Online dating websites

2

Replies

  • ashandstuff
    ashandstuff Posts: 442 Member
    Been ok OKC for awhile and I am so...unimpressed. I'd say 80% of the messages I get are like this:

    "hey bb what u do 4 me?" (probably has more than one picture of only his abs. No face pictures)
    "can i ask y a qusnt?" After I don't respond for a week "k ***** hert like ice"
    "hey :)" (You will get 30+ of these a week)
    "gurl u r beautiful. dat smile wow. blew my mind"
    "Hey lol RAWR XD" Dude, you are 30 years old lay off the Deviantart emoticons.
    "i take u to coffee we talk sometime deep?" (foreign guy that doesn't speak English well)
    "My wife and I are looking for someone to join us in the bedroom" (not my style, sorry friend. You will get 1 message a week like this)

    Been there and really trying for two months now and NO LUCK. Some guys are decent to chat with but I wouldn't want to date any of them so far. Good luck though. Prepare for awkward messages.

    This is too funny because it is so true. I cant tell you how many guys I have had and woman mind you that have said my spouse and I want a 3way...Im like seriously. And the dudes that dont speak English, the guys that have nothing better to entice you with than Hey :), and then the few who dont even have a profile picture but try to get you to send them some. Too funny

    Haha on one hand, I'm happy that I wasn't alone in getting creepy messages. But on the other, sorry it hasn't really worked for you either!!!!
  • abheshek
    abheshek Posts: 525 Member
    I am thinking about "getting on the market" again.. Has anyone tried any online dating websites? Any recommendations? Warnings? lolol...

    online dating is the last thing i would ever do.....
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    I met my husband on match.

    I did match and chemistry. My advice would be to use a pay site unless you are seeking casual sex, use a site that lets you browse and contact members (so not chemistry and not eharmony, which send you matches), and set your profile to private (if you are a chick, I didn't look) and message/wink whatever the people YOU are interested in. Otherwise you will get 10-20 messages a day. If you are a dude, be careful about how many messages/winks you send -- paying attention to quality of message.

    ETA: I just relooked at your profile picture -- so chick. You will have much more success if you look and reach out to men. They don't get nearly as many messages/winks. Go after dudes with filled out profiles and pictures. Ignore anyone who messages you without a profiled that isn't filled out.
  • doctorsookie
    doctorsookie Posts: 1,084 Member
    I met my fiance four years ago on Plenty of Fish. My coworker met her fiance on Match. It can happen. There are bad people out there but there is also good people out there. Kevin is very shy and I never would have met him if he hadn't signed up and i can't imagine my life without him. And believe me just like with all relationships you have your ups and downs so i have tried to imagine my life without him but he's my soul mate and i just can't do it. I almost mussed him too because he was about to give up and cancel his account. You should join a few and see what happens...good luck to you.
  • ThePlight
    ThePlight Posts: 3,593 Member
    Uhm, I have to admit. I once made an account to troll people on dating sites my mother used to visit. Not going to lie.
    Personally, I think they're garbage unless you're looking for a quick booty call. Honest opinion.
  • ashandstuff
    ashandstuff Posts: 442 Member
    I use pornhub.com

    Mom, Dad, meet my new girlfriend....my right hand.
  • mrsamanda86
    mrsamanda86 Posts: 869 Member
    I used to see my husband at the place I worked at all the time and we would somewhat flirt but we were both too shy to take it any further. Then I found him on myspace and started talking to him on there. We've now been married 8 years. I think dating sites can definitely work, but you're going to be doing a lot of weeding! When I was single just on like myspace I would get some creepy dudes trying to talk to me. I'm glad I got ugly or something because it doesn't happen anymore(could just be my excessive photos of my kids and the fact I have married on my profile now lol). I think guys just generally suck at trying to flirt, it usually either comes across like he's a douche or awkward.
  • la8ydi
    la8ydi Posts: 294 Member
    Well I think I've tried them all...lol. Eharmony was by FAR the worst - I did (twice) the 3 month subscription (didn't learn the first time) and didn't find ONE profile that they sent which attracted me. Now before I get slammed, they were sending me profiles of guys in their 60s and I was either in my late 30s or early 40s. I adjusted my age range and still got men much older. (I'm not opposed to an older guy - just closer to my age.) I did Match with some success...but just haven't met "the one" yet. Currently on POF, but like someone else said, the free sites tend to attract a lot of people looking for one night stands or to cheat. I tried Christian Mingle but that just wasn't what I was looking for. You would think that the Christian part would weed out the pervs, but no such luck. I did Yahoo Personals for a bit - but they discontinued that.

    Internet dating isn't for everyone. I've learned a LOT about people and a lot about myself and what I'm looking for. It's not all about being socially awkward and not being able to talk to people - I think it's more about finding people who you would've never had a chance to meet otherwise.

