No one cares what I'm accomplishing

24

Replies

  • jetscreaminagain
    jetscreaminagain Posts: 1,130 Member
    Like everyone else, I say you're doing this for you not someone else and until that changes, you're probably shortchanging yourself in all aspects of your life.

    But also

    This is where you get to be purposeful about who you let in your life and spend your limited time with. Your family isn't into it. Fine?. What about your friends? If no, create friends who are. People at work, in the gym or your running club to start. A friends lust here of supportive strangers on the Internet. You want it? Go get it. Don't just sit there sad that you don't have it. And until that changes, you're probably shortchanging yourself in all aspects of your life.
  • kindasortachewy
    kindasortachewy Posts: 1,084 Member
    Get some good MFP friends, get an instagram, join a runners group on facebook
  • MyOwnSunshine
    MyOwnSunshine Posts: 1,312 Member
    I've recently learned that it can be valuable to "compartmentalize" your life. People who are not actively involved in the same endeavors that you are focusing on tend to not care much about your achievements in that area.

    I have MFP friends who care about my healthy eating and fitness accomplishments. Other people don't particularly care about my lifting PRs or losing a pound.

    I have school friends who care about the challenges and stresses that are inherent in working through a doctorate program while also working full-time. Others don't get it.

    I have supportive co-workers who understand the ins and outs of working as a nurse, supervising a department and dealing with dealing with difficult people in a health care environment. Others don't understand.

    Find people who are engaged in a similar challenge and participate in an active process of mutual support.
  • By the way Congratulations on slicing off that 5 minutes off your time you must feel really proud of yourself :) keep up the good work!
  • ihad
    ihad Posts: 7,463 Member
    I've recently learned that it can be valuable to "compartmentalize" your life. People who are not actively involved in the same endeavors that you are focusing on tend to not care much about your achievements in that area.

    I have MFP friends who care about my healthy eating and fitness accomplishments. Other people don't particularly care about my lifting PRs or losing a pound.

    I have school friends who care about the challenges and stresses that are inherent in working through a doctorate program while also working full-time. Others don't get it.

    I have supportive co-workers who understand the ins and outs of working as a nurse, supervising a department and dealing with dealing with difficult people in a health care environment. Others don't understand.

    Find people who are engaged in a similar challenge and participate in an active process of mutual support.

    Good advice.
  • bunkahes
    bunkahes Posts: 216 Member
    If u want to chat anytime I am here
  • Arnegard
    Arnegard Posts: 22 Member
    You shouldn't be doing this for anyone else but yourself.

    This. Celebrate yourself.
  • 12skipafew99100
    12skipafew99100 Posts: 1,669 Member
    :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: Great job!:drinker: :drinker: :drinker:

    I am proud of you
  • DopeItUp
    DopeItUp Posts: 18,771 Member
    If you're relying on other people for motivation you're going to be forever disappointed. Find a different source of motivation.
  • stumblinthrulife
    stumblinthrulife Posts: 2,558 Member
    If you attach your goals to getting praise and attention you'll be screwed sooner or later. Say you get your attention? What then? People won't be fawning over the 'new you' forever.

    You need self-motivation to start, tenacity to reach your goals, and discipline to maintain them thereafter.

    Motivation is for whiners with no discipline.
  • MoreBean13
    MoreBean13 Posts: 8,701 Member
    Motivation is a by-product of determination.
  • Alliwan
    Alliwan Posts: 1,245 Member
    I have MFP friends to tell about my fitness accomplishments, because IRL people don't want to hear about that shiz all the time. People that are already fit aren't impressed and unfit people feel like you're harassing them about their sedentary lives. Get with friends here, it will help your progress and your IRL relationships.

    ^this! I use mfp friends to say 'yay, go you!' cause everyone loves to hear it once in awhile. and IRL people just are like great, now can i haz dinner? or where are my work pants? etc

    so use mfp to get your accomplishments congratulated
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
    Does anyone need more proof that patting kids on the head and saying "good job" for just showing up isn't working?

    You don't get to expect "good jobs" every time you do something right. Learn to find your motivation within.
  • rsalty
    rsalty Posts: 68 Member
    I get a fair amount of "you're doing it wrong" as feedback. I keep records, and have graphs that make it pretty clear how right the path is, whether or not I'm doing steps heel-toe-toe-heel or heel-toe-heel-toe.

