Why do girls like jerks? Why do they put up with them?
Replies
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This door totally swings both ways. there is a girl in my office, who is the most snotty, conceited, self absorbed, *****y human being I've ever met. Her ex boyfriend sent her flowers yesterday, and her response? "I don't like these flowers. Ew these are so ugly." But yet EVERY guy in our office is obsessed with her.
because she's unattainable. lol
Exactly, she is also most likely hot as well.0 -
The better question is, why do guys go after the girls who want jerks when they know they themselves are not a jerk?
I mean...girls who go after this kind of guy are in it for 1.) the drama (which often ensues) and 2.) the danger.
If you have neither of those to offer, don't waste your time-go after a girl who wants the nice guy that will be there for her.
I have many friends who go after the jerks. I don't understand them and I'm not one of them. I bagged a nice guy and I'm holding onto him.
Hahaha! Really? You forgot sex. (which is before drama and danger) You are a 10/10 but now would not bang
A little confused about what you're trying to say...
Only bad boys know how to have sex? Only bad boys know how to have good sex?
Are you saying guys go after girls that want bad boys even though they themselves are not bad boys because they want sex?
So confused. Plus in my personal (and perhaps old-fashioned opinion) sex is better with someone that respects you. I understand what you are saying...but...this is how I feel.
Sorry. I guess I was being a jerk?
You asked "The better question is, why do guys go after the girls who want jerks when they know they themselves are not a jerk?"
When you ask why a guy goes after (actively pursues) a girl 99 times out of 100 its because he wants sex from her.
Being friends with someone, have a relationship with, and eventually falling in love with are completely different things. Thats not going after anything. Thats fate.0 -
Because even though they are jerks, they have qualities that probably display: Confidence, Decision Making, etc. It's still more appealing then a man who is more feminine then they are.0
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Tell me why?
Girls might like them but women don't0 -
We are just better at manipulating people.0
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Someone make me a sammich and get me a cold beer0
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Question is, why do guys only go after the tiny, blonde headed girls? Why do guys go for the girls that don't respect themselves?
What's wrong with me? I definitely don't like jerks but then again I don't even get looked at. When is the last time I was asked out on a date? About 7 years........ I am not skinny, but definitely not fat. I am not blonde by any means and I respect myself.
Answer me that!!!!
Perhaps you're unapproachable? I've been told many times I'm rather intimidating due to my introverted personality. I'm rather quite, typically don't start up conversations, usually have a poker face. The reality of the situation is I'm extremely nice, respectful, and receptive to people that i feel are worth my time.
Try to be a little more alert to how people perceive you.0 -
Well apparently... I don't attract nice guys in the first place.
Tell me this... why do nice guys only want girls that treat them like ****?!?!?0 -
The better question is, why do guys go after the girls who want jerks when they know they themselves are not a jerk?
I mean...girls who go after this kind of guy are in it for 1.) the drama (which often ensues) and 2.) the danger.
If you have neither of those to offer, don't waste your time-go after a girl who wants the nice guy that will be there for her.
I have many friends who go after the jerks. I don't understand them and I'm not one of them. I bagged a nice guy and I'm holding onto him.
Hahaha! Really? You forgot sex. (which is before drama and danger) You are a 10/10 but now would not bang
A little confused about what you're trying to say...
Only bad boys know how to have sex? Only bad boys know how to have good sex?
Are you saying guys go after girls that want bad boys even though they themselves are not bad boys because they want sex?
So confused. Plus in my personal (and perhaps old-fashioned opinion) sex is better with someone that respects you. I understand what you are saying...but...this is how I feel.
Sorry. I guess I was being a jerk?
You asked "The better question is, why do guys go after the girls who want jerks when they know they themselves are not a jerk?"
When you ask why a guy goes after (actively pursues) a girl 99 times out of 100 its because he wants sex from her.
Being friends with someone, have a relationship with, and eventually falling in love with are completely different things. Thats not going after anything. Thats fate.
I see what you're saying. And Yeah-that's true for a lot of guys.
You're not being a jerk, just didn't understand what you had said.
