Can't stop bingeing and hate myself :(
specky4eyes
Posts: 18 Member
I keep trying to keep up with myfitness pal and I had lost just over 9lb but then something happens and I start bingeing and then I have triouble stopping 
I really hate the way I look and am and yet even that doesn't inspire me to carry on
I went to the docs and said I had a problem with food and wish something drastic would happen to force me to change my eating habits like getting a life threatening disease (please don't hate me for thinking like this I was jus so desperate) but he just offered to up my anti-depressants
I keep reading about people who have lost a lot of weight and wish I could do the same but I just don't seem to be able to - I guess I'm lazy.???
Can anyone please HELP as I just can't seem to help myself and even when I turn to the professionals they just don't seem bothered
I've got three beautiful children and a loving husband and so want to get back to being fit and healthy and looking better for it but something inside just won't seem to let me
I really hate the way I look and am and yet even that doesn't inspire me to carry on I went to the docs and said I had a problem with food and wish something drastic would happen to force me to change my eating habits like getting a life threatening disease (please don't hate me for thinking like this I was jus so desperate) but he just offered to up my anti-depressants
I keep reading about people who have lost a lot of weight and wish I could do the same but I just don't seem to be able to - I guess I'm lazy.???
Can anyone please HELP as I just can't seem to help myself and even when I turn to the professionals they just don't seem bothered
I've got three beautiful children and a loving husband and so want to get back to being fit and healthy and looking better for it but something inside just won't seem to let me
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Replies
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I'm really sorry you feel this way. Maybe give the antidepressants a few weeks to kick in and weather permitting try to takes some walks. Fresh air and exercise will work wonders for your low mood and you will clock up a few calories as a bonus. I wish I could help you further, best of luck.0
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I highly suggest you read this:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants
In short, log everyday. Weigh your food.
You don't have to cut out anything or be super restrictive. You can still eat all of your favorite foods, but fit them into your calorie goal. If you feel your calorie goal is too low/hard to adhere to, then don't be scared to adjust it to a level you feel comfortable with. Doing these things has greatly helped me. I never binge because I get a healthy amount of calories, with the foods I crave/love.
We can give you advice, but we can't hold your hand and make you do anything. YOU have to take control of YOU and make the changes you need to make. And speaking from experience, an illness/life threatening disease won't make you change your eating habits either. Only you can do that.0 -
It sounds like you are desperate for help. You are at least doing something positive about your concern by posting and being on My fitness pal. Take a look at the WHY? you are eating, rather than what and how much you are eating.0
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I used to binge eat as well. I completely understand.
But I've always said binging and food addictions are just that - an addiction. You have to treat it like one, especially in the beginning. You have to want to do it, just like quitting smoking, except with food it's even harder because we can take ourselves away from the presence of smokers around us but we can't take food out of our life. Makes it more difficult! But you CAN do it. I did it. I was a pasta binge eater. I could eat a whole pound of pasta by myself when I weighed 320 lbs (my heaviest) I've lost 72 lbs now.
You just have to want to do it. You have to have focus and drive and it's not easy. It really isn't. I have PCOS and hypothyroidsim as well and I managed it. I know you can too! Just don't give up. You will make mistakes. Every day will be a new day though. Keep thinking about the good you ARE doing your body by making changes. Maybe even set a mantra of some sort to say EVERY morning. Something positive and changing for you!
Hang in there!0 -
How about seeing a therapist?0
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where are you? In some places you can self-refer to psych services if that is what you need. Or you can request a referral from your GP and they may send you to someone who specialises in eating disorders who will be able to tackle your problems more readily.
Things that help me with binges (am in recovery for bulimia):
EATING ENOUGH. Getting into the binge-starve cycle, or the binge-starve-purge cycle, is deadly and will worsen your attacks. You might feel guilty eating properly the next day but honestly, it's damage control.
EXERCISE. This is both an appetite suppressant (for me at least), something that keeps me busy when I could be eating, a reason to eat well (to nourish my body) and a mood booster (to prevent stress eating). Even just a 30 min walk can help.
