Needing a man's perspective...

tlcarolinagirl
tlcarolinagirl Posts: 1,700 Member
in Chit-Chat
Do you have a problem with your woman making more money than you? Yes, this is a serious question. I know men who have major "power" issues with their woman making more money than they do. They don't mind spending it, but it's clear they feel threatened by it when they bring it up often. What do you think?
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Replies

  • AZ_Gato
    AZ_Gato Posts: 1,270 Member
    No, as long as she knows her place.


    not srs
  • 212019156
    212019156 Posts: 341 Member
    No problem with it unless the women makes the guy feel guilty for not making more money. Its supposed to be a partnership not a competition, so the more money brought into the partnership the better. I don't care who does the bringing.
  • DeltaZero
    DeltaZero Posts: 1,197 Member
    But, can you make a sandwich?

    What kitchen job pays so well. Are you a Top Chef?



    not srs.
  • tlcarolinagirl
    tlcarolinagirl Posts: 1,700 Member
    No, as long as she knows her place.


    not srs

    I felt my blood pressure shoot straight through the roof for a second there. I waz 'bout to tell you off! :laugh:
  • fitfan11
    fitfan11 Posts: 544 Member
    I never had a problem with it. My ex earned almost 2x as much as I did.
  • Holly_Roman_Empire
    Holly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,440 Member
    My husband didn't have a problem with me making more, as much as he had a problem with the fact that I was working and he was not. I think that has more to do with having a job/not having a job than it does with the actual money, though.
  • bperkins88
    bperkins88 Posts: 357 Member
    I've never dated anyone who makes more than me, but I'm sure if I did I wouldn't mind it
  • DaWayne360
    DaWayne360 Posts: 261 Member
    It's a requirement. I'm unemployed.

    JK. No I have no problem with that, especially if she is smart with her money too.
  • stephen4232
    stephen4232 Posts: 1,583 Member
    No problem with this, my wife makes 2 1/2 times more than me. Nut we have 1 joint account and view it as our money and not his or hers.
  • Chieflrg
    Chieflrg Posts: 9,097 Member
    I've dated women who were struggling to pay bills and ones that are extremely well off and in the public eye.

    Its about the person, not about the money.
  • fitfan11
    fitfan11 Posts: 544 Member
    Being in the military I always meet women that are higher earners. For me it's about job satisfaction and not about bank accounts. If she loves what she does then I'm happy for her.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    my husband pretends he doesnt mind but he does... he rarely accepts me paying for anything.. but i just figure its his problem not mine!
  • sullus
    sullus Posts: 2,839 Member
    My situation is such that I'll never have to answer that question - I'm an engineer, my wife was in daycare. Just different ends of the pay spectrum, y'know?

    BUT .. there's a secondary dynamic ... She was assistant director of an in-house corporate daycare center, and later went on to manage the building process and direct a privately owned daycare center. She was in charge. Did the hiring, budgets .. like ... everything. She was in a position of authority and respect.

    Me, I was the nerd in the corner with the 10 computers around my desk.

    I didn't have a PROBLEM with that, per se. But while I was proud of her and though it was awseome and have the utmost respect for her, there was just a little jealousy in me. Like .. I wanted to be the man, man.

    This turned out to be positive jealousy, though; It was never an issue between us personally, and it made me step it up in my career so I could be like her ..

    I'm not phrasing all this as well as I need to because it's complicated .. but I hope you get the gist. Sometimes it's not just about the number on the paycheck.
  • lauren3101
    lauren3101 Posts: 1,853 Member
    I earn almost 3 times what my partner does and he doesn't mind at all, he's a kept man! :laugh:
  • tlcarolinagirl
    tlcarolinagirl Posts: 1,700 Member
    Being in the military I always meet women that are higher earners. For me it's about job satisfaction and not about bank accounts. If she loves what she does then I'm happy for her.

    Ahh, see and there's part of the problem, I bet. Maybe it's more about the job than the money? Jealousy maybe? I love my job. I am at a pretty high demand and get to travel quite often...(wow, that can be taken out of context).
  • fitfan11
    fitfan11 Posts: 544 Member
    Being in the military I always meet women that are higher earners. For me it's about job satisfaction and not about bank accounts. If she loves what she does then I'm happy for her.

    Ahh, see and there's part of the problem, I bet. Maybe it's more about the job than the money? Jealousy maybe? I love my job. I am at a pretty high demand and get to travel quite often...(wow, that can be taken out of context).

    Who would read anything into that last remark? Surely no one.....LOL!

    Did you get the answers you expected?
  • tlcarolinagirl
    tlcarolinagirl Posts: 1,700 Member

    I didn't have a PROBLEM with that, per se. But while I was proud of her and though it was awseome and have the utmost respect for her, there was just a little jealousy in me. Like .. I wanted to be the man, man.