And agreed-there's a big difference between falling in love-and the sex you have with that person-and going after someone with that one purpose in mind.
I just wanted clarification. I know a lot of people see it differently. I guess this is a frustrating subject for me because a good friend of mine cries to me all the time about how her boyfriend treats her (he is one of the "bad boys"/jerks) and she's told me things he does...he's not a nice person. he's cheated on her, he's emotionally and perhaps even physically hurt her...but she doesn't leave. I can't understand girls like that. Especially when she deserves and could easily have so much better.0 -
I was the strange one in my group of friends who did not go for the bad boys, even in my teens. I always liked the dorky awkward ones. Like the one I married. He's not perfect by any stretch, but definitely not that arrogant type. I never really understood the appeal there. Even the sex aspect. I always found the shy ones so much sexier than the loud ones. I'd much rather date the dork than the badass. I like a thrill, but not in that way. I'll go skydiving or go out with my insane aunt instead.0
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If by jerk, we are talking about the strong, confident, arrogant bad boy kind of thing..... Then I believe it's an instinctual thing. In nature, the females are attracted to the Alpha wolves of the pack because of her survival instincts and the fact she wants her pups to have the strongest possible bloodlines. But, if we are talking about just plain jerks, well, then I'm as puzzled as you are.
I was just about to say this myself. They're all the traits we need for survival; strength, confidence (could be seen as arrogance). It's just science. Haha
I believe this too! I have no idea why I am attracted to idiots, I just am!
There's a HUGE difference between being attracted to a strong, confident man and being attracted to an idiot or a jerk. Don't confuse the two.
Most girls who are attracted to *kitten* have had terrible role models and have no clue what a good man is. They go with what they know.0 -
Person Type A is attracted to Person Types B and D.
Person Type C is attracted to Person Type D
Person Type D is attracted to Person Types A and D.
Person Type B is attracted to Person Type B
Nobody is attracted to Person Type C.
Don't be Person Type C. Be Person Type B or D. You can be Person Type A, but there's a 50/50 chance you won't be happy.
I hope that clears everything up for you.0 -
Person Type A is attracted to Person Types B and D.
Person Type C is attracted to Person Type D
Person Type D is attracted to Person Types A and D.
Person Type B is attracted to Person Type B
Nobody is attracted to Person Type C.
Don't be Person Type C. Be Person Type B or D. You can be Person Type A, but there's a 50/50 chance you won't be happy.
I hope that clears everything up for you.
Wait a minute....
This sounds too much like math....probability...cannot....handle...it!0 -
The better question is, why do guys go after the girls who want jerks when they know they themselves are not a jerk?
I mean...girls who go after this kind of guy are in it for 1.) the drama (which often ensues) and 2.) the danger.
If you have neither of those to offer, don't waste your time-go after a girl who wants the nice guy that will be there for her.
I have many friends who go after the jerks. I don't understand them and I'm not one of them. I bagged a nice guy and I'm holding onto him.
Hahaha! Really? You forgot sex. (which is before drama and danger) You are a 10/10 but now would not bang
A little confused about what you're trying to say...
Only bad boys know how to have sex? Only bad boys know how to have good sex?
Are you saying guys go after girls that want bad boys even though they themselves are not bad boys because they want sex?
So confused. Plus in my personal (and perhaps old-fashioned opinion) sex is better with someone that respects you. I understand what you are saying...but...this is how I feel.
Sorry. I guess I was being a jerk?
You asked "The better question is, why do guys go after the girls who want jerks when they know they themselves are not a jerk?"
When you ask why a guy goes after (actively pursues) a girl 99 times out of 100 its because he wants sex from her.
Being friends with someone, have a relationship with, and eventually falling in love with are completely different things. Thats not going after anything. Thats fate.
I see what you're saying. And Yeah-that's true for a lot of guys.
You're not being a jerk, just didn't understand what you had said.
And agreed-there's a big difference between falling in love-and the sex you have with that person-and going after someone with that one purpose in mind.
