children's diet and the obesity crisis

My mom tried that restrictive stuff when I was a kid, but fortunately there was a kid a few trailers down who got whatever he wanted. He was the connection for every kid in the trailer park. I can't tell you how many He-man figures, Hot Wheels, and chores I traded for Snickers bars, and potato chips. If they don't get it at home, they'll just find it out on the streets. *nods* true story

Dandelyon, kudos to you! If you explain to the adults in "your circle" about mindless snacking and the negative effects it has on your child, they should be careful what they give as snacks, if they don't.......maybe it's time to find a new circle. Thanks for your post.

Yep. Limiting your children's experiences is so the way to go [/sarcasm] And by limiting, I don't mean by food, but how they deal with people who live differently from them. this sounds like one way to teach a kid intolerance by saying they can't hang out with certain kids because they don't eat the way they do.

And hey, friendships are fleeting right? any excuse to get rid of those that will not follow your way, eh?

Meh. I teach my kids that junk food isn't everyday food and that too much makes you fat and sick. We even point out the examples of that in our friends and family. They feel bad for the people who don't have good food to eat or don't know any better and that's exactly the way I want it.

I'm just wondering if you know how snobby, elitist, and arrogant that sounded. Not saying you meant to be, but this is one example of why "clean eaters" and those that eat processed foods now and again get into constant arguments here.

Also, my parents taught me not to judge people by things like appearances, clothes, etc. Don't most parents want their kids to grow up not so judgmental and prejudice against others? Why would you point out people like that? to show them how they shouldn't want to be even if that person is a very good hearted person and to place more value on food snobbery and appearances over personality?

Oh boy, these "and this is why I'm better than everyone" posts really don't go over well around here. OP glad your child is a good eater with a good temperament. Attributing her laid back personality to your militant views on food might be a stretch. I guarantee you she won't be happy and laidback when all the other kids in her group are enjoying treats and the teacher or other parent tells her she can't have any.

I'll agree with you that childhood obesity is a problem and the onus is on the parents to teach and enforce good eating habits. But you can do so without denying all treats and judging every other parent that comes across your path.

I don't feel like reading through the other three pages, but I'll just bump this response because I agree with everything in it.

Meh. I teach my kids that junk food isn't everyday food and that too much makes you fat and sick. We even point out the examples of that in our friends and family. They feel bad for the people who don't have good food to eat or don't know any better and that's exactly the way I want it.

I'm sure that you didn't mean for this to come off as arrogant and judgemental as it did, and have taught your kids to have respect, love, and compassion for your friends and family rather than pity, which is a far more important lesson than eating habits.

No, I meant pity. I happen to think being fat and sick is a terrible way to live and with junk food normalized and available constantly it's my job to teach them how to eat responsibly.

Definition of PITY
1
a : sympathetic sorrow for one suffering, distressed, or unhappy
b : capacity to feel pity
2
: something to be regretted

Meh. I teach my kids that junk food isn't everyday food and that too much makes you fat and sick. We even point out the examples of that in our friends and family. They feel bad for the people who don't have good food to eat or don't know any better and that's exactly the way I want it.

I'm sure that you didn't mean for this to come off as arrogant and judgemental as it did, and have taught your kids to have respect, love, and compassion for your friends and family rather than pity, which is a far more important lesson than eating habits.

No, I meant pity. I happen to think being fat and sick is a terrible way to live and with junk food normalized and available constantly it's my job to teach them how to eat responsibly.

Definition of PITY
1
a : sympathetic sorrow for one suffering, distressed, or unhappy
b : capacity to feel pity
2
: something to be regretted

I pity your children then.

Meh. I teach my kids that junk food isn't everyday food and that too much makes you fat and sick. We even point out the examples of that in our friends and family. They feel bad for the people who don't have good food to eat or don't know any better and that's exactly the way I want it.

I'm sure that you didn't mean for this to come off as arrogant and judgemental as it did, and have taught your kids to have respect, love, and compassion for your friends and family rather than pity, which is a far more important lesson than eating habits.


OP: sometimes we have to make choices as parents. Because those parents make different choices than you do doesn't make them worse parents. It's easy to judge when you only have one child, and that child is compliant. Your choice is whether it's more important for you child to be able to build the skills to have positive social relationships (aka: play dates) with a variety of people, while indulging in treats with them or to make food intake the more important value.

Completely agree. Food is a part of life. Food in every form is a part of life. It's better to teach your child to enjoy in moderation and have a healthy relationship with it. Creating the belief that there is "good" and "bad" at a young age is not always so wise.

Sesame Street teaches it best to 5 year olds, I think. And maybe a few adults.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iH9IO6iMO78

Dandelyon, kudos to you! If you explain to the adults in "your circle" about mindless snacking and the negative effects it has on your child, they should be careful what they give as snacks, if they don't.......maybe it's time to find a new circle. Thanks for your post.

