Beyond Unsupportive: Wednesday Morning Rant
ThinLizzie0802
Posts: 863 Member
in Chit-Chat
My 'as of this upcoming Saturday moving out ex" had some very nasty things to say this weekend/week that just blow my mind.
Thank god he's not on the lease and hasn't paid March rent yet- 3 years of wtf was I thinking.
I've been working my butt off for the past two months on diet and exercise, really putting the effort in with no excuses. I've lost 14 lbs since I rebooted at the start of January. I invite him to the gym and he declines. I don't push him. I don't pester him. I discuss my workouts with him because it's part of my day and I thought he would be proud of what I was doing-making a change for the better. We've both gained a substantial amount of weight in the past two years. I know this has an effect on a relationship so I'm taking the steps to change that.
On Sunday I brought up some issues going on in our relationship that have just been chewing at my brain. The response I got was "I'm tired of banging a fatass. I want a hot blonde." Mind. Blown. Just unacceptable. I didn't provoke a drag out fight over this because I hate spending a whole week at work depressed and exhausted from fighting. I didn't speak to him Monday at all until the evening. He's a spiteful hateful fighter and I wasn't going to set myself up for another attack so when that comment was made all I said was "That's unacceptable" and asked him to leave for a while. Then Monday night all he says to me is "Are we going to be mad at each other forever?" Are you frickin' insane. First of all: you have nothing to be mad at me about, and second of all: something like that just doesn't blow over.
I started doing two-a-days and have been really proud of myself. He gets home from work last night and out of habit I start to small talk with him and I brought up that I was really sore and had done a lot of work and his response was "I'm not impressed. Stop telling me about your workouts. It's weird and I don't care." Mind blown again.
There's no fixing that **** and its unacceptable, so goodbye bf.
Thank god he's not on the lease and hasn't paid March rent yet- 3 years of wtf was I thinking.
I've been working my butt off for the past two months on diet and exercise, really putting the effort in with no excuses. I've lost 14 lbs since I rebooted at the start of January. I invite him to the gym and he declines. I don't push him. I don't pester him. I discuss my workouts with him because it's part of my day and I thought he would be proud of what I was doing-making a change for the better. We've both gained a substantial amount of weight in the past two years. I know this has an effect on a relationship so I'm taking the steps to change that.
On Sunday I brought up some issues going on in our relationship that have just been chewing at my brain. The response I got was "I'm tired of banging a fatass. I want a hot blonde." Mind. Blown. Just unacceptable. I didn't provoke a drag out fight over this because I hate spending a whole week at work depressed and exhausted from fighting. I didn't speak to him Monday at all until the evening. He's a spiteful hateful fighter and I wasn't going to set myself up for another attack so when that comment was made all I said was "That's unacceptable" and asked him to leave for a while. Then Monday night all he says to me is "Are we going to be mad at each other forever?" Are you frickin' insane. First of all: you have nothing to be mad at me about, and second of all: something like that just doesn't blow over.
I started doing two-a-days and have been really proud of myself. He gets home from work last night and out of habit I start to small talk with him and I brought up that I was really sore and had done a lot of work and his response was "I'm not impressed. Stop telling me about your workouts. It's weird and I don't care." Mind blown again.
There's no fixing that **** and its unacceptable, so goodbye bf.
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Replies
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Good riddance! Doesn't sound like he's worth your time.0
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Obviously there are underlying issues here. Sounds like it's the best thing for both of you.0
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I've come to realize that he will never be proud, interested, supportive, etc, of anything I do. No congrats on a new job. No way to go for reaching a goal. No thanks for anything I do to try and brighten his day. Whatever his underlying issues are, I just can't help him try to figure them out anymore. And by help him I mean be an emotional punching bag.0
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What Fevre said! You attempted to open dialogue about some of your relationship issues and he clearly wasn't interested in resolving anything. It doesn't really matter where his remarks come from, they were, as you said, completely unacceptable. Props to you for recognizing an unhealthy situation and deciding you deserve better.0
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Sounds like this upcoming Saturday your are going to be losing a lot of unhealthy, useless fat all at once. Now, that's what I call a Non-Scale Victory!0
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Sounds like it's the best thing for both of you.