I just wanted clarification. I know a lot of people see it differently. I guess this is a frustrating subject for me because a good friend of mine cries to me all the time about how her boyfriend treats her (he is one of the "bad boys"/jerks) and she's told me things he does...he's not a nice person. he's cheated on her, he's emotionally and perhaps even physically hurt her...but she doesn't leave. I can't understand girls like that. Especially when she deserves and could easily have so much better.
A long time ago, that girls brother or father would beat that guys @$$ so bad he wouldnt act like that toward her or anyone else. Thats just the way it was. Keyword was.
I have a daughter and shes had the same boyfriend for a few years now. Better believe though that if he was ever out of line, someone might need to call 911. Just sayin0 -
I don't like jerks and I won't put up with them - I did in my late teens/early twenties, but I have more self respect than that now.
Same here. I'd much rather be alone than with a jerk. One of my neighbors has acted like a jerk to me before (I'm thinking it was his way of trying to get me into bed) and then was completely confused as to why I was never interested in him.
What if he's not a jerk to you but he's a jerk to everyone else? I've dated a couple bad boys and married a reformed bad boy (sort of) and he's kind of a *kitten* to people except for me and my family.0 -
The better question is, why do guys go after the girls who want jerks when they know they themselves are not a jerk?
I mean...girls who go after this kind of guy are in it for 1.) the drama (which often ensues) and 2.) the danger.
If you have neither of those to offer, don't waste your time-go after a girl who wants the nice guy that will be there for her.
I have many friends who go after the jerks. I don't understand them and I'm not one of them. I bagged a nice guy and I'm holding onto him.
Hahaha! Really? You forgot sex. (which is before drama and danger) You are a 10/10 but now would not bang
A little confused about what you're trying to say...
Only bad boys know how to have sex? Only bad boys know how to have good sex?
Are you saying guys go after girls that want bad boys even though they themselves are not bad boys because they want sex?
So confused. Plus in my personal (and perhaps old-fashioned opinion) sex is better with someone that respects you. I understand what you are saying...but...this is how I feel.
Sorry. I guess I was being a jerk?
You asked "The better question is, why do guys go after the girls who want jerks when they know they themselves are not a jerk?"
When you ask why a guy goes after (actively pursues) a girl 99 times out of 100 its because he wants sex from her.
Being friends with someone, have a relationship with, and eventually falling in love with are completely different things. Thats not going after anything. Thats fate.
I see what you're saying. And Yeah-that's true for a lot of guys.
You're not being a jerk, just didn't understand what you had said.
And agreed-there's a big difference between falling in love-and the sex you have with that person-and going after someone with that one purpose in mind.
I just wanted clarification. I know a lot of people see it differently. I guess this is a frustrating subject for me because a good friend of mine cries to me all the time about how her boyfriend treats her (he is one of the "bad boys"/jerks) and she's told me things he does...he's not a nice person. he's cheated on her, he's emotionally and perhaps even physically hurt her...but she doesn't leave. I can't understand girls like that. Especially when she deserves and could easily have so much better.
A long time ago, that girls brother or father would beat that guys @$$ so bad he wouldnt act like that toward her or anyone else. Thats just the way it was. Keyword was.
I have a daughter and shes had the same boyfriend for a few years now. Better believe though that if he was ever out of line, someone might need to call 911. Just sayin
I know my dad (and brother for that matter) would do the same, just like all good fathers/brothers.
Your daughter's lucky to have someone looking out for her...because these kinds of jerks are around. I guess I'm referring to maybe a different kind of jerk than the OP intended maybe...I think we can all agree that those kinds of guys are bad news bears.0 -
This thread is just depressing the hell out of me. :sad:0
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If by jerk, we are talking about the strong, confident, arrogant bad boy kind of thing..... Then I believe it's an instinctual thing. In nature, the females are attracted to the Alpha wolves of the pack because of her survival instincts and the fact she wants her pups to have the strongest possible bloodlines. But, if we are talking about just plain jerks, well, then I'm as puzzled as you are.
I was just about to say this myself. They're all the traits we need for survival; strength, confidence (could be seen as arrogance). It's just science. Haha
I believe this too! I have no idea why I am attracted to idiots, I just am!
