What they don't tell you about losing weight

ProgressNotPerfection32
ProgressNotPerfection32 Posts: 1,155 Member
in Motivation and Support
I thought since there are so many new members around, I would start this. I have seen similar threads before, and it's always nice to know you aren't alone in this.


Things they don't tell you:

1) even when you get close to your goal weight, you will probably still feel like your old, overweight self a lot of the time.
2) this is so much harder emotionally than you ever could imagine.
3) you will want to quit. You will want to give up. There will be days, weeks, or even months where you question everything you are doing.
4) you will get a lot of unwanted/unsolicited advice from those you work with and those you love. Take it all with a grain of salt.
5) it won't happen overnight. It won't happen in a week. It takes time, patience, and determination.
6) even when you get to your goal, your body probably won't look the same as it did when you were at that weight 10-20 years ago. Gravity and time are not your friend and it takes awhile to accept your new, healthy body for what it is.
7) you feel more unsure and insecure in the new body than in the old. Possibly because of attention you didn't receive before or your body doesn't look the way you hoped it would.
8) REWARD yourself for little non-scale victories and small losses. Do not reward yourself with food.
9) it takes WORK. lots and lots of work.


My favorite quote: Don't give up what you want MOST for what you want RIGHT NOW.

It's taken me 3 years to get where I'm at and I'm no where near where I want to be. It takes a lot of soul searching to be on this journey.
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Replies

  • Guamybear
    Guamybear Posts: 1,061 Member
    I love #6.. gravity is NOT my friend nor do I want to be as thin as I was.. My goal weight is actually about 20lbs higher..it was the weight I was when I first considered myself getting fat.. ahhh..to be that fat, again..
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
    ProgressNotPerfection32 Posts: 1,155 Member
    I love #6.. gravity is NOT my friend nor do I want to be as thin as I was.. My goal weight is actually about 20lbs higher..it was the weight I was when I first considered myself getting fat.. ahhh..to be that fat, again..

    lol!!! I look at myself now and think I thought I was fat back then! Crap I would give anything for this to have been my highest weight!!!!
  • Fit_little_vegan
    Fit_little_vegan Posts: 36
    1st off I love your screen name
    And deffinatly agree! With alllll of it <3
  • Lmsciera22
    Lmsciera22 Posts: 15
    I love the quote! Thanks for sharing!
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
    ProgressNotPerfection32 Posts: 1,155 Member
    :smile: thanks.
  • looneytunes32
    looneytunes32 Posts: 108 Member
    Needed to see this today, thanks!!
  • brooookeexo
    brooookeexo Posts: 51 Member
    That is one of my favorite quotes that i always try to keep in mind! Thanks for sharing!
  • sarahmichel101
    sarahmichel101 Posts: 158 Member
    Girl, I have the time! And thank you so much for sharing. My mom always says to me it is a short term struggle for a long term gain. At 23 if I take 5 years to get healthy (as well as learn how to be healthy sustainability), I get to benefit from it for the next what.....50 years? Seems short in the scheme of things.
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
    ProgressNotPerfection32 Posts: 1,155 Member
    Needed to see this today, thanks!!

    You are most welcome!! Little reminders are nice once in a while ????
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
    ProgressNotPerfection32 Posts: 1,155 Member
    That is one of my favorite quotes that i always try to keep in mind! Thanks for sharing!

    It's my wallpaper on my phone. It's amazing how true it really is and how easily we forget it. We are so trained to expect instant gratification that when we don't get it, we really overreact.
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
    ProgressNotPerfection32 Posts: 1,155 Member
    Girl, I have the time! And thank you so much for sharing. My mom always says to me it is a short term struggle for a long term gain. At 23 if I take 5 years to get healthy (as well as learn how to be healthy sustainability), I get to benefit from it for the next what.....50 years? Seems short in the scheme of things.

    You have a wise mom! You are right on target, too. If I would've stuck with it at your age, I wouldn't be where I'm at right now. I let life be an excuse and get in the way. I've sure missed out on a lot in those 11 years.
  • srobertking
    srobertking Posts: 74 Member
    I love this post! Great job! You've come a long way :)
  • ronrstaats
    ronrstaats Posts: 294 Member
    Excellent post... 10/10

    I have been at my goal for 1.5 years now after taking 13 months to get to it.

    #1 was by far the hardest for me. It wasn't until this month I realized I had stopped thinking of myself as still fat even though I was 190 pounds.
  • sndy_xo
    sndy_xo Posts: 7
    Great post! Very motivational
  • sarahmichel101
    sarahmichel101 Posts: 158 Member
    Girl, I have the time! And thank you so much for sharing. My mom always says to me it is a short term struggle for a long term gain. At 23 if I take 5 years to get healthy (as well as learn how to be healthy sustainability), I get to benefit from it for the next what.....50 years? Seems short in the scheme of things.

