I just have to accept that I will always be fat

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  • marigold77
    marigold77 Posts: 11
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    You are beautiful regardless... so stop stressing out! You have to be happy with yourself first, accepting your body for what it is, is a good thing. Just take the pressure off, stress is the worst.

    When you're ready, start with small changes like: going to the gym or doing something active everyday. Then, migrate to small changes in your diet... maybe a healthy breakfast, three square meals a day, conscious eating (the first bite is always the most delicious, after the third, you probably don't need it anymore), etc.

    One step at time... and when you're ready, you'll do what need to do to be the way you wish to be. Good luck, and enjoy each moment.
  • JewelsinBigD
    JewelsinBigD Posts: 661 Member
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    I just started 5:2 as well since I love to eat and eating at a deficit for almost 2 years so far has been working but REALLY slowly and I needed something to help me gain some momentum and therefore gain more resolve. It was REALLY hard- but I ate healthy-coffee and some almonds, turkey meatballs, sautéed spinach, and right before bed 2 cheese cubes. It was hard but in the end I felt great this morning and all day today when I am back to my calorie deficit. I feel like I can eat anything on my measly 1450. It helped me to reset my body. After the holidays when we gorge ourselves and we forget what we really need to eat - and it is a lot less than we want!
  • stephaaniemarie
    stephaaniemarie Posts: 28 Member
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    I have tried so many diets, I dont have the discipline, I LOVE food that is bad for me, it makes me feel full in a different way to anything else.

    I will just always be fat, there is no other option for me.

    I have been trying this 5:2 diet, I got so hungry and found a galaxy bar and ate it at about 4pm

    I've also had a bowl of granola and a yogurt and a banana today.

    well over my 500 calories, so I have basically been hungry all day for no reason what so ever.

    I give up, this is the end of my weight loss journey because I am just not good enough and I never ever will be.

    Off to throw away my 'skinny' clothes.

    If you're looking for motivation, your negative attitude doesn't convey that. If this 5:2 'diet' isn't working for you, why not eat a little less every day so you still have a caloric deficit, but aren't starving at beating yourself up two days a week?
  • MYhealthyjourney70
    MYhealthyjourney70 Posts: 276 Member
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    do not give up and get rid of the word diet!! this is a lifestyle change. i've had lots of ups and downs and i just keep trying to change my ways which is hard. hold habits die hard. you can do this.
  • Dit250
    Dit250 Posts: 1 Member
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    I've been there. I promise I have. You do NOT have to accept being a way that makes you unhappy. Half of this is in your head. I LOVE food, and i've always been a comfort eater. I can't do it without true accountability. Putting myself out there for others to see. If you wanna chat, I'm at FB.com/danielle.nickerson.54. I'm no expert and I've still got a long way to go, but I like connect with other ladies on this type of journey.
  • NikiChicken
    NikiChicken Posts: 576 Member
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    Why are you making it so complicated? Find out your TDEE and eat less than that. Stop trying to rush weight loss and it will happen, I promise. I've lost over 90lbs eating whatever I wanted. You don't need to restrict and you don't need to starve.

    This, exactly!

    I've lost over 70 pounds and I always eat what I want! I might delay something a day or two until I can fit it into my plan, but I never deny myself completely! i *love* food. LOVE it. I'm not willing to do anything to lose weight that I'm not willing to do for the rest of my life, so instead, I practice eating sensibly and am patient! Weight loss doesn't happen in a day, a week, or even a month. It's what you do day in and day out for the rest of your life!
  • jacquib234
    jacquib234 Posts: 17 Member
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    I'm like you, tried eating healthy (and denying myself Chocolate, Biscuits, Cake etc.) and a couple of the well known Diet Clubs. To me it's all very well going on a diet but you've got to get off it once you reach your goal - more people can lose the weight than can successfully get off the diet - at least that's my experience.

    I'm not trying to lose weight I'm trying to be always honest about what I eat and get it under control - that's it. No huge amount of weight to lose, no huge immediate changes to make. I'm trying to create a new normal way of living for myself. (Oh and stop making excuses to myself over what I'm eating and why) I have lost some, if I lose any more then great, if not, who cares?

    I see this as being on a journey that is a Marathon, not a Sprint. I'm human I'm GOING to have off days, but it's becoming bad days that don't become bad weeks, months etc.

    If you want to be happy and not worry about your weight, then you know what? Do it, the only person on this whole planet that matters what they think of you is, you guessed it, you!
  • mandiebass
    mandiebass Posts: 2
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    Being new to this game, what is TDEE????? im doing calorie control and the 5-2. geting on fine. Aldi rivita subsitue and laughing cow my friends! nibble all day as I'm a grazer, and find struggling to make the 1200 im supposed to have as making better choices in the food i enjoy.

    Dont get me wrong, love a kebab, and a vodka at the weekend, and dont beat myself up, the diet diary helps me make better choices thats all, so slowly slowly catch a monkey is my motto.

    Dont listen to anyone, do what suits you, cut out the treats you KNOW are bad for u and the rewards will follow ....... trust. It's about you and no-one else.