There's a HUGE difference between being attracted to a strong, confident man and being attracted to an idiot or a jerk. Don't confuse the two.
Most girls who are attracted to *kitten* have had terrible role models and have no clue what a good man is. They go with what they know.
It is not that simple and is not the case the women I know. The ones I know are middle to upper class whos parents and grandparents are still happily married that come from a strong Christian background and are in church every time the door is open and let me tell you this, they live a true Christian life and have great role models but they just have bad taste in men. I am sure others like me also know other women who are just amazing people and would do anything in the world for anyone and was raised right but her man is a total p*nis.0 -
Some don't...0
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Some don't...
In that case, how you doin?
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You know... honestly... I don't like labelling anyone a jerk... male or female.
The reality is that what defines a jerk are behaviors, and at any time, an individual can choose non-jerk-like behavior. For some people, their propensity for jerk-like behavior is obvious... and at other times, it might not be so clear.
Sadly, in my case, by the time I have realized that someone is more inclined to be a jerk than not, I am already emotionally attached, and emotional attachment is hard to dispense with even when you are emotionally attached to a jerk. This is especially true for women, but can also be true for men.
It's sad and depressing, and as others have mentioned, I personally did not get any good examples growing up. I say this so often I make myself sick, but almost everyone in population, could benefit from a psychologist when it comes to navigating the realms and realities of love.
Now, I'm checking out of this thread cause its literally making me sick right now. I'm working on breaking an emotional attachment to a nice guy who chooses to be a jerk because some crazy ***** treated him like **** and he can't get over her long enough to see the amazing thing that's right in front of him. :brokenheart:0 -
Because assertiveness itself is attractive.
Assertiveness can manifest in a positive way (a confident, good man) or a negative way (the self-absorbed, mean *kitten*), but they are both assertive and both attractive. Hence, the "bad boy" trope.
The absence of assertiveness (being codependent, a doormat, or passive-aggressive) is what really is unattractive.0 -
Some don't...
In that case, how you doin?
:laugh: Doin gooood!0 -
Because assertiveness itself is attractive.
Assertiveness can manifest in a positive way (a confident, good man) or a negative way (the self-absorbed, mean *kitten*), but they are both assertive and both attractive. Hence, the "bad boy" trope.
The absence of assertiveness (being codependent, a doormat, or passive-aggressive) is what really is unattractive.
Agreed. It is all about having a balance. Many women want a guy to be sexually attracted to and not sees as an adorable puppy. There has to be some type of animal attraction there. Guys cant be thought of as like a brother. Also trying too hard, too agreeable, and being too easy is a turn off to many women.
Guys need to be confident, assertive, funny, fun, a little dangerous, not boring, outgoing, not a pushover, spontaneous, and don't ever be scared to go for it. The end of the day, the guy who goes after what he wants gets the woman.
To those who already know a certain woman and is getting the "awwwwe, you are the sweetest, adorable, and cutest nicest guy ever", then he needs to be careful because could be getting put in the friend zone.
Being the bad boy for years and then grew up and a nice guy now for years, I have a good balance and insight to both worlds.0 -
Honest truth? Guys who are labeled "jerks" are usually good looking, exciting, dangerous and good in bed.
But on the flip side, there are guys who like psycho women. You know that term, "Hot- Crazy Scale"? As long as they are hot, they are allowed to be crazy.
Dangerous? Mysterious? Are they describing Batman?
Or......
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELRRQIVKHF8
On the flip side "no amount of hot can cover up crazy".......0 -
it makes like a lot more fun! and interesting
and make up sex is the best0 -
1) All girls don't like jerks
2) Those that do have low self-esteem0 -
Same reason men love crazy loony bat women...the sex is good. Plus there's a little masochism in us all.0
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Tell me why?
Because they're great all-round fat burning exercises that push the CNS and develop explosive power.
Have I been watching too many powerlifting videos?0 -
Because I thought I could change him. Don't know. Horrible mistake though. I'd rather have a guy who's tough yet nice and may not show it a lot but certainly cares, one who doesn't act like he's the shi+. Basically someone like my dad yeah.0
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