Single Ladies! What's Your Number?

I'm not single but, my husband included (who I met when I was 23), it was 32 or 33. And that's none of his G.D. business. My partner knows I've been with more men then he has women (I to, had a spree when I moved out, racked up quite a few guys in between ages 20-21), but it's pretty rude to just come out and ask. That's completely private. this guy sounds like a tool, and judgmental to boot, to 'freak out' about your number, be it too high or too low. Ugh. the only number that would have ever freaked me out was 0- I was never interested in sleeping with a virgin, the few I met with either loaded with some sort of erectile dysfunction, commitment issues or were majorly religious- all of which are massive turn-offs.

I'm 30 years old, have not had any long term relationships (5 months was the longest), but I have dated a lot. I recently started talking to a guy and he asked "my number" (aka number of guys I've had sex with). I've told my number to guys before and most don't see a problem with it. This guy has kind of freaked out on me and it got me to wondering what the number is of other single women my age. So ladies, if you've never been married or had any real long relationships, what's your number?

I live by this motto: "Gentleman never ask and Ladies never tell." Saves a lot of drama.

These three opinions are right on target here pretty much sum it up:

wow, that is something else. My husband and I never discussed that. We had both been married previously; I was 32 and he was 44, so I'm sure neither of us assumed the other was a virgin, but . . . . sheesh.

I wouldn't care what your number was before me as long as that number stays 1 while she's with me.

I live by this motto: "Gentleman never ask and Ladies never tell." Saves a lot of drama.

After all as long as we're not talking in the hundreds (for health concerns) who cares?

I wouldn't care what your number was before me as long as that number stays 1 while she's with me.

I agree, and awesome way to put it.

Compared to you all, I'm a "slut", mind you 80% of my partners were from when I was 16-18, but even my number from the last 5 years makes me seem loose (which I'm not). I calmed down once I turned 18 (I was a very lucky gal on all fronts), but my sexual views are much different from a lot of people. I am open to sharing, yet am a loyal person.

I agree with the "Gentleman never ask and Ladies never tell." comment, but I give a full discloser when I first start seeing someone, so they end up knowing my number anyways. In return I don't really care what their number is if they accept mine (even if they don't accept mine, I don't judge).

*sneaks out of thread*

I don't see what the issue is and I have always hated that question. I am married and prior to being married we chose not to discuss it. The past is the past and nothing is going to change it. If you are the type of person that would make you not date or dump someone because of their number- then don't ask.

"to me it comes down to how close your numbers are. if they are both two no prob, if they are both 20, no problem. but if a guy had 25 sexual encounters and a girl had one or two, then i would imagine if may be awkward. i am obviously no expert though. just what i have observed. good post. "

I am at 10 now. I am not single at the moment either.

My current boyfriend is at 2 including me. I think that is a pretty big gap, but we get along fine.

4 guys, and 2 of them sucked so bad I'm disappointed to have to count them.

And I would never tell. It's not his business

Let's just say that I'm past the fingers but not all of my toes. .

^^This

I don't think it should matter how many people you have slept with. It is none of their business and if they ask that question, then I think they have issues to deal with. I couldn't tell you the number of people I have had relations with and I don't keep count. There is no need to have a tally. It is quality that counts. The actual relationship.

I personally don't want to know what my partner has been up to before me. It causes all sorts of insecurities so why waste time thinking about it. They are with you now for a reason.

Never feel ashamed of your life, number of partners or not.

bump. this is interesting. i have been with the same guy since middle school and my number is 0. we just are waiting to get married. if we were not together, for whatever reason, i would also want a virgin husband. to me it comes down to how close your numbers are. if they are both two no prob, if they are both 20, no problem. but if a guy had 25 sexual encounters and a girl had one or two, then i would imagine if may be awkward. i am obviously no expert though. just what i have observed. good post.

The last guy I dated was my 2nd, and he'd probably been with 50+, and that's just me guessing, he has no idea. Personally, for me it was never a problem, I appreciated his experience and he appreciated my lack thereof (cheating seems to be the norm around here). I would never want to date someone who didn't at least have some idea of what they're doing even though I choose not to sleep with anyone I'm not seriously dating.

Im 21 and ive been with 2 guys

another guy perspective

don't ask, don't tell.
never been one to ask, past is the past, point of relationships is to work on the future, as long as I know she doesn't have a history of slutting around im cool

If the past truly is the past, why would even that matter?

We are not who we were a year+ ago - we are who we are in the present moment.

Sometimes men and women's ant to know they aren't dating a raging slut or someone with a STD...

If the past truly is the past, why would even that matter?

We are not who we were a year+ ago - we are who we are in the present moment.

when I say don't ask don't tell I mean use common sense hahaha, yeah sure were all gonna have some history but id rather not know PROVIDED it wasn't public knowledge that so and so got around ALOT

and I know what your saying about not being the same person as you were a year or so ago but personally I wouldn't take that chance, just me

Dude, you're 18. Get all the chicks you're age. Usually they don't get big numbers until their 20's so you should be good to go