Weight loss FEARS?

13

Replies

  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    I have some excess skin but about 6-8 months ago, I was FAR more worried about it than I am now. When I lost weight in the beginning my face went through a phase of looking rather pinched and the skin on my neck looked loose and turkey like making me look a lot older very drastically/sudden...totally wigged me out, but within a few months of continued loss my face began to look fuller and normal again! Yay. I don't think the skin on my belly, thighs, or arms looked any worse then, but it just kind of appeared overnight or I just suddenly noticed it, and I was like "holy moly...maybe I should stop losing". I am really glad I didn't because that was when I was around 220 lb and now I'm at 187 and like my figure much better now even though the loose/excess skin hasn't changed. It hasn't changed for the worse so I'm okay with it...and now that I am getting fairly close to my planned goal of about 170, I feel more comfortable with my changing body and I don't think I am going to wake up a few months from now as a big bag of wrinkly skin ;-)
  • mestiza91
    mestiza91 Posts: 51
    im a b cup, so im so afraid of losing them. also i dont want to lose my bum! but want to slim my thighs. so hard :(
  • _Resolve_
    _Resolve_ Posts: 735 Member
    Id like to add another spin to this thread and offer what I feared and what the reality is, maybe encourage some of you. I was scared of the loose skin, I have some but certainly not as much as I thought I would. I feared I would still look in the mirror and be unhappy with who I am, the reality is I don't know who I am anymore. Its exciting to meet this new person you become and learn about yourself, its not an overnight kind of thing it will take a while to accept who you are after weight loss. I was scared of having to buy all new clothes, yup... lots and lots of clothes.. eventually I started buying really cheap jeans and t-shirts to just get me by until I landed at the size I was going to stay at. I have spent hundreds of dollars going from a size 54 pants to now 36 and I am happy to say I am finally at the size I will be at (at least for a while). I was scared that people would treat me different, and they do but I learned who my real friends were and who were the ones that would be left behind as I start to figure all of this out.

    All of the fears you have you and you alone will have to face, but I can guarantee they are all just part of the lesson to be learned and everyday a new piece to the puzzle fits. Its exciting! You are all working extremely hard to make HUGE changes in your life, the things you fear will keep you motivated..

    Hope this helps a little. :smile:
  • dym123
    dym123 Posts: 1,670 Member
    I fear I'll be too hot and men will be too intimidated by my hotness.
  • cinziaasq
    cinziaasq Posts: 1
    this is why you need to LIFT WEIGHTS! I lost 75 pounds and was very slim and still didn't like my body.. now that I have been lifting heavy for the past year I can honestly say that I love my body. You need to eat right and lift heavy weights with minimal cardio. By doing this you will build muscle and that will help with tightening your skin. Just have patience and your body will evolve. You can sculpt your body into whatever you want.. you just need to work hard.. it doesn't come easy. Also, BE PROUD of your accomplishments! You look amazing for your weight loss.. be proud of your journey if you haven't reached your goal yet.. by stressing out about it you will just raise your cortisol levels which will then lead to weight gain. BE CONFIDENT AND PROUD OF YOUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS
  • SymphonynSonata
    SymphonynSonata Posts: 533 Member
    Not being able to maintain it.
  • courtney3988
    courtney3988 Posts: 999 Member
    I am afraid of gaining it all back again. I do not want to be that person again. I want kids in the future but i am afraid if i do that i will become obesed again. I am very OCD about my calorie intake i watch every thing i hate going over.
  • knitapeace
    knitapeace Posts: 1,013 Member
    Id like to add another spin to this thread and offer what I feared and what the reality is, maybe encourage some of you. I was scared of the loose skin, I have some but certainly not as much as I thought I would. I feared I would still look in the mirror and be unhappy with who I am, the reality is I don't know who I am anymore. Its exciting to meet this new person you become and learn about yourself, its not an overnight kind of thing it will take a while to accept who you are after weight loss. I was scared of having to buy all new clothes, yup... lots and lots of clothes.. eventually I started buying really cheap jeans and t-shirts to just get me by until I landed at the size I was going to stay at. I have spent hundreds of dollars going from a size 54 pants to now 36 and I am happy to say I am finally at the size I will be at (at least for a while). I was scared that people would treat me different, and they do but I learned who my real friends were and who were the ones that would be left behind as I start to figure all of this out.

