said that you're fishing for compliments. I know it's easier said than done but just keep your head high and ignore them. :)
  • luceegj
    luceegj Posts: 246 Member
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    Coz they are low lifes who drive around in a van trying to make everyone else misrable coz they are pathetic!
  • saschka7
    saschka7 Posts: 577 Member
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    I can't imagine that's what they were really saying, either--like a lot of other people said, you're lovely! But I know how it feels to have a random person shout out something that seems insulting and it making your cheeks burn and causing you to feel fretful.

    I once was out for a summer's walk in a pair of shorts (which were short but not unreasonably so, at the time was 145 lbs and 5 foot 10) and I passed next to a daycare and a little boy about 5 years old was standing a few feet away from me hollered "Hey, hoochie-mama!" REALLY loudly. I was so embarrassed. Then I realized that as a little kid, he had no idea what that meant and had probably heard that at home aimed at any woman wearing shorts.

    Sometimes Logic isn't the first thing to intercept comments and put them in a reasonable perspective--it's Emotion which always puts the worst spin on things.

    Again, you're lovely! Don't give it another thought! :flowerforyou:
  • lj8576
    lj8576 Posts: 156
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    are you british? I always hear people on British movies saying OI there. I think its kind of funny
  • Skinny_minny_mo
    Skinny_minny_mo Posts: 1,272 Member
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    I wont repeat what all the others on this post have said, i.e that you are beautiful and i think that the guys were trying to flirt with you (oops i just did epeat it) :smile:

    but i think your reaction to it has more to do with your self-esteem and how you feel and value yourself. You see yourself as fat and therefore heard what you already think from those guys - regardless of what they meant.

    Hear me out, I'm not criticising you. I have a warped idea of how i look and feel too. The thing about healthy self-esteem is that one is able to sift out meaningful and good comments and give other comments the attention it requires IF IT requires it. Your reaction to these comments - random guys who dont know you - seems out of proportion. And i imagine that you wont really belive all the wonderful comments that people are making on here, possibly dismissing it as they dont really know how you look in the morning etc.

    Forget about those guys or anyone elses comments - start focusing on how YOU feel. How you see yourself. Build your self-esteem and resiliency.

    It's all about self-love :heart:
    :flowerforyou:
  • OllyReeves
    OllyReeves Posts: 579 Member
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    ummmm..... I have heard that "bacon" is used as a crude reference for a ladies "you-know-what".
    So they were probably just being typical offensive white van men (disclaimer - there are polite respectful white van men in the world!)

    Whatever they meant, ignore and move on. What you're up to and what you look like has nothing to do with them anyways!

    I reckon this is closest to the truth. In my (limited) experience of shouting out of vans it's never normally a put down, they would of wanted to get a rise out of you. You can either stick a finger up and then they may shout something derogatory, just wave and smile and they'll give you another toot on the horn or just shout back and ask them "how their little co*cks are?"

    What planet are you on. No one has ever in the history of the world shouted 'Oi love, how's the bacon' to anyone anywhere. In the world ever.

    I repeat. Grow up. Welcome to life. 2 guys in a van shout something to a girl on the street, it's normally complimentary, if crude, but I think you're basically just looking to be offended.

    Twas ever thus. Whine about it as much as you like.
  • xinit0
    xinit0 Posts: 310 Member
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    I've thought about this before... "Man, what if someone calls me fat still?"

    I think I'd laugh at them, because if they think THIS is fat, they should have seen me 5 months ago.
  • xampx
    xampx Posts: 323 Member
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    I don't have empathy for this. You think I haven't been called things over the years? I don't let it bother me. If I did I would be a jibbering wreck! And I don't have time for that.

    Also, the OP just sent me hate mail! I find this amusing.
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
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    It's a couple of *kitten* hats in a van who could have meant any number of things, none of which is relevant to who you are or how you look.

    You do look great!

    So work on bringing your confidence up in line with your appearance.
  • Kymmu
    Kymmu Posts: 1,650 Member
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    1. You are gorgeous-
    2. Bird is the word.
  • legreene515
    legreene515 Posts: 276 Member
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    They were cat calling you. It was a compliment. And a size 6 is awesome, so I'm sure you are not fat!!!
  • sweetchildomine
    sweetchildomine Posts: 872 Member
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    I don't have empathy for this. You think I haven't been called things over the years? I don't let it bother me. If I did I would be a jibbering wreck! And I don't have time for that.

