Husband forgot a double anniversary!?!?!?
Replies
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Sounds like OP is half the problem. Can you please let your husband come tell his side of the story.
DIS GON BE GOOD.0 -
Without details, I'm not going with mafia, i'm going with insider trading or embezzlement just based on OP's tastes and his willingness to proceed regardless.
I fear OP that since this was a traumatic day in his life he may WANT to forget and if you want to stay with him, you might want to have a recommitment ceremony or whatever they call those like second wedding or something. I think he and you both probably need to redefine and solidify your marriage post his mistake and it will also give you the opportunity to select a NEW wedding date which you will celebrate.
When you select the church to renew your vows I'd suggest asking them to provide you the same counseling they make new married couples take, just to see if your high expectations and demanding nature in any way led him to take such drastic measures willingly as to end up in handcuffs. You never know you might come out MORE committed, honest and bonded to one another than ever before once you suss out how that predicament really came about from you two and where his heart truly is despite the consequences of his mistaken actions.
Are you kidding??? The guy commits a crime (KNOWS it's a crime and does it anyway!), and cheats on her and you want to say she's possibly to blame??? Thanks for setting women back 50 yrs...maybe she should just greet him at the door, barefoot, apron on and drink in hand... SMH....0 -
I really think it's a "guy thing" not to offend any guys on here though!
Nope. My wife can remember the date, but she can't remember the year - and thus, can't remember how long we've been married. BTW - it was 1998, so 15-1/2 years.
OP: It could be worse. He could forget he's married. :laugh:
He's cheated on me and taken his ring off... so not so funny. cause he did that already
:huh: So it sounds like this anniversary thing should be NBD in comparison.0 -
We got married on 12/12 because we're both terrible with dates. And I'm worse than he is...the only reason I can remember his birthday is because it's exactly one month after Valentine's day, LOL...0
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Well these posts make me feel inadequate....I have a calendar on the fridge, a daytimer in my purse, and I use post it notes all over to remind me of dates, and things that need to be done. If I don't, I seriously forget. My mind goes at warp speed all day and I just forget. :sad:0
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My husband got me a couple of kittens as a wedding present when we got married as he knew I'd always wanted a cat. Fast forward to the following year and I mix up our first wedding anniversary (11th of the month) with the cat's first birthday (22nd of the month)! Even I couldn't bluff that I'd bought him a tin of tuna as a wedding present LOL Fortunately he found it funny (and we've been together 20 years this year, married 13 of those).0
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He's cheated on me and taken his ring off... so not so funny. cause he did that already
And he's a criminal...sorry but NO. You should be heading to divorce court, not a hotel and limo, IMHO.
If she is still with him, that is up to her. Don't every women start telling her what she should be doing. This isn't your marriage.
When you ask for marital advice on a fitness page, you get...advice about your marriage. Especially when you disclose your husband was arrested for a crime on your last anniversary and he cheats on you. But yeah, that is no reason to be disappointed in your marriage. Thanks for clarifying that. And BTW you may want to reconsider telling "every women" what they can and can't do.0 -
My husband and I both don't care about birthdays and anniversaries. I guess we are a good match that way. It's the interaction you have with him the other 364 days of the year that matters, not one particular day.
Those things are not mutually exclusive. You can certainly cherish and have fun the "other 364 days" yet still want to celebrate the day the love of you life was brought into this world and sent on an incredible path that would eventually lead to you, or celebrate the day you publically proclaimed your love.
I mean, it's great if you are with someone who doesn't care about those things if you don't care about those things. That does make you a good match for each other, but it doesn't mean that everyone else is doing it wrong.0 -
Some are not good with remembering dates...I say put a big "heart" on the calendar and let him know that's the date you want to celebrate your anniversary.0 -
I really think it's a "guy thing" not to offend any guys on here though!Well these posts make me feel inadequate....I have a calendar on the fridge, a daytimer in my purse, and I use post it notes all over to remind me of dates, and things that need to be done. If I don't, I seriously forget. My mind goes at warp speed all day and I just forget. :sad:
I hate to inform you of this, but it appears you might be a guy.0 -
I understand that the date is important to you, but after all it is still a number on a calendar. Your glossing over the fact that he planned something! It would have been much worse if he had forgotten it all together.
Don't sweat the small stuff and be thankful for what you have.0 -
He's cheated on me and taken his ring off... so not so funny. cause he did that already
And he's a criminal...sorry but NO. You should be heading to divorce court, not a hotel and limo, IMHO.
If she is still with him, that is up to her. Don't every women start telling her what she should be doing. This isn't your marriage.
When you ask for marital advice on a fitness page, you get...advice about your marriage. Especially when you disclose your husband was arrested for a crime on your last anniversary and he cheats on you. But yeah, that is no reason to be disappointed in your marriage. Thanks for clarifying that. And BTW you may want to reconsider telling "every women" what they can and can't do.
I completely agree with you. And I shouldn't have used "every". Advise is all good and fine. I just don't feel that anyone should ever tell someone to divorce a person and they know nothing about both parties. If that is something she wants to do fine and I'm not saying she doesn't have the right considering the info she gave. I just hold my marriage special and we keep the "D" word out of the house.0 -
That's what the calendar on the smart phone is for...0
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My husband got me a couple of kittens as a wedding present when we got married as he knew I'd always wanted a cat. Fast forward to the following year and I mix up our first wedding anniversary (11th of the month) with the cat's first birthday (22nd of the month)! Even I couldn't bluff that I'd bought him a tin of tuna as a wedding present LOL Fortunately he found it funny (and we've been together 20 years this year, married 13 of those).
