What was your "last straw"???

considering elasticated trousers as a purchase

I'm still reading the posts throughout this thread. So many of your stories have brought tears to my eyes! Ugh, and my heart aches at the pain you must have felt when you endured your aches, embarrassments, and frustrations. No human should have to experience any of these things. ;A;

As for my story, well, I didn't really take the flag when I should have. I started gaining weight when I was about 10 or 11 years old. At first it was nothing. I was just a kid, my family said, and it was baby fat -- I'd burn it off! But I never did. it just kept adding to the fat I already had, year after year.

When I was about 16 or so the rage of diabetes seemed to flare. That was all my mother could ever talk about. And since I have poor circulation as it is (seems to run in the family), my body often falls asleep. That prickling from my feet falling asleep scared me the most. I would NOT have diabetes, I told myself! I biked seven and a half miles a day, starved myself to 1000 calories a day and lost about 20 pounds. That was when I was only 180 pounds going down to 160.

But 20 pounds seems to be my plateau number. After months of sticking at 20 pounds, and with winter snows on the streets, I couldn't work out. And since I couldn't work out, I gained weight. At that point, I gave up trying to lose weight.

Then when I was 18 going on 19, my mother took me to Weight Watchers. She was 50 pounds overweight herself (190, nearing 200), and I was sitting comfortably at 210 myself. I lost, again, 10 pounds on Weight Watchers, but after that I couldn't. Every week seeing my weight maintain or go up was incredibly depressing, as well as frustrating and humiliating. My mom could lose weight, my friends could lose weight, why not me? After three years of Weight Watchers I put my little tracking booklet down and left the group. We didn't have money for my failures.

My weight continued to balloon throughout the years of college. From 210 to 245 I rose, though slowly at first. A common pain I had had in my ankles (a flaring burn that would radiate up my calves all the way to my knees and engulf the entire circumference of my lower leg) became worse. Instead of gaining it only from walking fast, as I had in the past, I now gained it from walking slow. And I had it just from walking from the science building to the library next door. Trying to make it on time from one end of the campus to the other in less than ten minutes was near impossible, and I would often stagger into class limping and whimpering. Tears would sometimes lace the bottoms of my eyelids.

And sleeping became more difficult. Although I've never had sleep apnea (at least to my knowledge), I've had difficulty breathing when laying down. And sometimes even while sitting up. Laying on my left side would make my heart palpate and become irregular. My fingers, hands, toes and feet would become numb and prickle. Even other parts of my body were starting to feel these 'sleeping prickles' -- I would get them in my eyelids, my shoulders, my chest, my groin. It seemed no part of me was safe from the uncomfortable nerve pain.

And clothes... clothes kept growing too small. I hated having to shop a size up. I finally ran out of clothes that would actually fit, unless I went to stores that made clothes for bigger guys, like WalMart or Ross. Walking down the row of men's shorts and not finding a pair that could fit me was humiliating.

But none of those were the final straw. They should have been, but they were not. Instead, do you know what was the final straw?

This picture.


It was my first year at pride, I was super excited to be with a family I had been searching for for the last half of my life. I was so happy that day... and so heartbroken when friends started posting pictures of the events. I couldn't believe how ridiculous I looked! In fact I remember sobbing myself to sleep the night this picture was taken. How had I fallen so hard? How had I given up on myself like this?

Okay, granted, that picture was the worst of all my pictures, and in fact this picture is a little more representative of how I looked at 245:



Still, I was way too chubby for my own good. I was humiliated that my face was so chubby, my hands so small (and babyish with their chub), and overall how incompetent and ugly I perceived myself to be. From that day forth, I promised myself I would never weigh 245 ever again. I would never see numbers above it.

Last summer was hard. I picked up the weights, I started eating healthier, and I worked out every day at least once, sometimes twice. I lost 20 pounds the first month and a half, and slimmed down in appearance. But my inches didn't change. My clothing sizes didn't change. And my weight stopped changing. Three months of stagnant measuring results broke my spirit. And with school returning I no longer had energy to care. I came home, I ate what I wanted because I was exhausted, and then I did homework and slept. I didn't work out. I didn't count. I didn't care.

This year around January, I made a New Year's resolution; I would take photos of myself and measure visible progress that way. Well, the pictures were disgusting enough and my weight had gone back up to 239! But I still didn't have the motivation to work out and lose it.

This spring I knew I had my graduation coming up and I had my surgery coming up as well. I wanted to be as much in shape for it as I could be! So I took up seven PE classes. But three months of that and I didn't lose a single pound. No, I didn't even lose a point of a pound. Nothing. So I gave up AGAIN.

But the end of July hit, I got Bob Harper's Skinny Rules and Jumpstart to Skinny books. I finally had my motivation groove once again. I was not going to crawl up to 240 -- I had promised myself any number after 239 would NEVER grace my scale EVER AGAIN! And I meant it! So since July 20th of this year I've been working hard to eat right and exercise.