EAT THE RIGHT FOODS. Find foods that satiate you better. By switching to wholegrains and eating more protein, I find that I'm more satiated. You need to find the correct balance for you, but eating more veggies/foods with a low calorie density might help to fill you up. Some people find that increasing their fat intake helps.
A POSITIVE ATTITUDE. Commit yourself to getting better! To every meal. I plan my meals whenever possible to keep myself on track and it helps to know that I'm nourishing my body. Food is not the enemy.
Good luck. Feel free to add me and hope things start to get better soon! It's good that you have a support network at home; perhaps it would be worth discussing your problems and how you plan to tackle them with those people.0 -
I just took a look and your diary and when you log, you seem to have a grasp on what needs to be done. I would try to find out what triggers your slide and fight that.
I too have three kids and I know that it can be difficult, but the best way I can say to keep going is have a support system and have a plan. In the mornings I plan out my meals for the day. I have my breakfast , lunch & dinner and 3 snacks. I take all but my dinner & night snack with me and that's all I eat. See if your husband will help with planning out the meals, Maybe he can diet along with you (or if he doesn't need to lose, he can eat the same foods you are). The only way to succeed on a diet is to find one that you can sustain. If you are miserable on it you won't be happy.
But you have to also control your slides. There are times I am in a funk and I'll want to sit down with a jar of PB and a spon and go crazy, but instead I have the PB to go (thanks Jif!) and instead of the jar I grab one of those. It'll satisfy me and won't be too much of a shot in the foot. My wife has her dessert every night and that's what keeps her going through the day. Everyone has a slip, but you have to control the slip, and more importantly, recover from it.
We all here want you to succeed and know that you can do it! You're not alone!0 -
A doctor won't get it. Especially if you have a male Doctor. I was a working mom, with a busy schedule and hubby barely helped with housework, I said sometimes I just wanna run away from it. He offered me antidepressants because not wanting to do housework is a sign of depression. I was Like um no just too much stuff to do.
I understand how you feel. Your problem may be that you are trying to limit your food too much. Sometimes when you make your choices too narrow, it makes you binge because you just want the junk. Also get all the trigger foods out of the house. Don't give me the bull your kids need cookies and potato chips because they shouldn't be eating them either. Sometimes as a treat yes, but there is no need to keep in house all the time. Keep healthy snacks available, make it easier for you to have good choices.
Also try keeping things that help curb the cravings a bit, like chocolate pudding cups, yogurt, graham crackers.
Don't hate yourself for binging, this is hard, I have been a bit out of control for a while too. I know I can do this, but its hard, really hard and I work a lot and I am a mom with a 19yo who stresses me out and I am pretty sure I am in Perimenopause and my hormones are a mess, but I can do this. YOU can do this. Make changes slowly, not all at once. Small slow steps are easier to maintain long term, YOU CAN do this.0 -
Contact the following:
http://eating-disorders.org.uk/
And they should be able to help.
If you want to try and deal with the issue yourself then "Brain Over Binge" by Kathryn Hansen or other self help books along those lines will help.
(edited: as saw you are in the UK rather than the US)0 -
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If seeing someone who is trained in helping someone with an eating disorder is out of the question and you want to self-help yourself through this (which is the hard way to do it) then make a commitment to yourself to educate yourself on binge eating and what you can do to begin normalizing your relationship with food. Its hard work to learn about what is happening to you and changing your own behavior which is why you should probably find someone who can help.
There are a couple of groups here on MFP to check out. There is a group for binge eaters and another for emotional eaters, both are full of very supportive people.
Hating yourself is a waste of time. If you want something different to happen, you have to do different things.0 -
Sweetheart, you are NOT alone in this! I am a binge eater from time to time as well...just gotta keep hitting restart each morning and choose TODAY will be a better day. Do you have a friend who can join you in your journey? I have more I could say, but would rather not post publicly. If you'd like, you can friend me and I'd love to at least join you in your journey via cyberspace!
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There is a group called Overeaters Anonymous. Www.oa.org. they have been my salvation. Look for a meeting in your local area. Good luck.0
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I just took a look and your diary and when you log, you seem to have a grasp on what needs to be done. I would try to find out what triggers your slide and fight that.
