rudest thing anyone has ever said about your weight?

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  • AmelieMustLoseWeight
    AmelieMustLoseWeight Posts: 180 Member
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    OP-you obviously have no clue how beautiful you are, but I bet the sister in law does...and secretly hates you for it, and tries to make herself look better by pointing out the one thing she thinks is wrong with you. Good Christian girl that one is! Definitely a keeper.

    I have found the stories therapeutic to read. I don't really have anything new to add. I teach high school and most of the time the students' "filters" are broken. I don't get angry any more. I don't get angry when my own kids say anything, and my husband thinks I'm beautiful. BUT our demons chase us...years of being told I'd be prettier if I were thin or getting turned down when I asked a guy out because of my weight really didn't help my self-esteem. Finally at almost 40 I am addressing this. It's a long hard road.

    My advice to young girls: beauty comes in ALL shapes, sizes and colors. Embrace your differences because those differences are what make you an individual. Self-confidence is WAY sexy at ANY weight!

    I am really glad I posted this thread. It seems like a lot of us have to blow off steam and talk about our experiences with being put down by others.

    It makes me feel sick to know that so many people are mistreated for superficial reasons. :\ In all honesty I know you can't win every battle and not everyone in life is going to like you. In fact, you will have people who will dislike you without you deserving it. ( racism, bigotry, etc) I guess the only thing we can do is focus on the people who do care for us and support us. The rest of the people who put us down can be as good as invisible I guess.

    I don't know about all of you on here but I don't have time or the space for negativity. Especially when it's someone else's negativity towards me that Isn't warranted.

    AABru, Thank you for the kind and insightful words. I agree I think these post are very therapeutic. All of us on here can now see that we are not alone when it comes to rude people making us feel bad about ourselves.

    I think the reason it takes us all a while to realize that we must love ourselves is because we truly have to come to that conclusion on our own. Until we feel it in our bones I guess it's not meaningful.
  • arcana7609
    arcana7609 Posts: 212 Member
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    I am 44 years old and have been fat since puberty. I have a giant laundry list of crap people have said to me over the years, but I don't dwell on it anymore. It caused a nervous breakdown when I was 18. I was in the hospital for about a month. I used to go over and over every cruel thing said to me. The best thing for me was getting the internet and after about the 50th time of telling my sad tale to a complete stranger I got sick of myself and my freaking whining.

    I started letting go of all of that mental garbage. It's a very liberating experience to let go of your anger and bitterness. That was the biggest weight I've ever lost. All this fat I have now is just fat. It can go or it can stay, I'm fine either way. :)
  • QueenE_
    QueenE_ Posts: 522 Member
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    My grandma would always comment on how heavy I was. But she was right, I was getting fat lol. Once I asked my husband if I was fat, his answer was pleasantly plump.
    Can't say that I can remember someone actually hurting my feelings with a weight comment though.
  • curiology
    curiology Posts: 15
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    I went from big after having my daughter to a UK size 8, when I got a lot of 'Have you been ill\oh no is it cancer\wow how do you stand on those stick legs? To then getting bigger and getting 'wow you looked way better small\what a shame you got fat again\did you have to throw away all your nice clothes? Now I'm going back down again I'm getting 'oh but then you'll look anorexic again! etc.

    Just can't win with some people!
  • LozPenguin
    LozPenguin Posts: 139 Member
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    Like I said I try to avoid her at all costs. Which sucks because my boyfriends family is very religious and different than me and my family so his brother was like the only one out of the family i knew liked me as a person. his mom and i fought so much because i was very secular and it freaked her out.

    idk. I hate going to family events because i make it obvious that i dont want to be near her and everyone looks at me like im the *kitten*. No one knows half of the rude things shes said to me.