    M :)
  • jlheathfam
    jlheathfam Posts: 1 Member
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    If 500 calories per day is your goal, your body metabolism will completely shut off. Even if you managed to eat that little, you wouldn't lose weight like you might think. Use the goals here on mfp, set to lose at most a couple of pounds a week. Eating less than 1200 calories (approx) is what will shut off your metabolism. Track what you eat, see what logs as high calorie, and substitute a little at a time. Something healthier, filling, less calories. Even if you're not below calories at first, making permanent, healthy changes a few at a time will get you there. I found I can burn through hundreds of calories snacking on chips. Now I snack on some lean proteins, some fiber etc. I still eat ice cream, just not as much and lower calorie stuff. No Diet! Like someone else said, move a little more, eat a little healthier. You'll get there! It's a lifelong process.
  • diannethegeek
    diannethegeek Posts: 14,776 Member
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    Being new to this game, what is TDEE????? im doing calorie control and the 5-2. geting on fine. Aldi rivita subsitue and laughing cow my friends! nibble all day as I'm a grazer, and find struggling to make the 1200 im supposed to have as making better choices in the food i enjoy.

    Dont get me wrong, love a kebab, and a vodka at the weekend, and dont beat myself up, the diet diary helps me make better choices thats all, so slowly slowly catch a monkey is my motto.

    Dont listen to anyone, do what suits you, cut out the treats you KNOW are bad for u and the rewards will follow ....... trust. It's about you and no-one else.

    M :)

    TDEE stands for Total Daily Energy Expenditure. It's the number of calories your body burns in a day and also the number of calories you would need to eat to maintain your current weight. There are a lot of calculators online to get an estimate of yours, and several have been linked in this thread if you're interested.

    With the 5:2 diet a dieter should be eating their TDEE 5 days a week and a reduced calorie goal 2 days a week (usually 500-600 calories for 2 non-consecutive days). It works for a lot of people, but if the OP is as miserable as she seems on it then it may not be working for her.
  • alexandriax03
    alexandriax03 Posts: 289 Member
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    Well after finding out that a tiny wee bit of choccy is 300 calories I won't be eating it again .

    Thanks for the TDEE thing that's interesting but I didn't really get what I was supposed to be eating.

    I think I just want to try being happy and see if that makes me lose weight

    you can actually have a lot of chocolate for 300 calories, that's the usual amount in a candy bar like a twix. make that fit in your daily macros by making lower-calorie choices somewhere else, or you could start daily exercise to have some leeway for a treat when you want it. if you don't want to exercise or watch calories somewhere else, then just eat half the candy bar today, and half tomorrow,

    seems like you may have a binge eating issue. 5:2 is NOT the diet for "comfort eaters" and what you have described about the different fullness you feel from "bad" food makes me think that this is tied to emotional eating. you have to be very, very controlled and disciplined on 5:2 - i couldn't do it.

    everything in moderation. and YES you are on to something when you said you want to work on being happy - emotional eating, binge eating are all tied to your mental health

    I agree. I think you are a binge eater as well and would benefit from a therapist who specializes in eating disorders. If you care about your health and well-being, you will make the time to meet with a therapist.

    5:2 is definitely not for you. Forget about the diets. Diets don't work. Just eat in moderation like the above user stated.

    You said you don't know what to eat… here's an option:

    Breakfast:

    2 hard boiled eggs (140 calories)
    1/2 whole grain bagel (around 125 calories)
    1 tbsp. natural PB (90-95 calories)

    Mid morning snack:

    Blue diamond 100 calorie pack of almonds (100 calories)
    1 medium apple (80 calories) (Apples have a lot of fiber)

    Lunch:

    3-4 oz. lean meat (approx. 120 calories)
    1 cup brown rice (150 calories)
    As many veggies as you'd like (FREE) (Veggies have a lot of fiber which will help keep you full)

    Mid afternoon snack:

    Greek yogurt with berries (150-200 calories depending on brand, etc.) (Berries are low glycemic… less sugar)

    Dinner:

    3-4 oz. lean meat (approx. 120 calories)
    1 small-medium sweet potato (150 calories) (The size of your fist)
    As many veggies as you'd like (FREE)

    Night time snack:

    Reduced fat cheese stick (60 calories)
    3 or 4 whole grain crackers (between 60-80 calories… not 100% sure though)
    1/2 cup grapes (50 calories)
  • Qskim
    Qskim Posts: 1,145 Member
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    My doctor doesn't give a ****, I have sat and begged them to help me and they have just ignored it time and time again.

    Easy solution: find a new doctor. Particularly who you can build a relationship with and who will support you throughout your journey. You'll know this is "the doctor" when you meet him or her.

    They've possibly ignored it because if you did have an underlying issue with weight loss then your ticker would not show what it does show.

