Rock's Ultimate Guide to Super Fitness

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24

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  • Chief_Rocka
    Chief_Rocka Posts: 4,710 Member
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    Won't I just get bulky?

    Keep your sodium down, I hear it makes you fat
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
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    U R so mean!
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
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    Bumping.

    Keep it simple, silly.
  • IronCakes
    IronCakes Posts: 317 Member
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    How to warm up: Lift weight light

    How to get stronger: Lift weights heavy

    How to gain muscle: Lift weights and eat more

    How to lose fat: Lift weights and eat less

    How to do cardio: Lift weights fast

    How to do other cardio: Sex

    I'll open up the floor for questions.

    Fixed.
  • InForBacon
    InForBacon Posts: 1,508 Member
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    Won't I just get bulky?

    Keep your sodium down, I hear it makes you fat
    So now I have to lift and limit my bacon intake. I don't think this guide is going to work for me. I'm a special unicorn shaped snowflake.
  • InForBacon
    InForBacon Posts: 1,508 Member
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    How to warm up: Lift weight light

    How to get stronger: Lift weights heavy

    How to gain muscle: Lift weights and eat more

    How to lose fat: Lift weights and eat less

    How to do cardio: Lift weights fast

    How to do other cardio: Sex

    I'll open up the floor for questions.

    Fixed.
    Ok, I can work with this.
  • Fitfully_me
    Fitfully_me Posts: 647 Member
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    How to do cardio: Lift weights fast

    lol nice.

    LMBO
  • _crafty_
    _crafty_ Posts: 1,682 Member
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    How to warm up: Lift weight light

    How to get stronger: Lift weights heavy

    How to gain muscle: Lift weights and eat more

    How to lose fat: Lift weights and eat less

    How to do cardio: Lift weights fast

    How to do other cardio: Sex

    I'll open up the floor for questions.

    Fixed.

    perfect
  • Mischievous_Rascal
    Mischievous_Rascal Posts: 1,791 Member
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    Yup, and there is the extra cardio benefit of fighting off all those bears we attract!

    Coffee laughed out all over on my keyboard...thanks!!! :)
  • K_Serz
    K_Serz Posts: 1,299 Member
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    What happens when its that Time Of the Month?

    Bleed everywhere.
    Eat chocolate.
    Bleed some more.
    Lift weights.
    After 7 days bloat is gone.

    2cwwvb6.jpg

    Yup, and there is the extra cardio benefit of fighting off all those bears we attract!

    2efuivb.jpg
  • Alex_is_Hawks
    Alex_is_Hawks Posts: 3,499 Member
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    What happens when its that Time Of the Month?

    Bleed everywhere.
    Eat chocolate.
    Bleed some more.
    Lift weights.
    After 7 days bloat is gone.

    2cwwvb6.jpg

    let me let you into a secret.....

    we also get repeatedly stabbed on a regular basis and don't die....

    women=superheroes
  • cleotherio
    cleotherio Posts: 712 Member
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    Won't I just get bulky?

    Yes you will, don't lift.

    What if I lift pink weights? Will they keep me from getting bulky?

    pinkbarbell.jpg
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
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    What happens when its that Time Of the Month?

    Bleed everywhere.
    Eat chocolate.
    Bleed some more.
    Lift weights.
    After 7 days bloat is gone.

    2cwwvb6.jpg

    Yup, and there is the extra cardio benefit of fighting off all those bears we attract!

    2efuivb.jpg

    We call that "chum."

    Good for shark fish'n.
  • homerjspartan
    homerjspartan Posts: 1,893 Member
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    What if lifting weights makes me poop myself?

    That reminds me I have to stop at Target on the way home.
  • rlinaresv
    rlinaresv Posts: 108
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    Alex_is_Hawks,

    That was so hillarious. Thanks for sharing the secret. Frigging awesome hehehehehe
  • ZoeLifts
    ZoeLifts Posts: 10,347 Member
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    How to warm up: Lift weight light

    How to get stronger: Lift weights heavy

    How to gain muscle: Lift weights and eat more

    How to lose fat: Lift weights and eat less

    How to do cardio: Lift weights fast


    I'll open up the floor for questions.

    What if I want to lose fat and get stronger? Do I lift heavy food and eat less weights?
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
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    What if lifting weights makes me poop myself?

    That reminds me I have to stop at Target on the way home.

    Might I suggest Costco for your pooping needs? They actually keep it clean!
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
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    So what you're saying is I need to run more?

    Confusing message is confusing.
  • BruteSquad
    BruteSquad Posts: 373 Member
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    But what about those that want to loose weight? I read a lot about that.
  • Alex_is_Hawks
    Alex_is_Hawks Posts: 3,499 Member
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    But what about those that want to loose weight? I read a lot about that.

    they need to eat more cauliflower

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