    You have a wise mom! You are right on target, too. If I would've stuck with it at your age, I wouldn't be where I'm at right now. I let life be an excuse and get in the way. I've sure missed out on a lot in those 11 years.
    I have let SCHOOL get in the way! In 7 months I start back to my next and final degree. I want to learn how to live a healthy life before that craziness starts.
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
    ProgressNotPerfection32 Posts: 1,155 Member
    I love this post! Great job! You've come a long way :)


    Thank you......... I was feeling very crappy today and it lead to some great thoughts to ponder.
  • nicoleisback
    nicoleisback Posts: 184
    I totally agree with number 1. I am a long way off my goal (well, half way towards my first goal) and still sometimes look at myself and see me exactly as I was 5 months ago. When I was feeling like this a few weeks ago I took a photo of myself and compared it to one I took when I started getting healthy and couldn't believe the difference.

    Thanks for the extra motivation :)
  • MichaelVRenner
    MichaelVRenner Posts: 92 Member
    Spot on, OP.
  • csk0018
    csk0018 Posts: 219 Member
    #1, #2 and #4... I'm relieved to know I'm not alone! Great post! :flowerforyou:
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
    ProgressNotPerfection32 Posts: 1,155 Member
    Excellent post... 10/10

    I have been at my goal for 1.5 years now after taking 13 months to get to it.

    #1 was by far the hardest for me. It wasn't until this month I realized I had stopped thinking of myself as still fat even though I was 190 pounds.


    Congrats!!! You look great!!

    It seems to take everyone a very long time to accept the new image. I've slowly been losing for 3 years with lots of stumbling along the way and some days I feel hot and skinny, but most days I feel frumpy, fat, and ugly still. Weird how our mind changes so slowly.
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
    ProgressNotPerfection32 Posts: 1,155 Member
    Girl, I have the time! And thank you so much for sharing. My mom always says to me it is a short term struggle for a long term gain. At 23 if I take 5 years to get healthy (as well as learn how to be healthy sustainability), I get to benefit from it for the next what.....50 years? Seems short in the scheme of things.

    You have a wise mom! You are right on target, too. If I would've stuck with it at your age, I wouldn't be where I'm at right now. I let life be an excuse and get in the way. I've sure missed out on a lot in those 11 years.
    I have let SCHOOL get in the way! In 7 months I start back to my next and final degree. I want to learn how to live a healthy life before that craziness starts.

    It's always something. School, marriage, job, kids, etc. for me it was all of the above. It took going through a very abusive marriage, 2 babies, struggling to make it with them on my own, and finally finding a man who loved ME for me. I was at my heaviest weight when we met and got married. We have been married 3 years and I finally figured it all out. For some people happy makes them gain. For me, it was finally being happy, stable, and content that led me to want to change.
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
    ProgressNotPerfection32 Posts: 1,155 Member
    I totally agree with number 1. I am a long way off my goal (well, half way towards my first goal) and still sometimes look at myself and see me exactly as I was 5 months ago. When I was feeling like this a few weeks ago I took a photo of myself and compared it to one I took when I started getting healthy and couldn't believe the difference.

    Thanks for the extra motivation :)

    Comparison pics are what keep me going. When I get down on it I take a pic and do some comparing. It's amazing. :-) you will get there.
  • Miza_amh
    Miza_amh Posts: 9
    wow nicely put
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
    ProgressNotPerfection32 Posts: 1,155 Member
    #1, #2 and #4... I'm relieved to know I'm not alone! Great post! :flowerforyou:

    Yea the emotional side is one I didn't expect. It's probably the toughest. Hang in there!!
  • ronrstaats
    ronrstaats Posts: 294 Member
    And you forgot

    #10 - The money you have to spend on new clothes... LOL
  • katznkt
    katznkt Posts: 320 Member
    Why is it that the more I lose, the more I struggle with the process emotionally?

    Ugh. Not necessarily in a bad way, just... I have to work through things more than I did 40 lbs ago when I felt nothing but a dash of happy when I lost a lb.
  • sarahmichel101
    sarahmichel101 Posts: 158 Member
    And you forgot

    #10 - The money you have to spend on new clothes... LOL
    People don't know about this? Hell, it's all I have been looking forward to!
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
    ProgressNotPerfection32 Posts: 1,155 Member
    And you forgot

    #10 - The money you have to spend on new clothes... LOL


    Crap!! I knew I would forget something!!!

    #10) you WILL need a 2nd job to pay for the following (if you have quite a bit to lose)
    1- new clothes (i advise goodwill, great finds there and you won't be in them long!) I've gone from a tight 18w to a current tight 10!!!
    2- resizing your wedding ring. I have done it 3 times! Gone from a 10 down to a 7. Needs to be sized again but waiting til I hit my goal.
    3- new shoes and socks. YEA your feet WILL SHRINK.
    4- for you ladies- new bras about every 25 lbs. :grumble:
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
    ProgressNotPerfection32 Posts: 1,155 Member
    Why is it that the more I lose, the more I struggle with the process emotionally?

    Ugh. Not necessarily in a bad way, just... I have to work through things more than I did 40 lbs ago when I felt nothing but a dash of happy when I lost a lb.


    Yep. At 75 lbs lost I'm more insecure and unsure of myself. Feel less confident and sexy. Always questioning the right food changes or choices. It SUCKS.
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
    ProgressNotPerfection32 Posts: 1,155 Member
    And #11) don't forget to change things up when you get bored. Nothing is set in stone. I've changed my "plan" more than I've changed my hair color.

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