Why do people insist on giving (bad) advice?

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  • bunnybutler29
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    Going based on just the title of your post im gonna say "Opinions are like *kitten*, everybody has one". They feel as though what works for them should or probably works for everyone.
  • Chevy_Quest
    Chevy_Quest Posts: 2,012 Member
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    I Had to travel with a "family friend" who I hadn't see in a while and she was complaining about how hard it was to lose weight (She is easily 80 lbs overweight) . She said she was going to hit it every day with P90x!

    I said "Cool... go for it. By the way I have lost 20 lbs and it has taken me about 8 months to do it and I just log everything I eat and try to burn more calories than I take in). I told her I have proabably 20-30 lbs to go depending on my bodyfat and the first thing she said was "better do it safe; you don't want to get too skinny". WTF - When I get to my goal weight I will still weigh 30 lbs more than when I graduated high school (I had no LBM!)

    People are mostly clueless...

    I know I was clueless as recently as 8 months ago I actually took Raspberry Ketones - (WTF directed at myself in the mirror LOL):drinker:
  • Tropical_Turtle
    Tropical_Turtle Posts: 2,236 Member
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    With quacks like Dr Oz distributing information it really is no surprise this is happening. All I can say, is keep doing you, and forget everyone else.
  • ThePlight
    ThePlight Posts: 3,593 Member
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    With quacks like Dr Oz distributing information it really is no surprise this is happening. All I can say, is keep doing you, and forget everyone else.

    This.
    My boyfriend got me some freaking "Acai berry" pills, those things made my stomach hurt. I threw them in the garbage. I told him how I'm going to lose the weight myself by eating healthy, he's a believer in Dr Oz, I honestly don't care who this... Person is, trying to sell all this garbage to people that are trying to lose weight.
    I only tried it because I promised my boyfriend, but never again.
  • Ke22yB
    Ke22yB Posts: 969 Member
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    First sorry to say no matter how much weight you lose IT WILL never end people will always want to correct you
    Second a piece of advice Ignore all advice and if its it ain't broke don't fix it It works for you great job doing it and keep it up.
    I am in a fitness class and after I had lost almost 130 pounds a newer member asks are you losing weight ? He was not in the class previous years and didn't know me that well so I just said yes i have lost some weight he then proceeds to take 5 minutes telling me what I should be doing. A friend came over and heard this and was laughing so hard I thought he was about to pee down his leg. The guy puzzled asks what is so funny so friend says he has lost over 130 pounds so far I think he has got this one. He says OH and just walks away.
    But there will always be some guy giving me advice and I smile and nod and say thanks for that and promptly go about my business
  • lucystacy71
    lucystacy71 Posts: 290 Member
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    I could never understand why people are so ready to believe everything Dr Oz says.

    Maybe so many people are searching for that miracle cure for fat they're willing to believe anything?
  • darkangell0407
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    Congrats on your weightloss, my advice is keep doing what you are already doing and stop letting the good opinion of others or bad advice of others get you down, stress is not good for your body. Simply respond by saying; thank you all for your advice but what i am doing is working for me so I will continue to keep on keepin on, hope you all can find something that works for you as well, peace out!!!
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
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    I think they honestly just want to be helpful, but unfortunately most people get their dietary information from magazines and Dr. Oz.

    Pretty much this. My brother and father would constantly ask me "Why are you eating ice cream when you're trying to lose weight?" or "you shouldn't be weight lifting, you need to eat only salad and run!"

    My father saw me after like 6 months and now won't offer his suggestion. He admits that I might know what I'm dong and am doing it the healthy way so I got that going for me :)
  • dakotababy
    dakotababy Posts: 2,406 Member
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    I have worked with many people, and EVERYONE has the secret to weight loss. Whether it is no/low carbs, gluten free, blah blah blah. It is really hard to listen to, and I have to bite my tongue a lot of the time.

    Most case - these fads work because you are cutting calories. Going carb-free? Lower calories...eating nothing but soup? lower calories. It makes no difference what it is, if you cut your calories you will lose weight. Though, they may think the same about me.

    I have made this life-style change more personal, and I do not talk about it much with others. I just do what needs to get done so I dont need to argue with people about what works and what doesn't. Sometimes I like to think as if I have been doing the consistent exercise and healthIER eating my entire life - so I dont feel obligated to talk about it. I don't imagine in-shape skinny folks go around talking about why they are skinny, and I find this mentality helps keep my mouth shut! Plus I have all the wonderful people on MFP to talk with who are (for the most part) educated (to some degree).
  • Jkn922
    Jkn922 Posts: 74
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    I find that the people who are willing to give the advice and shove information down your throat are the ones who think they know everything but do nothing themselves, it's one of those things that make themselves feel better but it's a false sense of security as they think they know what they are talking about. Keep going regardless, I also don't inform people of my weight loss journey as I get people throwing 'opinions' to me too.
  • kellyskitties
    kellyskitties Posts: 475 Member
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    This is the reason I keep my plan and progress private at work/social areas. I don't point out what I can and cannot have (which is limited by my calorie limit and protein minimum at this time). I just fix a plate and eat. When others know then what you choose or don't choose starts to be open for public debate. It's not. It's my decisions, even when I make bad decisions to go over my calories. It's all about me.

