Help! Peer pressure to eat poorly

It's weird...I see these posts a lot...in my experience, I just say, "no thanks" and that's pretty much that.

It's the worst... Happened to me in the summer, weekend away with 4 girlfriends, I was supposed to eat and drink massive amounts at meals just MASSIVE inbetween snacks and treats...

I kept saying 'No thanks, I don't want it!'. To an endless chorus of 'Is that all you're having?' 'But you're thin you don't need to worry!' 'Why come away for the weekend if you're not going to enjoy yourself?'.

I had no answers. It was awkward. Feel for ya OP!

I use "no thank you, I don't eat that" quite often. My "diet" isn't restrictive by any means, I eat anything and everything I want, I just don't crave much processed/ "unhealthy" food because I know how I feel after eating it (like crap). I know I, personally, get a ton of crap from friends and family, but if you stick to your guns long enough they eventually get bored of pestering and pressuring you. I know for many of my friends its the "my diet plan is to feed my friends more cupcakes than me" idea that causes them to pressure those of us who do live relatively healthy lifestyles.

Don't make your comments about restriction. Try things like "that looks really good but I couldn't possibly fit it in", "I'm really in the mood for nice big salad today", "I feel so much better when I eat x", "I'm here to spend time with you and I can do that no matter what I eat" "You should definitely have the fries if that's what you feel like, but I feel more like x today", "I'd really love to have x but I'm saving room for cake later" etc. If you can make her beleive you actually want the salad/veggies then she'll be even more envious.

Don't focus on the negatives like "I can't have x food", "my diet doesn't allow that", "that won't fit in my calories", "OMG that's disgusting, do you know how much fat is in that"

P.s. somtimes I think I use these situations as an excuse to go crazy. Makes you feel better about it when it's someone else's idea. It's really me who's doing the sabotage not my friend or family member. You are the only one in complete control of what goes in your mouth

They are using you as an excuse to eat things they know they shouldn't be eating themselves. Don't let them make you their enabler. If they are truely your friend, they would allow you to order what you wanted. If they had a lick of sense, they would know that eating what they want you to eat will throw your body into shock, and you will feel horrible (physically) afterwards. Not counting what you will have to do to make up for something that you ate that was off your diet. It would be a different story is say you loved cheesecake, and had not had it in a while, and ate it with them. At least it would have been something you enjoyed, and you would have happily satisfied a craving and moved on.

I find this to be more of an issue visiting in-laws that I only kinda-sorta know, don't want to be rude to, and just won't take no for an answer.

For people that are close to me, I just tell them that I'm ordering X because that's what I'm in the mood to eat, leave me alone about it. I try not to mention any weight loss goals because then I open myself up to "I thought you're on a diet" the second you eat something that they think is unhealthy.

I want to say no because I obviously want to go for the healthier option but I also don't want to be completely left out of all flat activities because then I'll just be a social outcast for the whole year.

You could make friends with people who like to do more than stuff their faces with pizza in front of the TV or go out for Chinese food everyday, no?

Other posters already hit the nail on the head.

If you don't want the food, say no to it. You're the one who has to deal with the after effects of the sodium and feeling bloated or nauseated later.

I know people want to be able to celebrate and eat what they want, I get it, but if it's going to make you feel gross, don't.

I mean I love me some food, obviously, but if it was alcohol, and friends were like, 'c'mon on, c'mon on! have another it's my birthday!' and I'm sitting there counting calories in my head for a raspberry margarita plus a shot and knowing if I do it I'm going to get a carb load, then a sugar crash once the alcohol hits, plus blow my calories for the day . . . ack no!

I'll order a light beer or just say I don't feel like drinking tonight.

It's the same thing for food. Your cousin wanted a partner in crime. Without judging her for eating whatever she wanted, you should get to eat whatever you want, even if that's a salad or some grilled chicken.

IF you have to, lie and say you feel kinda queasy and want to take it easy on your stomach.

As for the social stuff, emerald, you can eat wings, you can drink beer, you can have pizza, and takeaway, and everything else, you just have to eat less of it to balance out the calories. You'll have to 'fill up' on less calorie dense food or just deal with feeling hungry. But, you can still be social with friends and food.

You make them feel guilty about their current physical condition. Therefore, if they can get you to eat the same thing they're eating then they don't have to feel so guilty. It you do not give in, then they blame you for having the "holier then thou" attitude so that they can again blame their feeling of guilt on you.

You could show her how much fun MFP is and try to get her to do this with you.

I visited my cousin for a four-day weekend, which included both her birthday and another relative's wedding. I felt backed into the corner because my cousin associates a celebration with total gluttony. I heard the following throughout the weekend:

"You HAVE to get the waffle fries" and later "You have to use the sour cream dip with the fries!" "Come on, is that really all you're going to eat? Finish your burger like the rest of us...unless you didn't like it?"

A few hours and a 1300-calorie dinner later: "I only want to go to Applebee's if we can get a half price app. Can you seriously not fit in some chips and dip?"

"You can't order salad at a Mexican place! Get a burrito with beans and cheese."

"You have to get chocolate, too, otherwise I'll feel guilty!"

"Um, why do you eat so many vegetables. You're so skinny already!"

As much as I love this cousin, this weekend was way too much for me. Because it was her birthday weekend, I actually ended up giving in and eating a ton of crap I had no interest in. It sucks to have a healthy-looking body and for people with less healthy-looking bodies (like my cousin) to try to get me to match their appetites.

Does anyone have advice for how I should deal with this in the future? What have you done in similar situations?

My ex husband was incredibly fat - he was spherical. And when we would visit his mother, she would use him as the family rubbish tin. Ten minutes after telling him to go on a diet, she would be trying to feed him the last of the macaroni cheese, or the remains of the roast. "Eat it, or it will just go to waste!" she would say, firing it onto his plate.

One time, when i knew he was actually on a diet, I looked her in the eye and said 'if you don't want it, throw it in the bin.' "Oh I couldn't, what a waste!" "It's gone either way" I said. "It was a waste from the moment you made extra."

I didn't let her fire it onto his plate.

Basically, next time you have someone forcing food on you, look them straight in the eye and say 'do you not care about what I want?'

"Are you trying to manipulate me into ruining my diet?" Call it like you see it. Then proffer a rubbish bin and tell them to throw it in there.