Getting Called Out In Public - "You Are Fat"

trackmyday1973
trackmyday1973 Posts: 393 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
Any advice on how to overcome this public humiliation?

Thanks
«1345

Replies

  • zenalasca
    zenalasca Posts: 563 Member
    People can be nasty to everyone. I've been called "slut" in public by people who nothing about me, while I was walking to uni in my stockings, dress and coat jacket. And not even based on my clothing (I don't dress like a slut! TT)
  • TamaraKat
    TamaraKat Posts: 533 Member
    This may sounds harsh - and I apologise, I don't mean this the wrong way - but you will have to grow thick skin and ignore, its one of the only ways around it :( It's not worth making a fuss over it in public because people will see that it affects you deeply and will continue to do it because they gain satisfaction. You will also draw attention to yourself.
    I've been in the same position, it's not nice...
  • trackmyday1973
    trackmyday1973 Posts: 393 Member
    People can be nasty to everyone. I've been called "slut" in public by people who nothing about me, while I was walking to uni in my stockings, dress and coat jacket. And not even based on my clothing (I don't dress like a slut! TT)

    I am sorry that happened to you. I am sorry you had to go through that.

    The only difference is.... being a slut or not a slut is not something that can be proven by what one wears.

    I know being called a slut is very hurtful. I am sorry you had to go through this.

    Whereas being overweight is plain to see.

    Sorry if this comes out wrong.
  • Samstan101
    Samstan101 Posts: 699 Member
    Surely the response is "And you are rude. I'm losing weight, what are you doing to improve yourself?"
  • trackmyday1973
    trackmyday1973 Posts: 393 Member
    What bothered me even more was the fact that she said "I hate all you fat people"

    OMG she just offended so many people all at once without knowing us.... based just on weight she "hates" us.

    Society has come to this?
  • hoffmann_maddy
    hoffmann_maddy Posts: 16 Member
    Don't be discouraged. If someone thinks someone is fat, they're gonna think it. If they think someone is ugly or stupid or whatever, they're gonna think it. The really obnoxious and rude people will say it out loud. But that only makes them look bad, not you. People will think what they want and say what they want, but that is what makes them who they are. I know it doesn't do anything to ease the sting of the pain, but just remember what your working towards and remember that you will look better than that person and then they will have to shut their mouths and eat their words. I am always a fan for the underdog :)
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    Society has come to this?

    Yes... ignore it, move on....
  • 0somuchbetter0
    0somuchbetter0 Posts: 1,335 Member
    Someone who says something like that is truly unhappy and has some serious problems. Feel sorry for her and then forget about it and move on.
  • Sugarbeat
    Sugarbeat Posts: 824 Member
    What bothered me even more was the fact that she said "I hate all you fat people"

    OMG she just offended so many people all at once without knowing us.... based just on weight she "hates" us.

    Society has come to this?

    Its like I tell my girls (13 yrs) people say things like this to make themselves feel better. Only it doesn't work, they feel worse but they can't understand why so they keep doing it. I tell them to try and pity the person, but also stand up for themselves. Not because their words will necessarily hurt the other person, but because it will make them (my girls) feel more empowered.
  • RaggedyPond
    RaggedyPond Posts: 1,487 Member
    I would fart in her general direction.
  • Th3stral
    Th3stral Posts: 93 Member
    I would pity them. If they have got so little going on in their own lives that they get their kicks out of shouting insults at strangers in the street then they are pretty pathetic!
  • 257_Lag
    257_Lag Posts: 1,249 Member
    I would say "Yup, but I used to be fatter. Did you used to be nicer?"

    But then again, I'm not easily offended. Roll with it.
  • fadedintomemory
    fadedintomemory Posts: 9 Member
    I know how devastating that can be... I was out hiking at a state park, feeling great the whole time because I was burning calories and having fun. Then at the end, on the way back to the car, these 2 teenage idiots start to make rude noises at me and laugh/snicker to each other. It really hurts, especially when you're trying to change. I just ended up crying after that, but then got over it because I am trying to change, they don't know anything about me, and they are sad, unhappy people. I've had things like this happen before many times, and I let it take me down. Not anymore though. NOT anymore.