The triggers that set me off on a munchie craze/binge is bread... I avoid this and craving stops. I have replacedseems bread with ryvita crisp bread. seems to really help ...... And try to get at least 6-8 glasses of water through the day too.
Your not alone
Linn0 -
There is a Binge Eating Support group here on MFP:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/726-binge-eating-support-group
I def recommend you check it out and read through some of the other BED sufferers experiences. You are not alone. This dieting thing is great and all, hell it worked for me, but the good feelings you get from dieting and losing weight seem to have an expiry date for some...0 -
How about seeing a therapist?
This.0 -
your daily target of 1280 seem,s to low.are you trying to lose to quickly.a pound a week loss target is more realistic.i binge if i get hungry.especially in the evening.so i try to spread my calories over the full day.keep filling in your diary even if you had a bad day [i notice youve missed a couple of days]and look back when you get the urge to binge to encourage yourself.remember its not going to happen overnight.0
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A doctor won't get it. Especially if you have a male Doctor. I was a working mom, with a busy schedule and hubby barely helped with housework, I said sometimes I just wanna run away from it. He offered me antidepressants because not wanting to do housework is a sign of depression. I was Like um no just too much stuff to do.
I understand how you feel. Your problem may be that you are trying to limit your food too much. Sometimes when you make your choices too narrow, it makes you binge because you just want the junk. Also get all the trigger foods out of the house. Don't give me the bull your kids need cookies and potato chips because they shouldn't be eating them either. Sometimes as a treat yes, but there is no need to keep in house all the time. Keep healthy snacks available, make it easier for you to have good choices.
Also try keeping things that help curb the cravings a bit, like chocolate pudding cups, yogurt, graham crackers.
Don't hate yourself for binging, this is hard, I have been a bit out of control for a while too. I know I can do this, but its hard, really hard and I work a lot and I am a mom with a 19yo who stresses me out and I am pretty sure I am in Perimenopause and my hormones are a mess, but I can do this. YOU can do this. Make changes slowly, not all at once. Small slow steps are easier to maintain long term, YOU CAN do this.
+1
Additionally, maybe you're experiencing post partum depression. Your hormones are still in flux….are you breast-feeding too? Wacky hormone levels are very problematic. FOR ME, the anti-depressants caused side effects that added to my list of annoyances….lack of orgasms being tops on the list! :sad:
If you don't feel you have support from your family,,,ask for it, take time to exercise and make sure your MFP settings are providing enough calories to lessen a reason for bingeing.0 -
I second this (seeing a counselor)! It can really help you figure out what is causing the binging and ways to stop it0
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Contact the following:
http://eating-disorders.org.uk/
And they should be able to help.
If you want to try and deal with the issue yourself then "Brain Over Binge" by Kathryn Hansen or other self help books along those lines will help.
(edited: as saw you are in the UK rather than the US)
This, very much this!0 -
I'm so sorry you're stuck in such a rut. Someone very close to me is on anti-depressants so I know how hard it can be.
Have you ever thought about what triggers your binges? Is it a life event or certain situations, for example, when you get stressed or anxious?? If you can work out the triggers you can take steps to either avoid those situations, or find alternative coping mechanisms. For example, if stress makes you eat, rather than reach for the fridge, put on some of your favourite music and go for a walk to clear your mind and remove yourself from the situation. Also, have a think about you feel after your binges, like you feel now, and ask yourself if it's really worth it. You seem to be in a viscious cycle where you binge, get more depressed, which causes you to binge more.
It may be nothing to do with above, and may be more to do with your diet. Do you allow yourself 'treats'? Maybe a day where you don't log or go to your favourite restaurant, or eat that slice of cake you've been craving? You may be depriving your body and you get to the point where you can't take it anymore and binge on everything and anything.
Take some time out for yourself and think about it. You obviously want to change, hence why you posted on here, it's just taking that step. Do you have any friends or relatives that are also trying to lose weight? Having a good support network around you will help massively.
Good luck and I hope you come to a good conclusion :flowerforyou:0 -
Keep it simple at first. Do one thing. Just log your food. That's all.
Counting calories is just about being honest with yourself. Knowing what you're putting into your body. It's a tool.