    Iron: make your hemoglobin *and* your willpower out of it.
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    I sort of assued from the beginning that no one except me would really care about my weight loss process, so I tend to be pleasantly surprised when anybody shows interest or compliments me. Idk, that's just me.
  • fitfreakymom
    fitfreakymom Posts: 1,400 Member
    I kind of get where you're coming from. I get the same feeling when I go food shopping with my mom. I'm vegetarian and she gives me looks when I choose the organic things/meat substitute options to put into the cart, which I can understand. Yes they're more expensive, but I don't make them the primary thing that I eat because of this. I know we're on a budget, so I only get a few things, but I still wish that she wouldn't be a complete ***** in how she goes about doing things because honestly, I'm not going to change my eating habits. I'd rather just eat peanut butter and bread then go back.

    But like the others have said, you have to do this for yourself. If you continue to seek your families approval, you will continue to be unfulfilled.

    are you able to buy your own stuff?
  • I care!!!

    But you should really just be doing it for yourself!

    ^_^ keep up the good work and dont stop.... use your families "not caring" attitude as a push... a push to make yourself better so that soon they will go "Holy crap when did you get so fit??? WOW"

    You got this!
  • fitfreakymom
    fitfreakymom Posts: 1,400 Member
    Just do it for you and pat yourself on the back, there are people like me out there that do not compliment people who are fishing for compliments, I will compliment people on stuff at times but not when they are fishing.
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  • OP - Troll!
  • billievoyle
    billievoyle Posts: 8 Member
    I think the main focus is that you are suppose to be doing this for yourself I know it would be nice to recieve some praise from those closest ie family and friends but you are not always going to get that. So don't be discouraged your doing a great job keep it up they will eventually notice. :)
  • Stage14
    Stage14 Posts: 1,046 Member
    Does anyone need more proof that patting kids on the head and saying "good job" for just showing up isn't working?

    You don't get to expect "good jobs" every time you do something right. Learn to find your motivation within.

    Sadly, this is exactly what I was thinking.
  • scottkjar
    scottkjar Posts: 346 Member
    You are unhappy that others are not emotionally invested in your journey. Have you been emotionally invested in their journeys? When they got a good grade, or a new certification, or a promotion, or accomplished something in their respective fields, or a new rare stamp, or a good fantasy football draft, or won $20 at the race track, were you excited for them? Or did you shrug it off because you were not emotionally invested in that outcome?

    Be sure you are not complaining about others not doing something for you if you are not doing it for them first.
  • MrsFowler1069
    MrsFowler1069 Posts: 657 Member
    Personally I feel you are looking for motivation in the wrong places. I agree that its nice to get compliments about weight loss or acknowledgement from family members/friends when you accomplish something, but it shouldn't be expected or required to keep you going. It should just be bonus motivation. The real core motivation to keep you going should come from within, whatever that may be. You have to believe in yourself and that you can do it, because if you yourself don't believe, who else will?


    Yes.
  • amandatapar
    amandatapar Posts: 246 Member
    I get the most support from here. I am losing weight because I want to and I want to be healthier. My family is happy for me of course but not near as excited as the people on here. Reward yourself once in a while with something non food related. I love new running shoes, new clothes, etc.
  • You shouldn't be doing this for anyone else but yourself.


    This
  • teamAmelia
    teamAmelia Posts: 1,247 Member
    Maybe they just don't understand how important it is for you. You even said that your whole family has no problem with exercising.

    And, like everyone else said, you shouldn't be exercising to get a reaction fro your family. You should be doing it because you want to. You can always get support from us. We're your fitness pals (couldn't resist).
  • OhDD65
    OhDD65 Posts: 185 Member
    You have to do this just for yourself. Any family etc that already exercises I have found doesn't seem impressed or even half
    hardily interested. They seem totally into their own accomplishments. Like so many of us it is something that we have tried to do for many years. Stay with it..... every little bit of accomplishment adds up over time. Most of my support comes from my friends that I have made on MFP. We all have similar things we want to accomplish and I have found MFP has actually helped me lose for the 1st time in my life. Still have 25# to go, but I can do it and so can you...... Hang in there !
  • blah2989
    blah2989 Posts: 338 Member
    Im lucky because my fiance will just randomly look at me and say you are doing so good. My friends are supportive and I do sharw my mile times with my bff, because she runs too and we motivate each other, but even if I never got a good job from them, that would be ok. Its me that should be proud of myself. Thats why I have mfp. I have friends that keep me on track. I do it for myself... no one else. But people have noticed, which is nice.
  • nelinelineli
    nelinelineli Posts: 330 Member
    I couldn't agree more with the "do it for yourself mentality".

    I personally struggle with it, however. That's why I have MFP friends.:)