Things People Say When You've Lost Weight

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Replies

  • nainai0585
    nainai0585 Posts: 199 Member
    This was said to me out of the blue, by a morbidly obese cousin who suddenly dispised me when I began loosing weight (but she was fine with me when I was obese)

    Cousin - "You need to gain weight. Your collar bone is showing and that obviously means you anorexic. You look gross." - I had just reached maintenance and was 135 lbs.
    Me - "When you COULDN'T see my collar bones, my doctor stated that I needed to loose weight as I was OBESE. Now that I am at a HEALTHY weight for my height, you can see my colllar bones, and my doctor is VERY happy with my weight."
    Cousin - "Its still disgusting."
    Me - I REALLY ticked her off with this comment, thankfully seen weeks earlier on this forum, "My body, my rules."

    Another "talk" with this same cousin months earlier while I was still in the "loosing" phase of my journey:
    Cousin - "You know, I'm not fat. I'm big boned so that's why I am the size I am. Maybe you should accept the fact that your big boned too and should just eat, because your getting way too skinny and you look really gross." I was around 170 lbs at this time, cousin was in the 300 range.
    Me - thankfully seen this comment earlier by a poster on this forum, "Bones don't jiggle."
    Cousin's Husband - the second I said this, he stated, "That's right! That's fat moving, not bones, so stop kidding yourself. R looks fine so back off." Cousin had a 2yr old's tantrum and didn't speak to me for a few weeks.....thank god :)
  • mgibbons22
    mgibbons22 Posts: 69 Member
    My English-as-a-second language Russian friend said, "What happened? There used to be two Mikes, now there is only one Mike!" I about fell over laughing.
  • Shelley6591
    Shelley6591 Posts: 156 Member
    Omg, teach me what you're doooooing!! How do you do it?

    And then I spend a good half hour telling them EVERYTHING, and they completely disregard every word I said. Thanks for wasting my time, jerkface. :grumble:

    This!!!! I am so tired of people asking me how I lost so much weight (15 pounds more than my ticker shows), I tell them I am working my butt off, literally. No one believes me and asks what my secret is implying I have a magic pill, someone asked if I had gastric bypass. I'm over it now and just happy to still be still motivated almost a year after the fact. I decided this is for me, no one else. I do tell people to going MFP and they can see exactly what I eat and do in the run of a day and had became the annoying person who posts fitbit stats on their FB profile after a few haters tried to say I was starving myself! whatever, they need to get over it and get use to me not being the fat chick anymore :happy:
  • Shelley6591
    Shelley6591 Posts: 156 Member
    This was said to me out of the blue, by a morbidly obese cousin who suddenly dispised me when I began loosing weight (but she was fine with me when I was obese)

    Cousin - "You need to gain weight. Your collar bone is showing and that obviously means you anorexic. You look gross." - I had just reached maintenance and was 135 lbs.
    Me - "When you COULDN'T see my collar bones, my doctor stated that I needed to loose weight as I was OBESE. Now that I am at a HEALTHY weight for my height, you can see my colllar bones, and my doctor is VERY happy with my weight."
    Cousin - "Its still disgusting."
    Me - I REALLY ticked her off with this comment, thankfully seen weeks earlier on this forum, "My body, my rules."

    Another "talk" with this same cousin months earlier while I was still in the "loosing" phase of my journey:
    Cousin - "You know, I'm not fat. I'm big boned so that's why I am the size I am. Maybe you should accept the fact that your big boned too and should just eat, because your getting way too skinny and you look really gross." I was around 170 lbs at this time, cousin was in the 300 range.
    Me - thankfully seen this comment earlier by a poster on this forum, "Bones don't jiggle."
    Cousin's Husband - the second I said this, he stated, "That's right! That's fat moving, not bones, so stop kidding yourself. R looks fine so back off." Cousin had a 2yr old's tantrum and didn't speak to me for a few weeks.....thank god :)

    OMG! we must have the same cousin!!!!! haters gonna hate I guess! My Mother use to say I was big boned, I'm not, I showed her recently that if you have a small wrist you are not 'big boned' I have a very small wrist so my bones weren't my issue, I didn't have 240 pounds of bone either....

