Respect on the boards

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I am going to make people mad yep I sure am!
95% of the people on this board are rational intellegent caring people on here to help people. But there is that other 5% that has nothing better than to attack and nit pick anybody for a success, failure, question or problem. We need to be here to support each other, not to attack people. for the last hour I have been watching a breastfeeding mom get torn apart because she lumped her daily breastfeeding in to 1, 9 minute session.
I got attacked yesterday for not making my stepson 20 year old a cake at 9 pm because I already knew I would eat it. I was proud of my husband for sticking up for me and so many people tried to make me feel selfish. I didn't figure I needed to explain humor or the fact that I stock my house with other goodies for him to eat.
People stop for a minute and remember that there is another human being on the end of the computer that is getting the message that they are somehow less of a person. Because they asked for help or didn't even think to add in every bit of information that they didn't realize was going to get picked apart. How does picking someone apart help that person? How does it help the other people who are reading the nasty posts? Just because you are hiding behind a computer screen doesn't give you the right to bully someone online. Yep if you do this you are a bully!
Remember the golden rule if you don't have something nice to say don't say anything at all.
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Replies

  • flitabout
    flitabout Posts: 200 Member
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    I have been told I look very young but I am a 36 year old mother of 4 bio kids and 2 wonderful stepsons that are 20 and just turned 22 today!
  • hzliiz
    hzliiz Posts: 166 Member
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    Why is it awkward to have a 20 y.o. stepson? Stepchildren aren't immune to becoming adults . And OP -- amen sister!
  • Alisha28
    Alisha28 Posts: 406 Member
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    So right on. This sight has some mean people. We are suppose to encourage and in the post your talking about I could not believe it so crazy! If you have nothing to say do not say it at all PEOPLE!:angry:
  • norahwynn
    norahwynn Posts: 862 Member
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    well said! :flowerforyou:
  • micheleb15
    micheleb15 Posts: 1,418 Member
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    This happens everyday. Your post yesterday did not tell the whole story upfront and what you wrote came off kind of petty. Unfortunately, this is what happens when you post on the internet. Some people are nice, some helpful, some sarcastic, some *****y, etc. People have opinions that will differ from yours.

    ETA - damn censors, it rhymes with witchy
  • skullshank
    skullshank Posts: 4,324 Member
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    You have a 20 year old stepson? :huh:

    That must be awkward.

    takei-lol.gif
  • I_Will_End_You
    I_Will_End_You Posts: 4,397 Member
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    Ahhh this thread should help the last 30 minutes at the office fly by.

    grinning.gif
  • jwdieter
    jwdieter Posts: 2,582 Member
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    I am going to make people mad yep I sure am!


    blah blah blah


    Remember the golden rule if you don't have something nice to say don't say anything at all.
  • skullshank
    skullshank Posts: 4,324 Member
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    I am going to make people mad yep I sure am!

    tumblr_mmy4znDjiR1rlgoxko1_400.gif
  • Alex_is_Hawks
    Alex_is_Hawks Posts: 3,499 Member
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    You have a 20 year old stepson? :huh:

    That must be awkward.

    takei-lol.gif

    jeez I wish I could hear this...

    I've heard his voice is positively orgasmic....

    :sadpanda:
  • farway
    farway Posts: 1,264 Member
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    I agree some are only here to nit pick & criticise

    But how on earth would anyone think making a cake at 9pm for a 20 year old, regardless of relationship, was a reasonable request?
  • TheBitSlinger
    TheBitSlinger Posts: 621 Member
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    People stop for a minute and remember that there is another human being on the end of the computer that is getting the message that they are somehow less of a person.

    Well said, but there in one sentence you just defined why this kind of behavior on the Internet will always be a problem; it's all bodiless communications, and as long as people don't have to be worried about getting murdered for being total *kitten* clowns, they will be as vicious as they can.
  • BrainyBurro
    BrainyBurro Posts: 6,129 Member
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    I am going to make people mad yep I sure am!
    95% of the people on this board are rational intellegent caring people on here to help people. But there is that other 5% that has nothing better than to attack and nit pick anybody for a success, failure, question or problem. We need to be here to support each other, not to attack people. for the last hour I have been watching a breastfeeding mom get torn apart because she lumped her daily breastfeeding in to 1, 9 minute session.
    I got attacked yesterday for not making my stepson 20 year old a cake at 9 pm because I already knew I would eat it. I was proud of my husband for sticking up for me and so many people tried to make me feel selfish. I didn't figure I needed to explain humor or the fact that I stock my house with other goodies for him to eat.
    People stop for a minute and remember that there is another human being on the end of the computer that is getting the message that they are somehow less of a person. Because they asked for help or didn't even think to add in every bit of information that they didn't realize was going to get picked apart. How does picking someone apart help that person? How does it help the other people who are reading the nasty posts? Just because you are hiding behind a computer screen doesn't give you the right to bully someone online. Yep if you do this you are a bully!
    Remember the golden rule if you don't have something nice to say don't say anything at all.

    where are these threads?

    i suspect that the people being jerks on them are not the ones most are going to assume from reading your complaint.

    there are jerks on this site...