...And again I sit at my 20 pound plateau mark. But I can't keep giving up. What does giving up get me? Fat. That's all it does. I don't feel better eating higher caloric food. I don't feel better gaining weight. And I don't feel better looking in the mirror and seeing all this chub on my face and body.

Is this the last straw? I sure hope so. But I can't foresee the future. I cannot hate myself if I do give up and regain weight. But I can only hope I jump on it before I reach the 230s again, let alone ever another 240. And that's why I'm here! I'm hoping this website will keep me accountable to keep going, even when I don't think I can.

When I sat down I couldn't get my leg over my other leg and my mom is smaller than. What got me to lose more weight...This girl that lives in my area named Meredith went on Extreme weight loss to lose weight. Ever since I saw her do it I've been strongly motivated but prior to it I was already on my weight loss journey.

I live in Central Florida. My son just turned 12. This past spring he finally started getting over his fears about riding some of the bigger roller coasters, but he didn't want to go alone. I tried to take him, but I didn't fit in the $%^#!! seat.

when I moved from the farm to the city

My last straw was on Labor Day when I took my daughter swimming.

When we were done, I went into the bathroom to change. And that's when I really took notice of how truly fat I am. How my stomach had gotten so large, it looked as though I was 8 months pregnant again! I felt so disgusted and ashamed of myself...to let it get this bad... I knew something had to change...

All of the above (except sky diving - how did I miss THAT?), and not being able to breathe when putting on my shoes or giving myself a pedicure, the disgust I felt every time I saw my reflection in a window or mirror, and knowing full well that I was avoiding social events due to my shame...I could go on but won't. My thoughts on weight loss consumed me and I'd just eat more. Obviously, the weight didn't come on overnight, but I just kept thinking I'd deal with it "tomorrow." Finally, I realized that tomorrow never came, so I decided to deal with it "today."

Same.. I have been avoiding social situations coz I'm just too ashamed.. its' as if my life's been put on hold coz I'm so fat.

Sometimes this thought would lead me to binge, which obviously doesn't help me lose weight.

I really have to remember that its TODAY that I need to work on. No more "start tomorrow"

Honestly, I was sick of being fat and lazy. I felt like I had become a pathetic, excuse making, panzy that was a shadow of my former self.

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I was also saying "ooof" on getting up from the sofa as well as doing sumo impressions to get into my jeans, much to the amusement of everyone except me. Bad back, bad knees, bad hips and achilles tendon burn - all weight related problems. The final final straw was a photo of myself in 2007 (when I used to be thin and lean and fit) and then saying inwardly "my God, what have you done to your body?) It all changed then. Joined MFP a little way into my weight loss programme on a friend's recommendation and it has helped me enormously. Total not reflected here but am 2st 4lbs lighter since I started altogether and not missing the crap food or the sofa slouching!

-None of my clothes fit and finally admitting to myself that I am only getting bigger.
-Stepping on a scale and seeing the number 5lbs heavier than what I had always considered my heaviest weight ever.
-Seeing photos of myself and feeling like I don't recognize myself anymore.
-Having to buy new work clothes because I don't fit in the old ones...and we wear scrubs so there should be no excuses!!

Wow! it feels pretty good to write those down, like a release or something

Being bullied at school, lost 120 lbs and never looked back ever since

Woke up last Saturday & was just tired of my clothes getting to tight & sick of all the fast food. I've been on & off of MFP since probably 2011, but this time I made a twelve month plan that I put into action Sept 3rd. My first week is going very well, now my test will be this weekend.

What I really get disgusted at is when I'm out & pass a store window or mirror & see my reflection. That really gets me in the mood to do something about my weight. Maybe if I had big mirrors in my apartment I would be smaller.

Hi
I'm Vicky, many things were going on in my life, that lead me to eating to satisfy my emptiness, I had recently had a miscarriage, and along with that I got a divorce then soon after I got the call that my Dad was sick with Cancer and had one year to live. Within a week I lost my job. I ended up moving back home with my parents to take care of my mom & dad. Going back on Welfare. Very disappointing cause I had been up for a promotion at work, also going to college to get out of my dead end job. Now, I was back in a town that I spent my whole life trying to get out of. To deal with the stress I started to walk. I first would go just a couple of blocks, then a mile, then five, then ten, and ended up walking 60 miles a day. That's when the doc. told me I had developed arthritis in my feet. Now, I just stayed home and ate. When I had found the time look for work, I got a job at a banquet hall. The doc. sent me to a podiatrist where he would form some inserts in my shoes that wouldn't hurt my feet. Then, I started working up to 90 hours every two weeks. After my dad died, my mom had a stroke. So, when I wasn't working I was walking. I then joined a TOPS support group, because I had gained 80 lbs. from the banquet hall. I'm still struggling. Ten years later, mom passed away and the arthritis has gone to my hips and knees. I've tried "Sitting Fitness". It seems to work.

When I had a scheduled surgery and the surgeon told me I was fat and needed to lose some weight to see if that resolved my problem. Then my GYN told me I needed to lose weight once I stepped off the scale, and when I was on 3 different types of blood pressure meds and meds for diabetes and lastly was when I saw a picture of myself and saw how fat I really was.