    We had a bad Winter here and I wore my Winter coat the whole time, it's way too big and everyone was stuck indoors for months hibernating basically, this week it's finally decent out and I can wear my new much smaller clothes I'm hearing 'holy crap!' a lot! I like it :)
  • SuperWhoLock24601
    SuperWhoLock24601 Posts: 245 Member
    The interventions asking if I have an anorexic. Please look at my open diary if you think that.
  • SuperWhoLock24601
    SuperWhoLock24601 Posts: 245 Member
    I showed her recently that if you have a small wrist you are not 'big boned' I have a very small wrist so my bones weren't my issue

    Well, crap! I can never use that excuse. lol
  • Just now I ran into a (male) neighbor, whom I hadn't seen for a few months.
    Him: You are the half of what you used to be! (Greek expression for "You are shrinking")
    Me: Thanks!
    Him: I didn't mean that as a good thing! (Because we all know that being obese is a good thing...:noway: )
    Me:.... :huh: I'm losing it on purpose...
    Him: Oh, ok... :indifferent:
  • des10705
    des10705 Posts: 30 Member
    I usually respond with "Not done yet, still working on loosing more, its a battle everyday, lots of hard choices"
    Then I unzip my jacket and show off the results even more.
    That's the result of hardwork.

    Most people are jealous of your progress and upset with themselves that they are not where you are.

    I get more upset with close family/friends who don't say anything with a 50lbs drop in weight.

    Keep your head up and don't look back......
  • serendipity22
    serendipity22 Posts: 248 Member
    "You look much better. You were such a cubby little thing before".

    Yes, this was said to me. They thought that they were complimenting me.
  • sphkhn
    sphkhn Posts: 456 Member
    I saw one of my friends for the first time in a month and it was shorts weather and she said "You look so skinny and great and now you have chicken legs!" I know it was a positive thing just a funny way of phrasing it and I asked her if she wanted to go running with me and she said no way even though she runs on a treadmill.

    Then I saw an old friend of my grandmothers that I haven't seen in about 5 years and she said "All that walking in New York is doing you good" I wish that was all it took I've lived in pedestrian cities for 6 years and am just now losing.
  • kayduro
    kayduro Posts: 249 Member
    I can relate to that! I notice the 12 lbs lost and can fit in pants I could not do up in September ...but no one else sees. My husband said its so gradual....he does not notice.....
    which he says is a good thing. I did have one woman who I had not seen in a few months say as soon as she saw me "have you lost weight? You look different" - that was music to my ears!

    This is my first post in response to the person who wished folks had commented. Not sure what I did wrong and my reply is in the wrong spot?

    Next time hit 'quote' before yo type your reply and it will post like you want it:)
  • laineybz
    laineybz Posts: 704 Member
    That i need to "eat a doughnut".
  • how do you add the weight loss tracker at the bottom of your posts?
  • firefoxxie
    firefoxxie Posts: 381 Member
    Yeah...after reading all of this, if anyone asks me questions on how I did it I will just say: "Oh! It's this new weight loss plan called the ELMM diet! You should really look it up!" :laugh:
  • mrslstage
    mrslstage Posts: 51 Member
    This older lady at work told me not to lose much more so I didn't "get that insect look".

    Uh...ok...
  • PinkPanther318
    PinkPanther318 Posts: 81 Member
    Hi everyone,

    When I was skinny people would say wow your all skin and bones and I was 140# I was not skin and bones. Now that I have gained way too much weight people say to me how much do you want to lose and I tell them- then they say OMG! from where? Its like I'm sorry would you like to see me naked so I can show you?? lol how rude?
  • MSLUC
    MSLUC Posts: 30
    I just say I'm on the new meatloaf and mashed potato diet.:bigsmile:
  • learide
    learide Posts: 3 Member
    And there are the ones that are constantly shoving candy in your face. I had a friend leaving cookies on my desk on purpose. These people are jealous & when they see your success they will do & say anything to derail you. I started accepting the crap food from her & gave it away or threw it out. Accepting it finally shut her up. People will either compliment you, then there are those whom refuse to compliment you when they can clearly notice the loss. I just tried to focus on myself & kept on going..good luck :)
  • levitateme
    levitateme Posts: 999 Member
    I have overweight coworkers who ask me what I'm doing only to shrug off everything I tell them as something they can't do. " I'm too tired to go to the gym." "Weighing food takes too much time." Really? Weighing out my entire lunch takes literally 3 minutes every morning. I'm going to night school 3 days a week and make it to the gym MWFSu, you go home at 5 every day and sit on your butt. How are you too tired to work out when I'm not?

    My boyfriend's family is funnier because most of them are overweight and forever "dieting" and he and I have respectively lost 40 and 23 lbs since January. When they ask us what we're doing and we say "eating less calories and exercising more" they get all quiet and/or grumpy. When they say "That just doesn't work for me! I've tried everything!" I think to myself "I know you're either cheating on your diets, or not measuring your food properly."

