Do you tell friends and family?

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  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
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    I did eventually... It took me a month to tell my mom (I only see her 3 times a year), and she was happy I did it (and now pesters me because I'm too thin). My husband obviously I told the day I started. I didn't tell anyone else until I was down 40 lbs (but again, I don't have any friend really, just friends on FB).
  • weewdy
    weewdy Posts: 39
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    The only person that knows im trying to lose weight is my partner. Mostly the reason I haven't said to anyone is because I am ashamed that I have put this weight back on (I lost a lot of weight before I had my daughter).
  • MysteriousMerlin
    MysteriousMerlin Posts: 2,270 Member
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    My friends, coworkers, mom, sister and husband know. They are pretty supportive for the most part, though there are a couple who may possibly try subtle sabotage tactics, as I am usually the friend who matches them dessert for dessert.

    It doesn't stop me from hanging out with them, as I'm old enough to make my own decisions and control what goes in my pie hole.
  • Pirate_chick
    Pirate_chick Posts: 1,216 Member
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    My kid and parents know. I haven't said anything to anyone else. I just want them to notice.
  • supermysza
    supermysza Posts: 167 Member
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    They're the people I eat with so they know :wink:
    They're supportive in both ways - supporting my weight loss and making sure I don't overdo it
  • lilmisfit1987
    lilmisfit1987 Posts: 183 Member
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    Hell yes I tell everyone! I yell it loud and proud...my notifications for mfp go right to my facebook feed.

    Why wouldn't they be supportive? Honestly, if they're not going to support you and make rude comments, then they aren't much of a friend.
  • ezloshead
    ezloshead Posts: 167 Member
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    The last time I tried I told my mom and she made a point to say things like "Oh honey I got fruit for you because you're chubby!" and just pointing it out whenever she could. She's bad at not taking me seriously and just mocking me when I try to take steps forward in life. So this time i just haven't said anything and i feel so much better about it. I don't need the commentary.
  • salevy
    salevy Posts: 208 Member
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    I told my friends, families, and my coworkers. Big mistake.

    My mother wanted me on whatever her friends had success on. My husband told me nothing worked in the past and therefore nothing will work in the future. One brother said just do it. The other brother is supportive (only one) and his wife is trying to turn me into a vegetarian.

    All coworkers told me whatever I was having isn't on my diet. Didn't matter what I was having, whether it was a salad or something else. I said you don't know what's on my diet. They said it didn't matter what I was having, it wasn't allowed. I walked away from them. Someone passed my desk and saw what I had and said it wasn't allowed on my diet. A few minutes later I walked by her desk and told her what she had wasn't on her diet. She told me her diet was none of my business. I said then why is my diet any of yours and she agreed.

    All the negative support in the world.

    I found all the positive support I need online through the computer.

    Shari
  • walkinthedogs
    walkinthedogs Posts: 238 Member
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    My daughter is the only one, but that's cause she lives with me and knows my habits and can see the progress. I don't tell anyone mostly because I just don't think it's anybody's business nor do I think most people care about my eating/exercising and weight habits. I have had a few people make comments on either my weight loss or just that I look good and I say thank you and that's it. If they ask how I did it, I tell them I quit eating like a pig and try to move more and just eat reasonable amounts of food, which is how I've been doing it. Usually when you get to that part of to conversation, they want to tell you how you should be doing it and I just change the subject cause I really don't want to get into the fact that I do not feel it is necessary to call food bad or eliminate certain groups, that won't work for me and the conversation usually goes downhill, unless they are savvy eaters, then it ends there and we move on to more interesting subjects.
  • lilmisfit1987
    lilmisfit1987 Posts: 183 Member
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    I told my friends, families, and my coworkers. Big mistake.

    My mother wanted me on whatever her friends had success on. My husband told me nothing worked in the past and therefore nothing will work in the future. One brother said just do it. The other brother is supportive (only one) and his wife is trying to turn me into a vegetarian.

    All coworkers told me whatever I was having isn't on my diet. Didn't matter what I was having, whether it was a salad or something else. I said you don't know what's on my diet. They said it didn't matter what I was having, it wasn't allowed. I walked away from them. Someone passed my desk and saw what I had and said it wasn't allowed on my diet. A few minutes later I walked by her desk and told her what she had wasn't on her diet. She told me her diet was none of my business. I said then why is my diet any of yours and she agreed.

    All the negative support in the world.

    I found all the positive support I need online through the computer.

    Shari

    Wow! I'm really sorry you're having such a tough time, especially from your husband. :( But on the other hand, I'm glad you are able to find the support you need online! :)
  • walkinthedogs
    walkinthedogs Posts: 238 Member
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    I told my friends, families, and my coworkers. Big mistake.

    My mother wanted me on whatever her friends had success on. My husband told me nothing worked in the past and therefore nothing will work in the future. One brother said just do it. The other brother is supportive (only one) and his wife is trying to turn me into a vegetarian.

    All coworkers told me whatever I was having isn't on my diet. Didn't matter what I was having, whether it was a salad or something else. I said you don't know what's on my diet. They said it didn't matter what I was having, it wasn't allowed. I walked away from them. Someone passed my desk and saw what I had and said it wasn't allowed on my diet. A few minutes later I walked by her desk and told her what she had wasn't on her diet. She told me her diet was none of my business. I said then why is my diet any of yours and she agreed.

    All the negative support in the world.

    I found all the positive support I need online through the computer.