    All of the fears you have you and you alone will have to face, but I can guarantee they are all just part of the lesson to be learned and everyday a new piece to the puzzle fits. Its exciting! You are all working extremely hard to make HUGE changes in your life, the things you fear will keep you motivated..

    Hope this helps a little. :smile:

    That was an incredibly sweet post. :flowerforyou:
  • kilsafari
    kilsafari Posts: 61
    That I'll get to my goal weight and it won't be enough for me,. That I'll lose control and go too far. That I'll end up hating myself for not being happy and then gain it all back.
  • MsJulesRenee
    MsJulesRenee Posts: 1,180 Member
    Afraid of my friends treating me differently during and when I lose the weight. Sounds bad but I don't want them to be jealous or anything. I try as hard as I can to give them pointers about how to do it themselves but..ya know..They usually take it the wrong way and don't want to put the effort in. I always invite them to go to the gym with me but no one wants to wake up early.
    Makes me feel bad when I talk about it, but I like talking about fitness! They don't understand that all you have to do is change your lifestyle a little.
  • scraver2003
    scraver2003 Posts: 526 Member
    I am afraid of everything.

    I am afraid of loose skin. I am afraid of failing (again). I am afraid of suceeding. I am afraid of the emotions I will face. I am afraid of the emotions I am already facing. I am afraid my dealing with my emotions may take a toll on my family and friends. I am afraid of not having fat to hide behind. I am afraid I will lose the weight and still be a slow runner. I am afraid of how long it will take me to lose 90 pounds. I am afraid of losing some and gaining it all back again. I am afraid of the fact that I cannot picture myself as a thinner person.

    I am so very, very afraid. But I am so thankful for this thread... for having the opportunity to put in to words my fears.

    OP - Thank you. :flowerforyou:
  • MrsB123111
    MrsB123111 Posts: 535 Member
    this is why you need to LIFT WEIGHTS! I lost 75 pounds and was very slim and still didn't like my body.. now that I have been lifting heavy for the past year I can honestly say that I love my body. You need to eat right and lift heavy weights with minimal cardio. By doing this you will build muscle and that will help with tightening your skin. Just have patience and your body will evolve. You can sculpt your body into whatever you want.. you just need to work hard.. it doesn't come easy. Also, BE PROUD of your accomplishments! You look amazing for your weight loss.. be proud of your journey if you haven't reached your goal yet.. by stressing out about it you will just raise your cortisol levels which will then lead to weight gain. BE CONFIDENT AND PROUD OF YOUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS

    This. I was a total cardio "bunny" while I lost my first 100 pounds, and still hated the way I looked. 4 months of lifting weights has changed my body completely and I love what it's done for me!!!
  • laineybz
    laineybz Posts: 704 Member
    Do you have any weight loss fears? Like example some women fear that they will lost their breast size during weight loss. (this used to be one of mine)

    I was actually pleased with going down in size lol
  • krennie8
    krennie8 Posts: 301 Member
    Do you have any weight loss fears? Like example some women fear that they will lost their breast size during weight loss. (this used to be one of mine)

    I've always had a fear of getting an eating disorder. All those lifetime movies & lectures in high school (not to mention the people I knew who DID have them) really freaked me out.

    Also just a general fear of losing that "protection" b/c that's really what it was for me for a long time. And in some ways it made me feel like by being overweight I was being a "rebel" and "non-conformist". Yeah, not so much truth in that.
  • Shelley6591
    Shelley6591 Posts: 156 Member
    Do you have any weight loss fears? Like example some women fear that they will lost their breast size during weight loss. (this used to be one of mine)

    I've always had a fear of getting an eating disorder. All those lifetime movies & lectures in high school (not to mention the people I knew who DID have them) really freaked me out.

    Also just a general fear of losing that "protection" b/c that's really what it was for me for a long time. And in some ways it made me feel like by being overweight I was being a "rebel" and "non-conformist". Yeah, not so much truth in that.

    Pretty sure an over 'eating disorder' is what got most of us here in the first place :frown:
  • hyenagirl
    hyenagirl Posts: 206 Member
    I lift weights throughout losing the fat and skin hangs off of me. I look like a shar pei when I sit down. My boobs are all deflated, they're like veiny, deflated balloons. The fat that is left all hangs off my butt with my skin. Not pretty. When I run, loose skin jiggles and flies everywhere. When I sit, my thighs and butt pool out around me. I look at this as a reminder of when I was fat, this is the price I pay for every soda I drank, for every doughnut I devoured.

    Now onto the good: my joints don't hurt as much. I'm not as stiff as I used to be (my joints were always stiff, since I was 7). I can do more push ups than my SO (though, he can run faster than me). I can jump from high places and use my lose skin to make a parachute. No need to bring a tent for camping. I just hang some of my skin over myself, and bam- instant tent.
  • hospitablegirl
    hospitablegirl Posts: 64 Member
    My biggest fear is that my goal weight is too low. I won't achieve it or I will and I'll look gaunt.
  • _HeartsOnFire_
    _HeartsOnFire_ Posts: 5,304 Member
    Do you have any weight loss fears? Like example some women fear that they will lost their breast size during weight loss. (this used to be one of mine)

    That wasn't a fear of mine, it was a reality. Sucked. I liked my girls.
  • spdoughe
    spdoughe Posts: 51
    I'm scared that I'll reach my goal weight and still hate the way I look.

    Agreed.
    I'm afraid my stretch marks wont be any less subtle. I'm afraid of loose skin and im afraid my boobs won't shrink (yes, I want them smaller!)
  • tworthen79
    tworthen79 Posts: 1,173 Member
    That no matter how low the scale gets, I will still hate my body. I will over critique it and never be satisfied.
  • JessG11
    JessG11 Posts: 345 Member
    Id like to add another spin to this thread and offer what I feared and what the reality is, maybe encourage some of you. I was scared of the loose skin, I have some but certainly not as much as I thought I would. I feared I would still look in the mirror and be unhappy with who I am, the reality is I don't know who I am anymore. Its exciting to meet this new person you become and learn about yourself, its not an overnight kind of thing it will take a while to accept who you are after weight loss. I was scared of having to buy all new clothes, yup... lots and lots of clothes.. eventually I started buying really cheap jeans and t-shirts to just get me by until I landed at the size I was going to stay at. I have spent hundreds of dollars going from a size 54 pants to now 36 and I am happy to say I am finally at the size I will be at (at least for a while). I was scared that people would treat me different, and they do but I learned who my real friends were and who were the ones that would be left behind as I start to figure all of this out.

    All of the fears you have you and you alone will have to face, but I can guarantee they are all just part of the lesson to be learned and everyday a new piece to the puzzle fits. Its exciting! You are all working extremely hard to make HUGE changes in your life, the things you fear will keep you motivated..

    Hope this helps a little. :smile:

    It does! Thank you for this post!
  • motofairy
    motofairy Posts: 33 Member
    I'm afraid of losing the armor that my fat gives me. I will feel visible and vulnerable without it. I guess I should say that I'm afraid I won't have completed the emotional work in time to catch up with the physical work and I will be distressed and stall my progress.
  • Kevalicious99
    Kevalicious99 Posts: 1,131 Member
    My biggest fear was that I would look terrible at my goal weight .. well I am there and am pretty happy with where I am now. I have never been fitter in my adult years and I still want to lose a couple inches off my abs still, but overall I am pretty happy. I am not scared and disgusted at what I see in the mirror now. That is priceless.

    So .. just do it. It is worth making the effort. ;-)
  • jessspurr
    jessspurr Posts: 258 Member
    My biggest fear right now is quitting/gaining because I'm just starting out, but looking ahead to my future 150lb self, I agree that I worry about small things like loose skin (even looser and jigglier than it is now, post-baby). I also worry about people saying I looked like crap before (i.e now), even if they mean it in a nice way.

    I am mostly terrified that I will get to my goal weight and someone will say/imply that me being 218lbs was the reason my daughter was stillborn. I worry even more that a Doctor will say it. I know they won't (we already have theories/a diagnosis), so it's irrational, but it's really scary. I do not know what I would do.

    This is really profound. I have no words for you except I'm sorry and I hope you can release that fear in the near future. That is a really big thing to carry. Love and healing thoughts to you!
  • jessspurr
    jessspurr Posts: 258 Member
    I'm in the "fat armor" camp. I'm incredibly uncomfortable with attention (even though I kind of like it at the same time, but it's this major psychological dichotomy) and even though I still have a lot of weight to loose I've noticed an increase in attention (not just from men, but even women who want to be friends with me, people striking up conversations, smiling at me, etc.) and after hiding behind massive amounts of fat for so long it's really hard to accept people's kindness and interest in me because I have felt so undeserving for so long. Really I started putting my weight on right after I met my husband and I have this theory that I did it subconsciously to test him. To see if he would still love me if I was fat. He passed the test with flying colors. Never said a single word about my weight. He is a really good man. Every day I have fears. A lot of my fears have already been mentioned in this post, but I think dwelling on those fears gives me an excuse to not continue moving forward so I don't dwell!
  • jwhackers84
    jwhackers84 Posts: 43 Member
    I fear failure. I fear that I will never make it to my goal weight. That I won't be able to maintain the loss, if I do make it. I fear loose skin. I fear that I will lose people as I progress through this weight loss journey and lifestyle change. And I fear that I will never truly be happy with my weight.

    But you know what I fear more? Staying the way I am. The risk of all sorts of weight related health problems. Not getting to see my children grow up. Not being the healthiest me I can be.
  • DayByDayGetStronger
    DayByDayGetStronger Posts: 108 Member
    I feared being under 200lbs but was not admitting it to myself. I sabotaged my weight loss for about a year and maintained at 201/204 blaming it on everything else but the real reason.
    My therapist helped me get over the hurdle and the 190's came and I was over my fear, but my god did it take a LOT of weekly sessions (about 1 year).

    For those who fear loose skin: I did too and HATED MY FLAPPY, DEFLATED BODY even though I was 70lbs lighter. I couldn't wear button down shirts b/c my arms wouldn't fit. I had to wear stretch fabric for everything. My belly flab hung over my waistband and I don't even want to talk about the foreign mass between my thighs. Oye!

    Plastic surgery was the cure. I got a body lift and brachioplasty in the same procedure. The surgeon removed 15lbs of skin and flab. I had my eyelids lifted in January and my neck/lower face lift done about 12 days ago. In January 2015 I will have my thighplasty and breast lift along with the "bra bulge" in my armpit removed.

    Total price $34,000 for everything. I live in suburbs of Los Angeles and from my research interviewing different surgeon around LA and Orange County, this is VERY reasonable. If anyone would like my surgeon's name: Martin O'Toole in Pasadena. He's a wonderful, wonderful surgeon and I'm so pleased with the outcomes. But it's VERY hard emotionally to do these surgeries. If you think it's expensive to stay with flabby skin, just think about this for a minute. A brand new car costs about $34k and you'll have this lovely tight skin for as long as you keep it up.

    Start saving your money now as you being your weight loss journey. You'll need some contouring SOMEWHERE on your body even if you're young and do weight training. The skin just doesn't come back the way you want it to no matter how hard you try.

    Do I think it's worth the pain and money? Hell YES. When I ride my bike, my belly flap doesn't rest on my thighs anymore. I can fit into clothes SOOO easily now. It's amazing how 15 little pounds of skin removed looked like I lost 40lbs. Now that my face and neck are done people say I look 10 years younger and I'm only 43. I love the compliments and I love not having my skin "pool" when I lie flat in my bed.
  • krennie8
    krennie8 Posts: 301 Member
    Do you have any weight loss fears? Like example some women fear that they will lost their breast size during weight loss. (this used to be one of mine)

    I've always had a fear of getting an eating disorder. All those lifetime movies & lectures in high school (not to mention the people I knew who DID have them) really freaked me out.

    Also just a general fear of losing that "protection" b/c that's really what it was for me for a long time. And in some ways it made me feel like by being overweight I was being a "rebel" and "non-conformist". Yeah, not so much truth in that.

    Pretty sure an over 'eating disorder' is what got most of us here in the first place :frown:

    True. But they don't generally make Lifetime movies about overeating or give lectures about not gaining too much weight in high school. Though I WISH they did! :)
  • brookielaw
    brookielaw Posts: 814 Member
    I'm afraid of gaining it back. Based upon patterns in my life from the past, it's a legitimate fear, although I have never lost this much before and always lost by dieting. I'm not dieting now.

    I'm afraid I'll never get to my goal, or by some freak twist of fate that I will be miserable when I do.

    Most of all I am afraid that that d---head doctor who told me in 1997 that I would never be under 200 lbs was right....but I guess I'l find out in about 15-20 lbs.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    That my tummy will never look like it did pre-kid. Which is why I'm bulking and trying to put on muscle mass.

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