    People tell me that I'm "going to waste away" when I'm still overweight by BMI standards and can squat 70 lbs. I'm doing stronglifts and attempting to increase my weights on all lifts. I haven't seen my mother since the holidays and I'm sure she will tell me I'm "getting too skinny" and that I "shouldn't lift such heavy weights!! It's dangerous!"
  • KatyAverill
    KatyAverill Posts: 166 Member
    I've gotten the "you used to be an enormous whale! you look great now!" and " your stomach used to be out to here *hand gesture*". I know it's meant as a compliment, but it also hurts a little that people thought those things about me.
  • teeduran
    teeduran Posts: 54 Member
    bless you sweetie get better and it's all about you forget others...
  • RuchikaPal
    RuchikaPal Posts: 313 Member
    Thanks for creating this wonderful thread....loved every damn post of all you lovely and inspiring people.... Someday hopefully ill also get yo share my experience on this thread.... Love you awesome people.... :flowerforyou:
  • crazyqueencarla
    crazyqueencarla Posts: 38 Member
    I had something like this for the first time this past Friday. My husband (who has also been lost about 30lbs and is now super fit) and I were at a family dinner with his family. Pretty much everyone in his family is a bit bigger and had SO many questions and odd remarks for us.
    I didn't mind the questions, I know most of them are trying or have tried to lose weight at one point or another... and I have no problem sharing what's helped me. But the odd remarks were just strange.
    For instance, pretty much everything I ate was looked at and asked whether or not it fit in my 'diet'... I had a small bowl of ice cream because it fit in my calories and everyone was remarking about how it must be a cheat day and I'm indulging myself. They seemed pretty flabbergasted when I said I eat whatever I want so long as I have the calories.
    I dunno, it was strange to say the very least....
  • This older lady at work told me not to lose much more so I didn't "get that insect look".

    Uh...ok...

    Hah this made me laugh! I am intrigued to know what "that insect look" is, and why she fears it! Has X-files episode written all over it!
  • Ke11er
    Ke11er Posts: 147 Member
    I can see from the comments here, and do understand that some people enjoy others noticing all the weight loss effort and saying something complimentary. I get why, it is hard work and most of us are feeling better for it. But I think commenting on weight loss is a sticky situation to manage gracefully for most people. Not everyone wants to talk about it. I'd prefer people didn't comment. I guess in my perfect world they wouldn't notice how I look, better or worse. If I'm going to be in a situation where I'm the center of attention I'd rather it be for my character than my appearance. If we're friends lets talk about common interests, hopes and dreams, laugh about old times....but I don't really want to account for my health and fitness choices good or bad and don't feel qualified to coach others. If we're colleagues lets talk about a project, or tell me you appreciate me looking you in the eye and being honest, or sharing a clever idea, or tell me you are grateful if I've been kind....but I don't really want to talk about my weight if I'm heavier or if I'm thinner. If we're family you get more latitude, but ultimately I'm a grown up who makes my own decisions and choices about my health and fitness for me and me alone. I understand and appreciate the concern of my family but I'm not seeking their approval. Some people might not say anything because of folks like me who don't like questions that leave little social room for ignoring (like "have you lost weight?" or "are you ok?") or maybe they've tried to be encouraging at some point and said "you look great, tell me how you're losing all that weight" and learned that newly thinner person is now a chemo patient. If a friend, family member, or even colleague came to me to talk about their weight....like "my doctor says I need to lose weight and I wonder if you'd be willing to field some questions?" I'd be willing to help, but honestly then we'd be talking about their weight, not mine! I've gotten lots of well intentioned comments similar to those described here. I've gotten a few of those back handed jabs ("wow, you look so much better"). No thanks, don't really want any of it. I guess the one that I thought was best came from a colleague I have a long friendly relationship with who as we passed in the hall one day simply smiled and said "you're smokin'!" and never broke stride. No lingering for an awkward discussion just a fly by compliment that encompassed all of me not just the weight loss. That's what I guess I'd recommend because it gives the acknowledgement some would like in a way those who might be more shy about it could also manage. However, if the two are of opposite gender it might not be a good idea at all!
  • johnnyhatesjazz
    johnnyhatesjazz Posts: 95 Member
    They were just jealous. ::laugh:
  • PJPrimrose
    PJPrimrose Posts: 916 Member
    People don't say anything. I only lost enough to get into my weight class (8lbs) and I'm tall.
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