    I think if you get fed-up enough fight fire with fire lol. She's insecure about you around her husband? Next time she makes a rude fat comment, just look over at her husband with a little smile and say 'god your husband's looking good lately though. Is he working out more or something?' and just wander away. Let her be the one to go home upset and constantly thinking about something for a change-I KNOW its immature and be the bigger person blah blah blah...but seriously, sometimes I feel like these spiteful rude people need someone giving them a taste of their own medicine! :wink: If that fails, pull her into your boat whenever she comments. Annoy her with constant comparisons. If she says 'that's good it'll give you less time to eat' just smile and say 'I know right, we could both use second jobs I reckon!' Throw everything she says back on her. If she disputes it just smile, or chuckle, look her in the eye and say nothing. It will drive her mental and maybe she'll learn to shut her trap.

    People like that just stay spiteful, they know exactly what they're doing, and it isn't a reflection on you-its all about her own issues. Work on your own self-confidence and compliment yourself at least once a day, just knowing where you stand with yourself and feeling happy with your body the best defense. Then you will find it easier to ignore her garbage (you don't really have to get all fire-with-fire with her lol. I know that's a tad pety; but I've found some people will just push and push until you push back. Then you realize how small they are, because they crumble when other people call them out on their behavior. Call her out! Don't let it slide, why should you have to obsess over it later? You can be the adult and just calmly respond with 'that's a very rude thing to say. I'm surprised you have such a bad attitude towards other people.' Try to do it without getting angry or upset, and just let her react how she wants. However she defends herself just say 'Well I don't appreciate it. That should be enough of a reason for you to keep your comments to yourself.' at least you will feel good later for sticking up for yourself.)
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
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    I would bet that there isn't a one of us who hasn't seen somebody really fat and thought exactly that " my God, they are fat and unattractive." We all know that being obese is not a state of healthiness but the visual always comes first and blurters, blurt and a-holes comment and parents worry and life goes on with or without us.

    It's one thing to think it, and quite another to rudely say it to someone's face.

    When you're overweight you internally insult yourself enough without having to take rude remarks from strangers too.

    I'm not sure of your point. Of course it's unbelievably callous of people to insult you, but chances are someone will and you have to learn how to deal with it emotionally.

    I agree. That doesn't give people the right to be rude though. :smile:

    I think we're all just marveling at how obnoxious others are.
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
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    My dad is VERY annoyed at my constant calorie counting but guess what, I lost 8 pounds, and he is now upset for gaining 8 pounds! Karma!...and bad eating lol. Since he can't fit in his pants anymore he has shut up about me and my mom.

    I am over here feeling happy for you. lol
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
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    I am 44 years old and have been fat since puberty. I have a giant laundry list of crap people have said to me over the years, but I don't dwell on it anymore. It caused a nervous breakdown when I was 18. I was in the hospital for about a month. I used to go over and over every cruel thing said to me. The best thing for me was getting the internet and after about the 50th time of telling my sad tale to a complete stranger I got sick of myself and my freaking whining.

    I started letting go of all of that mental garbage. It's a very liberating experience to let go of your anger and bitterness. That was the biggest weight I've ever lost. All this fat I have now is just fat. It can go or it can stay, I'm fine either way. :)

    Great attitude to have! I'd like to apply some of this myself.
  • Jen61885
    Jen61885 Posts: 4 Member
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    My Mom asked if I had gained weight while helping me try on my wedding dress. Still hurts....
  • JBcat123
    JBcat123 Posts: 211 Member
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    I was in the city with friends and had trouble catching up like walking getting out of breath and my friend was like " move your fat *kitten*, and I thought I was out of shape!" later he said " good thing you are on a diet, I wouldn't be so squished anymore!" UGH.
  • fuzilojak
    fuzilojak Posts: 269 Member
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    My previous boss told me my speed and quality would improve if I lost weight. I did art and animation for video games. :\

    I reply, "I gained the weight due to the stress and lack of sleep of working for you so I think this environment might be why I might not be performing at my best."
  • evastria
    evastria Posts: 30 Member
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    Wow, I feel like smacking those who have said horrible things to everyone in this forum about their weight! It is a low blow - used when someone can't think of anything else to say.