    Red flags: no photos (usually married or has gf), ask if he lives with his parents (if so, WHY), looking just to hook up, gives you his phone number or wants to meet up immediately, recently divorced (watch out for rebound situations) or going through a separation (same), no pics below the shoulders OR no pics above the shoulders. There are many, many more. Good luck!!!!
  • RllyGudTweetr
    RllyGudTweetr Posts: 2,019 Member
    I am thinking about "getting on the market" again.. Has anyone tried any online dating websites? Any recommendations? Warnings? lolol...

    online dating is the last thing i would ever do.....
    So, you're saying it's on the list.
  • Kirstyw871
    Kirstyw871 Posts: 216 Member
    I met my fella on POF.

    There was definitely a few weirdos on there, but not everyone is a freak on there.
  • Tinydancer91
    Tinydancer91 Posts: 17 Member
    I met my bf on one early this summer. don't knock it til ya try it! we're not the type of ppl to do online dating but we both took that chance and I'm glad we did. he's the most physically perfect person I've ever had the pleasure of meeting in my life. and with a heart of gold and funny sense of humor to match! I had my profile up for less than a week, and just one picture posted. I strongly suggest you sign up for okcupid. (and yes, he's the one posing with me in my default :))
  • TamTastic
    TamTastic Posts: 19,224 Member
    I have tried them. Not much luck.I am a divorced, single mother with two young boys. It just seems like the majority (not all) are on there to play games..or to see how many they can hook up with. I think it sort of takes the magic and work out of dating and relationships if that makes sense. Too many seem to be trying to create this perfect Stepford robot person..rather than realize not one person is going to meet your criteria exactly..and looking for that perfection is really not healthy! lol! And many are doing the "luck of the draw" thing. Talking to multiple people at one time. How do you truly get to know someone then?

    But then I think I'm a nice person, decent, genuine, etc etc and I have been on there.....so maybe there are others like me!! It just takes weeding through the not so great ones which I don't have a lot of time for! LOL!

    So I have not been on one or some time now! :tongue:
  • ronit_rai
    ronit_rai Posts: 325 Member
    single since 1995
    still satisfying myself with the porn sites :)
  • AnnaZimm70
    AnnaZimm70 Posts: 218 Member
    I met my now husband on-line. eHarmony initially suggested me to him when I got a free profile, but was actually connected through Match as I didn't want to pay the eHarmony rate. I have several friends that have met current spouses, fiances, etc. on-line. What I liked was that I knew up front what we had a common, etc. rather than worrying that someone was later conforming answers to what they thought I would want to hear.

    The best advice I got was: (1) Don't post your best, most flattering photo. Better for someone to be pleasantly surprised then to be expecting you as you looked 6 years ago after a professional make-up session! (2) Be honest in your profile. (3) Keep an open mind. I didn't go into the process hoping to find someone to marry. Rather, I had recently moved and just wanted to go out for dinner or spend some time with another adult (rather than just my little kids) occassionally. I figured if a particular match didn't work it wasn't a big deal, just another chance to meet someone interesting.
  • toddis
    toddis Posts: 941 Member
    I've been on and off the free sites for years and so far haven't found anything special. The two people I know that did actually married people they had known and just lost contact with over the years.

    You might consider something like meetup to find people to hang out with similar interests.
  • Hezzietiger1
    Hezzietiger1 Posts: 1,256 Member
    i did eharmony in 3 different states- ohio, alabama, colorado.. just met guys who were insecure, awkward, and uncomfortable with themselves lol..

    Then I tried pof..b/c its free.. just a bunch of uglier guys wanting sex lol

    I dunno. I'm thinking about getting back on the market too..but I dunno.
  • livelaughlove384
    livelaughlove384 Posts: 100
    I actually met my husband this way. We "met" at plentyoffish.com. Do not get me wrong there are sceeves on there and are only looking to get a piece of @$$, but there are genuine guys on there looking for love. Best of luck!
  • nippoleon
    nippoleon Posts: 43 Member
    OKCupid is a lot better than POF, in my opinion. I've used both, and the only guy I met on POF I only talked to through OKCupid (my current boyfriend <3).
    I find the OKC environment brings out a lot more discussion; on POF all I ever got was "Hey, how are you?" which is kind of a horrible way to start a conversation in comparison to several paragraphs, questions, or jokes.
  • toddis
    toddis Posts: 941 Member
    OKCupid is a lot better than POF, in my opinion. I've used both, and the only guy I met on POF I only talked to through OKCupid (my current boyfriend <3).
    I find the OKC environment brings out a lot more discussion; on POF all I ever got was "Hey, how are you?" which is kind of a horrible way to start a conversation in comparison to several paragraphs, questions, or jokes.

    I've found OKcupid to be like...Target and
    POF to be like Walmart.