You're adorable!
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Meh. Cut him some slack. As far as being detained and questioned, you probably should have left that part out of the story.0
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I completely agree with you. And I shouldn't have used "every". Advise is all good and fine. I just don't feel that anyone should ever tell someone to divorce a person and they know nothing about both parties. If that is something she wants to do fine and I'm not saying she doesn't have the right considering the info she gave. I just hold my marriage special and we keep the "D" word out of the house.
No one completely agrees with me. It's a bad idea...
I think it is awesome how you feel about your marriage and very refreshing. Keep up the good work.0 -
Divorce.
Boom, mikey's internet rule in three posts!0 -
why is it important? Is he married to you? Does he treat you good? Is he celebrating the day you got married regardless of the day it is?
I think you have a lot to be thankful for and less going on the internet to make your husband look bad and more respecting him would go a long way.
#JMHO0 -
This is a long replied post so I didn't read thru half the comments so forgive me if this has been said but if you knew he put it on the wrong date, why didn't you just say "hey, our anni is this day, not the one you put it on"? I mix up dates all the time but I know I've mixed them up because someone TOLD me I did! I use google calendar and it send me texts for reminders, maybe that would be an option. But yea, just tell him its the wrong day every bloody year he does it!
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WIKIPEDIA: "n Internet slang, a troll is a person who sows discord on the Internet by starting arguments or upsetting people,[1] by posting inflammatory, [2] extraneous, or off-topic messages in an online community (such as a forum, chat room, or blog), either accidentally[3][4] or with the deliberate intent of provoking readers into an emotional response[5] or of otherwise disrupting normal on-topic discussion.[6]"
So I guess I may be an accidental troll....?
I'm not trying to get anything special from posting this, just seeing if I am overreacting by being upset....
The back story was to emphasize how it shouldn't be that difficult to remember when something that significant happened just a year ago...on the same day! He has apologized and admitted his mistake about the date and at least remembers the month and year!
Oh and I made my choice a year ago to stay with my husband, people make mistakes and we are all fallible, and ALL worthy of forgiveness.
I think you have your answer right here, OP. Forgive him, enjoy your evening on "the wrong day", and move on.
This! Definitely this!0 -
I've been married for 42 years, 43 next month, and the only year that he EVER got the date right was the year I was busy with a project ( I'm a gourd artist) and forgot all about the anniversary myself until he presented me with a scrapbook full of photos of my gourd art, and I was saying "Thanks, what's this for? Anniversary? Hell, was it this month?..."
We don't do anything special anyway, just go out to a restaurant for dinner, we don't usually bother with cards or gifts. Not a big priority.0 -
maybe its just me and I didn't read all of the other responses, but what if he wasn't here to celebrate tomorrow? Why not let it go? I get that its an important date, but not everyone is great at remembering exact dates. Let the fact that he forgot the actual date go and be happy that he made big plans to celebrate. Choose your battles...0
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It's not just a "guy thing"... I'm a chick and I can't remember my anniversary all the time either. I am horrible at remembering dates cuz it's just not my thing I guess. And I really don't give a rip! Most important thing is to love
each other unconditionally. 0 -
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I've been married for 42 years, 43 next month, and the only year that he EVER got the date right was the year I was busy with a project ( I'm a gourd artist) and forgot all about the anniversary myself until he presented me with a scrapbook full of photos of my gourd art, and I was saying "Thanks, what's this for? Anniversary? Hell, was it this month?..."
We don't do anything special anyway, just go out to a restaurant for dinner, we don't usually bother with cards or gifts. Not a big priority.
That is so sweet!0 -
this is why we picked a memorable day to get married -- July 4th.0
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Deleted0
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im horrible with numbers. ill tell you its 10.5 and its probably closer to 6 (maybe 6.5 if its really humid)
if i say it was 45 minutes its probably closer to 5.36 minutes
im just bad with numbers all around, dates or otherwise
Wait....Are you my husband????0 -
im horrible with numbers. ill tell you its 10.5 and its probably closer to 6 (maybe 6.5 if its really humid)
if i say it was 45 minutes its probably closer to 5.36 minutes
im just bad with numbers all around, dates or otherwise
Wait....Are you my husband????
honey...we need to talk0 -
My husband and I are celebrating our 10 year anniversary. Not of our marriage- I honestly couldn't be sure which day, month or year that happened- it didn't matter too much to either of us. Because, of course it was only the day we signed legal documents for the state... and we only did it to protect our son. So, the meaningful one, which happens in February is when we fell in love- when our true union began. We have never celebrated an anniversary until now. It never hurt my feelings because I know how dedicated, loyal, loving and honorable he is and I am. Why do people get hung up on these pre-ordained days? Valentines day...? etc. Do people wait and hold out for those days to be shown some dramatic observation in order to feel loved and appreciated, respected? Is it because they don't feel that all along... and then when the day comes and there is nothing special going on, then it is further evidence of a lack of love etc? I know I am in the minority here, but I guess I care more about meaningful gestures of love and appreciation all along the way versus holding out for the one day to prove love, caring, appreciation. I go for the truly meaningful versus the forced, commercially driven, designated days.0
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