    I'll try to pick the most significant, but there had been a lot!

    I'm the youngest of three sisters and three female cousins, all extremely skinny. I was a chubby kid, and was constantly teased by all five of them, their favourite insult being "anon, why are you so fat and we're not?"
    My dad and grandad commenting that "she's putting on the weight" after not seeing them for five years (I was thirteen!)
    A group of college 'friends' all giggling hysterically because one noticed my belly folded when I sat down.

    Although I think the most hurtful has been from my mum. She's never meant to hurt me but she's always made hints that I was bigger than I should be, and that I should watch my weight which has always made me feel like a failure who can't take criticism. She's also a master of that phrase, "You look SO well!" ... Everyone knows what that means!
  • Chezzie84
    Chezzie84 Posts: 873 Member
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    I recently had an incident in a busy supermarket the other day.
    There was 3 young girls (about 16/17) behind me following me around the shop repeating over and over "oi fatty fatty fatty fatty fatty and ohhhh should you really be putting that in your basket?"
    The looks of disgust they were getting as I walked through the store was phenominal because they would turn and say it to other people too.
    I ignored them until I got to the most crowed part of the shop and then I let rip.
    I wont tell you what I said because it was horrible and I felt a little ashamed, until shoppers starting applauding.
    The girls look horrified and ran off.
  • evastria
    evastria Posts: 30 Member
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    Good on you Chezz! 16/17 is old enough to know how to behave!
  • detarrevo
    detarrevo Posts: 45
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    My dad is VERY annoyed at my constant calorie counting but guess what, I lost 8 pounds, and he is now upset for gaining 8 pounds! Karma!...and bad eating lol. Since he can't fit in his pants anymore he has shut up about me and my mom.

    I am over here feeling happy for you. lol

    Aw, thanks :D
  • TheLadyBane
    TheLadyBane Posts: 299 Member
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    After I gained amajority of my weight in my senior year I had people on the football teams harass me while I ran track. The main kid who messed with me was being such a **** so I drop kicked him and told him he could call me the juggernaut. (X men fan here)

    Needless to say its a name that stuck and I don't even mind.

    Hahahaha, this comment made my day. You are awesome:).
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
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    My previous boss told me my speed and quality would improve if I lost weight. I did art and animation for video games. :\

    I reply, "I gained the weight due to the stress and lack of sleep of working for you so I think this environment might be why I might not be performing at my best."

    awesomeness. What did he say?
  • detarrevo
    detarrevo Posts: 45
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    Last night after I read this post I went to bed actually thinking of all the time kids got on to me about my weight.
    So much of it I had blocked out over the years.

    I think the worst incident from my childhood would have to be from back in....I think it was 6th grade.
    Back then, that was probably the start of me actually being so self conscious about my weight.
    Of course I noticed I was bigger than most kids, but I was a kid! I didn't care! Until one day on the playground.....

    For whatever reason I was walking backwards while talking to a friend and a few seconds later I ran into this girl that was on her hands and knees in the dirt. I immediately apologized and asked if she was okay.
    She proceeded to call me a fat *** cow. Then her and her friend started throwing pinecones at my stomach.

    They eventually stopped because they didn't understand my laughing.
    I was only laughing because it tickled though, that day I was really hurting emotionally. And my friend had just run away when they started...
  • DaniMarie180
    DaniMarie180 Posts: 17
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    My Mom asked if I had gained weight while helping me try on my wedding dress. Still hurts....

    Oh, I'm so sorry. What a crap thing to say on such a special day. :angry:
    Hugs to you!
    :heart:
  • detarrevo
    detarrevo Posts: 45
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    My Mom asked if I had gained weight while helping me try on my wedding dress. Still hurts....

    Oh, I'm so sorry. What a crap thing to say on such a special day. :angry:
    Hugs to you!
    :heart:


    I'm also sorry.
    Weddings are so stressful as is! That was the last thing she should've brought up that day.

    I'm sure you looked beautiful though :)

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