    OKCupid definitely has some creepy stuff on it, the user submitted questions can be downright weird (And can be skipped), but definitely a different caliber of people.
  • SkinnyBubbaGaar
    SkinnyBubbaGaar Posts: 389 Member
    Just a bit of advice to make sure you avoid this one....


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjQvVBZgI_k


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q4O535ORbgI


    lowered-expectations.jpg
  • KnitSewSpin
    KnitSewSpin Posts: 147 Member
    Met my husband on eharmony 9 years ago. He's a wonderful man!
  • mel_2812
    mel_2812 Posts: 66 Member
    Met my boyfriend almost (already) 3 years ago on POF.

    He's the kind of man every women deserves and should have. I consider myself so lucky to have him by my side.

    We're looking to buy a house together after we return from our 1 month trip in Europe (planned for May 2014). I would love to say ''Yes I do'' one day and have my children with him. Slowly but surely! :)
  • Mobilemuscle
    Mobilemuscle Posts: 945 Member
    Did it for a number of years looking around.... lots of dates, nothin ever lasted past a few months....

    took my profiles down 2 years ago... a lot less dates...and I seem to get stood up a lot more often by getting dates from friends, or girls I meet while out and about....

    maybe im losing my sex appeal?

    Either way, good luck OP....if anything the online dating jungle isnt boring
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    I met the BF on yahoooooooo! that was when it was a little easier to search profiles. Never had any luck with any of the others except for adult friend finders but those weren't going to become anything more than fun.
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member

    ETA: I just relooked at your profile picture -- so chick. You will have much more success if you look and reach out to men. They don't get nearly as many messages/winks. Go after dudes with filled out profiles and pictures. Ignore anyone who messages you without a profiled that isn't filled out.

    You know this is probably good advice. I think as women we often adopt the let him approach me first attitude, and maybe with online you do have to be a bit more aggressive.

    Although I remember being more aggressive on a BBW dating site and still found the guys just wanted casual. Not sure, but yeah dating sucks.
  • ThePlight
    ThePlight Posts: 3,593 Member
    I met the BF on yahoooooooo! that was when it was a little easier to search profiles. Never had any luck with any of the others except for adult friend finders but those weren't going to become anything more than fun.
    Woohoo, congrats haha. I met mine online as well, but not on a dating site. Actually, the bf and I started as "enemies" and then became friends with insults, now total cuddlebuds haha.

    The online world can surprise us all, but personally, I would have rather stayed single than to go on a dating site :|
  • WannabeStressFree
    WannabeStressFree Posts: 340 Member
    As someone who has used dating sites off and on for awhile, I would stick to meeting someone in real life, not online - especially do not use POF (plenty of fish), the only people I have met on there in person ended up being really nasty men as in not nice. I honestly think a majority of people online do not have the social skills to date in real life and love to hide behind a computer and cell phone, they are one way talking through texting and act completely different when you meet them. I've given up the whole online things and am happy working out for now and getting the healthy lifestyle I've always wanted :)

    ^^^ This above for me. I tried Match, POF, OK Cupid.
    I met a great guy on Match, but it didn't work out. Otherwise POF and OKCupid: lots of junk to sift through, it's disheartening for me and rather be off them. I know a lot of great couples that met online, so I know it's a good outlet for some.
    I'm also trying to be happy working out and being happy! Maybe I'll try them again, just not now.
  • rubble20
    rubble20 Posts: 8 Member
    I've actually done the online dating thing quite a bit. In my opinion it depends on what you are looking for. Plenty of fish pof.com is great for dating. Get a lot of weirdos on there for sure, and I could tell you a lot of stories haha but there's a lot of good guys too. I've done pof off and on for the last 5 years. POF is also free which is nice.
    If you want a relationship, I'd try match.com. I only tried this site once because there's a monthly fee involved but the people on that site definitely seem to be more interested in finding an actual relationship as opposed to one night stand.
    Did not really like okcupid. I think that's just me though because a friend of mine has used it and has actually had a bit of luck on there.
    Eharmony didn't produce many matches for me so I dropped that one.

    In the end though, I'm currently in a relationship with an amazing man who I didn't meet online. Met him the good old fashioned way, through a friend.

    Good luck out there! :)
  • Carissa145
    Carissa145 Posts: 604 Member
    I know this sounds crazy, but I found my SO on MFP, and neither of us were intending any sort of relationship. We just found after about 500 messages that we got along very well. But this may be rare :) good luck!
  • Clameater
    Clameater Posts: 317
    I know this sounds crazy, but I found my SO on MFP, and neither of us were intending any sort of relationship. We just found after about 500 messages that we got along very well. But this may be rare :) good luck!

    This... I've had similar experiences, except with a multitude of both men and women all at the same time and they know about each other

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