Yep. Limiting your children's experiences is so the way to go [/sarcasm] And by limiting, I don't mean by food, but how they deal with people who live differently from them. this sounds like one way to teach a kid intolerance by saying they can't hang out with certain kids because they don't eat the way they do.

And hey, friendships are fleeting right? any excuse to get rid of those that will not follow your way, eh?

Meh. I teach my kids that junk food isn't everyday food and that too much makes you fat and sick. We even point out the examples of that in our friends and family. They feel bad for the people who don't have good food to eat or don't know any better and that's exactly the way I want it.

I'm just wondering if you know how snobby, elitist, and arrogant that sounded. Not saying you meant to be, but this is one example of why "clean eaters" and those that eat processed foods now and again get into constant arguments here.

Also, my parents taught me not to judge people by things like appearances, clothes, etc. Don't most parents want their kids to grow up not so judgmental and prejudice against others? Why would you point out people like that? to show them how they shouldn't want to be even if that person is a very good hearted person and to place more value on food snobbery and appearances over personality?

I'm not a clean eater and my family eats pizza and ice cream and candy. Just not everyday or even every week. It's an occasional indulgence and they know exactly why it's an occasional indulgence because I show them what happens if they eat that stuff everyday.

My children can be good hearted and compassionate without suffering themselves and I honestly can't even imagine why I would ever tell my kids their health doesn't matter as long as they have a good personality. That's absurd!

Solution to OPs problem:

Find self sufficient farm without a single neighbor anywhere within 20 miles. Grow/raise all your own food and never interact with anyone who dares to eat anything outside of your very narrow definition of what constitutes food.

In this solution, we all win.

teaching kids the benefits of healthy eating, regular exercise and that treats are ok once in a while might be a way to solve the obesity crisis.

Not to mention type 2 diabetes, kidney disease, heart disease, back, hip, knee, joint problems, narcotic dependence etc etc.
You can all argue with me and tell me how wrong I am and how I have no idea what I'm talking about, but I see it every day at work.
I've been a nurse for over 25 years and when I first started, I saw the above diseases in MUCH older people.
There were no bariatric beds or wheelchairs.
Yes, there were some people who were overweight and obese but nothing like now.
30 year old non-compliant diabetic in full blown kidney failure, on dialysis, both legs amputated below the knee, not expected to see his 31st birthday.
Men and women in their 30s and 40s who are 400, 500, 600 pounds.
Can barely wheel themselves into the dining room to eat a restricted calorie meal only to have family and friends bringing in all kinds of junk/fast food.
Their joints in so much pain that their days literally revolve around the next dose of Oxycodone.
Surgical wounds that can't heal properly and dehisce, leaving them in the nursing home for months to get IV antibiotics and dressing changes in hopes of healing so they can go home.
They can't work. They can't raise their kids.
And all of it could have been prevented.
With a healthy diet and regular exercise.
Is it really too far of a reach to want to start our kids down a healthy path?

Solution to OPs problem:

Find self sufficient farm without a single neighbor anywhere within 20 miles. Grow/raise all your own food and never interact with anyone who dares to eat anything outside of your very narrow definition of what constitutes food.

In this solution, we all win.

Well, they have online schooling now so she could opt to do that and not have to worry about these things until they decide to live on their own...with online college courses, that could easily extend to 22.

It puts the right food in its skin or it gets the hose..

-giggles-

I'm not sure how many of these people offering alternatives are being serious.

From my perspective the best thing to do is just pay attention. If your daughter is offered unhealthy foods by a friend or friends family, it's not reasonable for the OP to have to tell the other child's parents what foods are acceptable for her child. That would just make everyone upset.

The best thing to do is just talk to your daughter, keep vigilant, and make sure that once another child is identified as a "junk food pusher", that child is eliminated from your daughter's life.

The ideal state will be that your child only associates with other children who eat a specific diet. Anything else is going to make her corrupted on the inside.

We've taught my son that when you are at someone else's house you follow their rules. He does not have to finish all of what's on his plate at our house, although I will make him finish the vegetables or make him keep eating if it's obvious that he is just desperate to go and play instead. At my cousin's he has to finish it all. This was causing a problem because he didn't want to finish and would get upset. Finally we worked out why: on the way home they had two 'snack stops', then when they got home they had a 'snack bowl', so, even though these snacks were mainly healthy, he wasn't actually hungry for his main meal. Having worked this out, with him present, he chose to start turning down some snacks so that he would be hungry enough for his main meal. Returning control of his appetite to him ended the fighting. He's 5, and as you can see above, his own kind of awkward (:laugh:), but through this experience he is learning useful skills of adaptation and negotiation.