So for right now don't worry about what you're eating, making big changes, anything. Just log it. It's for you, so you know what you're doing to your body. Once you see what you're eating you'll feel ready to start making changes all on your own. You'll have motivation and you'll want to make better choices for yourself.
So for right now, just log your food. One step will naturally lead to another. You just have to take that first, serious step.
:flowerforyou:
^^^^ This. When I long my binges it will slow me down and sometimes even stop me before I get to far.0 -
I too suffer from binge eating. I am starting to grasp saying no but I am still struggling. I received a huge sense of power when I was reading "Brain Over Binge", I have been side tracked with school recently and haven't been able to pick the book back up. I suggest reading this book it has awesome reviews from people who suffer from eating disorders (which binge eating is considered). Seriously pick up the book!
Do not hate yourself, like a fellow member said, being a binge eater is an addiction to food. We all have something we struggle with, you are not alone in this. Fell free to add me and I would be happy to offer support!0 -
It is such an addiction for some of us. When I binge eat, (and I still struggle with it) it fills a hole inside, kind of like scratching an itch. Another poster said you needed to try and stop hating yourself and that is so true. It can become a viscious cycle. A lot of us will binge because of self loathing. It has really helped me to realize that if I do slip up, its not the end of the world. I just carry on. If I slip up, and then give up, thats where the real problems starts.0
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Don't give up! Find something physical that you can do when you hit that wall, like a quick walk or a short yoga routine. Builds endorphines to help your mood and changes the direction that your brain is going. I've been on antidepresants for about 18 years, but the real difference in my moods happens when I get some exercise. Hang in there!:flowerforyou:0
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Congratulations on the birth of your daughter! Now for you. I looked at you diary and, as someone has mentioned, perhaps your calories are too low. With all you've got on your plate (forgive the pun), Losing .5 lbs a week would be a challenge. It's important that you don't slide backward--go slower. You might find it easier to control your hunger. This will be a long term thing. Then, and this will probably be hard--find time to exercise. Join a group if you can, even dancing, any movement is better than none. I suggest a group because usually friends will give you support. Please don't feel bad about this since we've all needed it at some point. If you can exercise it will be easier to meet your calorie goals. Then drink alot of water and try to get your rest. Best wishes and remember you're doing this for your family too--I hope they'll be supportive.0
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I suggest seeing a therapist as well. You need to figure out WHY you're binging or you're never going to stop. Food is not just food to people who binge or have food additions. You need to dig deep and figure out what your food really is to you and your brain.0
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You go from one extreme to the other mentally. It comes out in what you say:I keep trying to keep up with myfitness pal and I had lost just over 9lb but then something happens and I start bingeing and then I have triouble stopping I really hate the way I look and am and yet even that doesn't inspire me to carry on
I went to the docs and said I had a problem with food and wish something drastic would happen to force me to change my eating habits like getting a life threatening disease (please don't hate me for thinking like this I was jus so desperate) but he just offered to up my anti-depressants
I keep reading about people who have lost a lot of weight and wish I could do the same but I just don't seem to be able to - I guess I'm lazy.???
Can anyone please HELP as I just can't seem to help myself and even when I turn to the professionals they just don't seem bothered
I've got three beautiful children and a loving husband and so want to get back to being fit and healthy and looking better for it but something inside just won't seem to let me
"I hate my condition, but even that doesn't make me want to change"
"I want to be healthy, but need a fatal disease in order to make a change."
"I am different than anyone who has lost weight.....I can't lose weight."
"Losing weight takes effort, but I am lazy."
"Even professional help doesn't work."
Today, make progress. NO EXCUSES ALLOWED TODAY. Do this: Log your food. Drink water and log it. Do some form of exercise, anything. Log it.
You have to start somewhere and then make progress from there.0 -
I know the last thing you want to do when you're depressed is exercise but after I started regularly I found my depression and anxiety both lessened. Start with walking or if your kids have any of those computer dance games they can be fun and great for getting your heart rate up. Don't restrict too much, make sure you eat enough that you feel full and don't feel deprived of your favourite foods, set your calories to a 1 pound or half a pound a week loss. You can do it, and you are worth the effort x0
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