    Don't assume either that those who have successfully lost weight haven't struggled at some point with frustration. The motivation and inclination is not always steady. There are times of falling over but they succeed because they re evaluate, learn, re group and restart and above all are patient.
  • liltxgrl4e
    liltxgrl4e Posts: 5 Member
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    Not being a failure is my new priority

    Don't let your hard work go to waste! Forget dieting and just eat healthy. Healthy food can be delicious too! You have to look inside yourself a find what you want the most...a few simple changes can make all the difference along with a little exercise. Take it one day at a time.
  • MsMacL
    MsMacL Posts: 75 Member
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    Don't give up. You are far to young to do that. Get to a healthy weight and enjoy life. Just take it slowly.:smile:
  • bobbijodmb
    bobbijodmb Posts: 463 Member
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    Feel free to add me. There isn't a quick solution to getting skinny-- its about making small changes over time and not feeling deprived =)

    you can do this!
  • Dragonwolf
    Dragonwolf Posts: 5,600 Member
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    Okay well I have eaten a jacket potato... With beans and cheese on

    Not loads of cheese

    I feel a lot better (and warmer)

    I have made some positive changes in the last few weeks, we've reduced red meat down to once a week, opting for veggies and fish most nights and chicken and veggies the others

    It's the comfort eating that I need to stop, getting munchies in the evenings Etc

    I've also stopped eating wheat, not because of weightloss necessarily but because it's bad for me and gives me the runs and indigestion and wind.

    I've also started having diet drinks instead of anything full fat

    Even with the stuff I have eaten tonight, I've not gone over my 2350 calories needed to lose weight according to the scooby people

    So I think I am going to tell myself that I have changed sonething rather than failed something.

    Don't fall for the low-fat garbage. If you artificially take the fat out of something, you have to add something else to make it more palatable. Often, that's salt or loads of sugar, sometimes artificial stuff that, at best, doesn't benefit you, and at worst causes more harm than the fat it replaced.

    Yes, fat has more calories, but guess what? It's more satiating. Whole, naturally fatty foods (fatty cuts of meat, whole milk, etc) are also packed with nutrients that you can only absorb when you have enough fat in your diet. Believe it or not, you should have at least .45g/lb of bodyweight of fats in your diet. If you don't, you run the risk of not being able to absorb certain nutrients (Vitamins A, D, E, and K, specifically, and without those, some other nutrients can't be absorbed as well - ie vitamin D aids in calcium absorption).

    The same goes for red meat. The supposed links between red meat and disease are typically poorly done studies (most of which don't seem to know the difference between a heavily processed, factory farmed hotdog packed with additives, and a high-quality steak from a cow that was pasture-raised). The L-carnitine link is sketchy, at best, as well, given the mixed results it gives (and the fact that it, too, plays a vital role in the human body). A good quality red meat is your friend, not your enemy.

    You don't have to feel starved, even just doing calorie counting. If you're struggling to stay within your calorie goals, then consider tweaking the foods you eat. I found that increasing my fat and decreasing my carbs helps me stay within my calorie goals (conversely, if you're eating at least the recommended amount of fats, but having trouble getting up to your calorie allotment, then consider reducing fats and increasing carbs).
  • mandiebass
    mandiebass Posts: 2
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    Thanks!!

    I've only been doing this for 2 weeks and have lot 9 pound. Fluke maybe, but determined I;m going to get slimmer, (not skinny). Just want to feel better, this is my mission, no-one elses, so only myself to answer too!! Whats OP??? (sorry .... blonde! lol!!)
  • diannethegeek
    diannethegeek Posts: 14,776 Member
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    Thanks!!

    I've only been doing this for 2 weeks and have lot 9 pound. Fluke maybe, but determined I;m going to get slimmer, (not skinny). Just want to feel better, this is my mission, no-one elses, so only myself to answer too!! Whats OP??? (sorry .... blonde! lol!!)

    OP stands for Original Post or Original Poster (depending on context) - it's either the first post in a thread or the person who started it.
  • mtrautwe
    mtrautwe Posts: 4 Member
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    "I have made some positive changes in the last few weeks, we've reduced red meat down to once a week, opting for veggies and fish most nights and chicken and veggies the others

    It's the comfort eating that I need to stop, getting munchies in the evenings Etc "

    Good call! I struggled with night noshing too. One tip is to add a bit of fat to your evening meal which will help you feel full longer. So add olive oil to your salad or roasted veggies or half an avocado. Roasted vegetables have really helped me. Fat and fiber combo is a great hunger killer. Roasted brussel sprouts, cauliflower, squash are all wonderful with just olive oil, salt and pepper.

    Also - and this should be easy in the UK; a hot cup of tea. No sweeteneer but cream is ok. Obviously decaf. I find that the hot tea sort of "closes" my tastebuds. So, eat enough fat at dinner and have a cup of tea about 30 minutes before bed.
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
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    Why are you making it so complicated? Find out your TDEE and eat less than that. Stop trying to rush weight loss and it will happen, I promise. I've lost over 90lbs eating whatever I wanted. You don't need to restrict and you don't need to starve.

    This. I love love food, and I've managed to lose 74 lbs so far (for good, I hope). Believe me, if I can do it, so can you. It's not easy, some days I just want to eat everything I want, but you can do it.

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