    Also, the OP just sent me hate mail! I find this amusing.

    Again, just because YOU have great self esteem doesn't mean that she does. The OP has stated that she has suffered from disordered eating and self esteem issues. It's probably going to be a struggle for her FOREVER to see what everyone else does. It really bothers me that people are being rude about it because I know exactly how she feels. I cry about things people say to me about my body all the time. I know I shouldn't but that's something I need to work on. I not an issue of "Just get over it". You can't "Just get over it". It's something you have to work on. I kind of understand that some people look at her and are like "WTF, that's stupid that she cares someone said she's fat because shes OBVIOUSLY tiny." Just because YOU see she's tiny doesn't mean that SHE sees it.
  • RoseDarrett
    RoseDarrett Posts: 355 Member
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    We all have issues. You should not put stock in what randoms in a van shouting whatever it is they're shouting cos they have nothing better do with their time.


    You should never give people like that power. Regardless of what is being said.

    We've all been hurt,by people we know,strangers and family members.

    The best thing you can do is be "selectively deaf"
    If everything gets to you,you're going to end up miserable.
    Listen to the cheerleaders,not the haters ;)
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
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    I don't have empathy for this. You think I haven't been called things over the years? I don't let it bother me. If I did I would be a jibbering wreck! And I don't have time for that.

    Also, the OP just sent me hate mail! I find this amusing.

    did she mention bacon?
  • AntWrig
    AntWrig Posts: 2,273 Member
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    I have been called much worse, from guys in white vans... Crying? Really?
  • RebekahR84
    RebekahR84 Posts: 794 Member
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    I don't have empathy for this. You think I haven't been called things over the years? I don't let it bother me. If I did I would be a jibbering wreck! And I don't have time for that.

    Also, the OP just sent me hate mail! I find this amusing.

    I'll leave my hate mail on this board: you're kind of a jerk, aren't you? Everyone on this site has a similar goal: health. Why be so rude and unsupportive? If you don't like the topic of the thread, move on to the next one. Just because YOU'VE been called things over the years, it shouldn't bother the OP? Because we're all the same or something? I'm sure there are things that get to you that wouldn't get to her. So stop being a trolll.
  • BryKate
    BryKate Posts: 74 Member
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    I don't have empathy for this. You think I haven't been called things over the years? I don't let it bother me. If I did I would be a jibbering wreck! And I don't have time for that.

    Also, the OP just sent me hate mail! I find this amusing.


    Seriously? You're accusing me of sending you "hate " mail? I sent you a very calm email asking you not to be so critical as you don't know anything about my history with self esteem and eating issues. You have confidence and don't let what people say bother you? That's amazing. D you have any idea how jealous I am of that? I'd love t wake up every morning and feel ok about myself but I don't so please don't make out like its something I can just change or control.
  • sweetchildomine
    sweetchildomine Posts: 872 Member
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    I don't have empathy for this. You think I haven't been called things over the years? I don't let it bother me. If I did I would be a jibbering wreck! And I don't have time for that.

    Also, the OP just sent me hate mail! I find this amusing.

    I'll leave my hate mail on this board: you're kind of a jerk, aren't you? Everyone on this site has a similar goal: health. Why be so rude and unsupportive? If you don't like the topic of the thread, move on to the next one. Just because YOU'VE been called things over the years, it shouldn't bother the OP? Because we're all the same or something? I'm sure there are things that get to you that wouldn't get to her. So stop being a trolll.

    Blaine-This.gif
  • cherryd69
    cherryd69 Posts: 340
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    you heard two guys shout 'how's the bacon' from a moving van and now you're crying?

    Gosh. I think you ought to get your ears syringed. I strongly suggest they did not shout 'how's the bacon'

    I'm afraid I'm not going to write 'oh you're so beautiful' it can't be true', because I think that's ultimately what this about.

    Who's gives a *kitten* what two random guys in a van shouted? If a woman on a bus shouts about mushrooms, God help you.....

    This^^


    Sorry, but your NOT fat, 134 is not fat! 6lbs below my ideal weight... so again NOT FAT

    So why would anyone shout fat degrading comments at someone who would appear to 'everyday folk' as normal/skinny?


    As for crying about it... REALLY? You cant even be sure what they were reffering to and its upset you?
  • mazdauk
    mazdauk Posts: 1,380 Member
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    maybe they suggest you eat more bacon, 135 lbs is nothing....

    THIS

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