Guys, do you like it when the woman makes the first move?

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Replies

  • T_R_A_V
    T_R_A_V Posts: 1,629 Member
    Yes I make the first move at times, can't wait around for it to happen.

    Gotta go for what u want. If u wait it may pass

    This is what I'm afraid of, but I also don't want to make a move too soon. I've only known this guy for a month.

    Never live life with the "what if" factor. Take a chance
  • heylookitsval
    heylookitsval Posts: 1,141 Member
    Yes I make the first move at times, can't wait around for it to happen.

    Gotta go for what u want. If u wait it may pass

    This is what I'm afraid of, but I also don't want to make a move too soon. I've only known this guy for a month.

    What's the worst that can happen? he's not into you?
  • emirror
    emirror Posts: 842 Member
    It usually end up being mutual interest is shown, and when it becomes obvious, then plans are made to get together again. Meeting people tends to happen when I'm doing something in a social situation, not just someone walking up to me for no real reason.

    I only approached a stranger once... I saw him from across the room. I had been out dancing, and he was standing with all his buddies (a bunch of them, around 8 maybe?) by the dance floor. It was country dancing, and the 2-step is easy, and he had been staring at me, so I went over and asked him to dance. He declined. I was shocked. His buddies were shocked. I leaned in and asked him if he was really going to make me turn tail and walk away. He said he wasn't a good dancer. I shrugged and walked away, turning back to look just in time to see several of his friends slug his arm, point at me, and look like WTF. He came and found me later and asked me out to dinner.

    But, man, walking away sucked.
  • lmhbuss
    lmhbuss Posts: 282 Member
    I have a few times in the past......loooooong ago when I was single. It almost always worked out well! There was this one jacked up time when he said he'd love to go out, let me take him out to dinner and drinks....and then the whole time we were both super awkward and had nothing in common...and that was the end of that. However, if YOU ask HIM out, do come prepared to pay for the evening. If he offers to pay, let him pay for dessert afterwards somewhere or parking or whatever....but do NOT expect him to pay if you did the inviting. If all goes well, he can catch the next round. :happy:
  • RECowgill
    RECowgill Posts: 881 Member
    It usually end up being mutual interest is shown, and when it becomes obvious, then plans are made to get together again. Meeting people tends to happen when I'm doing something in a social situation, not just someone walking up to me for no real reason.

    I only approached a stranger once... I saw him from across the room. I had been out dancing, and he was standing with all his buddies (a bunch of them, around 8 maybe?) by the dance floor. It was country dancing, and the 2-step is easy, and he had been staring at me, so I went over and asked him to dance. He declined. I was shocked. His buddies were shocked. I leaned in and asked him if he was really going to make me turn tail and walk away. He said he wasn't a good dancer. I shrugged and walked away, turning back to look just in time to see several of his friends slug his arm, point at me, and look like WTF. He came and found me later and asked me out to dinner.

    But, man, walking away sucked.

    I would've jumped in. I'll dance with you! Even if you said no it would've been fine. ;)
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    Yes I make the first move at times, can't wait around for it to happen.

    Gotta go for what u want. If u wait it may pass

    This is what I'm afraid of, but I also don't want to make a move too soon. I've only known this guy for a month.

    Have you been flirting with him or giving any indication you're interested? In any case, why not just ask him out for a coffee or to a happy hour?
  • pastryari
    pastryari Posts: 8,646 Member
    No, I've never asked a guy out.
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
    Honestly, no. Subtlety is a wonderful thing.
  • aloranger7708
    aloranger7708 Posts: 422 Member
    Yes I make the first move at times, can't wait around for it to happen.

    Gotta go for what u want. If u wait it may pass

    This is what I'm afraid of, but I also don't want to make a move too soon. I've only known this guy for a month.

    Have you been flirting with him or giving any indication you're interested? In any case, why not just ask him out for a coffee or to a happy hour?

    We talk almost every day, whether its a simple conversation or it goes deeper (his father has cancer and we talk about that). There is flirtation, and he always seems relaxed and happy to see me. The other day at the gym he came over to me a few times to talk or ask a silly question. But he has my number and never texts/calls. So I don't know....
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
    I don't generally ask guys out, but I do make it perfectly clear that I would say yes if they asked me out. I have done it a couple of times. No big deal.
  • daybehavior
    daybehavior Posts: 1,319 Member
    We talk almost every day, whether its a simple conversation or it goes deeper (his father has cancer and we talk about that). There is flirtation, and he always seems relaxed and happy to see me. The other day at the gym he came over to me a few times to talk or ask a silly question. But he has my number and never texts/calls. So I don't know....