    This turned out to be positive jealousy, though; It was never an issue between us personally, and it made me step it up in my career so I could be like her ..

    Thanks for your honesty, because this is what I've seen, only it isn't positive jealousy.
  • 1PatientBear
    1PatientBear Posts: 2,089 Member
    No problem with it unless the women makes the guy feel guilty for not making more money. Its supposed to be a partnership not a competition, so the more money brought into the partnership the better. I don't care who does the bringing.

    ^^^ Completely this.
  • sullus
    sullus Posts: 2,839 Member

    I didn't have a PROBLEM with that, per se. But while I was proud of her and though it was awseome and have the utmost respect for her, there was just a little jealousy in me. Like .. I wanted to be the man, man.

    This turned out to be positive jealousy, though; It was never an issue between us personally, and it made me step it up in my career so I could be like her ..

    Thanks for your honesty, because this is what I've seen, only it isn't positive jealousy.

    The key was realizing that to bring her down to my level would have been destructive. Rising to her level is the correct answer. I couldnt blame her for being better than me at what she did. Fixing it meant fixing me.
  • micahnelson
    micahnelson Posts: 92 Member
    Any guy that would want his wife to make less than him is an selfish knob. You should always root for your spouse's success, and if she has chosen to enter the workforce, that typically means money.

    If she makes more than you, awesome! Take her out to celebrate. Better Yet, let her take you out.
  • velocityc6
    velocityc6 Posts: 2,137 Member
    I think it would be awesome if my wife made more than me. I could buy more toys.
  • tlcarolinagirl
    tlcarolinagirl Posts: 1,700 Member
    Being in the military I always meet women that are higher earners. For me it's about job satisfaction and not about bank accounts. If she loves what she does then I'm happy for her.

    Ahh, see and there's part of the problem, I bet. Maybe it's more about the job than the money? Jealousy maybe? I love my job. I am at a pretty high demand and get to travel quite often...(wow, that can be taken out of context).

    Who would read anything into that last remark? Surely no one.....LOL!

    Did you get the answers you expected?

    :smile: Yes and no. It's definitely interesting to hear other people weigh in on it, but my experience has been so different from I read here. I just think that there is a power struggle when there shouldn't be. I don't care about the money. It goes in a bank account and pays bills and the rest is just gravy.
  • Big_Banana
    Big_Banana Posts: 7
    I would be grateful because we would be extremely wealthy, since I don't do so bad myself.
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
    I couldn't date a man who had a problem with this...

    At the same time, just because I might make more should not mean that I always pay or that I don't want to be taken out and shown a good time.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,992 Member
    Nope. My DW makes WAY more money than I do. So I get to stay at home and work just part time and play more Playstation.:laugh:

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • fitfan11
    fitfan11 Posts: 544 Member
    I hope you and your significant can find some middle ground on this issue. It is sad when we let money come between us.

    Continue to reach out if you need advice.....Best of luck to you.
  • Dan_Druff
    Dan_Druff Posts: 104
    Do you have a problem with your woman making more money than you? Yes, this is a serious question.I know men who have major "power" issues with their woman making more money than they do. They don't mind spending it, but it's clear they feel threatened by it when they bring it up often.What do you think?

    It's not sexy when women make more than men.
  • Marcia315
    Marcia315 Posts: 460 Member
    Do you have a problem with your woman making more money than you? Yes, this is a serious question.I know men who have major "power" issues with their woman making more money than they do. They don't mind spending it, but it's clear they feel threatened by it when they bring it up often.What do you think?

    It's not sexy when women make more than men.

    I make more than my husband. He thinks it's sexy.
  • tlcarolinagirl
    tlcarolinagirl Posts: 1,700 Member
    Do you have a problem with your woman making more money than you? Yes, this is a serious question.I know men who have major "power" issues with their woman making more money than they do. They don't mind spending it, but it's clear they feel threatened by it when they bring it up often.What do you think?

    It's not sexy when women make more than men.

    Are you being serious?
  • IPAkiller
    IPAkiller Posts: 711 Member
    I have no issues with it what so ever and actually welcome it. My past partner choice did not reflect this in it gets quite tiring busting my *kitten* everyday only to have someone demand half of what I make, insist we go on vacations because "WE" can afford it, while "I" pay all the bills and also insist "WE" buy new things to impress "HER" friends.

    On top of it, If my mate made a considerable amount more, I'd be more than happy to cook, clean and have a bottle of wine with "lip service" at the end of a work day. All that on top of doing all the typical manstuffs that so many of today’s “male” society has forgotten how to do.

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