Husband forgot a double anniversary!?!?!?

Wow you are getting some harsh commentary here. As someone who hates birthdays, forgot my own anniversary, and generally thinks most hallmark moments are BS, I can't really relate. On the other hand, if this was important to you, and you made that clear, I can understand your disappointment and I think you have a right to it. If I let my husband know something is important to me WHATEVER that may be, and he blows it off, gets it wrong, or doesn't appear to care - I am pissed and let him know. And believe me, after 25 years, it is a two-way street. I don't think this is about your anniversary, honey. It is about your disappointment in your marriage. And that sucks.

Wow! That is reaching pretty far to tell her she is disappointed in her marriage.

I just lost my husband to cancer after 35 years of marriage. Don't sweat the small stuff. It's all over Before you know it and all this little carp doesn't mean carp in the big picture. :frown:

My husband planned an anniversary outing, but forgot when our anniversary was and planned it on the wrong day... why does this bother me so much... because a year ago on our anniversary he was apprehended and questioned by investigators, regarding something I am not at liberty to talk about, and i remember how sad it made me because I had big plans for our day (luxury car, massage, spa, private room in a nice restaurant, night out in a nice hotel, etc... all cancelled).

So, let me get this straight...he was apprehended and question in what was likely one of the worst days of his life and you were sad because you had to cancel dinner???

That's honestly just a miniscule part of it... but like I said I can't go into details.... likely one of the worst days of his life = he knew what he was doing and still did it and got caught and ended up hurting his wife and 3 kids in the process

Without details, I'm not going with mafia, i'm going with insider trading or embezzlement just based on OP's tastes and his willingness to proceed regardless.

I fear OP that since this was a traumatic day in his life he may WANT to forget and if you want to stay with him, you might want to have a recommitment ceremony or whatever they call those like second wedding or something. I think he and you both probably need to redefine and solidify your marriage post his mistake and it will also give you the opportunity to select a NEW wedding date which you will celebrate.

When you select the church to renew your vows I'd suggest asking them to provide you the same counseling they make new married couples take, just to see if your high expectations and demanding nature in any way led him to take such drastic measures willingly as to end up in handcuffs. You never know you might come out MORE committed, honest and bonded to one another than ever before once you suss out how that predicament really came about from you two and where his heart truly is despite the consequences of his mistaken actions.

My husband and I both don't care about birthdays and anniversaries. I guess we are a good match that way. It's the interaction you have with him the other 364 days of the year that matters, not one particular day.

I really think it's a "guy thing" not to offend any guys on here though!

Well these posts make me feel inadequate....I have a calendar on the fridge, a daytimer in my purse, and I use post it notes all over to remind me of dates, and things that need to be done. If I don't, I seriously forget. My mind goes at warp speed all day and I just forget. :sad: