Terrible Dates

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  • TheGymGypsy
    TheGymGypsy Posts: 1,023 Member
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    Met a girl and found out she didn't lift.So called her a taxi.

    Met a guy and found out he judged women by their exercise habits rather then their personality and intellect. Called him a taxi.
  • jackpotclown
    jackpotclown Posts: 3,291 Member
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    ."Well you didn't tell me I could get what I want".....what?....."and because you didn't I felt limited in my choices"......ummmmm, ok, I can call the waitress back and you can have whatever it is that you really want......"No, that's ok (scowl, grimace, snot snot LOL)

    Jeesh....dodged an insecure bullet with that one!

    SERIOUSLY. GOOD THING YOU GOT OUT THEN!

    Yeah, funny thing is she still wanted to be friends, so I said sure hey why not. She called me a week later wanting to hang out at the same bar we had met.......because she needed someone to buy her drinks......told her I was busy helping my friend at another location set up his DJ equipment for his gig that night.....she starts screaming on the phone what a loser I am, how pathetic etc etc and I just quickly told her off and hung up the phone......funny thing, the next year at valentine's day 103.5 Kiss FM had a "tell us about your worst date" segment for Valentine's Day....I called in, got through, told the whole story, but used a fake first name because I was somewhat worried she'd come find me
    \m/
  • ashutoshonline
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    I'll try to keep this short:

    I was young, 23 I think, and met this gal out at a club in downtown Jacksonville, FL. Turns out she is from my home state, she's hot, and she likes to dance with me. Also revealed, is that she's 34. Even though she fit description of "cougar," she honestly didn't have that demeanor about her. I got her number, and told her I'd like to take her out...

    The next week, we go out to dinner. She looks amazing. I'm feeling pretty good about myself, taking this much older woman out. We get seated at our table, and out of nowhere, this random dude sits down beside her and starts talking to her like I'm not even there...

    "Why are you doing this to me? Who is this guy? How old is he? Does he know we're married?"

    Um, DA *kitten*? :huh:

    He starts making her cry, and I tell him I don't know who he is, but he can kindly excuse himself or I'm going to have to remove him from the situation. He abides, and she is a wreck. I calm her down, and she explains that he is her psycho soon-to-be-ex-husband, and the divorce was still going through (he was contesting it). Apparently he had been stalking her for weeks.

    I don't blame her, but told her I wasn't in for the drama. Told her to call me once she legally got things in order, if she cared to. As I'm leaving, she says, "Be sure to be careful who is following you home. He might try to follow you."

    I slept with a baseball bat for the next week. :laugh:

    Ha! nice one mate. Should have just beta him. Like If you did the word-for-word thing with a solid conviction on your face.
    Bloke: Who is this guy?
    You: Yeah who is this guy?
    Bloke: Does he know we are married?
    You: Does he know we are married?
    Bloke: What the ****?
    You: are you the uncle jack she told me about?
    So on..until you finally asked him to leave like you did. If pulled off without showing any attachment to the outcome, the lady was yours forever.
    Although I am not so sure how 'psycho' you actually mean or weather that would have increased the chances of him following you home. My experience, if he was actually a man of any guts, he wouldn't chase women around. And barking dogs seldom bite.
  • MiloBloom83
    MiloBloom83 Posts: 2,724 Member
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    I got clocked in the face a couple weeks ago.


    I hope you meant for that "l" to be there...
  • Serenitytoo
    Serenitytoo Posts: 449 Member
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    I had a couple back when I was dong the online dating thing.

    I had one that seemed nice enough so we agreed to meet for coffee, but he suggested tim hortons so we could have lunch instead of just coffee at Starbucks. I showed up and he was there in a ripped t-shirt and track pants already eating. He appologized and said he had planned to be finished before I got there... :noway: he thought a 2 block walk we took was the most exercise he had had in months... I really didn't need someone less active than me.

    Another started the date by bashing my brother who he had worked with, then discussed hermaphrodites (and the naked hermaphrodite stripper he saw one summer floating in the channel) and then moved on to how it was no fair that all the mean people he knew in school got what he wanted, a family, kids, good job... and then was very rude to a tourist that interrupted us to ask for directions.
  • Galatea_Stone
    Galatea_Stone Posts: 2,037 Member
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    I have only had a couple bad dates. Unfortunately, I was the bad part of the date.

    Many years ago, right after a horrible break-up, I tried dating. One particular guy, a very nice guy, I met in a group while out dancing with friends. A friend of mine had gotten completely wasted, and I hadn't been drinking, so I needed to drive her home at around 10 pm. He was kind enough to help me carry her to my car and get her home. After that, we ended up chatting in a sports bar for a couple hours and I had a couple drinks. I think vodka tonic, but this is well over a decade ago, and I don't really remember. Well, I hadn't had anything to eat at all that day and I'm hypoglycemic. I kind of went into a low blood sugar "shock" and was becoming belligerent, so he needed to get me out of there. This very nice guy didn't have his car with him, had no idea who I was and no idea that I had a medical condition that caused me to occasionally act like an insane person. He takes me to his house. I start yelling at him to get me milk or juice or anything and I don't really have a whole lot of memory of what happened after that.

    I woke up fully clothed in the master bedroom. There was vomit on my shirt, and the guy was nowhere to be found. I ended up finding him in another bedroom. He wasn't happy to see me, but I told him about how I hadn't eaten anything, how I sometimes have a low blood sugar reaction that makes me act strange, and begged for an apology. He told me that I was belligerent and crying and when he tried to give me some OJ, I kind of threw it at him and started vomiting. He figured I was piss drunk and put me in a guest room while he cleaned up my vomit. Then I got up and went into the master bedroom and got sick again.

    The guy made me something to eat and when I felt better, I drove home. I made a joke that after that, I was pretty sure I'd never hear from him again.

    We dated for about a month after that, but it didn't work out. He was such a nice guy, but I was still majorly hung up on my ex, and it was impossible to move on.
  • tmm_0127
    tmm_0127 Posts: 545 Member
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    Had a guy pull the "oh I forgot my card in my other wallet" bs on me.
  • andielyn
    andielyn Posts: 233 Member
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    I had so many bad dates that I seriously thought about writing a book about them all. I'd tell my sister (mistake) and then they would become the topic at holiday dinners, brought up by her, of course..."oh yeah, remember the one that..." :ohwell:
  • digitalbill
    digitalbill Posts: 1,410 Member
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    OMG, which one should we discuss now.... well let's talk about the guy who had absolutely nothing original to say. In the 2 hours we were together he told me the same story about his daughter and ex-wife at least 4 times! Showed me the same picture of his house in Maine at least twice, and talked about how he was getting ready to leave the Navy (retirement time) and get a job where he currently worked at least a dozen times!

    He ate half my dinner, drank my glass of water... and then when we were getting ready to leave (thank God we drove separately I never let someone know where I live if I'm unsure of them), he made his move.... mouth wide open and tongue half out of his mouth! It is exactly how I imagine a St. Bernard would kiss!!!!

    As I'm pulling out, I noticed that it looked like he was following me.... (according to what he'd said earlier, he lived in the opposite direction from me). I pulled into the Sheetz along the way, and so did he.... I got gas, he just sat there in his parked car. So I then stopped at my fav local watering hole to talk to a friend of mine (the bouncer there) because I just didn't like the feeling I was getting.... by the time I got to my friend I had a text from this guy asking why I wasn't going home! Needless to say, I stayed there with my friend for a bit, then he followed me home to make sure the guy was gone! Holy hell!

    I hadn't seen this guy since that night... then this past weekend he showed up at my watering hole and tried to spark up a conversation. Thank God my friend was working and "escorted" the guy out the door :wink: UGH.
    FWIW, you look EXACTLY like my Ex-wife.
  • KrazyDaizy
    KrazyDaizy Posts: 815 Member
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    This one time when I was 18 I went on a date with a guy that got really drunk and threw up all over the place after wrecking my car.




    I married him 4 years later. True story. :flowerforyou:
  • accebersmith
    accebersmith Posts: 96 Member
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    Double date with a friend in high school. I knew she'd been dating her guy for a while, and sort of assumed my date would be a friend of his. Instead, it was her 26 year-old cousin, who did nothing but talk about knives all night (Freudian much?). I was so stressed out, I wound up breaking out in hives once he dropped me off at home.
  • TX_Rhon
    TX_Rhon Posts: 1,549 Member
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    I had a date who showed up wearing his wedding band. He stated his 22 yr old daughter, who lives with him, cannot comes to terms with her parents divorce so he still wears it. Luckily the sushi was de-lish so the date was a wash, ha!

    He later sent me a pic of his hand without the ring stating he wouldn't wear it next time. But he would have to wear when he got home. I sent him a text in return telling him to call me when he is ready to stop wearing it.

    My last date was much better. Win some, lose some!
  • Snow3y
    Snow3y Posts: 1,412 Member
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    Well... The day I asked her out, she laughed.

    3 years later we're together, turns out she just had anxiety and she giggled under shocked situations.
  • moviestarsara
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    In because I plan on dating again soon and these stories are crazy!
  • monkeywizard
    monkeywizard Posts: 222 Member
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    I threw your sammich at you.....my bulky arms must've caused me to throw harder than a woman should. You know, since I lift more than a sammich weighs....

    I should hope so, Irons, Pots & Pans aren't light!
  • Slacker16
    Slacker16 Posts: 1,184 Member
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    I don't know if it counts as a date, but one time back in undergrad I had made plans to go to a bar with some girl from class.

    A few days later I was home when she texts "Where are you?" I ask her what she meant and she told me we were supposed to have a date. I replied that the date was on Thursday and she texted back that we were Thursday...

    She was right, too. The reschedule never happened.
    Guy shows up in a dirty T-shirt with a ripped flannel over it. . . I'm not sure he showered that day. Took me to Old Country Buffet as some big treat, so we could both get exactly what we wanted.
    (...)
    I couldn't get out of there fast enough. . . .
    :cry: You said you liked me, you were just to busy to date!
  • MissAnjy
    MissAnjy Posts: 2,480 Member
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    My first experience with online dating after my divorce (2.5 years ago) was TERRIBLE.

    I started talking to this guy from online and because I was extremely cautious, we texted for about 3 weeks before meeting.

    We end up going to this fancy restaurant and all is well until he says that he needs to "tell me something".

    He proceeds to tell me that he is an ex-convict that did 3 years in an American prison for being a drug mule in a drug bust that I saw happen on CNN a few years prior. Oh, should I mention we had already discussed how much I loathed drugs and people who did them? Yeah....anyways, I thought he was joking so I'm sitting there laughing like....right bud, when I look at his face and realize he's for serious. The waitress comes up to the table right as i'm realizing this and so after he orders I say "just a bottle of wine for me thanks". He then starts talking to me about his ex-girlfriend who is pregnant....but not to worry, it's not his. It's actually hers and some "quarter black guy" (yup, he's RACIST too, great) and they had apparently had shower sex which resulted in her pregnancy. I clearly needed to know this information to survive. He then goes on to tell me that her vagina is 2cm dialated and she gives him constant updates on her vaginal status. PERFECT? It kind of goes silent for awhile and then he pipes up with "okay so I really like you, but you can't come to my house for at least another couple weeks because my other ex-gf still lives there. She is still hung up on me and I can't get her to move out but i'm just going to throw her things in the driveway and hope for the best. After that, you're free to come by whenever you want"............yeah, no thanks.

    I really don't think online dating is for me anymore lol
  • Tasseled26
    Tasseled26 Posts: 3 Member
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    Not really a date, but I had once the most weird, awkward experience with this one guy who tried hitting on me. I was working at a store then, and he would come in regularly to chat and ask me for my number. He was quite older than me (probably about 20 years older), so his motives clearly didn't include a meaningful relationship. I was a bit creeped out by his persistence, but he was a customer, so I would just politely decline and change the subject. One day he started telling me how he could take me out to any restaurant I wanted, that he'd take care of me really good and buy me whatever I wanted, all in exchange for "some company". He went on and on saying how it's no crime for two adults to have a "pleasant time together". I finally had enough and lied to him that my boyfriend would not appreciate me going for dinner with another man (I was single then, but I thought he'd take the hint and leave me be). He blew me away with, It's okay he can join us too...

    :noway: Needless to say, after I lost my temper and told him to get out, I never saw him again. That was so weird :sick:
  • Tasseled26
    Tasseled26 Posts: 3 Member
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    My first experience with online dating after my divorce (2.5 years ago) was TERRIBLE.

    I started talking to this guy from online and because I was extremely cautious, we texted for about 3 weeks before meeting.

    We end up going to this fancy restaurant and all is well until he says that he needs to "tell me something".

    He proceeds to tell me that he is an ex-convict that did 3 years in an American prison for being a drug mule in a drug bust that I saw happen on CNN a few years prior. Oh, should I mention we had already discussed how much I loathed drugs and people who did them? Yeah....anyways, I thought he was joking so I'm sitting there laughing like....right bud, when I look at his face and realize he's for serious. The waitress comes up to the table right as i'm realizing this and so after he orders I say "just a bottle of wine for me thanks". He then starts talking to me about his ex-girlfriend who is pregnant....but not to worry, it's not his. It's actually hers and some "quarter black guy" (yup, he's RACIST too, great) and they had apparently had shower sex which resulted in her pregnancy. I clearly needed to know this information to survive. He then goes on to tell me that her vagina is 2cm dialated and she gives him constant updates on her vaginal status. PERFECT? It kind of goes silent for awhile and then he pipes up with "okay so I really like you, but you can't come to my house for at least another couple weeks because my other ex-gf still lives there. She is still hung up on me and I can't get her to move out but i'm just going to throw her things in the driveway and hope for the best. After that, you're free to come by whenever you want"............yeah, no thanks.

    I really don't think online dating is for me anymore lol

    Oh my... that sounds so bad. At least you can laugh about it now!
  • TheGymGypsy
    TheGymGypsy Posts: 1,023 Member
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    Not really a date, but I had once the most weird, awkward experience with this one guy who tried hitting on me. I was working at a store then, and he would come in regularly to chat and ask me for my number. He was quite older than me (probably about 20 years older), so his motives clearly didn't include a meaningful relationship. I was a bit creeped out by his persistence, but he was a customer, so I would just politely decline and change the subject. One day he started telling me how he could take me out to any restaurant I wanted, that he'd take care of me really good and buy me whatever I wanted, all in exchange for "some company". He went on and on saying how it's no crime for two adults to have a "pleasant time together". I finally had enough and lied to him that my boyfriend would not appreciate me going for dinner with another man (I was single then, but I thought he'd take the hint and leave me be). He blew me away with, It's okay he can join us too...

    :noway: Needless to say, after I lost my temper and told him to get out, I never saw him again. That was so weird :sick:

    Haha I think that guy has come to my work too!