    ...but the term bully has been so misused and cavalierly thrown around, that it's almost become synonymous with a group of people who try very hard to battle the bad misinformation often posted in the public forums.
  • I_Will_End_You
    I_Will_End_You Posts: 4,397 Member
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    I am going to make people mad yep I sure am!

    tumblr_mmy4znDjiR1rlgoxko1_400.gif

    Just when I thought the afternoon couldn't get any better.......
  • LoosingMyLast15
    LoosingMyLast15 Posts: 1,457 Member
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    I am going to make people mad yep I sure am!
    95% of the people on this board are rational intellegent caring people on here to help people. But there is that other 5% that has nothing better than to attack and nit pick anybody for a success, failure, question or problem. We need to be here to support each other, not to attack people. for the last hour I have been watching a breastfeeding mom get torn apart because she lumped her daily breastfeeding in to 1, 9 minute session.
    I got attacked yesterday for not making my stepson 20 year old a cake at 9 pm because I already knew I would eat it. I was proud of my husband for sticking up for me and so many people tried to make me feel selfish. I didn't figure I needed to explain humor or the fact that I stock my house with other goodies for him to eat.
    People stop for a minute and remember that there is another human being on the end of the computer that is getting the message that they are somehow less of a person. Because they asked for help or didn't even think to add in every bit of information that they didn't realize was going to get picked apart. How does picking someone apart help that person? How does it help the other people who are reading the nasty posts? Just because you are hiding behind a computer screen doesn't give you the right to bully someone online. Yep if you do this you are a bully!
    Remember the golden rule if you don't have something nice to say don't say anything at all.

    i've been following that breastfeeding topic but chose not to respond. imo i feel that breastfeeding should not be used as "exercise" i commend the woman for breastfeeding but at the same time to me that would fall under the housecleaning category (if i did it fat and i didn't loose weight then it's not exercise). the woman should really be eating WAY more than what she is because she is breastfeeding.

    as for your other topic which i went through and read (some) i think it would have helped from the very beginning if you had pointed out your step son is 20 because when you read your post it is easily interpreted that your step son is a child - hence the rude comments. knowing that he's 20 i would have said hell no too. :)

    as for rude people on here - some that have been on here for a long long time get tired of the same ole topics and well react instead of thinking through their response (and remembering the person asking is most likely new). at the same time it's very discouraging to read all the i only eat 500 calories and i'm full comments, lets all sing and hold hands. i don't know any grown adult that can survive long term on that little amount of food.

    lastly just like this post some get soooooooooo long winded most don't bother reading everything, not right but they do. take the posts for what they are worth - some gold others dodo. :)
  • jwdieter
    jwdieter Posts: 2,582 Member
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    I agree some are only here to nit pick & criticise

    But how on earth would anyone think making a cake at 9pm for a 20 year old, regardless of relationship, was a reasonable request?

    Check out the thread. Some people were just confused. Some people didn't know he was 20, and thought she was choosing not to make him a cake for his birthday (!).

    The vast majority of responses were supportive, but still we get this drama-seeking thread.
  • Ramberta
    Ramberta Posts: 1,312 Member
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    Your words are falling on deaf ears, honey.

    Because the people who always have a snarky response to everything aren't going to change their behavior one bit simply because someone is offended by it. In fact, that usually gives them a gleeful sort of satisfaction, because then they get to say "you're being oversensitive" and "it's the internet" and "you should expect this when you post on a forum". They also will have other people to back them up on why what they said isn't actually offensive at all, you simply just read it that way, they were "just stating facts", etc etc etc

    It's not worth the effort to try and change people who are never going to change. Worry about yourself and your family, teach them to be good people, and if you are genuinely getting upset at the 'tude around here then stay off the forums.

    That's about it, really.
  • HacheraTsarine
    HacheraTsarine Posts: 278 Member
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    If you know that 95% of MFP people are respectful and eager to help, why do you dignify the rude 5% with a rant?
    This is the Internet. There are trolls and ill-advised people everywhere you can land your eyes on. 5% is a pretty low number, based on my experience....
  • SoViLicious
    SoViLicious Posts: 2,633 Member
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    You have a 20 year old stepson? :huh:

    That must be awkward.


    Bwahahaha
  • sexymuffintop
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    Who cares about internet strangers and what they say or do? It affects you in no way in real life. I would say if you don't like getting opinions from lots of different people with differing views to yours don't post on internet forums. It's the road to madness.
This discussion has been closed.