    But to hear she said "I hate all you fat people" - now that is extreme. To use the word hate and then group us together like we're all one and the same... That's nuts. She must have mental health issues, for sure.

    Keep your head up, hun. Don't let haters take you down. I know easier said than done, but just keep reminding yourself of what you are doing and how far you've come.
  • jonsey_s
    jonsey_s Posts: 222
    Tough love......IGNORE THEM

    Chances are they are scared of being fat themselves.

    I am in a slightly different different position to you. A few months ago I got called fat by someone in a car driving past, but they got caught in traffic and I caught up with them at the traffic lights.

    *Tap tap* (look of sheer horror on drivers face)

    You think I'm fat?

    Errrr...no.no..I err....no...err...sorry, sorry.

    Then the light changed. :smile:


    The point is that it only hurts if you let it. You are on a health journey and will get there.
    :flowerforyou:
  • KatelynnFluffToFit
    KatelynnFluffToFit Posts: 3 Member
    I know that it sucks massively and I'm sorry that happened to you *sending you hugs through the internet ^-^* And yeah it sucks that some people are so close minded that they just assume everyone that isn't just like them is wrong, but ignoring it is one of the best things you can try to do.

    I'm not saying I like it, in fact I wouldn't mind if karma came up to people like that and kicked them in the face, but stubborn people won't see reason because they could care less.

    So just try and ignore those people, and focus on being a total badass :3 That's how I got through high school ^-^ It's kind of hard but eventually it becomes second nature to give no craps about judgmental people
  • trackmyday1973
    trackmyday1973 Posts: 393 Member
    I know how devastating that can be... I was out hiking at a state park, feeling great the whole time because I was burning calories and having fun. Then at the end, on the way back to the car, these 2 teenage idiots start to make rude noises at me and laugh/snicker to each other. It really hurts, especially when you're trying to change. I just ended up crying after that, but then got over it because I am trying to change, they don't know anything about me, and they are sad, unhappy people. I've had things like this happen before many times, and I let it take me down. Not anymore though. NOT anymore.

    But to hear she said "I hate all you fat people" - now that is extreme. To use the word hate and then group us together like we're all one and the same... That's nuts. She must have mental health issues, for sure.

    Keep your head up, hun. Don't let haters take you down. I know easier said than done, but just keep reminding yourself of what you are doing and how far you've come.

    Thanks. Yes, I felt the same...all happy I lost almost 15 lbs...and then I get a rude comment like that.

    I am over it now. It's just, as others have said, pathetic.

    Oh well, she's the fuel that will keep me going (not that I needed it cause I am focused and determined)
  • trackmyday1973
    trackmyday1973 Posts: 393 Member
    Tough love......IGNORE THEM

    Chances are they are scared of being fat themselves.

    I am in a slightly different different position to you. A few months ago I got called fat by someone in a car driving past, but they got caught in traffic and I caught up with them at the traffic lights.

    *Tap tap* (look of sheer horror on drivers face)

    You think I'm fat?

    Errrr...no.no..I err....no...err...sorry, sorry.

    Then the light changed. :smile:


    The point is that it only hurts if you let it. You are on a health journey and will get there.
    :flowerforyou:

    Thank you :)

    Good for you for putting them in an awkward position.

    Yay, sometimes traffic lights DO work in our favour :)
  • ACrowsDay
    ACrowsDay Posts: 64 Member
    I always believed when someone is putting you down they are trying to make themselves look better... In their case, I wouldn't want to be them! Hold your head up high, your right, your doing something about it! What do they know???
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
    What bothered me even more was the fact that she said "I hate all you fat people"

    OMG she just offended so many people all at once without knowing us.... based just on weight she "hates" us.

    Society has come to this?

