In need of advice: Stuck between 2 guys? Help...

124»

Replies

  • BogQueen1
    BogQueen1 Posts: 320 Member
    Just a thought and I'm surprised no one has said this, but if 22 year old 'friend' has told you that if there is another guy then he's moving on, then 'friend' is not what he considers you. He wants to date you. So no, he's not your 'best friend'. He's a guy who's interested in you. And also, if he wouldn't talk to you anymore if you were seeing someone else, HE'S NOT YOUR FRIEND, a friend wouldn't care.

    So to string him along by not telling him about the other man under the guise that you are 'just friends' is really unfair to him.

    Pick one, pick the other, pick neither. I can't tell you which to chose, but make a choice!
  • zombiesama
    zombiesama Posts: 755 Member
    You should tell the 22 year old, so he can get on with his life.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    Just a thought and I'm surprised no one has said this, but if 22 year old 'friend' has told you that if there is another guy then he's moving on, then 'friend' is not what he considers you. He wants to date you. So no, he's not your 'best friend'. He's a guy who's interested in you. And also, if he wouldn't talk to you anymore if you were seeing someone else, HE'S NOT YOUR FRIEND, a friend wouldn't care.

    So to string him along by not telling him about the other man under the guise that you are 'just friends' is really unfair to him.

    Pick one, pick the other, pick neither. I can't tell you which to chose, but make a choice!

    I totally said that.

    I don't think she's really stringing him along -- she's telling him explicitly they are friends. He's totally free to go date anyone he chooses. How long he chooses to wait around isn't on her. But anyway, I think the whole "I wouldn't talk to you if you have a boyfriend" thing screams "super creep".
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    You should tell the 22 year old, so he can get on with his life.

    She has made it clear to him she just wants a friendship... so he is totally free to play on without any further info from her.
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    Dishonest. And keeping your big toe stuck in the door of two guys is just creepy. Sounds like you don't deserve them! Back to the drawing board on your character.
    Really? She's only 19 and has only been dating her "boyfriend" one month. This is not even really a thing. It seems reasonable to tell her "boyfriend" that she wants to be clear that they don't have exclusivity, which of course means she needs to accept him dating other people too, and then she is free to tell her "best friend" that she is interested in dating him in addition to the marine corps guy.

    You're a grown-up now, dear. You have to learn to use your words. If you can't talk to them about stuff like this, in no way are you prepared to be in an intimate, much less committed, relationship.

    word.

    OP you're 19 and if you dont want to be exclusive now there's nothing wrong with that. be honest with yourself and the others. maybe these guys will be OK with that maybe they won't but it starts first with being honest and communicating.

    play on, playette!

Categories