What is your key to a long successful marriage ?

donyellemoniquex3
donyellemoniquex3 Posts: 2,384 Member
in Chit-Chat
My parents have been married for 24 years. They say humor =}
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Replies

  • benol1
    benol1 Posts: 867 Member
    Love and respect in equal measure.
    And knowing when to keep one's mouth shut.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,029 Member
    For the man- conforming

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • xapril77x
    xapril77x Posts: 248 Member
    ^^^ truth
  • Skeletor666
    Skeletor666 Posts: 41 Member
    Never getting married.
    Marriage is the transfer of wealth from men to women.

    http://www.lifesitenews.com/news/young-men-giving-up-on-marriage-women-arent-women-anymore/
  • aquarabbit
    aquarabbit Posts: 1,622 Member
    Only been with my guy 5 years (married for 2 as of the 10th), but we're friends with a lot of other couples (some are still together and some aren't) and I would say humor, not trying to change the other person, making time to do things together (even just sitting and talking), and accepting that sometimes, you'll annoy each other and that it's better to be prepared for it rather than think everyday is going to be a fairy tale. And that the relationship changes and evolves just like everything else in a person's life.
  • SueGeer
    SueGeer Posts: 1,169 Member
    Me being always right.......and him knowing it! :laugh: Done 29 years in September :heart: :heart: :heart:
  • Nicolee_2014
    Nicolee_2014 Posts: 1,572 Member
    I'm not married YET. I've been with my partner for 8 years & I hope we are together for the rest of our lives. I think being individual people is part of the success.

    I cannot stand couples who cannot do ANYTHING without their partners. My brother & his gf are like conjoined twins & they wonder why they fight constantly.
  • ssm_1972
    ssm_1972 Posts: 396 Member
    Even Google is searching the key..............
  • sam308lbs
    sam308lbs Posts: 1,936 Member
    "If you have someone to clean your house and do your shopping, and you get some action on a regular basis, the only reason you need a wife is if you have some sick compulsion to give away half your stuff"
  • jdad1
    jdad1 Posts: 1,899 Member
    The key to a good long marriage is learning, and remembering, that life is not all about you. All to often a spouse continues to live as they are the only thing that matters.
  • xapril77x
    xapril77x Posts: 248 Member
    Me being always right.......and him knowing it! :laugh: Done 29 years in September :heart: :heart: :heart:

    same here! been together 10 yrs, married 8... Congrats on 29 yrs!
  • Dunkirk
    Dunkirk Posts: 465 Member
    Our 30th wedding anniversary in October. My keys are: marrying the right person, having fun together, knowing when to zip the lip - even when I don't want to, mutual honour and respect, choosing the appropriate time to talk about issues - even if it means waiting days, choosing not to take offense or be hurt when something said or done unintentionally, have more than 3 children - you are out numbered and have to get along.
  • ssm_1972
    ssm_1972 Posts: 396 Member
    First of all, what is "successful marriage" ? How you define ??
  • SRHelicity
    SRHelicity Posts: 36
    I cannot stand couples who cannot do ANYTHING without their partners. My brother & his gf are like conjoined twins & they wonder why they fight constantly.

    I think every couple is different. I've had people tell me the same thing (i.e. "ugh, why do you always hang out together like you're attached at the hip?!), and I've known many couples who didn't want to spend much time together split up. I'm not sure there's much association, but I only have a handful of anecdotes for that assessment.

    My wife and I started dating in high school 13 years ago; we dated for 6 years and thus have been married for the past 7 years. We've been an "attached at the hip" couple in that we almost always do everything together. Why? Because she's my best friend, and I love doing things together with her. It works for us. *shrug*

    Respect each other. Respect that neither of you is perfect and learn to live with those imperfections. Pull your fair share of weight around the house (house chores, child duties, etc.).
  • rikwaynik
    rikwaynik Posts: 724 Member
    We will have 32 years later this month. We've never had his and her chores. We both do what needs to be done. We both like our space and that works for us. Be willing to say when you're wrong and be willing to compromise sometimes, even when you "know" you're right. :) Lastly, you have to have the attitude that this is a lifetime commitment. So when things go bad (and they will), you will put forth more effort to get past those times. You won't have to worry about anyone getting anyone else's money in a divorce settlement, only when death do you part.
  • GlitterrMagpie
    GlitterrMagpie Posts: 302 Member
    Don't sweat the small stuff.
  • LaserMum
    LaserMum Posts: 133
    When I was single I would always say "Marriage is an institution and I'm not quite mad enough to be institutionalized." :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    I wish I'd listened to my own advice. I've now been married 25 years. I didn't even get a card or present on our silver wedding anniversary. Only good thing is my wonderful daughter.