We are probably just lucky he has a strong dislike for being over-full. I'm not going to assume it's my parenting that sets him apart, and who knows what his little brother will be like. In different conversations, both his best friend and his cousin have told me their favourite thing is food, while he asked me once 'People don't like eating, do they?' because even though there is food he likes, he would much rather be playing or reading.

I'm not sure I can say anything to help you, OP, but if your daughter has already internalised your beliefs on food, maybe she can learn to say 'No thank you' all by herself.

Meh. I teach my kids that junk food isn't everyday food and that too much makes you fat and sick. We even point out the examples of that in our friends and family. They feel bad for the people who don't have good food to eat or don't know any better and that's exactly the way I want it.

I'm sure that you didn't mean for this to come off as arrogant and judgemental as it did, and have taught your kids to have respect, love, and compassion for your friends and family rather than pity, which is a far more important lesson than eating habits.

No, I meant pity. I happen to think being fat and sick is a terrible way to live and with junk food normalized and available constantly it's my job to teach them how to eat responsibly.

Definition of PITY
1
a : sympathetic sorrow for one suffering, distressed, or unhappy
b : capacity to feel pity
2
: something to be regretted

I pity your children then.

Why is that? Because the parents care about their kids health and development?

That forum amuses me. So many people here trying to lose 100-200 pounds because they gained weight due to unhealthy habits developed from the childhood. Yet they judge parents for teaching kids to be healthy and smart about food choices.

Unfortunately in America parents have the obligation to teach their kids about food choices because it seems like most of the society can give a crap about this.

And it's not just about calories, it's about kids growing healthy! They can't be healthy if they eat pizza and donuts!

I agree with the OP. How can an adult have healthy food habits if they were raised on heaps of processed foods. I don't know, could be that I'm from Europe, but the notion of so many posters here implying that processed foods are part of growing up and a normal part of a child's diet really surprises me. I mean, I was not raised on fast food, don't like Macs and similar, yeah, have love for pizzas and pasta, they are culturally part of the environment where I come from, and I can only say I am grateful for my parents on how they took care of my diet since I must say, resetting my eating habits back to what is healthy for me isn't a process of denying myself. Feels more like eating foods I was raised on, so it's pretty much comfy and yummy.

Edit to add: No, I don't have children. So I took the post from an adult's perspective and not from the parenting point of view.

Yup, I agree it's very much cultural differences.

I must say that I gained weight when I first moved to America and developed new eating habits.

As a parent my eating habits changed after I had kids. I grew up eating home cooked meals but they were all southern foods. Momma fried EVERYTHING! I tried to give healthier choices. It was only after I started trying to loose weight did I drasticly change. I do not believe that processed foods are a part of anyone's "normal childhood"....I didn't have it and I was normal. Now you may not think eating everything fried is normal but to me it was. However, the junk food is sadly here to stay. It is our jobs as parents to teach our children how to eat healthy. No poster on a website will change my mind about how I feed my children, just as I do not plan on changing anyone elses mind on feeding theirs. If parents would just teach children how to pick the healthy choices instead of shamming, forceing, scareing, or pitiing food choices then our children will become healthy eaters.

If a child is not allowed to try what thier friends are having with mom around....they will binge on it when she isn't around. Everyting in moderation is the only way I could live my life and stay healthy and that is exactly what I'm teaching my kids.

I agree with many of the posters on here. My daughter is 10 and a few years back she started getting a bit pudgy ("coincidentally" it coincided with me packing on the pounds too. Needless to say, it is my job as her parent to teach her healthy eating habits, and that is what I've done. She is no longer pudgy and eats what the grownups eat. She tries everything I put in front of her (even if it's chickpeas and lentils) without fuss. For the most part she no longer eats processed food (well it's limited anyway), at least at home. However I do make exceptions when she has a friend over (I will buy them some ice cream for dessert etc) and I also don't forbid her to eat certain foods when she is out with friends. She has on occasion gorged on junk food at friend's parties, but has paid the price for it by being sick for the entire next day. She is learning that although those foods taste good, they can (if eaten to excess) make you feel pretty sick. Children are going to be exposed to unhealthy foods whether you like it or not, so instead of forbidding it, it's better to give them to tools to make the right choices for themselves, and maybe sometimes that means they will choose the junk, you just have to hope that they will make the healthy choices the majority of the time.

Also, I think telling other parents not to give her certain foods will only offend them and ostracize your daughter, best to just keep it to yourself and make sure she eats a bit healthier when she is around you.

But would it be possible to ask the other parents to include some healthy food? So the kids have options, and instead soda or pizza they would have fresh juices, mineral water and chicken or fish? And also add fruits instead of cakes and candies.