    It did come up one day when someone noticed the weight loss. Another coworker immediately started talking about how she can't give anything up. I told her right now, I haven't. It's just a different balance. She just glazed over and made a list of the things she can't give up - one being candy, as I was eating a piece of candy from her desk candy bowl. LOL.

    I think people are just looking for A) a way to be helpful B) don't want to see you doing it a "hard" way cause then it must be hard or C) Don't want to think that their idea can't be right for everyone.

    I don't diss anyone doing any diet unless it's dangerous. If low carb/low sugar/low fat/no meat/organic and so forth works for you then great. If it doesn't - then you need to make some changes. If mine is working - leave it alone. When it stops, I'll consider some tweaks.

    OP: If what you are doing works - keep on keeping on. Lead by example. That's my plan.
  • annakow
    annakow Posts: 385 Member
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    That's why I am not adding people as friends ..pointless.. after 100 lbs lost I don't need their little advices and daily drama...Another thing is when people ask you @how on earth you lost so much?@..and the moment they hear about eating less, they are insulted...it's crazy.
  • annakow
    annakow Posts: 385 Member
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    this is so true!
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
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    This is the reason I keep my plan and progress private at work/social areas.

    I don't diss anyone doing any diet unless it's dangerous. If low carb/low sugar/low fat/no meat/organic and so forth works for you then great. If it doesn't - then you need to make some changes. If mine is working - leave it alone. When it stops, I'll consider some tweaks.

    OP: If what you are doing works - keep on keeping on. Lead by example. That's my plan.
    Pretty much this.
  • TribeHokie
    TribeHokie Posts: 711 Member
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    This is one of the reasons I don't talk to people about it.

    Also, at the risk of sounding rude (not my intention), since this hasn't been pointed out yet: OP, you are kind of asking for people to comment and give advice if you're posting about it on facebook. Don't put it out there in the first place and people won't have the chance to comment. They might even be trying to get a rise out of you because they think you're bragging.
  • AmyZ46
    AmyZ46 Posts: 694 Member
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    Congrats on your 50 lbs !! Awesome work .

    I too think people want to be helpful . I have only had one person tell me( when I was in a plateau) , that I needed to eat less than 1,000 calories a day to break the plateau. I just politely thanked him for his advice and changed my exercises and increased my intensity and bam it started falling off again. He asked me about three weeks later if I had taken his advice and broken through-I said no and explained what I did while continuing to eat like I normally do ( 1,200 to 1,600 cals a day) He was shocked that I started losing again he said he always thought you had to eat less than a 1,000 calories a day to lose weight.


    I do talk about my diet and weight loss all the time . I can't help it I'm obsessed in a good way . I get bad advice all the time lol I just ignore it or say well if My way stops working maybe I'll try your way ?
  • Mr_Knight
    Mr_Knight Posts: 9,532 Member
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    So, why then, does everyone who sees or hears that I have lost weight insist on giving me advice?

    Because we're social creatures, and biologically programmed to stick our nose in other people's business. As should be evident by the fact that we're all posting to a bunch of strangers on an internet chat board. :)

    Gotta just let it all roll off your back, like water off of a duck.
  • ckspores1018
    ckspores1018 Posts: 168 Member
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    If I post on facebook that I have lost weight a bunch of people ask how and when I say that I just count calories a bunch of other people chime in to inform me that I should be cutting carbs.

    congrats on your loss!

    Other than what everyone has said, if you don't want unsolicited advice on Facebook, don't humblebrag on Facebook. It is the nature of the beast, to some extent.
  • GardeningZombie
    GardeningZombie Posts: 55 Member
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    50 lbs of weight loss is great... But you really should reduce your protein intake. After all, the human body is 70% water, so I get 70% of my calories from liquids... Coke, olive oil, milkshakes, and pork chop smoothies


    :drinker: :bigsmile:
  • elsdonward
    elsdonward Posts: 81 Member
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    Well let me just say this. In my country we used to go around and if we needed to know anything we just asked people for advice.

    Then somewhere between the seventies and the eighties some bright sparks appeared who started saying that giving advice was wrong. In fact in the end people were victimised for giving the wrong advice. You would think that this was good - but no it was not. Companies were hounded out and prosecuted for giving the wrong advice they said.
    Then people appeared who said that you could not acll a ballcock a ballcock. So what was good for our parents, who brought us into the world and stood up and fought in the war - was not good enough for these people. No - they had to change the world by pointing their fingers at the least thing and declaring it wrong. Meanwhile we went form a first class power to a nobody - our toilets are stinking or non existent. Councils are allowed to turf sick people out of their homes and our pensions are not worth the money that they were printed on. It is simply a total lack of social responsibility where we disrespect our elders. You would not like to live in our country.

    So I say listen to all the advice that you can - some of the advice is sound because it opens our eyes to all of the crappy things that are going on - all of the shilly things they are putting into our food because there is no monitoring going on anymore.

    We are descending into the slough of despond and we can only save ourselves and our loved ones - and the first thing to do is to start caring for people. People are just lost in the absence of good advice and shackled to a silent government with no strength or leadership to guide us with our nutrition and how to preserve our health. So they believe that they are right but in most cases they just do not know what real food is anymore and just eat the junk that is peddled.