    My advice to anyone thinking of getting married? DON'T DO IT!!!
  • leilaphoenix
    leilaphoenix Posts: 839 Member
    I notice nobody has mentioned good sex...
  • mspoopoo
    mspoopoo Posts: 500 Member
    marrying the right person, not just the arm candy or best sex partner.
    mutual respect
    willing to work as a team
    having things in common
    actually liking each other
    similar values
  • fitmom07
    fitmom07 Posts: 215 Member
    I've been with my husband for over 8 years and been married 6 years. I have to say the thing that has made us last is being open and honest with each other. We always work things out. My parents have been married about 37 years and I've lost count of my grandparent's, I think maybe 62 years?! They are my inspiration.
  • benjib84
    benjib84 Posts: 125
    1) Have the right person
    2) Listen
    3) Love
  • DawnieB1977
    DawnieB1977 Posts: 4,248 Member
    My parents have been married 39 years this October! They joke that they've been together so long because of shift work! At one point both were doing shifts, mainly opposite ones, so didn't see a lot of each other! In truth, they respect and love each other, but they also have independence and their own hobbies.

    I've been with my husband for 10 years, married for 5 of those. He does shift work, so maybe that helps lol. I think we just balance each other out.
  • Kymmu
    Kymmu Posts: 1,650 Member
    21 years next month for us.
    Make time for each other.
    Respect each other.
    Learn when to bite your tongue!
  • tekwriter
    tekwriter Posts: 923 Member
    Will be celebrating our 29th in September although we were together for a year and a half before that. I would say communication and commitment. You never expect your mate to change when you marry them. If that would be the case you shouldn't marry them. Marriage is not a temporary thing. It is permanent you need to work together to make it work.
  • IronPhyllida
    IronPhyllida Posts: 533 Member
    My parents have been married for 24 years. They say humor =}
    My parents have been married for over 50 yrs. He wore a uniform when they married and she was a brilliant cook. So he got a better deal as he retired from the army a few years back.
    But I think patience plays a lot in a marriage.
    Hence I'm single :laugh:
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    talking about your problems and issues like mature adults. everyone has issues and problems in their marriage, anyone who says otherwise is kidding themselves or outright lying. nearly everyone has a screaming match every now and then too, the trick is to know that you should stop yelling and start talking like adults, and actually do that.

    that's when love, mutual respect, and genuine concern for each other comes in, because you'll want to resolve the issue in a way that's acceptable for both of you, as opposed to one of you always getting their own way and imposing their will on the other.

    and the rest of the time you need to be able to have fun together and enjoy each others' company. And there needs to be some degree of compatibility in terms of hobbies, opinions, etc, but not be completely identical because otherwise conversation will get boring as you just tell each other the same things and agree with each other all the time.

    ETA: and you should find each other sexually desirable too, and have fun in the bedroom*. That's important too....

    ETA#2: **or the kitchen, the living room, or anywhere....
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    Treat your spouse as you would want to be treated. Always show affection and take pride in yourself, your relationship and your partner. Selfishness doesn't belong in a marriage. :smooched:
  • ttippie2000
    ttippie2000 Posts: 412 Member
    I have a friend who just celebrated his 50th wedding anniversary. When I asked him what was his secret, he looked down for a moment, paused and said, "Neither one of us hears very well."
  • symonspatrick
    symonspatrick Posts: 213 Member
    I have only been married for 34 years. I am still trying to figure out the key to a long successful marriage.
  • fitmom07
    fitmom07 Posts: 215 Member
    Never getting married.
    Marriage is the transfer of wealth from men to women.

    http://www.lifesitenews.com/news/young-men-giving-up-on-marriage-women-arent-women-anymore/

    I will have to disagree on this one. The first 2 years of my husband's and my marriage, I worked full time and supported him while he went to school! Now he supports me so I can take care of the kids.

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