    Shari

    Those are the exact reasons I kept it to myself. Everyone wants to tell you what you should/should not eat and then comment on anything that passes your lips. It's really nobody's business IMO. Sorry you are going through that, it doesn't help and is highly annoying.
  • krennie8
    krennie8 Posts: 301 Member
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    I told one friend the first week, my mother and roommate the second, and then a few other people after about a month. I've told people the day of previously and they've almost always been my only diet day b/c I'm done shortly after. I figure I don't really need that extra pressure of having to live up to others expectations. Although I have a fear of failure, so there's that.

    But my friend, roommate, and mom are all also dieting (though only my roommate is really in abt the same place; my mother thinks she's more overweight than she is at 155, 5'5", and my friend is like 110, 4'10"). Based on BMI though I was obese (barely) when I started at 172, 5'3.5". We're all doing different things (me-MFP, mom-exercise, roommate-WW, friend-LoseIt) but it's nice to have a bit of a support system.
  • keem88
    keem88 Posts: 1,689 Member
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    i'm in a similar yet different situation about telling my family, but it's kind of in the other direction - i need to gain weight (i am in treatment for an eating disorder)
    I started treatment in October and I still have NO idea how to tell them, or if I even should! Anyone have any suggestions for that?

    As far as the losing weight, I would share with friends and family if they are the supportive type. Some family can be mean and not care, not sure how yours is so if they are supporitve people in general then go ahead and tell them, so you can share your progress and success with them!
  • mayaysf
    mayaysf Posts: 70 Member
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    Coming from a large latin family (aka, lots of food every day- rice and beans), it took me a while to explain to them that I'm eating less (or no) rice and more salad, protein shakes. they also thought i'd start working out and leave it right after a week. when they saw I was committed to it to a whole life style change, healthy eating and working out, not just diet. they've been very supportive. they've bought more veggies, they eat now more veggies than rice (most of the time), they don't offer me ice creams and sweets anymore, except on occasional family events when they ask me "can u have a cheat day today?". When I tell them about my Insanity workouts, they just shake their heads and say "u r INSANE" lol. even when im not losing weight but my body is changing, they keep saying how good I look. They are super excited that I'm starting the NROL4W now and keep asking me about the gym, what's the schedule, how I'm going to do it...

    My cousins just know I'm working out but no specifics, I did post on Facebook and told them that I'm working out to have an amazing body to be a nudist (kind of an inside joke obviously) but it keeps me accountable, and is funny when they see me changing or they ask me "so how close are u to become a nudist?". Now when I choose not to eat any junk they have around, they know why and don't even offer me, and they have started to eat far from me "so I don't angry at them" hahaha

    At work, that's a different story, they are always eating unhealthy food, drinking soda, eating chocolates and inviting me to join them. Then they come crying because they are gaining weight and their HCG, their diet pills, their body wraps are not working... I don't even bother educating them anymore. I just keep drinking my water and bringing lunch to work, and just eating better in general. Some of the girls ask me "how is insanity going?" , I just answer "good", then they say "Imma start diet and working out soon" (while eating a chocolates, and candies and drinking soda and all kinds of fried snacks). I haven't even told them I'm going to start weight lifting, they wouldn't understand.
  • prattiger65
    prattiger65 Posts: 1,657 Member
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    Sure, I tell anyone who asks.
  • will2lose72
    will2lose72 Posts: 128 Member
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    You know the saying about opinions...everyone's got one. If a 'bad' comment is going to derail you then don't tell anyone. In the end it is our mind set that needs to change not anyone else's. For me so far, I've lost this weight so slowly and over the wintertime when bigger clothes are covered up with a big jacket that no one has really noticed yet. And I'm ok with that. I see the number on the scale, the way my clothes are too big and that I'm fitting in to the smaller sizes in my closet. Just do you...no need to explain to anyone!
  • jkleon86
    jkleon86 Posts: 245 Member
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    I have family and other people that consider it a challenge to cause you to screw up when I'm trying to lose so I don't tell but a few now.
  • Natbaybee
    Natbaybee Posts: 12 Member
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    I told my husband and he decided to do it with me! :)

    But I will say that I have been very surprised at people's comments. Some of the peoeple I expected to be the most supportive (mom, sister, best friend) are the ones who have had the negative things to say and been less than supportive.

    But 2 of my other friends were extremely supportive and eventually impressed by my success. They have began to lose weight too....which I love!

    I think that its probably best not to broadcast it around. Once you make some progress, people will notice all on their own
  • beth4dieting3
    beth4dieting3 Posts: 80 Member
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    I went to the extreme because I wanted accountability and support. I have a blog and a Facebook site just about my weightloss. I can't tell you how important the support has been. I measure monthly and post my results. I have yet to have anyone give me negative feedback, even when I've slipped. It's a journey, not a diet and so I'm making my way slowly but surely. Good luck.
  • zyxst
    zyxst Posts: 9,135 Member
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    Why wouldn't you tell friends and family that you are trying to better yourself. It's nothing to be ashamed of.

    Because they usually turn into the Food Police. Here are the basic questions/statements:

    "Can you have that?"
    "Do you eat potatoes/rice/bacon/cheese/etc.?"
    "Oh, she doesn't eat cake/pie/ice cream/insert dessert here anymore."
    "Are you supposed to eat that?"

    My ILs and their friends are like this with me, MIL especially. My husband is absolutely bril about helping me keep on track.

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