    So, she hates all fat people... that's HER problem, not yours. What's there to overcome? She was a rude person. There's loads of rude people in the world, loads of people who hate others for stupid reasons. You can't change them, but you can change how you react to them. Don't give her words power.

    Honestly, the person who said this is the one who should feel humiliated.
  • AbstractAsterism
    AbstractAsterism Posts: 153 Member
    When I was in high school I went roller skating. Now since I wasn't a size 0 in HS, I was fat. Granted I was a rather healthy size 12, but yeah, I wasn't a stick. So I went roller skating one night, and a bunch of guys followed me and mooed. When I walked past, other kids would shout 'earthquake!' and shake. Gotta love kids, right? So here I am recovering still at 32 from a devastated self-esteem, wishing I was that incredibly healthy size 12! My husband has been trying so hard to break me out of my fear of public, and has come to my defense when other people snicker at me. He's also helping me lose weight, so there's that.

    When I was around 22, one of my coworkers said "well you're overweight, so you hate skinny people, right?" Don't know where THAT came from.

    Probably the one that pissed me off the most was from my now former doctor a few years ago. I hurt my knee in karate class then after a stair tumble. As soon as he walked into the office the FIRST thing out of his mouth was "Well, you're overweight, so this isn't going to be good." It got worse from there, and what makes me laugh about it is the guy easily topped 400 pounds!
  • TruckersWifeTruckersLife
    TruckersWifeTruckersLife Posts: 408 Member
    As hurtful as it was go by the saying we would all do when we were young children "sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me".
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    Well, think of it like this...

    Obviously, someone who behaves like this is NOT having a happy life...they must be really miserable on the inside. They deserve your pity more than anything.
  • p4ulmiller
    p4ulmiller Posts: 588 Member
    Any advice on how to overcome this public humiliation?

    I remember being called "Fatso" once when I was in the queue for a ride at Alton Towers, years ago.

    I turned to the woman said "Yeah, and you're ugly. I can lose weight pretty easily, but it'll take a fortune in plastic surgery to fix your face"

    My kids fell about the place, and the woman - red-faced - left the queue with everyone laughing at her.

    Karma is a *****!
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    I would fart in her general direction.

    ^^^^ THIS!!
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    Any advice on how to overcome this public humiliation?

    I remember being called "Fatso" once when I was in the queue for a ride at Alton Towers, years ago.

    I turned to the woman said "Yeah, and you're ugly. I can lose weight pretty easily, but it'll take a fortune in plastic surgery to fix your face"

    My kids fell about the place, and the woman - red-faced - left the queue with everyone laughing at her.

    Karma is a *****!

    ^^^^ or this!!! (not that we should really stoop to their level, but this did make me LOL)
  • HotMummyMission
    HotMummyMission Posts: 1,723 Member
    Use it as motivation an hope to god you see that person when you are sexyy and rub it alll up in there face :)
  • Cp731
    Cp731 Posts: 3,195 Member
    wink and nod
  • Fleming617
    Fleming617 Posts: 1
    I would fart in her general direction.

    Nice Monty Python nod... but I wouldn't even give the "lady" so much as a fart! hehe :huh:
  • ArroganceInStep
    ArroganceInStep Posts: 6,239 Member
    Someone who says something like that is truly unhappy and has some serious problems. Feel sorry for her and then forget about it and move on.

    lmao
  • DaveS_63
    DaveS_63 Posts: 50
    You cannot control how others act. You can, however control the way you react to them. you have two choices. you can choose to be offended and let it destroy any work you have done to become a better you.....OR you can use to gain strength and become even more dedicated to changing and improving your self.

    I was told"damn! you're getting fat!" I looked in the mirror and realized that person was right. I let myself get fat. I chose to do something about it and lose the weight. After losing it, the same person asked me if i was sick because i had lost so much weight.

    So I say"Thank you- you rude miserable piece of sh**! you got me to lose weight and become healthier!"

    The reality is there will always be people like that. They will get theirs(Karma). You are the one with the choice. How will you react?

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