    That's not a good sign.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    I can't do it. Just can't. IDK why.
  • HDHogger
    HDHogger Posts: 764
    I said earlier I don't know I've always made the first move. After reading the comments there is a lot of grey area, I think. I guess if someone would define when the first move takes place this would be easier to say if I do. Is the first move a passing smile or the first time you sleep together or on your fifth anniversary. I would be willing to bet that when it comes to first time sex, men make the first move more often than not, but like it's been said it would be a turn on and show confidence in a woman.if she made the first move.
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    I don't care how much lip gloss you apply before hand, talking abt cancer is not flirting:laugh:
  • emirror
    emirror Posts: 842 Member
    It usually end up being mutual interest is shown, and when it becomes obvious, then plans are made to get together again. Meeting people tends to happen when I'm doing something in a social situation, not just someone walking up to me for no real reason.

    I only approached a stranger once... I saw him from across the room. I had been out dancing, and he was standing with all his buddies (a bunch of them, around 8 maybe?) by the dance floor. It was country dancing, and the 2-step is easy, and he had been staring at me, so I went over and asked him to dance. He declined. I was shocked. His buddies were shocked. I leaned in and asked him if he was really going to make me turn tail and walk away. He said he wasn't a good dancer. I shrugged and walked away, turning back to look just in time to see several of his friends slug his arm, point at me, and look like WTF. He came and found me later and asked me out to dinner.

    But, man, walking away sucked.

    I would've jumped in. I'll dance with you! Even if you said no it would've been fine. ;)


    AWWWW! My hero! :flowerforyou: :bigsmile:
  • aloranger7708
    aloranger7708 Posts: 422 Member
    I don't care how much lip gloss you apply before hand, talking abt cancer is not flirting:laugh:

    Haha! I mentioned that to show that we talk about deeper things than flirting... but there is a lot of flirting.
  • KingofWisdom
    KingofWisdom Posts: 229 Member
    Dear god, yes. I have social anxiety, but I guess as a dude, I'm just supposed to suck it up.
  • Emmetkelly
    Emmetkelly Posts: 23 Member
    I met my boyfriend on a dating site. I've made all of the moves. I messaged him first, asked him out (about a week after our first message), and asked him if he wanted to be exclusive with me. He's told me that he wished I hadn't asked him to be my boyfriend because he wanted to ask me that -- and when it comes to marriage, I better not ask him because he wants that moment.

    If you like a guy, why not make the first move? Either they say no and you can feel down for a little while, or they say yes and you could start a wonderful romance.
  • wozkaa
    wozkaa Posts: 224 Member
    I was happy to if I think the dude even knows I am alive, or interested. Have done a few times, some success and some 'not so much' success -eg. 'We can be friends and see what happens'... really? Sure I'll be your friend but that's it, I'm not pushing the issue anymore. I WILL make sure the girls are on display when I see you, though...


    Married...with children now. Non issue.
  • SwitzEngine
    SwitzEngine Posts: 3,418 Member
    I am very shy and never do the first move.
  • moya_rargh
    moya_rargh Posts: 1,473 Member
    40 next month, NEVER had this happen. I can only dream!
  • FoxBean
    FoxBean Posts: 910 Member
    I usually always made the first move..
  • moya_rargh
    moya_rargh Posts: 1,473 Member
    Then again, I don't make the first move either!!!
  • Rdlm1001
    Rdlm1001 Posts: 47 Member
    I think it is about deciding what kind of a relationship you want. Are you the "call the shots" type of woman or do you like to be more passive. I am very strong in the world, but in my relationship I prefer a man who I can trust to take charge. So I make my moves with a look or a touch or a smile. If a the guy I am with isn't the type to grab my signals and go, well we won't work out. However I have friends who wear the pants and they set that tone in the beginning. Plus I do think men who have to hunt a bit and take the lead work harder to impress you than the guy you chase. You chase a guy, you are trying to impress them.
  • ge105
    ge105 Posts: 268 Member
    Worked for me. I made the first move on my guy. Just randomly started asking him if he was taking classes at the uni, where he was going (we were at a bus stop) how he was liking his classes etc. Bus was late, we talked for an hour. I gave him my number. Four years in now :smile: .
  • HDHogger
    HDHogger Posts: 764
    What is "The First Move"? A kiss, A date, First time sex?
  • SexKittenlovesitrough
    SexKittenlovesitrough Posts: 486
    I made the first move. It was totally worth it. He was shy and unsure how to approach. We are both thankful I did. However, he has recently become aware (on his own) that I am equally shy, and as such how much courage it took for me to make that move.

    He's thankful I did. I'm thankful he made follow up moves to continue us on the path we are on.
  • HDHogger
    HDHogger Posts: 764
    I do think men who have to hunt a bit and take the lead work harder to impress you than the guy you chase. You chase a guy, you are trying to impress them.
    I think this way is what make lasting relationships. IMO Call me old fashioned, the man takes the woman!
  • BrienJD
    BrienJD Posts: 541 Member
    Yes please
  • djxil
    djxil Posts: 357
    Women are the gatekeepers guys, they always make the first move, we are just too stupid to notice it. I guess I am old old school, a woman extends her hand to the man, she is inviting him into her space. Now, in today's society, I guess, it does not matter.

    Yes, I like the woman to make the first overt move to let me know it's ok to approach her. It's just too bad I so oblivious, that they have to carry a baseball bat.

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