Agreed. Break ups are never pleasant but on the plus side, at least you can now focus totally on yourself. Sounds like you are doing great and making good progress towards your goals without his encouragement anyway so if anything thsi will only make it even easier for you to push forward since you won't have to deal with his negativity. :flowerforyou:0 -
Sounds like this upcoming Saturday your are going to be losing a lot of unhealthy, useless fat all at once. Now, that's what I call a Non-Scale Victory!
Love it!0 -
while i am a little surprised he made it past his first comment, i can't think of anything healthier at the moment than dropping this dead weight from your life0
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So you are single?0
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I've come to realize that he will never be proud, interested, supportive, etc, of anything I do.
i had one of those. terrible waste of six years. now i know better. :indifferent:0 -
So you are single?
Get in line, pal.
Ahem...0 -
Sounds like good riddance! You will meet some hottie at the gym. I hear deadlifts are a good way to get someone to talk to you!:laugh:0
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I know it's a cliche to say so, but that sort of stuff usually boils down to jealousy. He hasn't moved his butt. You know you've moved yours. He knows you're trying hard, ergo, it's your biggest vulnerability right now.
Kick him out. Move on.0 -
Wow. Good job getting rid of him! He was probably jealous and feeling inadequate because you were bettering yourself and he didn't have the balls to better himself. Well done standing up for yourself!0
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Sounds like this upcoming Saturday your are going to be losing a lot of unhealthy, useless fat all at once. Now, that's what I call a Non-Scale Victory!
You hit the nail on the head with that one!0 -
Good for you! I may not know you but, I'm proud of you for standing up to the jerk and realizing that he is dead weight! Best of luck to you and congratulations on continuing to hit your goals!0
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Tell him he was not the last of the red hot lovers and you faked your orgasms out of pity.0
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What an *kitten*. Somethings are broken beyond repair. Don't let the door hit you on the way out.0
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Sounds like this upcoming Saturday your are going to be losing a lot of unhealthy, useless fat all at once. Now, that's what I call a Non-Scale Victory!
:drinker:0 -
Just wow. Congrats on getting rid of him cause you deserve so much better! Best of luck :flowerforyou: xx0
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while i am a little surprised he made it past his first comment, i can't think of anything healthier at the moment than dropping this dead weight from your life
^^^^0 -
Good for you for sticking with it despite his unsupportive ways in the start. Good for you for realizing that you don't need his hateful ways. And kudos to you for not letting him destroy your self-esteem with such a hateful comment. He clearly has issues that go beyond anything anyone can do for him. Getting rid of him will be a huge weight off of you and will probably help you on this journey quite a bit. What a jerk. I think we're all gonna cheer you on today.
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"I'm tired of banging a fatass. I want a hot blonde."
My ex did something similar. He got the blonde. And I got hot. And a few shades darker with my hair. I win.0 -
Bye, Bye !! Who needs him ?? Let the door slam his hinny on the way out!0
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while i am a little surprised he made it past his first comment, i can't think of anything healthier at the moment than dropping this dead weight from your life
^This!
In addition, using the word "bang" to describe making love sends up a bajillion red flags! How utterly reckless, unkind and selfish!0 -
Obviously your significant other does not want to relate to a person but rather a body(preferably a hot blonde). That's why we women tend to define ourselves by what we look like because that's how some members of society see us, rather like decorative statues rather than people with thoughts and feeling that have relevance. I think you are better off without him. Rant on! You have every right to. :explode:0
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Good for you for realizing he's a jerk and tossing him out.
but why wait til Saturday?
Kick him out now! lol0 -
"I'm tired of banging a fatass. I want a hot blonde."
Girl, you're a better person that I.....
I would have straight up kicked him in the balls. :drinker:0 -
Celebrate the loss of all that dead weight!0
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